


The Bonds That Never Break

by buddha92



Category: Naruto
Genre: Accidental Kissing, Adolescent Sexuality, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Awkward Boners, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Kissing, Awkwardness, Bathing/Washing, Birthday, Biting, Boys Being Boys, Boys Kissing, Bullying, Canon Rewrite, Childhood Trauma, Come Shot, Complicated Relationships, Dirty Thoughts, Dreams and Nightmares, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Erections, First Kiss, French Kissing, Friendship, Frottage, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Kage Bunshin | Shadow Clones, Licking, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Making Out, Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, Nipple Play, Orgasm, Panic Attacks, Peeping, Penis Measuring, Porn Magazines, Practice Kissing, Precum, Psychological Trauma, Puberty, Ramen, Revenge, Rival Relationship, Rivalry, SasuNaruSasu - Freeform, Secret Relationship, Sexual Experimentation, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Inexperience, Slow Build, Stargazing, Uncircumcised Penis, Violence, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Wet Dream, Yaoi, narusasunaru
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2018-08-07 21:32:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 113,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7730455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buddha92/pseuds/buddha92
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Naruto and Sasuke are two young ninja that have a deep but concealed connection to each other which they refuse to admit out of feelings of pride, rivalry, and obligation. But the ties between them grow and evolve over time until the boys can no longer deny them, plaguing the shinobi with unexpected and strange new feelings of friendship, admiration... and perhaps something else entirely, an odd emotion far more confusing and muddy than any other either of them had felt before. This secret bond follows Naruto and Sasuke all the way from childhood to adulthood on their journeys and conflicts in the ninja world, through their shared pain, heartbreak, struggles, bitterness, and eventually maybe even love. A story of rivalry and loneliness, hatred and love, as two young men struggle to make sense of their twisted feelings for each other and must decide to either protect or destroy their precious bond.</p><p>***On Hiatus***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Kiss and Consequences

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a rewrite of the original story of Naruto that weaves in and out of canon events and goes behind the scenes to explore a secret relationship going on between Naruto and Sasuke. I eventually intend to give the story the altering ending I think it deserved, where the blond loser and the raven jerk will finally meet again after everything they've been though, punch each other, hug each other, and then live happily ever after spending their days annoying and mocking each other. 
> 
> This story will delve into the minds of Naruto and Sasuke to discover their thoughts and emotions about each other while canon events were going on and what kind of intimate stuff they might have gotten themselves into off-screen, so both canon and non-canon events will appear. Odd numbered chapters are semi-canon (as in both events from the manga and new events show up) but even numbered chapters are entirely non-canon original stuff.
> 
> Also, this story will be NaruSasuNaru (or SasuNaruSasu depending on your view, even I can't exactly tell sometimes) so heads up if you don't like switchable relationships or are furiously committed to one particular guy being on top. And it will be fairly smutty and intimately detailed in the next chapters (but not focused solely on the smut) so beware that as well, as I couldn't really figure out if I needed a Mature or Explicit rating.
> 
> Likely wildly irregular update occasions with long spans of time in between. Sorry.
> 
> Tags will be updated as I progress and only reflect content up to the current chapter (but aren't necessarily in order).

_Alone. I’ve always been alone. I've never known what it’s like to have parents, I've never understood what it feels like to be loved and cared for. I’ve never even had a single friend to play and goof off with either. It’s always just been me, all by myself. That's all I've ever known. The other children all run away from me, they call me names and avoid me like I’m sick or something. And the adults always glare at me and mutter things under their breath when they see me. I can see it in their eyes, the way everyone looks at me; they all hate me. Now I know they’re afraid of me because of the Nine Tailed Fox that’s sealed inside me. Because of that no one acknowledges me. Nobody cares about me. The only way people are ever going to acknowledge me is if I become strong. That’s why… I have to become Hokage._

Naruto Uzumaki slowly opened his misty eyes to the light of a new day, wiping away the pooled tears born from his bad dream with his hand. It was a repetitive dream that harassed him constantly over the years, as if cruelly mocking his state of social isolation. How could the boy _not_ dream of how lonely he was deep down? That sadness, that empty feeling harbored deep inside always came to torment him freely in his dreams. He couldn't avoid feeling that way; Naruto was always the outcast, the unwanted burden sitting alone on the edge of a society that excluded him. How many times over the years had he tried to make friends, only to be rejected and pushed away every time? How often in his young life did he hear people whispering nasty comments about him, always just loud enough so he would be sure to hear? Naruto masked his inner loneliness, pushed it deep down beneath the facade of his rambunctious, excitable manner and the strew of pranks he committed in order to receive even the slightest amount of attention, whether positive or negative; even getting cursed out and shouted at was better than being ignored and shunned completely. But that loneliness was still hidden away there in the depths of his heart, even as he tried to hide it from his persecutors so they wouldn’t be able to see the sorrow they inflicted on him. But more than anything, Naruto hid it from himself, pretending everything was alright and their mean-spirited words did not affect him even when they actually did, even when those hateful attitudes wounded him so badly. When everyone else in his class had graduated from the Academy except him, as he sullenly sat in his usual place of exile on the swing hanging from the big tree out in front of the school yard, watching jealously from afar as all the other kids were joyfully congratulated by their parents for their success… that one moment may have been the most alone Naruto had ever felt in his life. People there were actually _glad_ to see him fail and be excluded. It made the boy experience the brutal truth of just how much disdain there was for him in this harsh world.

Though that situation wasn’t so true anymore. There was at least one person in this town who had shown him true kindness; Iruka-sensei, his former teacher. Naruto might still have been reviled and shunned by all the rest of the village, but Iruka had shown that he definitely cared about Naruto. The man might have been too strict a teacher at times and an especially annoying critic of Naruto’s super awesome Sexy Jutsu and hilarious pranks too, but after the incident in the surrounding forest involving the traitor Mizuki and the stolen scroll that he learned the Shadow Clone Jutsu from, Naruto finally understood just how compassionate and heartfelt Iruka could be. The chunin wasn’t tough on Naruto out of spite, but because he wanted the boy to grow and become stronger to overcome his current situation, because Iruka too understood what a lonely life was like, how painful it was to suffer alone in silence while putting on a brave face for the world. Iruka had accepted him when no one else would, and Naruto understood now that unlike many of the other resentful villagers, Iruka didn’t blame him or hate him for having the Nine Tails contained inside himself. Naruto cherished the personal time spent together with his sensei even more now following those realizations, the only person who treated him with dignity and humanity, even if most of the time it was only a brief moment spent eating ramen together or being sternly lectured to. Despite that, it gave Naruto a warm, unfamiliar feeling deep inside, to have even just one person acknowledge his existence and show affection for him. It made the boy feel just a little bit less alone in the world.

“Oh, crap! I’m going to be late!” Naruto shouted after taking a bleary-eyed look at his alarm clock. It was his first day as a genin–finally he was a true bonafide ninja–and his first step on the long, difficult path to becoming Hokage, so that he could prove himself and finally be accepted by the village that shunned him so. One day he would definitely show everyone what an amazing ninja he was. Naruto took a glance down at his forehead protector–which was formerly Iruka’s, given to him as a graduation present–sitting on the bedside table and smiled widely at the thought of his bright future and the bonds he would one day form.

***

_Alone. I choose to be alone. I don’t need other people and I don’t care about the pity they show me or their misplaced good intentions. I just don’t want their annoying presences around me, holding me back from my vengeance. Bonds are nothing more than a distraction that only end up dragging you down and making you weaker. All that matters is that I avenge my family. Nothing else is important, nothing else is worthy of my attention. That’s why… I have to kill him._

Sasuke Uchiha awoke to the sight of the ceiling above him, the same as he did every morning. The stark white material was plain, empty, devoid of any character or meaning; just like everything else in the world to Sasuke, aside from his one and only goal in life. It was the only thing he ever thought about, the sole reason for his continued existence. He cared about nothing else other than learning more and getting stronger, he was consumed by that and only that thought, rabidly pursuing the power he would soon need to fell the target of his vengeance.

Sasuke blinked a few times, trying to clear the fog from his mind as he sat up in his bed. The only sound that greeted his awakening was the casual chirping of a flock of birds tweeting away merrily outside his window in a nearby tree. Nothing else made so much as a peep in this cavernous, hollow manor he called home. No discussions of what he had planned for today, no sounds of breakfast being cooked, none of the commotion and noise that was normal to a home. All that had been silenced long ago. Sasuke was the only one here now, living out his days quietly, but definitely not indifferently or purposelessly in the festering gash of deafening silence that had been inflicted years ago, the empty void of isolation that was his house.

Sasuke let out a tired sigh as he gripped his forehead deep in thought. He had had _that_ nightmare again last night. Though if he were to be honest with himself, it was the only dream Sasuke ever had anymore, whether good or bad; the haunting memories of the downfall of the Uchiha clan. That awful night when his elder brother Itachi slaughtered the whole Uchiha family down to the last person, save for Sasuke himself. It was a specter that came to visit him night after night after night, wickedly tormenting the orphaned boy with the still vivid images of his butchered parents and kinsmen, dark red blood oozing out from their wounds and staining the ground. So much blood pooling into warm, sticky puddles on the floor, so many bodies lying motionless, grotesque and vile in their gory appearance, the faces of his deceased family members twisted into frightening expressions of shock and agony and fear. The nightmare of those sights visiting over and over would have probably deterred most people from thoughts of revenge, terrified them and driven them to depression or even plain madness, but Sasuke wasn’t weak like that. His will wouldn’t be broken by silly bad dreams like a frightened child cowering in the dark from monsters hiding under the bed. No, Sasuke knew what a _true_ monster looked like all too well, what kind of fear such a real villain could inspire. If anything, the recurring horrors he saw in his sleep further strengthened his determination to kill his brother at any cost. It was a constant reminder to Sasuke of just how much had been taken away from him and destroyed. It reminded him of the importance of his hatred. It reminded him to cast everything meaningless in life away and forge himself into a weapon to strike down Itachi.

Sasuke shook his head, attempting to fling away the memories that were never too distant from his thoughts, the things he could never fully rid himself of, not that he would even _want_ to do such a thing. There would be a proper time for his vengeance soon enough, but right now he had to focus on becoming stronger. Without great strength then Sasuke's dream of paying back his murderous brother for the crimes he had committed would remain just that: a dream, an illusion conjured up by a powerless kid. The quicker Sasuke gained power, the quicker he could finally hunt down and bring the end to his elder brother that the traitor so justly deserved. There were many obstacles in his way, a multitude of techniques he needed to learn in order to strike down his prodigy of a brother. But every day got the young man that much closer to that distant target. One day Sasuke swore that Itachi Uchiha would feel the bite of his vengeful wrath.

***

Naruto grumbled to himself with his head laid down dejectedly on the classroom table as he sullenly watched the pretty pink-haired girl Sakura Haruno fawning over the bored-looking jerk sitting to her other side. Sasuke Uchiha was a confident, stuck-up guy who always acted like he was so much cooler and better than everyone else, flaunting his power and drawing everyone's attention to himself. His skills and knowledge in every subject were at the top of the class and he was very popular among his classmates for that raw talent, especially with the girls, who all adored the dark-haired boy for reasons Naruto just couldn’t understand. Sakura had practically shoved Naruto to the ground in her eagerness to get past him and sit next to Sasuke rather than himself. Naruto’s hopes of his secret crush finally taking notice of him had utterly failed and he was quickly bypassed for the other boy, though that was really nothing new; the only times Sakura ever talked to Naruto were to yell at him or berate him for doing something wrong. Sakura was such a cute and nice girl–at least towards pretty much everyone other than Naruto it seemed–and Naruto had developed an unrequited crush on her after their time in the same class, and he now wished he could find some way to get closer to her, some opportunity to finally be taken seriously by her. Unfortunately for him, Sakura wouldn’t even give him the time of day, let alone listen to his confession. She was currently busy making goo-goo eyes at Sasuke while the straight-faced boy stared ahead off into space, completely ignorant of the existence of the girl sitting next to him and eyeing him intensely. Naruto could all but see the invisible hearts floating around Sakura as she gazed adoringly as Sasuke, making him want to gag in disgusted displeasure.

_What’s so good about that guy? He’s so popular, but I don’t get why. I’m much better than he is anyways!_ Naruto confidently assured himself of his own worth and Sasuke's _obviously_ overrated abilities as he jealously watched his crush flirt with another guy. Just because that jerk was a _little_ good at being a ninja everyone came flocking around him like he was a dang celebrity or something. They should all be paying attention to Naruto instead, he was the one who was going to become Hokage one day! Naruto clicked his tongue in annoyance at the revolting sight as Sakura tried again and again to strike up a conversation with Sasuke only to be callously ignored and brushed off by the uncaring boy. That ass had no idea how good he had it getting all the attention from Sakura yet he didn't even care one bit! Naruto had been in such a good mood today too, so excited for his first day as a genin and the chance to rub it in the faces of all his classmates who had doubted him and made fun of him, only for his moment in the sun to be messed up by that damn show-off hogging all the attention and eclipsing his light.

A wicked idea popping into his head all of a sudden, Naruto abruptly hopped up onto the table and crouched down low in front of the sour-looking guy still being gawked at by Sakura, giving Sasuke the best angry, intimidating glare he could muster up. Naruto carefully inspected the jerk through vicious narrowed eyes, trying to understand just what everyone thought was so great about this guy, and maybe psych him out a little bit as a bonus too, let him know that Naruto Uzumaki was no pushover! The normally expressionless Sasuke reacted almost instantly to Naruto's glare and returned the crude gesture back in kind to the blond-headed ninja who had so rudely shoved himself into Sasuke’s personal space and started scowling down at him for no apparent reason. Both of the boys were now glaring intently at each other, a fight ready to break out between them at any moment. This was a direct challenge between the two of them, nothing less than a full call to war! Neither of the boys could give up their silent feud now, too proud and stubborn to admit defeat to the other in this staring contest of angry conflicting wills. The two boy's glowering faces were hardly an inch apart anymore, the intensity of their distaste for each other giving rise to a storm of invisible electric sparks of hatred and animosity flying between them. In the background, the girls of Sasuke’s unofficial fan club cheered and shouted for him to kick Naruto’s ass, further fueling Naruto’s growing irritation and absolute refusal to back down from the challenge.

Just then, in a twist of cruel fate, the kid sitting in the seat behind Naruto accidentally bumped into him, sending the unsteadily crouching blond ninja tumbling forward… straight into the awaiting lips of his biggest rival. Unfortunately for them, with Naruto and Sasuke’s faces so close from their heated battle of wills, there was no time to avoid a direct kiss on the lips between the two boys. Naruto plummeted towards Sasuke with no way of stopping himself before he fell onto the big jerk and Sasuke couldn’t react fast enough to avoid the poisonous fateful kiss of this clumsy moron. From the moment Naruto had invaded his space they had both been doomed to suffer this fate worse than death. Their lips came crashing together with a loud, audible smack heard throughout the room, time standing still for the moment as the two bitter opposites clashed together in an entirely unintended way. The formerly boisterous group of girls standing close by went silent all at once in utter shock, horrified at seeing the town pariah steal a kiss from their idol when they themselves hadn’t even gotten a chance to do that yet. And now they would never get to; the hated dimwit Naruto had robbed them of Sasuke’s treasured first kiss. From now until the end of time, he would always be known as the one who had claimed the precious first taste of Sasuke’s much desired lips.

Naruto’s mind exploded in surprise at the unexpected feeling of his lips pressed against his rival’s, his eyes flying wide open in terror as the blond inadvertently locked lips with Sasuke, who himself wore a similarly frightened and repulsed look. They were both too stunned to even move at the moment, bodies temporarily paralyzed with confusion and disbelief despite the awful lip lock. Beads of nervous sweat trickled down both their ghostly pale faces, both young men completely drained of blood and chilled to the core by this unfortunate turn of events. This couldn’t be real, it had to have been some awful nightmare!

_Gah! I kissed him! My most hated of all rivals stole my first kiss! I feel like I wanna die!_ Naruto cried out in his mind in abject horror, yet he was still too shell-shocked to realize he hadn’t pulled away from the abrupt kiss yet as his stomach flopped around chaotically with a nauseous dread.

After a couple of tense, revolting seconds of utter confusion had ticked by with the pair still locked together at the lips in a daze, Naruto and Sasuke both rapidly tore away from the kiss in a flash as they finally realized just what had happened, the signals at last reaching all the way to their stunned brains that something was definitely amiss here. Both of the boys began gagging and choking dramatically as they rolled around in frustration and revulsion at their unwanted act of connection, horrified with the prospect of swapping spit with someone they utterly loathed.

“I’m going to kill you, Naruto!” Sasuke spat out warningly as he choked in miserable disgust. However, before Sasuke could follow up on his threat, Naruto’s own suffering was interrupted by an ominous presence looming behind him that demanded his immediate attention. Sakura–flanked by a gang of other furious Sasuke groupies–stood ready to thrash him, her face looking more like a demon’s than a young girl’s at the moment, contorted into an expression of barbaric anger as a fiery aura of pure rage burned around her. Naruto gulped with fear and tried in vain to explain himself, tried to tell her that this was all just a horrible, unfortunate accident, but Sakura would hear none of it and continued advancing menacingly towards him, fists ready to pulverize her crush's assailant.

After being pummeled by a furious Sakura in retaliation for stealing a kiss with Sasuke–even if it had been unintended and certainly unwanted–Naruto listened as Iruka-sensei informed his young students that now that they had become genin they would be forming up into teams of three to go on missions.

_Three man teams? I’d really like to be with Sakura… But please not Sasuke. I’ll take anyone other than him. Please, please, oh PLEASE don’t put me with Sasuke!_ Naruto silently pleaded to not be paired up with the boy whom he could do nothing but argue and fight with.

As bad luck would have it, though, he was placed on a team with Sasuke after all. Sakura was put on their squad as well, but with the standoffish black-haired boy there with them Naruto couldn’t exactly celebrate being around his crush; Sakura would certainly pay Naruto no heed like usual and ignore him to seek the attention of the other guy. Naruto tired to protest this unjust treatment, this devastating blow to his ego, this most cruel injustice of being paired up with the biggest prick he had ever met to Iruka-sensei, but his teacher would sadly have none of it. The teams were all supposed to be balanced, the chunin had said, putting the best student Sasuke together with the worst one, that being Naruto. But the only ‘balance’ Naruto was interested in right about now was balancing Sasuke on a cliff so that Naruto could have the pleasure of pushing him over the edge to his doom.

“Just don’t get in my way, loser,” Sasuke quietly taunted while still sitting coolly in his seat, staring off into the distance with an undeniably annoyed look on his face. Naruto wanted to punch him out for that arrogance, but sadly Sakura prevented that, once again clobbering Naruto with her fists of fury to keep him away from her precious Sasuke.

What a crummy day this had turned out to be; avoided and beaten up by the girl he liked, forcibly kissed by the guy he hated, and now expected to work on a team with those same two, the spunky girl who disliked him and the jerk-faced guy whom he hated. Why did things have to turn out like this? _I’ll show him! I definitely won’t lose to Sasuke!_ Naruto promised himself as he stewed in his seat.

***

_Ugh, I can't believe she called me annoying! It may have been to Sasuke’s face, but still, knowing that’s how Sakura really thinks about me is just so depressing_ , Naruto lamented while laying glumly in his bed, recalling his failed kidnapping and impersonation of Sasuke earlier that day done in an attempt to try and get closer to Sakura. He had wanted to know her real feelings about him, if perhaps she had hidden something she felt about him and that there was any chance for him, but in the end it had hurt learning how much Sakura said she actually disliked Naruto and found him obnoxious. Just when Naruto had found the perfect opportunity to move their relationship forward, just when he had finally figured out what he wanted to say to her, things went south so terribly. _Plus, I almost got a kiss with her! I was so close! If my damn stomach hadn’t picked that moment to act up it would have been a sure thing!_ That had definitely been the worst timing ever for an upset stomach to occur out of the blue. On top of his failure to learn anything of value or adequately express his feelings to Sakura, Naruto had also blown perhaps his only chance to have a kiss with the object of his affections. All that effort for nothing. Naruto let out a hefty, discontented sigh after remembering just how close his lips had been to Sakura's before he had had to run off to the bathroom and flopped over onto his side in downcast lethargy.

While lost in his thoughts of his almost-smooch with Sakura, Naruto unconsciously reached out his hand and gently touched a finger to his lips. Kissing had been on his mind a lot recently for some reason. Kisses were a kind of connection to another person, a show of affection between two people who cared about each other. It was an act made out of mutual understanding and feelings of admiration and fondness, things Naruto was desperate to have for himself, that his lonely life lacked. Maybe that was why he had wanted to kiss Sakura badly enough to go so far as to transform into Sasuke and trick her; he liked her and wanted to form that kind of connection with her. Naruto wanted her to notice him, he wanted Sakura to see him as more than the annoying guy who always bothered her and got in her way. Naruto wanted to connect with someone on that intimate personal level, to feel needed and liked and have his feelings returned. He was tired of being hated and alone.

But he had found himself kissing the bastard Sasuke instead. That was a kind of connection to Sasuke that Naruto had never, ever, _ever_ wanted to have. It was already bad enough that they were now teammates. Even _that_ was too much of a relationship with Sasuke for Naruto to handle, his blood boiling at the thought of being around that smart-mouthed jackass all the time from here on out. Naruto had hoped that trying to kiss Sakura would have washed away the lingering memories of that terrible kiss and purified his lips of the evil residue Sasuke had left behind, but he had no such luck. Sasuke had forcibly taken his first–and so far only–kiss and unfortunately that sad fact could never be undone no matter how much Naruto wished it could. The thought of that awful act just wouldn’t go away and leave him alone, no matter how much he tried to scrub it from his mind. It hung there in the back of his head all throughout the day as he quietly mulled about the power of kisses, tormenting him with a reality he would have loved to ignore. Instead, again and again those events replayed in Naruto’s brain, his unstoppable slow motion descent onto the awaiting lips of his rival, the sudden bolt of fear and disgust that went tearing through his body like white-hot lightning as the two boys unexpectedly impacted together, that weird feeling surging in the pit of his stomach as another pair of lips touched his own. It was all stuck on an infinite loop in the movie theater of his brain.

In some small, dark corner of his mind, however, Naruto wondered if that accidental kiss with Sasuke had actually been all that terrible after all. Sure, it had been shocking and kinda scary, but it didn't feel all that bad really. Despite his pale, almost doll-like skin, Naruto had been surprised to find that Sasuke’s lips carried a lively warmth to them. For some reason he had expected them to be cold to the touch, matching the boy’s chilly personality and uncaring expression. They had been soft, too, sort of puffy and plump in a weird way. Warm and soft; not two qualities that Naruto would typically associate with the distant and stiff Sasuke. At the very least, Naruto had been able to experience something that he had never expected to, right? He had been able to have his first kiss, even if it was with a total jackass of a guy. But, it was still better to know what it was like than to be in the dark forever... Right? In truth, it had actually felt kind of… nice kissing Sasuke’s unexpectedly soft lips, feeling that sort of connection to another person that Naruto never had before, that he had longed to feel…

“Wait, what the hell am I thinking about!?” Naruto cried out in disbelief and sprung up in his bed all of a sudden, alarmed at his current train of thought. “Of course it was bad. Horrible, disgusting, gross, absolutely terrible!!” the boy vigorously shouted aloud in his otherwise empty room, trying to convince himself of his own disgust more than anything at the moment. Naruto sat here alone and yet he felt like he was being silently judged by someone for his private thoughts, like invisible eyes were watching him ready to react if he actually voiced those odd thoughts running wildly through his mind about that odd kiss, if he dared to say aloud that even though he hated Sasuke the kiss with his fierce opponent might not have been all _that_ awful.

“Hmm… Shadow Clone Jutsu!” Naruto called out impulsively after thinking relentlessly to himself for a long moment, agonizingly debating the topic at hand back and forth in his head, weighing the pros and cons of the issue until he finally decided to just go with it and formed the required hand seals, creating a replica of Sasuke by combining the Shadow Clone and Transformation jutsus who appeared in a poof of smoke and stood obediently beside Naruto’s bed. Naruto cautiously looked from side to side around his room like someone about to cross the street, scanning his surroundings in a paranoid manner, despite him being the only one who lived in this small apartment. If anyone happened to see what he was about to do next, even by accident, he would never be able to live it down. He would definitely die of shame!

Naruto stood up from his bed and stared at the Shadow Clone Sasuke, carefully inspecting it for flaws. He could see no visible mistakes or deformities; Naruto had gotten pretty good with his newest jutsu after all, and took a moment to appreciate his excellent handiwork before suddenly realizing that he was basically eyeing and appreciating Sasuke–even if it wasn’t the real one–and instantly became flooded with irritation and embarrassment. The clone stared blankly back at its master, awaiting any orders to carry out without a word as its creator diligently inspected him. He looked exactly like Sasuke, a mirror image down to the individual strands of hair, but as Naruto looked him over he noticed something about the clone was off, something Naruto couldn’t quite place his finger on. The Sasuke clone might have been showing off his characteristic unamused, bored expression and been wearing copies of his clothes, but it lacked any of Sasuke’s typical harsh atmosphere or the smug, superior attitude that he always carried with him. Naruto wasn't really sure just how to explain it. The shadow clone may have looked like Sasuke, but somehow it just didn’t _feel_ like him.

Shrugging at the differences between the clone jerk and the real jerk that he couldn’t quite put into words, Naruto took a single deep breath in anticipation for his stupidly reckless test. Once he had prepared himself for the next phase of his little experiment, Naruto leaned forward closer to the shadow clone and abruptly kissed him out of the blue, quickly planting his lips on the fake Sasuke’s despite all his objections and cries of revulsion to kissing the real Sasuke earlier. The clone accepted Naruto's kiss wordlessly, without trying to shove him away and with no put down or witty remark in response, which was also very unlike the real Sasuke. There was no air of tension or feelings of unwantedness in the act like there had been during his previous kiss with the real Sasuke. Instead it simply felt cold, boring, almost meaningless. The lips were still so unusually soft, the face was still the same, yet something just didn’t feel like it had during the accidental smooch before. Perhaps it lacked that certain excited energy that had been present back in the classroom, the feeling of tension and fear that had burned through Naruto’s body like a surprising jolt of electricity when he fell onto Sasuke. Kissing this clone didn’t give Naruto that same anxious, tumultuous feeling in the pit of his stomach that kissing the real Sasuke did, a reaction that had been strangely similar to the kind of giddy, nervous feeling he got when planning out a particularly brilliant prank.

_Huh. It didn’t really feel the same as last time_ , Naruto pondered, almost disappointed with the results of his test as he slowly pulled away from the kiss. _Was it just a fluke the first time then?_ the boy wondered curiously. ...Maybe he had just been overthinking things after all. Sure, it had been a kiss, which Naruto had been very eager to try out lately, but not at all the kind of kiss he had wanted his first to be. Naruto had wanted to kiss someone he liked and who would like him back, not a mutual enemy like Sasuke. That kind of kiss was completely worthless to him. Just what kind of bonds could he form with that kind of empty gesture? Sure, he had at last been able to rid  his lips of their virginity, but at what cost to his sanity and sense of pride? ...But still, despite the results of his trial, despite all his numerous misgivings, Naruto just couldn’t shake the memory of the strange new feeling of Sasuke’s lips out of his mind. Disgusting, exciting, frightening, warm, humiliating, soft. There were so many words that came to mind all swirling around in his head at once that Naruto just didn’t know how to describe it anymore.

_...Wait, I seriously need to stop thinking about this! Stop and just go to sleep!_ Naruto told himself, realizing just how ridiculously much time and effort he was focusing on this bizarre topic. He abruptly dismissed the clone and flopped back into bed, unbelievably embarrassed with himself for even considering the act he had just attempted.

***

_I can’t believe that annoying girl thought it would be nice to not have parents_ , Sasuke pondered while laying in his bed staring up at the blank ceiling. Earlier that day he had blatantly told Sakura off after she had made fun of Naruto, the girl blaming his over the top actions on his lack of parents, calling him a selfish brat who ran wild without any supervision, and then she actually went so far as to claim that he was _lucky_ not to have parents to tell him what to do, how she would have been grounded if she did the sort of things Naruto did. Sasuke couldn’t help but to snap at her after she said that; he had absolutely zero patience for that kind of talk. That girl couldn’t understand the pain of not having a family to depend on, she didn’t know the sadness of being completely alone like Naruto did… and like Sasuke did. She had no idea what it felt like to have to learn how to do everything on your own at such a young age, how to cook and clean and sew and survive all by yourself, to have no one to ask for help or to rely on or even just to talk to.

How many times had Sasuke messed up trying to cook himself dinner over the years for example? How many times had he accidentally spilled meals onto the floor while cooking, prepared food the wrong way, or–worst of all–made too much food, the uneaten portions a bitter reminder of people who were no longer there? How often had he been cut and burned trying to use tools and instruments he had never used before and that weren’t even designed for someone his age, getting so frustrated and angry at his failed attempts at cooking that he just felt like laying down and crying? He had been too young to know how his mom cooked meals just the way he liked or what kind of cleaning supplies were the right ones to use or how to do the laundry properly and many other things that his parents had done for him. He had been far too young to become the head of a household. Yes, too young to be the head of a _dead_ house, leader not by merit or worth, but by necessity; he was the only one _left_ to be head of the Uchiha clan, forced by circumstance to take on that role upon himself.

Surely, Naruto had also experienced all those things as well throughout his life, and likely many of the other burdens than came with pure isolation too, like the soul crushing utter silence, the lack of anyone to call your name or tell you good morning or say I love you. Being alone in the world at such a young age was never an easy thing to deal with regardless of the details. Sakura’s cruel words had stirred up a hornet’s nest residing in Sasuke’s heart, an irritated swarming emotion springing forth inside himself as he stood still and listened to her insult Naruto. For some reason Sakura mocking Naruto for his isolation annoyed Sasuke just as much as if she had directed her words at him. He certainly didn’t like the idiot–Naruto was loud, dimwitted, and rambunctious, all things Sasuke found hard to tolerate–but he didn’t deserve so much mean spirited bile. _No one_ deserved to be treated that way, to be made to feel so alone and helpless.

_I think I might feel… a little sympathetic towards Naruto now_ , Sasuke thought with an entirely uncommon amount of concern for himself, but quickly shifted back to his normal tone after the thought. _He’s still a useless loser, though. He better not get in my way now that we’re teammates. ...I’m definitely going to get him back for kissing me, too_ , Sasuke swore to avenge his shattered honor against the idiot who had defiled his lips. He had tried to brush that event off and pretend it was no big deal, but how could being kissed, even accidentally, by such a complete idiot _not_ be something to worry about?

Sasuke’s mood suddenly changed upon thinking about that kiss again and he was flooded with weird half-hearted feelings about that issue as his stomach unexpectedly twisted and turned with irritation and nervousness. Memories of the event had hovered obnoxiously in the back of his mind ever since it had occurred, memories that Sasuke had been desperately trying to ignore, to little success so far. That idiot’s lips had even left behind the faint aftertaste of miso on his own lips to accentuate the frustrating sensation. Just how much ramen did he eat anyways? That shocking feeling of those stupid lips pressed up against his own was such a foreign feeling, though. Sasuke had never experienced anything quite like it in his life. He never had time for such frivolous things like that. _That was… strange. I’ve never done that before. It was gross, but also not so gross at the same time…_ Sasuke sighed deeply, frustrated with his continuing train of thought that flip flopped in an uncharacteristically indecisive manner. That damn Naruto had seriously messed up his head with that stunt. Sasuke's own contradictory opinions about the matter were seriously getting on his nerves now. Was it a bad occurrence or did he just not actually care about what had happened? He honestly couldn't decide anymore. ‘Good’ definitely wasn’t an option on the table, but maybe ‘alright’ or ‘tolerable’ worked… He didn't think that kissing itself wasn’t bad or nasty, just not something Sasuke had cared to think much about; he had far more important things to worry about. He had never really expected to have his first kiss with how one tracked his life had become since all those years ago, so it was quite a shock to experience that loss of innocence. But kissing _that_ guy… Of all the people in the world, just why did it had to have been him? Sasuke must have brushed his teeth ten times by now, but he swore that he could still taste the left behind miso flavor on his lips.

And now Sasuke was suffering the after effects of that crazy coincidence; all that ran through his mind all day long had been thoughts of Naruto. First Sasuke had suffered that blasted stomach twisting kiss, then he had been attacked by Naruto during lunch and tied up for no good reason, and then that annoying girl had to go and put him in an even worse mood than he already was and actually make him sympathize with the loser when that was exactly the last thing he wanted today. All throughout the day Naruto kept obnoxiously inserting himself where he wasn’t wanted, and now that Sasuke was ready to go to sleep he couldn’t stop thinking about that idiot because of it, his mind filled with thoughts of stupidly grinning ramen loving losers who had a lot more in common with himself than Sasuke would have liked to admit. Being forcibly kissed wasn’t exactly something you could just easily forget about after it had happened, even if it was with someone you hated.

But even still, it was just one simple kiss with one simple guy. In the end Sasuke tried to convince himself it wasn’t that big of a deal. It wasn’t really all _that_ disgusting; it’s not like the loser had put his gross tongue inside his mouth or anything. Best to just forget it and move on; he had far more important matters than this stupid accident to worry about. Sasuke assured himself that he would put the matters of his wounded pride and conflicting feelings behind him and focus his attention where it needed to be. That was what Sasuke had been doing for years now, ignoring all the useless information and events in his life to devote himself to annihilating Itachi, sorting out the important things from the meaningless everyday garbage.That was what Sasuke had _tried_ to do at least, put it all behind him and move on. But for some weird reason on this one occasion he just… couldn’t. The thoughts of that spontaneous moment stayed glued in his head, irritating Sasuke all day long until now his mind refused to quiet down and rest.

Sasuke couldn't help but wonder why was he obsessing so much about something he usually would have brushed off and quickly forgotten. Whether it was gross or not, whatever odd emotions that kiss conjured up inside him, he eventually should have gotten over it and moved on to something of real importance. It wasn’t like it mattered at all anyway, just a fluke occurrence that had no real meaning or importance to either himself or Naruto. But Sasuke just couldn’t ignore this, try as he might, it was haunting him. Why had something like this affected him so much? It was almost as if... his subconscious was mocking him, toying with him about how similar their situations were, how much of himself he saw in Naruto's outbursts made out of lonely desire for attention and respect. _...I must be turning stupid to even be thinking about something pointless like this. That loser must have infected me with his stupidity_ , Sasuke thought melodramatically before pulling the blankets over his head in a huff, seeking to escape his continued thoughts of a certain yellow-haired dumb ass unfortunately still on his mind.

***

Kakashi-sensei was being totally unfair! How was Naruto expected to fight without any food in his stomach? It was hard enough trying to catch one of those damn bells attached to the jounin’s belt as it was, but Naruto was feeling himself getting weaker with hunger as time wore on and Kakashi continued to effortlessly outmaneuver and trick his new students like they were mere toys there for his amusement. So after failing that test, here Naruto was, tied to a stump as punishment for breaking the rules and trying to eat early. Going so far as forbidding Sakura and Sasuke from giving Naruto any food under penalty of failure; they had definitely found themselves a cruel sensei.

“This is no problem!” Naruto shouted out reassuringly, but more directed at himself than at his new teammates, as he tried to persuade his own tired, hungry body that everything was normal. “I’m totally fine, I don’t need any food! I feel stronger than ever!” But his words of self-persuasion obviously failed as an almost frighteningly loud rumble came from his stomach, cutting through the otherwise quiet air like a crash of thunder as Sasuke and Sakura silently ate their prepared lunch boxes.

_I’m sooooooo hungry!_ Naruto thought in desperation as he whimpered from famished weakness. There was just no way he would be able to get one of those bells without having any food; proper nourishment was vital to the use of chakra. Pulling off any jutsu now would be all but impossible without having anything to eat all day long; fighting with Kakashi earlier had drained what chakra he had and now Naruto was running on empty. The boy’s stomach continued to growl loudly like a ravenous wild beast angrily demanding to be fed as he tried in vain to come up with a plan.

This was so damn depressing. After finally becoming a genin, _this_ was as far as he could go? All that hard work, all those assurances Naruto gave his rivals and doubters and enemies that he would become a great ninja one day, all the suffering and pain and loneliness he had fought through and endured, and _this_ was where that difficult path ended? Naruto began gloomily contemplating his sorry future, how he would never accomplish anything great, his goals remaining just mirages off in the distance. All of this just because of a few missed meals; what a sad life he had in store.

“Here,” Sasuke said all of a sudden with a sigh of resignation. In his thrust out hand was his boxed lunch, held out towards Naruto who looked down at him in confusion.

“Sasuke, what are you doing? Kakashi-sensei said not to!” Sakura protested his action.

“Kakashi isn’t around now. We have to work together if we want to get the bells and if Naruto is hungry he’ll just drag us down,” Sasuke explained plainly, preemptively brushing off any accusations that he was actually being nice that the two of them might have made.

_Maybe this guy isn’t such a bastard after all_ , Naruto remarked to himself in amazement at Sasuke’s completely unexpected act of defiance against Kakashi. Any guy who shared his food in this kind of situation couldn’t have been all bad, right? Was Sasuke actually… being _nice_ to him? No, maybe not nice exactly, but he was being less of a jerk than usual to be sure. This was a very odd course of action for Sasuke to make, for him to show any amount of kindness or tolerance towards Naruto at all was unheard of. He had never done so before, always treating Naruto like an annoyance and a pest beneath himself. Maybe Kakashi’s stern lecture had gotten to him or something.

Earlier Kakashi-sensei had given his new students a major chewing out about their lack of ability to work together. They had failed to get any of the bells because they all had no trust or respect for each other as teammates. They worked as individuals, not as a group striving together to accomplish their goals. Teamwork was the most important part of being a ninja was what Kakashi had told them. Completing missions required a high level of understanding between comrades and without that group effort it would lead only to failure and death.

Teamwork. It was something Naruto had never tried or even thought of trying before. It was difficult for him to trust people or get along with anyone because of his wariness of being hurt. You couldn't really trust anyone when all people did was persecute and belittle you before you even tried to get to know them. A situation like that had happened to Naruto before after all; a few years back, Naruto had cautiously approached and tried to become friends with a group of kids in his class who surprisingly had said yes to him. Naruto had been elated at the prospects of finally making some friends, people who would actually accept him, but he quickly found out they were just tricking him so they could manipulate and bully him even more than they already did. They had never meant it in the first place. Those kids had flat out lied to him. While it had meant the would to Naruto, it was all just a big fucking joke to them. In the end he was even worse off for having tried to trust them, felt even more isolated than he had before. Every time Naruto put himself out there and attempted to make friends he was rejected, every rejection leaving him a little bit sadder and a little more bitter. Eventually with time and a whole bunch of rejected overtures he just stopped trying, overly tired of getting crushed time after time. Ever since then Naruto had kept his guard up even more than he previously had around people, swearing not to trust anyone.

Naruto had teammates now, though. He _had_ to place his trust in them, and they in him, for the sake of the mission. In order to continue his path to becoming Hokage, Naruto knew he had to both gain and give respect and trust, learn to rely on people, starting first with these two teammates of his. It was tough, and deep down the thought of being betrayed and hurt again was very scary to him, but maybe… Just maybe… If he tried, then maybe he might be able to build the bonds that he had always wanted.

Naruto had only been fed–with his new allies’ assistance, since his hands were tied up at the moment–a few bites of Sakura and Sasuke's own lunches before Kakashi suddenly reappeared in a poof of dust with a booming, threatening voice in reaction to the sight before him.

“You guys… pass!” he said in an oddly cheery manner, quickly shifting his formerly frightening demeanor to a much more agreeable tone.

“We pass? How?” Sakura asked in utter confusion.

“All the other teams I've had listened to every word I said and never thought for themselves. You guys are the first who ever disobeyed me. Ninja who break the rules are regarded as garbage, that's true. But I think ninja who abandon their comrades are even worse than garbage. You stuck by your teammate even though I warned you not to and didn't abandon Naruto when he needed help. So you pass.”

“Yay! I did it! I’m a ninja! Ninja!” Naruto cheered merrily at the news, little tears of happiness welling up in his eyes. Kakashi-sensei… he was actually pretty cool. He obviously cared about his comrades and had strong feelings about teamwork. Naruto found he admired that attitude and almost immediately decided he wanted to emulate it from now on. The jounin’s value for cooperation and friendship was something that Naruto had long wanted for himself, to fit in and be respected and have friends of his own that he could depend on. Maybe here on Team 7, with a sensei and teammates like these, he had finally found a place for himself to be accepted. Maybe he could finally have the same connections to people that others did.

“...Hey, where are you going?! Wait, come back! Unite me you guys!” Naruto shouted ineffectively as Kakashi, Sakura, and Sasuke all suddenly stood up and walked triumphantly off, content in their success at having passed this test, leaving him still tied to the stump unable to move. Naruto took it all back; having teammates was definitely the worst!

***

_Dammit, dammit, dammit!_ Naruto cursed to himself in disgust and irritation, the reality of the current situation stinging his sense of pride like salt being ground into a fresh wound. He hadn’t been able to do anything at all. A dangerous situation where his skills as a ninja were needed had arisen out of nowhere on this new mission, only for the genin to freeze up at the critical moment when it was most important to stay alert. Sasuke on the other hand had been so calm, so powerful, so _cool_ that it really pissed Naruto off. How frustrating it was to be confronted with his own lackings and upstaged by his rival so easily. Sasuke had jumped into the heart of danger without even a second thought, he had been so confident and in-command in that dangerous situation against unknown assassins; hadn’t he been even just a little bit scared when confronted with the very real possibility of life and death?

As Team 7 escorted the bridge builder named Tazuna back to his home country as per their mission details, they had been jumped by surprise by a pair of enemy ninja and Kakashi-sensei had supposedly been taken out by the assassins in a split second before anyone could react. Even after Kakashi had seemingly been sliced to bits of gruesome flesh by the  mysterious foes, Sasuke hadn’t shown even a twinge of self-doubt and instead fearlessly charged out to repel the assailants. And when these clawed killers had moved on to strike at Naruto next he had done nothing at all to stop his own impending doom. He had just stood there like an idiot, too dumbstruck and afraid to even try to save himself. But Sasuke on the other hand had jumped in willingly and rescued him so effortlessly in no time flat, like it was nothing at all. Even Sakura had done her duty to protect their client, stayed true to the mission and threw herself in front of Tazuna as one of the clawed men came charging at the old man. And still Naruto did nothing. Of course, in the end Kakashi-sensei was actually alright all along and had saved them all from the enemy ninja, but even so that didn't make Naruto any happier. Naruto hadn’t been able to do a single damn thing. He had been weak and worthless when he and his team were in mortal danger. Just what kind of ninja was he supposed to be exactly?

Naruto had been petrified, frozen in place with the fear of his own imminent death chilling his bones, unable to bring himself to do anything useful to help, yet Sasuke so expertly took command of the situation and saved Naruto from the assassin's attack without batting an eye. That had been the worst part of all. In that moment as Sasuke jumped to his rescue and fended off the attack that would have surely ended his life, Naruto couldn’t help but admire Sasuke for his courage and strength. His agile movements, his overflowing confidence, his remarkable skill, everything about the black-haired boy had been so magnificent in that split-second as he went soaring into the air, then came crashing down onto the enemies like an amazing black bird swooping down from the skies to Naruto's rescue. But that fact was exactly what Naruto hated the most right now, what relentlessly tore at his ego. Thinking Sasuke was amazing, letting that bastard protect him, was there anything more humiliating? He didn’t want Sasuke’s help. Naruto didn’t want Sasuke to save him. Anyone but _him_ would have been fine. Being saved by that smug bastard was an experience so embarrassing, so humiliating and irritating that it almost physically hurt. But Naruto knew that if Sasuke hadn’t of jumped in when he did him that he might have been dead right now, leaving a very bitter taste in the irate boy's mouth, the fetid taste of defeat and envy.

_Argh! Why are we so different? I practice jutsu every day, I study and train hard too, and I’ve completed lots of missions._ Things were supposed to be different now. He was part of a team now, working diligently towards his goal of becoming Hokage will his fellow shinobi allies. Naruto was finally a true ninja and had at last earned some small amount of respect from a small group of people, no longer completely alone in the world. Things had changed so much, he was supposed to be stronger than before. Naruto had trained relentlessly to close the gap between himself and his ultimate rival, worked himself ragged day after day to finally be on the same level as that proud boy and to have Sasuke recognize that fact. He wanted to earn Sasuke's respect too. Naruto wanted to be that good, that strong, that confident. Naruto had lagged behind his rival for so long in their time back at the Academy, so after all his hard work he had thought they were finally on even ground. But even now, after everything he had learned and experienced, he was still so far behind Sasuke, that was evidently clear. Sasuke was still a mirage off in the distance, a target to test himself against that Naruto didn't know if he could ever actually reach. _Why can’t I ever keep up with him?!_

Naruto’s self-pity party was suddenly interrupted by Sasuke calling out to him, waking the distraught genin from his thoughts of frustrated despair. “Hey… Are you okay, little scaredy-cat?” Sasuke asked in an undeniably belittling tone, a mocking sneer on his face as he gloated superiorly. The damned smug look on his face right now as he basked victoriously in Naruto’s inner turmoil… Naruto had never wanted to punch someone so hard before in his life. And he would have too, if only Kakashi-sensei hadn’t have told him to stand still because of the poison coursing through the wound on his hand inflicted by the claws of their attackers. The cut he had gotten when he was too scared to even run away, a mark of deep shame...

As Kakashi and the others chatted on about the attack on their lives and the true nature of this mission, Naruto could do nothing but clench his teeth in frustration. The poison coursing through his hand certainly stung, but being made fun of, _especially_ by Sasuke, that stung even more so. _I’ll show him who’s the scaredy-cat_ , Naruto promised himself as he stewed in quiet irritation. He wouldn’t let something like this happen again. Never again. Next time it would be Sasuke who needed help, Sasuke who was the one not able to do anything and needing rescue. He would just have to get even stronger from here on out, keeping fighting to reach that mirage on the horizon. That look in Sasuke’s eyes, that bitter feeling of being looked down on... Naruto was so sick of seeing that look directed his way from those dark, superior eyes. Naruto would work hard so that one day he would _force_ Sasuke to recognize him as an equal and accept him as worthy rival. He was tired of being seen as the last one in class rankings, the loser, the perpetual screw up. One day Naruto swore that he would show Sasuke what kind of ninja he really was, what kind of passion and fierce intensity of desire lay in his heart. That jerk had made a fool of him for the last time.

As Naruto fearlessly drew his kunai from its holster and suddenly stabbed it into his wound in one quick motion to release the poison, he vowed that he wouldn’t let himself be afraid anymore. He would be a strong ninja, one worthy of becoming Hokage some day. Then Sasuke and everyone else who had made fun of him would regret it and be sorry and know that they were wrong about him. He swore on the burning pain he was experiencing as the kunai dug into his flesh that he wouldn’t allow himself to be a joke anymore and he wouldn’t lose to Sasuke anymore. Naruto Uzumaki would never back down and he would not run away.

Everyone reacted in shock as they watched Naruto recklessly take the blade and jam it into his own hand. Even Sasuke looked at the sight baffled and amazed at his teammate’s unexpected actions. And as he looked at Naruto wincing in pain, standing there in resolute determination instead of his former fear, perhaps just a tiny bit of newfound admiration and respect washed over Sasuke’s face.

***

“Ugh, I’m so tired,” Naruto complained weakly, barely able to stand on his own two feet as he shuffled along wearily.

“That’s because you trained until you could barely walk, stupid,” Sasuke berated Naruto as the blond shambled down the road with numb and rubbery legs, regrettably leaning against the taller boy with his arm braced around Sasuke's shoulders for support as the exhausted pair of boys slowly limped their way back to Tazuna's house in the Land of Waves. He didn't _want_ to be this physically close to Sasuke, but at the moment Naruto was just too fatigued to put up any worthwhile arguments against receiving any assistance from his rival. They had both worked extra hard from sun up to sun down on learning their new training regimen of focusing chakra in their feet and running up trees, each attempting to outdo the other, pushing them to work a lot more aggressively than was probably necessary, leaving them both broken down and dead tired. Naruto had practically worked himself into physical exhaustion, expending all of his seemingly boundless energy on mastering the technique, but Sasuke himself was nearly as worn out as Naruto was too. After a lot of sweat and effort put in by both of the young ninja, the competing rivals had successfully gotten to the very tops of the tallest trees around and were now caked in grime and dirt due to the strenuous effort required of their training.

At first Naruto had lagged irritatingly far behind Sasuke in the frustratingly difficult act and was tossed off the trees forcefully, unable to get the hang of the technique, but after some helpful pointers from Sakura and a lot of determination to effectively compete against his sworn rival, Naruto had steadily progressed his way up the tree bit by bit until he was finally keeping pace with Sasuke. Sure, he hadn’t exactly been able to beat Sasuke outright, but for the first time in his life Naruto was able to match him in ability in the end, which was almost as good an outcome. Maybe that would  get that bad-mooded guy to finally realize that Naruto was no joke and to pay him some respect. As an added bonus, that embarrassed face that Sasuke–who was having his own troubles performing the tree running–had made when he asked Naruto about the tips he had gotten from Sakura was just oh-too-sweet! Stubborn, prideful Sasuke actually looking ashamed and asking Naruto for assistance: it was almost as tasty as a big steaming bowl of ramen!

Following the rather awkward conversation in Tazuna's house, where Naruto shouted at the bridge builder's grandson for his apparent weakness and indecisiveness, the emotionally fragile little boy had run off and Kakashi went along as well to comfort the hurt child and explain Naruto's supposedly callous manner. Naruto, completely unrepentant for his forcefulness in the situation, instead opted to go clean up after a long, tough, dirty day of training. He could still barely walk, however, his legs weak and rubbery from hours of effort and struggle, so Sasuke had to help lug him into the bathroom, and once he was there the dark-haired ninja decided to bathe along with Naruto to conserve water.

Naruto sighed absentmindedly as he slipped into the bathtub after scrubbing away the layers of dirt and sweat off his sore body, his mind full of unusual thoughts that weighed heavily on him. Something had been bugging him recently, but Naruto couldn’t make heads or tails of it no matter how much he thought about it. Ever since he had been assigned to Team 7, and even more so since the start of this mission in particular, it had been gnawing at him, but he couldn't find an answer to his inquiry. Just why on earth had he been paired up with Sasuke in the first place? Naruto wasn’t just whining or complaining about it anymore either, like a child throwing a tantrum when he didn’t get his way. He had really begun to wonder what the reasoning behind the two boys being put together on a team had been. After the new genin had all been assigned to teams, Iruka-sensei had said all the genin squads were supposed to be balanced, but Naruto didn’t really understand what that was supposed to even mean. How could he ever find ‘balance’ with Sasuke? The two of them were very different people with clashing personalities. They didn’t get along at all and could barely go five whole minutes without fighting or arguing. They had absolutely nothing in common and shared no interests or hobbies either. Just how were they supposed to work together and be a team then? What use was balance in a relationship like that? Whoever had decided that they should be put together in the first place must have known or at least been informed of the kind of confrontational relationship the two of them had; it was no secret back at the Academy that they hated each other. So then why had two people who disliked each other so much been selected for the same team? Had it actually just been chance, random names being drawn from a hat or something like that, or had someone–maybe Iruka or the Hokage–picked out the two of them specifically for some reason? ‘Balance’ meant they were supposed to become equals, that they were supposed to grow and change, didn’t it? It meant that by being together they would learn and gain something from each other, right? But just what the hell could he learn from Sasuke besides how to be a massive jackass with a dumb face? And what the heck was Sasuke supposed to be gaining from him?

Naruto sunk deep down into the tub of hot water until only his head from his nose up still stuck out and sighed pensively again, causing a stream of air bubbles to splash up and pop. He just didn't get it at all. Maybe he was completely off in his thinking. Maybe there was no great hidden meaning or objective to their partnership and it happened only because Sasuke was so good at everything he did, so damn irritatingly smart and talented and great and Naruto just… wasn’t. Maybe there really wasn’t any deeper meaning to it.

But as Naruto continued to force out a little volcano of bubbles in the bath water something finally clicked in his head. It wasn’t exactly true to say they had nothing in common. There was one thing they shared, something so obviously huge that Naruto couldn’t believe he had missed it all this time: they were both orphans. And on top of that, they both had no friends their own age, Sasuke avoiding interacting with people unless absolutely necessary and Naruto being avoided by those same people like he was a plague victim. Was that it after all then? Were they made teammates because they both were alone? Had they been placed together because someone thought that they would be able to understand and empathize each other? Naruto couldn't help but wonder. Naruto usually didn’t like thinking this way considering how much Sasuke got on his nerves, but if the boy were to be brutally honest with himself there had been times when he was younger when he had thought that because of the similar situations that maybe the only other person in the village who might have understood how he felt would have been Sasuke, and that maybe Sasuke also felt… _No, forget about it_ , Naruto convinced himself as he immediately stopped blowing his stream of water bubbles at that troubling thought of feelings long since passed. He didn’t feel like dragging up all those old unresolved feelings again after he had worked to put them away and become a bitter competitor to Sasuke. Better to let those feelings stay buried where they belonged. However he had felt back then made no difference to things right now. In the end they were rivals and teammates forced to work together, that was all that mattered now.

One thing was certain, however. Even though Naruto believed he would never be able to work together with Sasuke, when Kakashi-sensei had been caught by the assassin Zabuza’s Water Prison Jutsu the pair both were forced to put their differences aside and combine forces to save their teacher. The plan they had hatched up on the fly and without even so much as speaking to each other had worked remarkably well and ended up saving the day, freeing Kakashi and stopping Zabuza in his tracks. If someone had seen Naruto and Sasuke in action fighting against Zabuza they would have probably thought that the boys often trained together and got along well instead of the truth of the matter. In the end Kakashi’s very first lesson on the importance of teamwork had been put to the test in the midst of heated conflict and proven to be true. It wasn’t that they _couldn’t_ work together then. If Sasuke and Naruto really tried at it and put their minds towards a common goal then they could coordinate perfectly well; they even made a pretty good pair of fighters, able to intuitively understand each other's tactics and react quickly to how the other was thinking. So maybe that was what balance meant after all: finding a sense of teamwork, cooperation, and mutual trust with one's comrades.

As Naruto sat soaking his burning muscles in the large tub that dominated the room contemplating things his young mind didn't fully understand, he took a sideways glance at Sasuke’s bare back while the raven-haired boy was seated on a wooden stool placed underneath the shower head,  carefully scrubbing himself clean with a washcloth as the water poured down on him. “Hey, Sasuke…” Naruto called out timidly as they bathed together in the cramped bathroom.

“Hm?” Sasuke questioned without turning to face Naruto, focusing on continuing to rid himself of the filthy residue of a long day’s hard work.

“Th-thanks for helping me get back here. And for the other day when I fell out of the tree and you caught me, too…” Naruto chuckled nervously, issuing a rare kind word of appreciation towards Sasuke despite his unusually tumultuous thoughts at the moment. This was a very strange situation he found himself in, sitting bare naked together with the guy he hated most in the bath. That damn kiss back at the Academy made things even more awkward too in Naruto's opinion; he had a hard enough time of looking Sasuke in the eye as it was after that encounter without the extra weirdness of them both being in the nude. Sitting together naked with the guy he had kissed. His biggest rival. And they were both buck naked right now. Naruto couldn’t get over how weird this all was for him. He just wasn’t used to being so… uh, ‘open’ with other people, so the unusual situation was definitely making him feel pretty self-conscious and tense right about now.

"Sure," Sasuke replied simply, almost sounding uninterested, like saving Naruto from colliding into the ground had been only a passing thought to him. If he thought this situation was strange, he certainly didn't show it. He merely continued on with cleaning himself, pouring a bucket full of water over his head and rinsing out the soapy suds from his thick, dark locks.

Naruto sure was relieved Sasuke didn’t decide to gloat or make a big deal out of his words of thanks. The other day Naruto had wanted to show off how much his awesome tree climbing skills had progressed to Kakashi-sensei and Sakura, and okay, _maybe_ he had gotten a little bit too overconfident in his new ability. As he attempted to show off his footing had faltered and Naruto went plummeting out of a very tall tree and would have smacked right into the ground if not for Sasuke  darting up the tree to grab his ankle and save him from becoming a pancake flattened on the ground. Sure, it had been annoying to be saved by Sasuke again, but just this once Naruto decided to give the guy credit where it was due for royally saving his butt. Chalk the feeling up to teamwork.

After a few heavy silent moments between the teammates, Sasuke had finished his scrubbing and stood up from the stool, then unceremoniously slipped into the large tub next to Naruto, who shifted aside to make room for him. Sasuke slowly dipped his taut body into the tub, letting his overly sore muscles adjust to the soothing hot temperature of the water as it drained the tension from his young body. All the while, Naruto did his best to look away from his rival’s naked body and towards the wall; the only baths with other people he had ever taken were at the public bathhouse back in the Hidden Leaf Village, but the guys there all tended to avoid him and gave him a wide berth whenever he showed up, so it was a pretty solitary experience. He had no siblings or close friends to ever bathe along with either, so being in such a personal setting alone with just Sasuke was pretty unnerving for Naruto. He had never expected to have such an intimate and open occasion with Sasuke of all people.

Naruto's heart thumped loudly in his chest as Sasuke slowly sat down next to him in the deep pool of water, _badump, badump, badump._ It was so overpowering in his ears Naruto was surprised Sasuke couldn't hear his obvious nervousness as well. For some reason sitting like this, so exposed and open next to his rival, was making Naruto very anxious in a number of ways. Sasuke's eyes were shut tight as he leaned back, sinking his body down into the relaxing hot water and sighing with quiet relief, so thankfully he couldn't see just how much his presence was bothering Naruto. A light pink blush spread out across Naruto's face as his mind raced. A certain question was burning in his head, screwing up all reasonable and rational thoughts with its dominating curiosity.

_Should I look?_ he pondered, asking himself a question so far out of the ream of normal that it was almost certifiably insane. _No, no! That's creepy, don't do that_ , Naruto quickly corrected his repulsive voyeuristic urges with indignant fear. _...But still, I am pretty curious how I compare._ Naruto continued to tensely stare at the wall, debating if he should take a look over at Sasuke’s nude form. Naruto had never seen another guy's ‘thing’ before, so he was filled with a natural, if dangerous, curiosity. He wanted to know what other guys looked like down there: was he bigger or smaller than they were? Did he have more or less hair? How did his own penis look compared to those of other boys his age? Naruto was filled with the kind of insatiable curiosity about his own growing body and how it compared with others that boys starting puberty often got. The desire to learn more about his changing body had hit him as Naruto had recently entered puberty, a bundle of new hairs coming in all over the place in little patches and his penis had noticeably grown in size as well, becoming somewhat longer and girthier than it had been before. With no father, brother, or friends to discuss the tumultuous changes with–asking Iruka about it would have been _way_ too embarrassing to handle–Naruto realized now might have been his only chance to learn just how he stacked up with the competition. And who better to compete with at this than Sasuke, his eternal rival? On the _other_ hand, taking a look at another naked guy seemed just too strange to even begin to think seriously about. What kind of weirdo peeked at other guys in the bath? This situation was already awkward enough to deal with as it was. Inner turmoil tore his opinions in two: to look or not to look?

_...Hmm, I guess there’s nothing wrong with just taking a tiny peek, right?_ Naruto finally decided after much internal debate. Just one quick look at Sasuke’s junk would be enough to satisfy his curiosity, just to see how he measured up. It was only a simple reconnaissance mission, after all information was power to a ninja. Naruto carefully leaned over slightly closer to Sasuke, keenly aware of his dangerous position. The last thing he would want was Sasuke opening his eyes only to find Naruto staring intently down at his crotch. He would surely be dubbed a pervert and a weirdo for life if he was discovered! Through the clear water Naruto could plainly see Sasuke's foreskin covered boyhood bobbing in the water, floating above his nearly hairless testicles and accompanied by a handful of jet black hairs growing above the young member in a short, fuzzy patch.

_What, he’s bigger than me!? Damn you, Sasuke!_ Naruto fumed in frustrated disappointment as he was unintentionally one-upped by his rival yet again, comparing Sasuke’s penis to his own flaccid member in his mind. They looked similar, both with foreskins pulled around the tips and vaguely the same shape, except Sasuke’s was a bit longer and Naruto’s was a tad thicker around. They also had roughly the same amount of pubes clustered together–only a small forest of bushy hair on each boy, since they were still young and had much maturing to do from here–though Sasuke’s dark black hairs were more visible standing out against his pale skin than Naruto’s little light blond forest of pubes were on his darker skin tone.

Naruto leaned in just a tiny bit closer, looking back and forth between his own penis and Sasuke’s, studying their differences and mentally measuring them again to make sure he hadn’t miscalculated in his mental measurements. Nope, Sasuke was definitely the longer one Naruto finally relented–though not all that willingly–after about the fifth time of comparing cocks with his rival.

As he leered at Sasuke’s private parts Naruto also couldn’t help but notice as his eyes wandered over Sasuke’s form that the dark-haired boy was more muscled than he was, likely a byproduct of his rigorous training. Now that he thought about it, in this light Sasuke actually seemed to be pretty good looking, his features all smooth, handsome, and complimentary. Maybe that was why all the girls in the Leaf Village had a thing for him? Because he had a nice body to go along with his pretty boy face, despite his lousy personality? The light muscle lines on his abs made Naruto jealous; he wasn't as well-built as Sasuke was. Those muscles were still young and undeveloped, but Naruto thought their overall appearance looked more attractive and manly, more grown up than his own body did. Perhaps he should lay off eating so much ramen for a while and train harder to get a body like that? Naruto’s eyes inadvertently washed over that body, he just couldn’t resist himself from soaking in this rare blatantly open visage of his rival; those strong muscular arms, the powerful leg muscles, his inquisitive eyes then tracing an invisible line from Sasuke’s pale neck down to the two remarkably pink nipples standing out starkly against the creamy skin of his abs and pecs, on to the boy’s taut stomach where just a few dark hairs were coming in beneath his navel signifying the beginnings of what would one day be a treasure trail leading south, and here Naruto’s eyes drifted further downward as well, back down to the thing that had started his gawking in the first place… He hated to admit it, but even Naruto had to agree that Sasuke _was_ a pretty handsome guy after this thorough examination of his rival.

While he was busy secretly ogling Sasuke a strange but familiar burning feeling rose up inside Naruto. An excited, lusty emotion that he had been growing more accustomed to as of late suddenly overcame him and he soon realized that his own member had begun to rise and stiffen, poking out of the water defiantly. _What the hell?! No, no, no, no, no! Stop doing that!_ Naruto berated his own penis inside his head. If Sasuke saw him like this it would be a thousand times worse than if he caught Naruto peeking! If Sasuke caught him sitting there staring at him with a hard-on Naruto would be killed for sure!

Seeing an opportune washcloth hanging on the side of the tub he snatched it up lightning quick and covered his crotch with the rag, desperate to hide his predicament from the teammate sitting just inches away from him. _No waaaay! This isn't because of Sasuke_ , Naruto assured himself in a total panic at his over the top physical reaction to a remarkable visual stimuli. _I'm just tired and it's been awhile since I took care of it so my brain is just being weird. That's it!_ There was no way, no damn way, that he had gotten hard looking at Sasuke. Because of their current mission, because he was always together with his team 24/7 now, Naruto just hadn’t found a good opportunity to be alone and masturbate in a long while, so the stress was building up in his little body. Growing boys needed time to be alone and let off some steam, so to say, and Naruto had no free opportunity to do so in a long time. Any guy would get an unwanted boner or two if put in that same situation. That was definitely all this was, there was nothing more behind it. _Go down! Please go down!_ he begged his member urgently, but it paid him no mind and continued standing proudly at attention.

"Is something wrong?" Sasuke questioned, opening his eyes to see what was going on after hearing and feeling all the water rapidly sloshing around in the bathtub created by Naruto's sudden rapid movements to contain his embarrassment.

"Nope! Everything's just fine! Heh heh," Naruto nervously chucked perhaps a little too eagerly, shying away from Sasuke by leaning his whole body as far away from the boy as Naruto possibly could and nervously averting his gaze as Sasuke questioned him, desperately trying to hide his throbbing erection behind the thin camouflage of the washcloth. Sasuke just raised an eyebrow at the blond ninja’s weird reactions and shook his head in confusion, thankfully not noticing his teammate’s poorly concealed boner.

_Argh, what the hell is with me lately?! I keep doing weird things… all because of Sasuke…_ Memories of that time he had impulsively kissed a Shadow Clone of Sasuke flashed in his head as Naruto tried to contain his uncooperative erection. Why the hell had he done that, what weird thoughts had compelled him to do such a stupid thing? It wasn’t something he should have done, but he unfortunately had done it and now it was seriously messing with Naruto’s head. Regret and shame poured off of him for his unusual actions. And on top of that, now _this_ was happening, despite him not entirely wanting it to… Weird actions and thoughts kept happening to him whenever Sasuke was involved. Naruto tried to convince himself otherwise, that it was just his newly pubescent hormones running wild and that there was nothing odd going on at all, but as Sasuke stood up and got out of the tub to dry off Naruto found himself compelled to take a covert look out the corner of his eyes, couldn't help but stare at the two toned mounds of the boy’s butt as beads of water dripped down those firm, pale posterior muscles. ...Something was seriously strange with Naruto's head lately. _It's all because of that damn kiss, now I keep thinking crazy things…_ That stupid accidental kiss back at the Academy had set off a bizarre series of events that Naruto just couldn’t escape anymore. Naruto grumbled bashfully as he gripped the cloth tightly to cover his rock-hard erection, his face now a deep crimson as he sunk back into the water to blow more bubbles of frustration.

***

The air was so frigid it stung Sasuke’s skin and chilled his lungs as he tried his best to dodge the attacks coming from every direction. Dozens of cuts covered his body, wounds inflicted by the storm of needles thrown at him by the rogue ninja Haku. Many of the wounds were only superficial scrapes and cuts, but they still burned with pain in the open exposure to the icy air. Being surrounded on all sides by the masked boy’s Crystal Ice Mirrors–and on top of that being inside a thick, dense cloud of fog created by his partner Zabuza’s own Hidden Mist Jutsu–gave this bridge an eerie, heavy atmosphere and made this battle seem like it was some strange, hypnotic dream. But the pain of being pierced by those long stabbing needles over and over again as he and Naruto tried to find a way out of their icy prison was all too real. The image of Haku shifting from mirror to mirror as he attacked Sasuke and Naruto, always too fast for them to catch, was a mystifying, unnerving sight. Again and again Sasuke and Naruto tried to force their way out of the jutsu, but to no avail, and each time they tried to escape they were stopped by Haku and forcibly pushed back into this nightmare house of mirrors. Haku was just too lightning quick to pin down and deal with effectively. The glimmering ice mirrors stood like imposing fortress walls, barring them passage outside as the boys futilely tried to bust their way out of their containment.

That stupid Naruto. Sasuke was so frustrated with him at the moment that he swore when they made it out of this mess he would give that loser a good clobbering for being so reckless. He always had to be the big hero trying to save the day and _always_ ended up in trouble because of it. That loudmouthed show-off just had to go and mess things up and now he was stuck in here with Sasuke as punishment for his rashness. That moron had run into the jutsu’s area of effect to come ‘save’ Sasuke, and now they both were stuck in here getting toyed with by the masked assassin as needles plunged into their bodies from every which way. So what if Naruto had good intentions in trying to help Sasuke? It was more important to use your brain over your feelings while in battle, something Naruto just didn’t understand. It had been a massively stupid move on his part, considering how much easier a dual attack on Haku from both sides would have been for them, but Naruto’s courage and determination to assist a teammate in a bad situation weren’t something Sasuke was exactly faulting or looking down on at the moment. It was even admirable in a way, a definite change for the better from his previous attitude, a sentiment that even Sasuke couldn’t completely overlook… Sasuke was still going to beat that idiot up for getting them into this mess, though. They could have been spared all this trouble if only Naruto had used his peanut brain to think things out rationally. That idiot only even thought with his heart or his stomach.

Even if Sasuke was starting to catch on to the timing of Haku’s movements and been able to scorch the rogue shinobi with his Fireball Jutsu, the two imprisoned boys’ chakra wouldn’t last forever and they were starting to be worn down by Haku’s relentless blitz attacks from all sides. Unless they did something soon it would only be a matter of time until they lost this fight. Naruto was already exhausted from using too much of his chakra, struggling to even stay conscious anymore let alone fight, and Sasuke was barely hanging on trying to simultaneously defend himself and at the same time trying to keep his weary teammate from getting any more wounded than he already was. Naruto could barely stand on his feet as it was, forcing Sasuke to roughly shove him out of the way of the barrages of needles as they rained down on them. It may not exactly have been gentle treatment, but it was the only way to protect him at the moment; survival took priority over being nice. In order to win against this dangerous foe they would need to team up and work together again, but… It was just too late for that anymore. After many failed attempts at escape Naruto had reached his limits and had finally collapsed as his weary legs gave way and he passed out from the great strain on his body. The boy just had nothing in himself left to give. The pain and the effort were simply too much for him to bear anymore and Naruto slipped out of consciousness, sprawled out into a heap on the ground.

Sasuke felt himself beginning to wane as well. Slowly but surely he was being pushed back. Bit by bit he was weakening as his strength was draining away with each attack from Haku. But there was one last thing to use, one last trump card in his arsenal. Sasuke focused intently on Haku’s movements, determined to not miss even the slightest muscle twitch. When Haku threw another stream of needles towards his prey, Sasuke grabbed hold of Naruto’s unconscious body under his arm, activated his trump card, and swiftly moved out of the way with near-miraculous timing. Though the technique wasn't perfected yet, Sasuke’s use of his Sharingan, his inheritance as an Uchiha, had saved both himself and Naruto this time, but he couldn’t rely on its chakra draining power forever. Eventually Sasuke would run out of energy as well and when he did that would be it for them. He dropped Naruto back down and readied himself for another round of assaults, desperately focusing on the battle and not his pressing thoughts of possible defeat. His keen eyes tracked Haku as he leapt from mirror to mirror, preparing for what Sasuke knew would be the assassin’s last all out attack, one more move to try and finish this battle once and for all.

Haku surged forward out of his mirror like a bolt of lightning, ready to strike with deadly intent, and Sasuke prepared his own defence and counterattack. But Sasuke suddenly realized in horror that _he_ wasn’t the one being targeted at all; the intended victim for Haku’s attack was Naruto, who was passed out and unable to defend himself; in that state it would be a simple thing for Haku to remove him from this fight _permanently_. The masked boy blew right past Sasuke, ignoring him for the moment and blazing fast towards Naruto as he sliced through the air intent on striking the easier target first and dealing the collapsed boy a final fatal blow.

_Damn! He’s aiming for Naruto!_ Sasuke reacted in surprise, not thinking that the assassin would make a strike at Naruto; a tragic mistake to make. _I have to… I have to save him! Please let me make it in time!_ Sasuke uttered as a silent plea and propelled himself forward as quick as he could, uncaring at what would happen next, strangely unconcerned with whatever harm could befall himself. Haku was jetting towards Naruto so swiftly he could barely be seen. If Sasuke didn't make it in time… _No, don’t think about that, just move it!_ he demanded himself, pushing his tired body to its limits for this single purpose. After everything that had happened, after all his idiot rival had put him through, Sasuke couldn’t just sit back and let Naruto get killed. He didn’t understand his own motivations for doing so, it made no sense to him. It wasn’t like they were friends, nor did he particularly care about Naruto, but his body moved before he had the chance to think about it. Sasuke sprung into action before he even realized he was moving, all on instinct and the desire to save that loser teammate of his. Subconsciously, something inside Sasuke didn’t want to see him get hurt, some part of himself desired to protect Naruto right here and now regardless of the risks to his own life. If he failed… then Naruto would surely die. He didn’t want to see another person fade from existence right in front of him. Sasuke didn’t want to experience that kind of feeling ever again, to feel so useless, to be left so empty and helpless as he failed to prevent more deaths right in front of his eyes. Not again! _Never_ again! If Naruto died here, even if he won out over Haku in the end, Sasuke knew he would never be able to forgive himself. He knew he had to save Naruto no matter what the cost. Sasuke could only remark astoundedly on how unlike himself his current thoughts and actions were as he leapt in front of the oncoming projectiles.

***

Naruto lay crumpled in a heap on the stone bridge, utterly stunned at the sight before him. He couldn’t believe it. This couldn’t be happening. The image of Sasuke’s back was all he saw as he stared up in horrified confusion. Those broad shoulders that had moved into the trajectory of Haku’s deadly weapons in order to shield him from their menacing sharpened tips took up the entirety of Naruto’s field of vision. Sasuke had taken a barrage of needles that had been coming his way, stepped willingly into the path of the attack to prevent Naruto from getting harmed. A mess of the needles were jammed into nearly every part of his body, jutting painfully out of Sasuke's arms, legs, even piercing through his neck. Blood trickled out dozens of puncture holes scattered across his body, joining together with the little streams of blood formed by all his previous injuries. The whole sight was positively frightening, Naruto trembling with fear and disbelief at that terrible image before him.

“Why? Why would you save me!?” Naruto shouted at his unexpected guardian. “I never asked you to save me!” he screamed out in bewildered frustration. He just couldn’t comprehend it; why would Sasuke of all people do something like this? The same Sasuke that mocked him, the same jerk that he always argued with relentlessly, the same person that Naruto constantly strove to prove his strength to and desperately wanted approval from. Why would that guy go so far for him?

Naruto realized that it had happened again. Sasuke had saved him from trouble yet again. Once again Sasuke had protected him and Naruto had been useless. But this time… this time was entirely different from all the rest. This was just awful. On this occasion Naruto felt no annoyance or irritation or drive to do better next time. There was only a great sense of confusion and shock. Why would Sasuke do this? Why would he sacrifice himself for Naruto’s sake?

“I hated you, but… I don’t know why, my body just moved on it’s own…” Sasuke gasped out as an explanation as he tottered unsteadily on his feet and tears of pain welled up in his eyes, then he suddenly plummeted backwards, causing Naruto to lunge forward to catch the grievously wounded boy in his arms. Sasuke’s face was exceedingly pale and his skin was noticeably beginning to lose its warmth. _I hated you too, but… But I didn't want something like this to happen!_ Naruto cried out in his head, but he was too dumbstruck to speak his thought aloud. His mind just couldn’t comprehend these events. This had to have been a bad dream.

Cradled in Naruto’s arms, Sasuke went on to mention his quest to kill his brother in a strained, raspy voice, but after that he said something exceedingly odd. “Naruto… Don’t let your dream die, too…” he pleaded with Naruto not to perish here with him as well, to keep his dream of becoming Hokage alive. He was almost being… encouraging and supportive. Like Sasuke wanted his last breaths to mean something, to say something important in his final moments to push Naruto forward. As if his spirit would be the guide to that dream. How strange it was that his final words were ones that were kind and not accusing ones full of resentment. How odd that Sasuke was so unusually open as he made his dying declaration, forcing Naruto to become his last witness. After Sasuke had said this one final thing to Naruto he became quiet as his eyes gently fluttered closed and his body went limp in Naruto’s arms. _Stop. Stop talking. I don’t want to hear these things. I don’t understand what you’re saying. ...Please don’t go. I still have to show you how strong I am. Why would you do this? I just don’t get it. Why?!_

Naruto couldn’t die here. Just like Sasuke had said, he had a dream, something he needed to accomplish no matter what. That was why he kept fighting back, even though it seemed pointless to resist against Haku’s superior skills as a shinobi. But he couldn’t give up on it, _especially_ not now. Surely Sasuke had a dream too, something he desired in his heart more than anything in the world. He must have had things he wanted to do with his life all the same. But now… Now he would never get to.

Small, bitter tears dripped from out Naruto’s eyes down his cheeks. He tightened his grip around Sasuke’s arms, clutching his teammate’s ragged body closer to his own, refusing to believe that his comrade was really dead. Haku talked on, commenting on Sasuke’s sacrifice, about how Sasuke found the strength to protect a certain person who was important to him even knowing what would happen to him by doing so, and how the life of a ninja was full of pain and sacrifice, but all this was just muttered noise to Naruto, distant and unclear. All he could focus on was his dead comrade resting in his arms, his wet eyes staring down disbelievingly at the now motionless body of his rival. The boy’s skin was pure white, like freshly fallen snow, and his body was just as shockingly cold. He didn’t budge an inch, he wasn’t breathing, he had no pulse. It didn’t seem possible, but Sasuke really was gone. Naruto half expected Sasuke to suddenly open his eyes and launch a string of insults his way, telling Naruto how useless he was and to focus on the battle at hand. But he didn’t. His body remained lifeless and unmoving. This was too unreal. Someone important? What kind of garbage was that? He wasn’t important to Sasuke. No way. There was just no way that was true. They hadn't been friends, they didn't even get along, but still… _Sasuke is a big show off and he can’t say anything nice to me even if his life depends on it. He’s a smug jerk and he’s mouthy and stubborn, too. But still… But he still didn’t deserve to die!_

“Shut up,” Naruto warned Haku in a voice even icier and sharper than Haku's jutsu as the masked boy talked on, sick of his lecturing and meaningless words in this heart-wrenching moment. Something inside him had broken, been twisted and snapped in his sense of abrupt loss. Naruto’s grief quickly evolved, it morphed into an intense anger that burned red hot inside him. He felt changed, overcome by a relentless, uncontrollable wave of pure hatred towards the person who had killed his teammate, that bastard rival who had sacrificed himself for Naruto.

“I won't forgive you! I'll kill you!” a fierce, unfamiliar voice from deep inside himself rang out as Naruto furiously charged at the masked boy, intent on paying him back in full for the life he had snuffed out. Naruto became a bestial figure, transformed into an entity that was fueled by pure hate, changed into an animalistic form of true power. There were no more tears, only bloodlust and unrelenting rage, the desire to completely crush and annihilate Haku in a terrifying rampage of destruction. Sasuke had had his own dreams. He had a goal, a personality, a team, a home, a life. And now he had _nothing_. Naruto’s rage induced inner demon would make sure that just like Sasuke, Haku would lose all these things too, that he would claim bloody vengeance for his fallen comrade. The incredible power of the Nine Tails was unleashed in a terrifying blast of desperate fury and mourning.

***

Naruto stared solemnly at the lifeless body of the once fierce demon ninja Zabuza, who had slain his former employer, the corrupt tyrant Gato and finally fallen under the hail of swords of Gato’s hired henchmen. As he did so, Sakura’s sudden shout from behind him startled Naruto and roused him from his sullen thoughts of the two now deceased Hidden Mist assassins, who perhaps weren't as evil as they first seemed. What she so happily yelled out to him… It couldn’t have been true. He had watched Sasuke die, felt the energy ebb away from his body. That loss had sent him into such a fury that Naruto had very nearly killed Haku in retaliation.

But sure enough, just as she had so joyously cried out at him, when he turned around Naruto saw plainly that Sasuke was standing on his feet, perhaps battered and exhausted, but luckily still alive. The wounded boy weakly raised his hand at Naruto in acknowledgment. Naruto laughed slightly as tears of joy welled up in his eyes. _He's okay. He's really still alive_ , he reassured himself of the realness the sight before him. An overwhelming sense of relief descended on him, the fear and worry and horrible sadness he had experienced after Sasuke’s supposed death now replaced by a sense of calm gratitude for his comrade’s safety.

***

Even a few days after the savage battle with Haku and Zabuza on the unfinished bridge, Naruto still refused to leave Sasuke's side while he was recovering from his wounds. Kakashi and Sakura had both tried many times to lure him away, assuring him that Sasuke would be alright, but Naruto adamantly refused each time, vigilantly watching over his slumbering teammate like a protective mother hen. Naruto spent all day waiting next to his side and slept on a futon close beside his at night as well, almost as if he was afraid that if he left then Sasuke would disappear, like the boy really had perished in that battle and this was only an illusion, afraid that the only thing keeping him alive now was Naruto’s constant presence. Sasuke spent most of the days sleeping away in Tazuna’s house, resting up his weary body and healing his terrible wounds, while Naruto sat not so patiently next to him. Naruto was bored out of his mind with nothing to do all the while but think, but he was still unwilling to leave his teammate's side, dutifully keeping watch over Sasuke in case he needed help changing his bandages or walking to the bathroom or something. Naruto thought he owed it to Sasuke to watch over him after Sasuke had saved him from being impaled by all those needles. Sasuke had actually been willing to give up his own life in order to protect Naruto’s, he had so carelessly and uncharacteristically acted in his defence. Of course, Naruto obviously knew that being next to Sasuke wouldn’t affect his healing at all, that there was no real reason for him to continue be there, but for some reason he still wanted to be in that spot, beside the jerk that had saved him. This was the least he could do to repay his rival.

_I was really worried. I was so sure he was dead._ When those vicious needles had stabbed through Sasuke and he had turned so ghostly white, so cold, so lifeless and limp in Naruto’s arms… Even now after a few days distance from them it was still upsetting to remember those vivid images. Naruto recalled how overcome with grief and rage he had felt after that pivotal moment. The fear, the guilt, the shock, so many unexpected emotions coalescing into a storm of anger and vengeance. He had never expected himself to feel that way, especially not over Sasuke; he had always been the bitter rival, the foe to overcome and triumph over, not someone to worry about and desire to watch over and feel compelled to avenge.

As his days of guard duty over Sasuke’s exhausted form went on, Naruto began to realize that his feelings when it came to Sasuke were much more muddled than he would have cared to admit. And he also realized his thoughts about Sasuke were completely contradictory sometimes… But maybe that was okay. On one hand he was a smug, annoying jackass who just loved to insult Naruto, but on the other hand there were times when a less abrasive, more tolerable Sasuke poked through his usual tough demeanor, like when Sasuke had shared his food back when they first became genin and when he helped Naruto get back to Tazuna’s house after they had had a hard day of competing at walking up trees. Sometimes Sasuke actually seemed not so bad. After these occasions Naruto had now started to wonder if maybe it really was possible to work together with Sasuke. Maybe he really could be able to truly trust someone else besides only Iruka-sensei. Naruto didn’t know if it was by fate or by chance or whatever the circumstances had been, but right now he was glad to be Sasuke’s teammate, thankful that they had ended up working together as comrades. The boy didn’t care anymore about the why behind it, only that he was together with a dependable, trusting team. Sure they fought a lot and didn’t get along all that well or have many things in common, but maybe with some work that could all change too. Teamwork was hard and frustrating and sometimes it was frightening, but it was definitely worth it in the end.

Naruto still wanted to prove himself to the dark-haired boy of course, to make Sasuke start respecting his efforts and determination, but after all that had happened Naruto understood there was some kind of invisible connection between them that couldn’t be denied anymore, both of them linked together by this remarkable, devastating, changing series of events on this outing that was supposed to be an ordinary C-ranked mission and turned out to be anything but. Naruto still didn’t understand that connection completely, couldn’t describe how exactly he felt about Sasuke or just what their relationship was anymore. Sometimes, it was true, he would like nothing more than to kick the overconfident boy’s ass and was frustrated and irritated by him like no other, but Naruto was stunned how often good thoughts of Sasuke had starting passing through his mind since they had teamed up. After all, how could he not think at least a little bit positively about the guy who had saved him from certain death? Even if Sasuke was a big jerk a lot of the time, Naruto believed there had to be a good side to him buried deep down somewhere in him trying to get out. If there wasn’t then Sasuke would have just let Naruto get killed and fought Haku by himself, Naruto knew that much. So maybe like the way that Naruto didn’t completely hate Sasuke, perhaps Sasuke also didn’t loathe Naruto as much as he claimed to. But whatever their true relationship, whatever kind of ties that bound them together for whatever reasons, there was now a bond between them–faint and tenuous, but still noticeable–that Naruto was thankful for. He had spent too much of his life alone, he needed these new connections he had formed. He was glad to be on Team 7, glad to have a place at last where he felt like he belonged.

Naruto sat staring down at the boy carelessly slumbering away on a futon just next to his own, watching Sasuke’s chest reassuringly rise and fall slowly as he quietly snored, resting his broken body. _He looks so peaceful right now. Definitely better than when he's calling me an idiot_ , Naruto laughed to himself, noting how unexpectedly calm and serene Sasuke looked in his sleep, almost like a whole different person. Naruto’s eyes locked intently on Sasuke's partially open lips as he breathed softly in and out then in again… Those same lips that he had inadvertently kissed way back before they had been assigned to work together. That seemed so long ago now with all that had happened on this mission, so many unpredicted events occurring, so many unexpected emotions flooding into Naruto during his first real outing from the Leaf Village. Those soft pink lips seemed to beckon to him, telling him that everything was alright, that there was still a strong will to live left in Sasuke’s body. Naruto suddenly found himself recalling the way that first accidental kiss had made him feel: disgusted on the outside, but inwardly, buried deep down underneath his revulsion, it had felt… good. Confusing and annoying and definitely not bad at all.

He _had_ to do it again. Just once more to satisfy his curiosity would be enough. Naruto had to know what it felt like with the real deal and not just with a clone. He needed to know what a _real_ kiss felt like, not just an accidental one, but one that actually meant something. No matter how revolting the thought, no matter how conflicted the feelings, right now Naruto wanted to feel that odd, stomach twisting power of connection to Sasuke just one more time.

Acting on rash impulse, but still wary of waking Sasuke, Naruto carefully leaned down, hovering over the sleeping boy’s face for a moment as he appreciated Sasuke's peaceful features, then planted a quick, light peck on Sasuke's mouth ever so softly. He didn't know why he did it, why he was so curious to feel their lips touch once again considering how confused and tangled up inside the previous kiss had made him, how much agonizing he had done over that one little kiss. Something about the act just felt right, as if it were the only correct thing to do in this situation. It was like something compelled him to do it. This tiny, cautious kiss wasn't anything like the accidental first kiss in the Academy classroom–forceful and exciting and unexpected–but also wasn't hollow and empty like his kiss with the Shadow Clone had been, either. It was gentle, warm, full of conflicting, confusing emotions Naruto had no idea how to label or name.

“Just what do you think you’re doing, loser?” Sasuke called out softly with his eyes still closed, scaring the living daylights out of Naruto, who leapt back from the prone boy and prepared himself for Sasuke's inevitable wrath. Naruto was crouched down in a defensive position, readying himself to have the everliving snot beaten out of him.

“N-nothing! Nothing at all!” Naruto rapidly stammered out. He couldn't think of any good excuse or explanation at the moment. What could he possibly say, ‘I slipped’? That wasn’t believable at all in this situation. He had done something ridiculously stupid and crazy and now Naruto had to face the unfortunate consequences for his actions.

“Right,” Sasuke replied, sounding completely and understandably unconvinced. “Well, if you want to do 'nothing' again make sure I'm awake before you do it. Kissing a sleeping person is really weird, you know?” Sasuke declared, his eyes still remaining closed and a weak but wiseass smirk growing on his face.

...Naruto's mind must have completely overloaded, because to him it sounded like Sasuke just said it was actually okay to do it again. Was this some kind of trick? Or had Sasuke become delirious with sickness? Cautiously testing his luck, Naruto nervously placed his palm on Sasuke's cheek, cradling it gently in his hand. It was so warm to the touch, relievingly different from the last time he had touched Sasuke’s bare skin. Perhaps Sasuke was still running a bit of a fever; his face was splotchy and red and he was sweating a bit after all. Naruto reminded himself that he would have to ask Kakashi to get Sasuke some more medicine later.

“Sasuke,” Naruto called out softly to the boy lying below him. His partner opened his eyes after hearing his name, staring up at Naruto without any of the usual hard-edged look in his eyes. He seemed almost appreciative for once, unusually tame and tolerable. “I'm really glad you're okay,” Naruto told him plainly, his voice cracking slightly at the memory of Sasuke's body lying motionless with all those needles stuck in him, that remembrance almost causing him to cry again, even though he knew Sasuke was safe now. _Don’t die, you jackass. Not for me. I don’t want that_ , Naruto berated Sasuke in his head, but couldn’t work up the courage to say it aloud. There was no way he would let something like this ever happen again. Naruto was too proud to let Sasuke continue to save him and show him up anymore, he would continue to compete against that bastard until Naruto beat him single-handedly and earned his respect, but also… They were too connected to just let Sasuke throw his life away for him again. Naruto would get stronger so that Sasuke never had to put himself in that position again, so that he didn’t have to rely on Sasuke anymore. Naruto would _never_ allow Sasuke to toss his dreams and hopes and everything else away like it was all nothing again. After all, wasn’t that also part of being a team; supporting each other’s dreams and protecting each other’s lives? Wasn’t that what was most important?

“Hn,” Sasuke merely grunted in response to Naruto’s statement, unable or unwilling to say anything at the moment. He merely continued staring up eye to eye with his loser squadmate, into those remarkably blue orbs that looked so worriedly down at him. His calm demeanor assured Naruto that, at least for now, everything was alright between them. The moment was unusually peaceful for the two boys who rarely did anything other than shout and fight with each other, enveloping them like a warm, gentle summer breeze.

Sasuke had said it was alright. So Naruto impulsively decided was going to do it again and damned be the consequences! Naruto knew it was weird and that he would regret it later, but oh well, at this moment he would let his impulses take control and deal with all that afterwards. Naruto leaned in close again and fearlessly planted another bold kiss onto Sasuke's lips. This time, Sasuke went along with the movements, accepting Naruto's attempt completely as their lips brushed together in quiet relief. Naruto was learning quickly that there were many different kinds of kisses, all with different meanings and emotions and intents behind them; this kiss was the most passionate one of all. If he and Sasuke were on better terms he might have even called it a caring kiss, a loving kiss, as pleasant and warm as it was. As it stood though, things would likely return to normal all too soon, with the two of them constantly competing for supremacy and a stream of insults coming from the mouth Naruto was pressed up against. But right now? Right now was perfect the way it was.


	2. That Jerk On My Team/That Loser On My Team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke have to deal with all the new awkwardness and tension between them following their unexpected actions during the mission to the Land of the Waves. Except that the way they deal with it ends up making the boys' already murky, rapidly changing relationship even more confusing and... dangerously physical.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty descriptively adult, either a Mature or Explicit rating depending on where your own personal bar for that stuff is set, so just a fair warning. No actual sex, but some dirty daydreams while Naruto browses through a porno mag when a beautiful black haired women in the magazine reminds him of a certain someone he knows. But he can't exactly stop once he's already started, can he?

It had become sort of a ritual for him, a set routine that Naruto now performed every time he came home from a mission. Upon arriving back at the Hidden Leaf Village he would first of all head to Ichiraku Ramen for a good meal. There was nothing better than a hot, filling bowl of ramen–of maybe five–as a reward for completing a tough mission. Taking a shower to relax and clean up, sneaking in a much needed nap, catching up on his favorite TV shows, all that could wait. Satisfying his ravenous hunger always came first and foremost for Naruto. Iruka-sensei would often show up at the shop as well if he wasn’t too busy with his own work and the two of them would chat about the details of the mission Naruto had just come back from or about his opinions on his teammates or whatever news was going around the village while they happily slurped their noodles together. Naruto sincerely appreciated his former sensei taking the time out of his schedule to hang out with him for this simple but important expression of friendly bonding between the teacher and the student; now that he busy with Team 7, Naruto didn’t get the chance to see that pesky but caring guy all that often anymore, so the boy did find himself getting a little lonely when away from his hometown, missing the almost fatherly presence of his former teacher that he had grown used to over the years a bit. It was nice to spend some quality one-on-one time with the nagging chunin once again. Besides, ramen definitely tasted better when you had someone important to enjoy it with.

And the second thing in this series of events that Naruto always did without fail upon returning home? Well, that was a lot more private than just eating a bowl of tasty ramen; after he was content and plump with food, Naruto then always headed directly back to his apartment to enjoy a little ‘personal time’ all to himself. Living the life of a ninja was tough enough as it was, but adding on top of that the rigors of being a hormone flooded near-teenager made things even more difficult to handle. For some reason missions tended to cause a build up of a lot of unwanted emotional and physical stress in Naruto; the endless training, bickering with his comrades, fighting difficult battles against strong foes, all of it was bound to wear down and aggravate even someone as full of energy as he was after a while. And the onset of puberty just wouldn’t leave Naruto alone either, plaguing him with embarrassing erections that happened for seemingly no reason and that sprung up out of the blue anywhere, anytime, accompanied by messy and humiliating wet dreams, and a fiery lust that Naruto had never felt before, an insatiable desire to learn more and experience more and see more of this new world beyond the door of his youthful innocence.

Thus the genin found himself under a constant two-pronged attack; two different–but equally frustrating–kinds of stress flooded Naruto’s maturing body, hidden behind a precarious dam of self-control. But even he had his limits with what pressures he could tolerate. The tension and irritation brought on by rigorous battle and training built up in Naruto’s pubescent muscles and mind, mixing together with his burning unrequited sexual desires, those growing waters of frustration held back temporarily by the dam of his own sheer willpower, desperately needing some kind of release, some way he could get rid of it all and reset the water levels to normal before he exploded. It had taken Naruto a while to figure out what to do with all this pent up frustration, how to effectively get rid of it all, but after a bit of curious experimentation one night, a little harmless fun exploring his newly pubescent body, he immediately knew he had found the perfect remedy for this ailment.

That was why after each and every successful mission, after first eating at Ichiraku with Iruka of course, Naruto would come home and take care of a _different_ kind of hunger. There was no better way to relieve his stress, no better finale to a job well done than coming home and stripping off all his clothes, pulling out a nudie magazine from its hiding place underneath his mattress, and having a nice long session to rub one out, a much needed experience of self-pleasure and a vital method of relaxation. It was the perfect solution to both of his problems, both of those types of unwanted and burdensome frustration welling up inside his body ready to spill over. By now jerking off after every mission had pretty much become habit, not so much something he wanted to do anymore, but something Naruto found he _needed_ to do; he needed to feel all the stress and tension–among other things–leave his body and be replaced with an overwhelming calm ecstasy, to have that weight lifted off his mind and body. By now that self-pleasuring had become a secret component of Naruto’s routine everyday life–eat a ton of food, make sure to find the time to jerk off, and then sleep it all off; it was a routine very typical to the average teenage boy. And now that he was back in the Leaf Village, tonight was no different than any other night.

It had been a number of agonizingly long weeks since Naruto had been able to adequately take care of his little problem; there was no alone time around his team at all, and even if there had been times out on missions when he _really_ wanted to pay his distracting erection some attention, felt the urge to indulge in his pleasures so damn badly, there was just never any decent amount of privacy to do it, no opportunity to run off and hide to show himself some love. Those weeks of needy but ignored sexual feelings in the Land of Waves quickly added up inside, agitating an already stressful situation and wearing on his nerves, making Naruto more irritable and impatient than was normal. He badly needed relief from the pressure and after going so long without getting any Naruto swore he could practically _feel_ all that unreleased sperm building up in his little balls, brimming for a release. Now that he was back from that long mission to the Land of Waves he finally had an opportunity to do the deed that teenage boys loved to do so much, and the blond genin was definitely looking forward to it.

There were many important things that Naruto needed to think about soon, many recent odd occurrences between himself and Sasuke that should have been plaguing his mind right now, a multitude of worries and fears and other things that all needed urgent addressing, but Naruto was just too worn out from the mission–not only physically, but also emotionally–to deal with all that right now. All that crazy stuff Naruto had done during the mission, getting so unexpectedly upset when he thought Sasuke had died protecting him, randomly getting a boner while staring at Sasuke’s naked body in the bath, kissing the black haired boy so gently while he recovered from his wounds, Naruto decided he could put it off for one day and freak out about all that tomorrow. At the moment he was simply too tired and preoccupied to worry about that stuff, a belly full of his favorite ramen and his boyhood more than ready for a pleasurable workout after being ignored and neglected for so long. At the moment Naruto’s brain was swimming in an odd mixture of exhaustion and testosterone, the powerful concoction blocking out any worries for the time being. Now that he was finally back home, Naruto fully intended to indulge in his pleasures for a while, to temporarily put all his cares aside and enjoy the moment while it lasted, before he inevitably woke up from his lust drunken stupor and realized just how insane he had really acted on the last mission.

Even before he had arrived at his front door, Naruto could feel himself getting erect in anticipation for what was to come, his pants tenting out very obviously as his body expectantly awaited the pleasure it was about to experience. The genin’s dick was noticeably jutting out inside his trousers, eagerly scraping against the zipper as it stretched out its fabric prison, begging to be let free. _Hang on a sec, buddy,_ Naruto reassured his member to be patient, softly patting his bulge with a little chuckle; sometimes ‘Little Naruto’ seemed to have a mind of his own. Clearly Naruto’s mind and body were both very eager to begin already. It was certainly a good thing no one else was outside around his apartment complex at this time of night or else they would have seen the boy walking awkwardly about with a big tent in his trousers, his erection proudly announcing its presence for all to see.

Once he unlocked the door and walked inside his apartment, Naruto got down to business almost immediately, the preteen knowing he couldn’t wait even a second longer for this, rapidly stripping off his shirt and tossing it aside carelessly in the hall as he made his way to his bedroom. “Ahhh! I’ve been waiting for this all day,” the blond let out a pleased sigh as he unzipped his fly, finally allowing his boyhood to poke out from its suffocating confinement, then firmly took ahold of his rigid member in his hand and gave it a few slow, shallow tugs. Naruto was already at full mast just from the thought of finally being able to touch himself, his foreskin retracted all the way back with no assistance needed, exposing the pinkish head of his penis which was weeping small beads of pre-cum in expectant delight, showing just how badly he needed this.

Naruto touched a finger to the tip of his cock and rubbed it around gently, coating his fingertip with his own sticky pre and giggling a little at the pleasurable, almost tickling sensation as he softly massaged his sensitive tip, trying to coax even more of the clear juice out. After a few minutes of toying with his rock hard erection, Naruto pulled the finger away from his oozing hole, forming a long, thin string of viscous pre-cum connecting between his cock head and his finger, and he smiled a bit at the arousing sight; Naruto had only recently begun producing the clear liquid, so he was still getting used to the presence of the crystalline substance dripping out whenever he got turned on, but after a while he had actually started to find the liquid sort of fun to play with, enjoying seeing how much he could make himself leak out to use as a lube. After a little more work gently teasing himself, Naruto was finally content with the amount of slick, improvised lubricant that had gradually dribbled out from his excited boner and been smeared all over his hand. He then took a seat down on his bed and eagerly pulled off his pants and underwear and kicked the now unneeded clothing off onto the floor, leaving the horny genin stark naked in the cool night air circulating throughout his room. That air would be heating up very soon here, though.

Naruto reached his hand–the one not covered in his sticky excitement of course–in-between his mattress and box-spring with a kind of aroused glee, an excited grin growing on his face as he went searching for one of his most prized possessions and pulled it out from its hiding place. Clutched triumphantly in his hand was a pornographic magazine, page after page full of beautiful naked women. Naruto was obviously far too young to legally have something like this in his possession since he was still years too early to buy the forbidden material legitimately, but that didn't stop him for enjoying its explicit content. He didn’t have a helpful older brother or a connected friend who could sneak him pornography either, leaving the boy mostly in the dark on adult matters. That was at least until a couple of weeks before Team 7 had left for the Land of Waves.

All those weeks ago Naruto had gone to a local bookshop in town one day to check out the new manga releases, one of the hobbies he busied himself with since he didn’t have any friends to play and hang out with. The owner of that shop apparently was _not_ a fan of Naruto, though, the grumpy old man rudely forcing the reviled boy out of his store almost as soon as he had walked in the door, bombarding Naruto with a barrage of angry threats and shouts for no reason. So after getting yelled at, Naruto impulsively decided to get some revenge on the shopkeep, a little justice in exchange for his needlessly poor treatment. When the old man let down his guard and wasn’t paying attention anymore, Naruto quietly snuck back into the shop, intent on ‘borrowing’ the reading material that he had wished to purchase for himself fair and square before the mean old bag of bones had forcibly run him out like some kind of roaming wild animal. Of course, Naruto would have paid for the book had he only been given the chance, and the little prankster did feel bad for deciding to resort to stealing it, but it was ultimately the owner’s fault for treating him like trash when Naruto hadn’t even done anything wrong in the first place

While the old man was busy in back doing stock, Naruto carefully went skulking around the shop searching for a copy of the manga he liked, and that was when Naruto had spotted _it_ ; the nudie mags rack, those forbidden adult treasures, the final line separating boyhood and manhood, where all sorts of exciting wonders lay unexplored. The filthy magazines seemed to call out to Naruto, enticing him to come closer. His curiosity had just gotten the better of him and no matter what he tried Naruto found he couldn't resist their call. Naruto stood there in the shop staring blankly at the adult material for a long time before he finally worked up the courage to take a shy, tentative footstep closer to the dirty mags, looking around cautiously to ensure that no one saw him inching closer to the porno, but besides himself no one else had been in the shop. At that moment Naruto had felt so uncertain, so unusually indecisive if he really wanted to do it after all, to cross that last line into the unknown.

...But those covers, plastered with images of pretty women in such risque poses, barely clothed in skimpy outfits, so much of their sensuous skin showing plain as day… Naruto had never experienced that kind of curiosity boiling in his chest, he had never cared much for that kind of thing before, even as he heard other boys in his class whisper excitedly about naughty things like these magazines he still hadn’t paid them much mind. But at that moment the craving suddenly descended on him as he stared timidly at those captivating, intimidating front covers. The mystery of the female body was something Naruto had a growing interest in now, his hormones beginning to kick into overdrive as he began to leave childhood behind, some sort of switch flipped on inside his brain. So instead of taking the newest issue of the manga he liked, Naruto had gulped down his fear, nervously taken those last few steps towards that invisible off limits area surrounding the adult magazine rack, and swiped a random dirty mag from off the shelf. The deed now done and irrevocable, Naruto quickly fled the scene of his crime, bolting from the shop with his new ‘study guide’ grasped tightly in his hand as he ran home to discover what awaited him inside. Not once since then had the boy regretted that bold decision.

Naruto eagerly set the magazine down on his bed and flipped it open to a random page, promptly beginning to stroke himself to the lewd image, the growing heat in his loins begging to be released as he gripped his pre lubed hand around his cock and happily went to town jerking himself off. The sensations Naruto felt as he slid into his own wet, sticky hand, man were they ever amazing! The boy’s eyes soaked up the nude images before him greedily, these all too new glimpses of the female form further sparking the fire raging in his young loins.

“Wow!” he gasped in pleasure, eyeing the gorgeous woman on the page. She was probably in her mid-20’s, pretty and youthful and sexy, her smooth unblemished skin almost glowing as bright as her short-cut golden blonde hair. The woman’s firm, round breasts were large and plump–just the way Naruto discovered he liked them after much research comparing the bust sizes of the ladies in the magazine–her DD-sized set of knockers drooping down somewhat under all their beautiful weight. Yet despite their considerable size, her pair weren’t _overly_ big for her frame, the model’s curvy body still maintaining a nice proportionality even considering her large bust. Naruto imagined himself playing with those big lovely tits, speeding up the movements of his hand as it went rapidly gliding back and forth on his hard as steel cock while he formed a mental picture of himself fondling and squeezing the older woman's beautiful mounds of flesh in both his hands as further masturbation fodder. How soft those heavy breasts must have been, how amazing it would be to feel their weight in his palms.

But even more intensely exciting about the blonde woman than her delectable tits was the fact that she was sitting on the side of a bed with her legs spread wide open, blatantly exposing her luscious pink cunt for Naruto to see, which the horny young man more than willingly gawked at. Nothing was hidden from sight, everything was clearly on display, the blonde woman’s beautiful flower petal-like lips flared open and glistening with aroused wetness in a magnificently sexy display. The hot blonde babe was using her fingers to stretch her pussy even farther, opening her lips wider and exposing the delicate pinkness of her tight-looking entrance for her audience.

As he took in the magnificent sight, Naruto knew he had _definitely_ made a good choice in swiping this magazine, even if it had only been picked at random. Luck had certainly been on his side that day; the other couple of porno mags he had pilfered since that first occasion only showed nude breasts and always hid the lower parts under skimpy underwear or annoying black censor lines. In this magazine, the dirtiest of all the trio Naruto had been driven to steal by his insatiable teenage sex drive, everything was freely shown, even those absolutely forbidden parts of the female anatomy Naruto had never laid eyes on before he had gotten his hands on this wonderful gift from the gods. Even if it was just in a magazine, there was something so excitingly naughty about seeing that prohibited zone, the last frontier for a pubescent boy. It was a remarkable thing to Naruto to get his first good look at those tight, wet caverns, those amazing folds of a woman’s most intimate parts; the mystery and wonder of the nether regions was never lost on horny teenage boys.

Not wanting to come too fast and have his fun be over all too quickly, Naruto forcibly slowed his strokes down to a more easy to manage pace; he suddenly realized he had gotten far too caught up staring at the model’s exposed vagina, too excited at his glimpse of the female anatomy, so in order to not bust a nut just yet Naruto decided to turn to page with his free hand to keep himself going for as long as possible tonight, to sustain his pleasure until he could keep it in no longer. It was on to the next arousing image to wank to for him.

The woman on this page was strikingly beautiful, a petite black haired siren laying lazily on her side like she was calling out to onlookers, her lusty expression daring them to come closer as if insinuating they were unworthy to be in her presence. She was altogether different from the blonde on the last page, something separate entirely in her temperament and appearance; the previous lady could have fairly been called gorgeous or sexy, but this woman had some odd unspoken quality about her, a more subdued kind of beauty. She wasn’t in such a wildly compromising or overtly sexual position as the last woman, laying naked on a red velvet-lined couch propping her head up with one hand as she gazed beguilingly into the camera and her other hand residing down in-between her legs caressing her sex, yet the dark haired woman still maintained a delicate eroticism about her. The dark haired woman was teasing her own needs, her middle finger inserted deep all the way up to the knuckle in her moist hole while her thumb leisurely toyed with and massaged her clit, but somehow she actually seemed to be teasing the viewer more, like she was smugly saying ‘Yeah, I’m touching myself and you’re loving it!’ to all the men looking at her, taunting them with her salacious actions.

Her dark narrow eyes, small pursed lips, and long flowing locks gave the woman a strangely refined air about her, like she was an elegant princess or something like that, someone of remarkable upbringing and poise. This woman’s pear-sized breasts were smaller than Naruto typically liked–decent he supposed, but not mouth-wateringly large like the blonde babe’s practically cantaloupe-sized rack had been–but there was something so oddly compelling about her that Naruto was utterly charmed by her feminine wiles and just couldn’t bear to turn to the next page and forgo pleasuring himself to her slender, succulent visage. She held some sort of mysterious power over him, her beauty a weapon drawing the boy further in. The black haired woman’s expression was so gentle, so subtle and missable, yet it was simultaneously amazingly alluring and powerful, her barely noticeable smile and narrowed eyes staring deep into Naruto as if she knew the young man was touching himself to her image, like she was smugly holding the upper hand in their interactions and knew it, she plainly understood the power she held over him.

“Damn!” Naruto loudly groaned as he appreciated the woman’s features with lust filled eyes; her suggestive, coy smile so softly directed his way, her inky black hair draping down over her small, delicate shoulders like a cascading black waterfall, her cute dark pink nipples pointing out from her supple fist-sized breasts. She wasn’t exactly what Naruto would have considered his type before this, not really his idealized image of a sexy woman, but the more he stared at the short, dark haired little beauty the more Naruto realized there was some captivating quality about her that was intensely arousing, even more so than the previous model, and now that he was so readily enjoying himself, Naruto couldn’t imagine _not_ having a go to her seductive charm. How could he have ever been so dumb to pass her up? She might not have been his type before, but she just might well become his _favorite_ type after this. She was like a crafty spider and Naruto had been caught up in her web, prey drawn in willingly to the seductress to be devoured. Naruto tightened his grip, working himself faster as he looked over this raven haired beauty in all her mysterious magnificence. The boy’s desperate, breathy gasps reverberated through the warm air, overlaid by the rhythmic wet, slapping noise of skin on skin as Naruto hastily fisted his cock for the woman to see, letting her picture see just how worked up she was getting him and allowing himself be entirely controlled by her spell.

As he was furiously stroking himself, incredibly turned on by the black haired hottie before him, Naruto suddenly realized something unusual about the nude woman. This young, striking lady so elegantly pictured on the page reminded Naruto of someone. It was certainly an odd time for that thought to pop into his head, but the resemblance was almost uncanny, her features a curious match for… Who exactly? He couldn’t really think straight at the moment, his head drowning in a haze of testosterone and his hand too busy rapidly pumping his energetic young dick to care about the matter all that much, but she definitely seemed familiar in an odd sense and Naruto just couldn’t shake the sensation of deja vu. Small, almond shaped dark eyes, creamy smooth skin, and a head of thick, luxurious black hair. Those cunning eyes that seemed to challenge all who approached, that slight, pompous smile that hid many secrets, a body that was fine and flawless like a porcelain doll. Now that he thought about it, yeah, she looked just like…

_No! No fucking way!!_ Naruto silently screamed in terror, the person she reminded him of finally coming to mind all at once. He would have screamed out for real, only Naruto was so stunned at the revelation that his voice caught in his throat and couldn’t escape. Deeply alarmed at his vile thoughts, the horrid nauseous feeling that arose in his belly as that person invaded his brain at the worst possible time, Naruto immediately ceased his stroking all together and released his dick from his vice grip, too disgusted with _that bastard_ popping into his thoughts in his private moment to continue. Naruto roughly snatched the magazine up and hastily tossed it to the other end of the bed in pure anger and frustration, as if the book would further contaminate him if it were anywhere near him, taint his young mind with thoughts he certainly didn’t want to have. The book soared into the air away from Naruto like an abused bird, its pages flapping like wings momentarily before it slammed back down onto the bed with a crash. Why? Why had the black haired vixen betrayed him so badly when all he had shown her was love? How could she have possibly reminded Naruto of _that guy_?! Naruto couldn’t even think his name right now or else he might be sick!

No, no, no! This couldn’t be happening, not right now of all possible times! It was just his overactive imagination, surely! Okay, so maybe there were _some_ similarities between the two of them which had made Naruto temporarily confused, causing him to mistake a resemblance and forcing his… ‘preoccupied’ brain to recall someone he would never have normally thought about while jerking off. But even considering the physical resemblance between the striking raven haired woman and _him_ , there was definitely no competition at all, her characteristics far exceeding his! ... _No, not like that!_ Naruto quickly corrected himself, shaking his head wildly in stubborn defiance. If he put it in those terms, if he actually dared to compare them, then it almost sounded like Naruto actually thought _he_ was attractive. Naruto wasn’t going to allow himself to think that way again, not after that bizarre moment in Tazuna's bathroom in the Land of Waves! It was just so messed up! He had sworn to put all that off just for tonight and deal with it tomorrow, yet here all that muck was being drugged up again. The young blond had already shifted into panic mode, his lust gone and replaced by feelings of fear and self-doubt as he began freaking out about recent events, feeling like he had utterly lost control of his body and his emotions recently.

But even if his brain was currently having a complete breakdown, Naruto’s dick seemed not to mind the horrifying thoughts in the least, still standing out from his crotch as hard as ever and begging to be touched once again, pleading with Naruto to finish the deed to its hot, sticky, satisfying conclusion. Naruto would have loved to pretend that he wasn’t attracted to the woman anymore _so much_ right now, that his momentary lapse in sanity, that mental image of her similarities to _that guy_ had made her disgusting and vile in his eyes… But _dammit_ , that would have been a big fat lie. Even after those shocking thoughts forcing their way in, even after her treason against him, Naruto still thought she was irresistibly attractive, couldn’t at all deny her continued appeal. The seductive woman’s image refused to be budged from his head, still laying there on that couch tormenting him so relentlessly with those piercing eyes of hers.

Naruto took a halfhearted look down at his still throbbing penis. His raging hard-on wouldn’t go down, not even a little bit. He desperately begged his erection to go away, not mentally in the mood for this anymore, but it continued to plague Naruto no matter what words he used to try to appease it, no matter how the boy tried to convince it that there was just _no way_ he could possibly continue after such a nasty shock to the senses. Yes, he was actually trying to reason with his own dick, that's how rattled and desperate Naruto was to just forget this all had happened and suppress it as deep down as he could right now. All that blood flowing through his rock hard member remained stubbornly in place, though, refusing to leave his groin and hand control of his body back to his brain as it steadily coursed through his dick and drained away blood from the rest of his body. Naruto’s youthful sex drive continued to remain at the ready and excited to the max. His aching, reddened member was so hard that it was actually starting to hurt now, the stagnated standoff between the penis and the boy it was attached to becoming somewhat painful to him. Even after an interruption to his pleasuring by the brief mental flash of a guy, and worst of all _that guy_ , his erection didn’t seem to care at all. Naruto’s bodily urges didn’t give a damn about his mental freak out or his aversion to continue this now ruined session. Yup, ‘Little Naruto’ definitely had a mind and desires of his own and sometimes he was even more stubborn than Naruto was, not caring at all what his owner wanted, only about his own satisfaction.

“Grrrrr! ...Fine!!” Naruto growled in frustrated mental agony after a long period of silent reflection, knowing his boner wouldn’t soften unless it was sated and happy, and also very wary of giving himself a case of blue balls. Even if Naruto wasn’t exactly happy with ‘Little Naruto’ at the moment, the boy had no choice but to relent and give in to his desires once again, lest the pressure building up in his nuts get even worse than it already was. Reluctantly swallowing his shame and disappointment in himself, Naruto crawled over to the other end of his bed where he had thrown the magazine away from himself in disgust after it had offended his sensibilities so badly and checked to make sure it hadn’t been damaged by his outburst of anger before reopening the book to the same exact page that he had been looking at before, the dark haired woman still waiting there for him.

As if confirming how desirous Naruto still found her, once he had flipped the magazine open and took hold of his erection again, a big droplet of pre-cum formed at the tip of his penis and slowly dripped down the length of his dick into his once again swiftly moving hand. More and more pre came steadily leaking out in a little river of excitement, wetting his hand with the slimy lube he enjoyed using so much as Naruto resumed his passionate thrusting and tugging, once again trying to push everything bothersome aside and get back into the simplistic rhythm of beating off. There was so much of that clear liquid pouring out of his slit now that it was like Naruto’s member was weeping with joy, tearfully thanking him for deciding to continue. He wasn’t very happy with his dramatic physical reaction to seeing the stunning woman again, but even considering what had happened, something about her was just so damn alluring Naruto couldn’t look away or reject her, even after his very rude awakening. But he wasn’t staring at her cute breasts or the finger so wonderfully swallowed up all the way to the knuckle into her warm tightness anymore; no, he was drawn almost unwillingly into looking directly at her face as he stroked himself and was seriously getting worked up because of it. Her expression and her features were still so captivating, even if they unfortunately reminded Naruto of _him_ . Naruto’s eyes were locked on the women's own glimmering dark orbs as he jacked himself off with increasing wild vigor. Those mystifying midnight black eyes staring back at him… Eyes just like _he_ had…

If Naruto used his imagination, he reluctantly had to admit the model did look a lot like what _he_ probably would look like if he were older ...and of course female. The boy didn’t enjoy admitting that fact at the moment, but there was a strong resemblance of sorts in both their demeanor and appearance. ...Yes, _he_ also shared that mysterious quality that the insidious spider-like model had, that strange look deep in the eyes that made you so uncomfortable and unguarded whenever they looked at you, that sublime attractiveness that drew people’s gazes, that annoying but somehow equally enticing air of fierce superiority all recklessly drawing Naruto in… Drawing him to _both_ of them.

Naruto hated that guy so much and had always tried his best to stay far away and ignore that jerk’s pretentious excellence, yet it always came back to him in the end, no matter what Naruto did he found he just couldn’t ignore that guy, no matter how much he annoyed and infuriated Naruto with his flippant, stuck-up attitude and mean remarks Naruto just couldn't stay away from him. Thus after a while they had become stalwart rivals, always squabbling with each other, competing at every possible chance, and because of that odd relationship tween them Naruto eventually began secretly seeking his approval desperately. Naruto strived to be on equal ground with his rival, to gain his recognition as someone strong, because deep down in the depths of his heart where emotions that he tried to reject and hide lay buried, Naruto honestly and truly admired that guy; his strength, his intelligence, his popularity, his determination. He was so strong and so cool, a perfect example of what a good shinobi should be, someone Naruto had decided he wanted to be more like. Naruto had felt that way for a long time, since back before they had ever been teamed up when they were young classmates, just little boys still learning the ropes and not the strong young ninja they were now. Naruto still felt that way even now, even if he tried so hard to shelter his own feelings from himself, even as Naruto’s emotions broke into opposing camps squabbling between accepting or denying those feelings, his thoughts divided between his desire to explore this strange new connection that they had recently formed or rejecting it entirely and denying that anything but hatred existed between them. That guy troubled Naruto so damn much; even now in his most intimate personal moments he couldn’t escape that bastard.

So why couldn’t he ever accept Naruto? Why did he never pay any attention even when Naruto tried so hard? The energetic boy restlessly tried and tried to gain that guy’s attention, to have him compliment Naruto even just once, to have that stubborn jackass look his way with more than disdain in his eyes and to genuinely approve of his skills, but to little avail so far; that guy never seemed to care, always off in his own world despite Naruto's attempts. ...At least, that was until recently. He had finally seemed to notice that Naruto actually existed, after so much hard work and effort put in by the blond. His actions in the Land of Waves, their unprecedented teamwork together, his commitment to protecting Naruto in the face of danger, it seemed he was finally starting to pay attention, even if only a little. But it still wasn’t enough for Naruto. Not _nearly_ enough. No, not until that bastard truly approved of and respected Naruto would it be enough for him, not until he had truly gained that guy’s attention would Naruto then be satisfied.

Naruto wasn’t dumb, he realized how it could seem like he was obsessed to others, unhealthily interested in that guy. Even Naruto couldn't help but think that way sometimes. It was just that… he wanted to be strong. _Truly_ strong. And if the best shinobi in their class came to regard him as such, then Naruto would know his dream of becoming Hokage was possible, that he could one day become more than the hated little pest everyone thought of him as. And maybe that guy would take notice once Naruto was strong, and maybe he wouldn’t be just an enemy or rival anymore but… a friend who shared something in common. Naruto’s first real friend ever. No matter how much he thought about it, though, Naruto just couldn’t fully understand why he was so fixated on that guy either, could never plainly figure out his own feelings on the subject throughout the years spent together at the Academy. Anyone strong would have been a good choice for a rival, so why had Naruto picked _him_ out specifically to be his competition from long ago back in their days at the Academy, selected that jerk out to be his equal match and his opposite number? From then on, _he_ was the only rival Naruto decided he ever wanted, and oddly enough one of the few people whose opinion mattered to him and whose acceptance the isolated boy so desired. It hurt when he didn’t pay attention, it was annoying when he hurled insults at Naruto, and it meant the world the few times he had actually paid Naruto even a small amount of respect. What was it about that jackass that was so oddly enticing, so mesmerizing? Why the hell was Naruto so drawn to that bastard?

Sasuke Uchiha was just so… So… No words immediately came to mind. Naruto had no idea how to describe him anymore, no idea what was going on deep in his own soul as it became cloudy and troubled with doubt and confusion towards someone he was supposed to hate, but whom he had secretly never _entirely_ disliked. Naruto had been trying to push that away tonight, trying to just enjoy himself and worry about those troubling feelings later, but it all came flooding in, all those things he was trying to suppress, hidden memories and emotions and bitter confliction all rushing back after being reawakened by the black haired woman in his dirty magazine. After everything that had happened between them in the Land of Waves, all those new emotions that had been stirred up, Naruto’s feelings were becoming so muddled, like a hundred colors of paint all mixed together so you could no longer tell which was which, blended into a disgusting, unknowable new creation. What the hell was going on?

Dark eyes. That was all Naruto saw anymore as he continued to jerk off while looking down at the magazine, his hand working double time to get himself off, to finally arrive at the climax of this utterly weird session. Black, compelling, mysterious eyes he knew nothing about… But that he wished he _did_ know. Naruto wanted to know what was hidden behind those eyes, what sorts of secret feelings and thoughts went on behind that stern camouflage pushing people away with spiteful glares. But not of her eyes. ...No, what was behind _his_ eyes? What hidden thoughts did Sasuke hold inside, what feelings did he hide from everyone else? Thoughts of the beautiful woman were gone from Naruto’s mind now, he no longer imagined her lithe naked body, her flowing black locks, her firm breasts. Her body melted away until only those eyes remained, his attention focused solely on those glassy orbs. Thoughts of the beautiful seductress were replaced entirely by dirty thoughts of… Just what the _hell_ was going on?

Something very strange was happening to him. Naruto looked away from the magazine for a moment, tearing himself away from those black eyes staring back at him and turning his attention down to his own crotch, absentmindedly watching his hand so expertly continue its work to bring himself to ecstasy. Naruto noticed his penis seemed to have gotten a little bit longer since the last time he had accurately measured it; it definitely looked bigger in his hand than it had before, but maybe that was just an illusion due to how overpoweringly aroused he was right now. And as Naruto was watching himself rapidly stroke, thinking over the size of his own boyhood all the while, a random thought slipped into his mind: just how big was Sasuke? From his shameful little voyeuristic adventure in the old bridge builder’s bathroom in the Land of Waves Naruto knew that Sasuke’s penis was a _little bit_ longer than his own, but that had been when they were both soft. It was annoying to be smaller in that department when compared to his rival, somewhat of an insult to Naruto’s feelings of manliness as he continued to mature, but Naruto curiously wondered how big Sasuke really was, how big his penis looked when it was swollen and hard and ready to burst just like Naruto’s was now. How did these two rivals compare in that most masculine and personal of ways?

That unwanted curiosity that had attacked Naruto and forced him to unwillingly spy on Sasuke back then now came rushing back all at once, overwhelming his senses with force. As he thrust over and over into his hand, edging closer to release every second, Naruto wondered if Sasuke had the same issues with puberty that he did; those annoying, yucky wet dreams that made such a mess of everything, popping embarrassing spontaneous boners at the drop of a hat, even out in public, the burning heat that built up in your junk unless you took care of it every so often. Did Sasuke also have to put up with all those things? Did he also jack off like Naruto was doing right now? It was such an odd thought; it was tough to imagine Sasuke doing this kind of disgusting, demeaning thing, getting all sweaty and horny, pleasuring himself with such animalistic passion. The calm and detached Sasuke seemed like he was above all that somehow, but… Yes, he _must_ have done it too. He was a guy too after all, he must have known those feelings as well. For some reason that thought made Naruto… relived. The belief that even Sasuke too was a slave to his passions sometimes, that he might do this degrading but amazing act as well, it made them equal in that regard, allowing Naruto to not feel lesser than his comrade.

...Naruto’s mind wandered as he continued his amorous work, utterly hating himself for it, but committed to continue walking down this equally exciting and revolting road to the end. His curious inner workings focused entirely on thoughts of his comrade and rival. What sorts of noises did Sasuke make when he touched himself? Did he pant and moan and gasp like Naruto did, or was he silent, quietly enjoying his self-pleasure with his usual calm dignity? It was difficult to imagine the sour, stubborn boy ever being loud like that, but maybe the only time Sasuke _was_ loud was when he was all alone. What did Sasuke think about when he was doing it, what sorts of dirty things did he imagine? What did he look like while doing it? These thoughts were simultaneous disgusting and thrilling to Naruto, his lust addled mind pushing him to think more about his rival’s private needs, about the most intimate and personal things about the guy who drove Naruto to do so many things, whether it was to study and train to become a stronger ninja or even… _this_.

Try as he might to stop them, images flowed into Naruto’s head unceasingly as he returned his gaze to the magazine to lock eyes with the image of the woman, now focusing _only_ on her eyes and not her beautiful body. The eyes that reminded him of Sasuke… Those mental images Naruto had been trying so hard to hold back were breaking out of their containment: memories of firm, pert buttocks, tight ab muscles, of broad shoulders, impressive biceps, and a flat, smooth stomach sensuously dripping with beads of water. Mental pictures of Sasuke’s handsome, naked young body… That open look he had gotten of Sasuke in Tazuna’s bathroom had seriously broken Naruto’s brain or something. He should have never done that, but it was far too late to do anything about it now. Naruto helplessly tried driving the offending images out, but instead they were only driving him wild. He was entirely captivated by what he had seen then, recalling those brief lewd glimpses in his head. Naruto’s two trains of thought then combined, the undoubtedly arousing and sickening thoughts of Sasuke’s ‘personal habits’ mixing with the memories of his muscular naked body, forming a new sort of thought for Naruto to masturbate to.

Sasuke’s entirely nude form stood there in Naruto's mind’s eye, his small black bush of pubes, his pale skin, and his well-defined figure all a match for what Naruto had seen that day. This was so twisted. But Naruto couldn’t stop. Now now. Not any longer. He was too far gone, too into it to stop now. The Sasuke in Naruto’s fantasy was wearing a cocky grin on his face as the imagined boy reached down and started to slowly touching himself, getting himself as erect and uncontrolled as Naruto currently was. The imaginary Sasuke’s piercing black eyes were looking straight at Naruto the whole time he was stroking himself, that gaze boring into Naruto’s very soul. Sasuke's face became flushed as sweat dripped down his handsome features, splotchy red patches growing on his cheeks as the imagined Sasuke rubbed himself faster and faster, the black haired boy writhing and panting in pleasure as he stroked himself, looking so remarkably different from how he usually did. Naruto couldn’t escape it: back then at his first glance and now as well, Naruto acknowledged that Sasuke was attractive, just as the black haired woman in his magazine had been. They were both positively alluring in some odd undefined way.

Naruto tried one last time to switch back to thoughts of the black haired woman, tried to get away from this train of thought before it was too late, but he just couldn’t anymore. The boy was too absorbed with the mental picture of his rival, getting a nasty, weird voyeuristic pleasure from imagining Sasuke receiving his own pleasure, imagining they were competing to see who would come first, staring eye to eye while the two boys furiously masturbated. ...No, on second thought Naruto would let those dirty images stay there in his head a while. He was shocked to find himself allowing them in, actually consenting to jerking off while thinking about Sasuke, but after much fruitless fighting he relented to their pull; he was too turned on anymore to care what caused his orgasm, only that it happened soon. He had been so repulsed by these thoughts just moments ago, but now Naruto was openly welcoming them, at least for the moment. It was wrong. _So wrong_. But it also felt so good. He was too enticed, too enthralled with the images of Sasuke’s exposed form in his head to stop now. It was just masturbation after all. Disgusting, base human instinct. It didn’t mean anything. It didn’t mean anything. It didn’t mean anything. Over and over Naruto told himself this as he edged closer and closer to his breaking point, quickly barreling down on his long sought after moment of sheer ecstasy. None of this meant anything.

Naruto’s hand was almost a blur as he approached his climax, pumping his throbbing erection faster and harder, faster and harder, needing more friction, more tightness, more speed for his pending release. It was freaking weird beyond belief what he was thinking, the images flowing in his mind as Naruto did this absurdly dirty and crazy act, but _oh god,_ he didn’t give a damn anymore! Just for the moment he didn’t care. Just for this short instant all he could think about was all that cum boiling in his balls, how badly the teen needed to blow his load, all that amazingly warm stuff that would soon come spurting out. He was _so close_ , walking right on the edge of bliss, unintentionally driven there by his jerk rival. Just a little more, a few more strokes, a few more dirty mental images, and Naruto would finally get feel that heavenly climax after so much impatient waiting. He couldn’t stop now even if he wanted to. It wasn’t even like he was jerking off anymore, now Naruto was practically pounding into his fist, bucking and slapping with wild abandon, desperately seeking to nut. Those degrading, disgusting, humiliating thoughts, they were making him utterly crazy in so many ways! In his imagination, Sasuke was approaching his peak as well, grunting in need as he rapidly stroked his impressive erection. Naruto could practically hear Sasuke’s breathy groans in his ear as the black haired boy continued his urgent thrusting, still wearing that stupid smug grin as his dark eyes glimmered with passion and lust, still piercing into Naruto. Naruto was imagining Sasuke staring at him and himself staring at Sasuke, both of them openly touching themselves in front of each other. It was sick and perverse… and it was delightfully hot!

“Ngh! Tissue!” Naruto gasped urgently, quickly snatching up a tissue from the box strategically placed on the table next to his bed, knowing that his release was impending and he could only hold out for just a few more seconds. One last thrust was all it would take, one final movement to bring him to orgasm, weeks of pent up teenaged need on the verge of spilling out. Naruto carefully positioned the tissue with his free hand, ready to catch the river of his seed that would very soon come flowing out.

When he finally came, Naruto experienced the most intense, mind blowing orgasm of his young life; he had died and gone to heaven, coming with such powerful force that he swore he had blacked out for a split second. “Gahh! Ah!” the blond wailed in utter delight, unable to hold back his loud raspy cries of pleasure as he was instantly flooded with bliss, an ocean of beautiful relief coursing through his veins and crashing over him. Naruto’s little body trembled and shivered at the sensation of his most amazing climax ever, his spine tingling and eyelids fluttering as he reached his peak of ecstasy. Naruto’s nut sack tightened and retracted up towards his body as his penis pulsated madly, his genitals forcing out their overly full contents as young jizz came spurting out like a geyser. Naruto unleashed five thick shots of pearlescent cum into the tissue held in his awaiting hand–an impressively big load of love juice for someone his age–collected over weeks and weeks of inattentive frustration. Rope after rope of his white seed came forcefully shooting out into the tissue, leaving it soggy and moist in his hand as Naruto tried cautiously to not come all over his blanket with the remarkably powerful shots. Some of his sticky jizz started overflowing from the overly full tissue onto his palm, heating his skin with the wet warmth of his loins, that same warmth that had needed to be let out so badly.

Riding his high downwards back to earth, Naruto let out a loud half-gasp, half-sigh of immense pleasure as he lazily stroked his overly sensitive dick a few more times after his spectacular orgasm had finished, intending on milking out every single last drop of creamy cum that had been residing in his nuts up to this point. One last droplet of the milky fluid came dripping out into the tissue, coaxed out by the magical work of Naruto’s hand. Now only a wet trail of semen came drooling out of his dick hole, the last remnants of what the boy's balls had not blasted out. Naruto panted wearily, washed over by a great sense of tiredness and exhaustion from his–in more ways than one–draining orgasm. He unenthusiastically set out about cleaning up, tossing the sodden cum soaked tissue into the trash bin and washing the extra spilled semen off his hands in the bathroom. But there was a deeper problem at hand, something that needed addressing before he could peacefully drift off to sleep.

Almost immediately after coming down from his high the guilt began to set in, pushing and probing at Naruto’s now defenseless and distracted mind. Just what in the hell had he just done?! What kind of screwed up, disgusting things had he been thinking only a few moments ago?! _Yet again_ Naruto had acted so absurdly when it came to Sasuke. All because of that damned magazine… Deep down Naruto knew that it wasn’t entirely that seductive raven haired ladies’ fault and that his weird problem with Sasuke had started long before this night, he was only desperately attempting to rationalize his actions at the moment, trying to pass the blame. Naruto grit his teeth as he stared down accusingly at the magazine, pondering just what to do with it after what had happened. He wanted to rip that page out of the book so badly, so caught up in guilt and shame and fear at the thoughts spinning in his head as he pleasured himself, Naruto wanted to crumple that offending image up and throw it in the garbage where it could never do that to him again. ...But how could he do such a thing knowing how much pleasure the black haired beauty had given him? Naruto had never before in his short life been that aroused and had never come that hard. Could he really trash something that had brought him such delightful good feelings?

Instead of getting furious at the picture for the confusing feelings it aroused in him like he _should_ have, Naruto very carefully checked the page to make sure he hadn’t accidentally dripped any of his wayward cum shots on the paper and despoiled the image as a result of his powerful orgasm. Content that the view of the raven model was unharmed by any of his ejected spunk, the image still pristine and still bringing out all sorts of conflicting feelings, Naruto smoothed out the page with his hands to ensure it wouldn’t wrinkle, gently closed the magazine shut, and carefully placed it back in its hiding place underneath his mattress, treating the book… No, treating _that particular image_ as if were something very valuable and precious, worth its own weight in warm, sticky, white gold.

Naruto picked up the underwear he had cast aside earlier in his eagerness to sate his boiling lust off the floor and slipped them back on, deciding he should get to sleep now that he was thoroughly pleased. He knew he would be feeling untold amounts of shame and confusion and revulsion very soon, far exceeding anything he had felt before, but right now Naruto was just too damn drained and content to care, floating like a feather on a breeze in his post-orgasmic haze. There would be time to freak out later, he convinced himself, once again pushing aside those dastardly worries. Right now Naruto was just too happy and too exhausted to concern himself with all that, his head resting on a pillow that felt like a wonderful fluffy cloud right about now, his stomach stuffed with his favorite food, and his testicles gloriously drained of all that liquid tension formerly brewing in them. Naruto was too content with things to worry at the moment, quickly drifting off into a much needed vacation to dreamland.

***

Right as Naruto awoke from his slumber and groggily opened his eyes to the overbearing bright light of a new day, he was immediately struck with feelings of regret like a ton of bricks crashing down on him all at once. And how could he _not_ be regretting his actions right now? Naruto couldn’t _believe_ the kinds of things he had been doing recently. And all of them, every last awkward moment, every absurd action he had made, every strange emotion leaking into his brain, every single thing he was now freaking out about involved Sasuke Uchiha, his biggest rival and fellow teammate, in some way or another.

It was now the morning after Team 7 had arrived back home from the Land of Waves. Once the group had finally come back safe and sound to the Leaf Village, Naruto had gone off to have a big delicious bowl of ramen with his former teacher Iruka just as he always did after finishing a mission whether it was big or small, then he returned to his apartment to have a little ‘private time’ all to himself, quickly falling into a wonderful, contented sleep after the genin had finished up with his self-pleasuring, as teen boys often did. With as drained as he was from the mission, Naruto was out like a light almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. After all the hard won fights during that long, tiring mission, all the unexpected troubles and trials Team 7 had come across, Naruto had been both physically and emotionally exhausted, more than ready for the opportunity to crash. His sleep was so peaceful and untroubled it was like he had fallen under a spell, like a princess in one of those story books. Unfortunately, all good things eventually came to an end. Naruto’s delightful rest was interrupted not by the kiss of a handsome prince–thankfully enough, though; Naruto was _not_ interested in getting kissed by any more guys, even one had been far too many for him–but by the sudden flood of terror shooting into his mind, the memory of what he and Sasuke had done surging into his brain all at once.

Naruto may have still been sleepy and unfocused just after waking up from his deep slumber, but that confused state only lasted for a brief moment, a temporary pause as his brain readjusted to the waking world and the boy was jolted completely awake and aware at the realization of the magnitude of his recent foolish actions. The early morning fog in his head was all blown away in an instant by a gust of disbelief, leaving behind only an empty void of shock. Naruto had been too tired, too worn down last night after finishing his meal and pleasuring himself before bedtime to occupy himself with those feelings laying in wait in the back of his mind, but now that he was refreshed after the good night’s rest, the self-doubt and despair had begun to flood back into Naruto, forcing him to confront it head on. Those worrying thoughts that had only temporarily been held at bay by his exhaustion and weariness were now free of their shackles to run wild through his head. And boy were they running.

He had done it. Naruto couldn’t believe he had actually done it, that he had taken that final doozy of a step towards the unknown, but he definitely had. Twice in fact! Not just once, but _two_ times he had done that insane thing with Sasuke. It had been a huge mistake, however, Naruto realized that very clearly now. The weirdest, dumbest thing he had ever done in his life, bar none. Why had he done it? How could he have been so stupid? These self-criticizing thoughts repeated over and over on a loop in the boy’s brain as he continuously questioned his own actions and motives.

“AAAAH! What the hell did I do that for?!” Naruto screamed out so loud that it echoed through his bedroom, the question reverberating off the walls and back into his own ears as he flailed around dramatically in his bed, rolling back and forth with his hands covering his face to hide his shame and humiliation. He was not at all happy with himself for doing what he had done, completely soaking in self-loathing and regret like a pickle in brine at the moment.

At the time Naruto hadn’t really thought much about the act; it had just felt like the right thing to do, as caught up in the emotions of the moment as he was. Naruto’s mind had sent out no warning signals about how idiotic the thing he had been contemplating was, no alert to stop his reckless course of action before it was too late. No, it was more like his brain had temporarily shut down and let his emotions freely take over, causing Naruto to do that most absurd, regretful, disgusting thing that he had done all those days ago.

As Sasuke lay there recovering in Tazuna’s house in the Land of Waves, looking so unusually frail and defenseless as he slept, Naruto found he just couldn’t help himself anymore. The preteen's swelling feelings of worry and fear and gratitude overcame his better senses, drowning out all sane thought and causing him to act completely irrationally. At that moment, as he gazed down on his wounded teammate, Naruto found himself wanting to kiss Sasuke again, to make sure that moment was real, to confirm that his comrade hadn’t sacrificed his life for him and that it hadn't all been just a dream. With only the two of them together in that room the mood had been so oddly gentle and warm, everything about that moment pushing Naruto to do that inconceivable thing, and the first nice, positive feelings he had ever felt towards Sasuke began welling up inside Naruto’s chest as he leaned down to softly plant his own lips against Sasuke’s.

But now that Naruto had come back to the Hidden Leaf Village and had some time to recoup and sort through his swirling thoughts, he realized just how insane what he had done really was. He had actually _kissed_ his bastard rival. Twice! Naruto honestly had no idea why he did it, could figure out no good explanation for his actions back then. Something about Sasuke’s fragile appearance had brought him to desire the feeling of the warmness of those lips against his own once again, to feel close to Sasuke in whatever way he could after almost loosing him. But that had been a mistake, a huge blunder! From the very moment he woke up Naruto began agonizing over it, running over those events in his head again and again. How could he have done something so stupid? Why had he been compelled to do something so reckless and strange? And most importantly, why had Sasuke let him do it in the first place?

Yes, Sasuke had undeniably allowed Naruto to kiss him. You could even say he had actually encouraged it. Sasuke hadn’t fought back or pushed Naruto away or even insulted him like usual. Naruto had been expecting to have to defend himself against Sasuke’s irate fury after being caught during the first ill-thought-out smooch he placed on Sasuke’s resting lips, but Sasuke had been shockingly mellow and uncaring about Naruto kissing him, even letting him do it again, accepting the feeling of their mouths locked together once again for some reason beyond all rationality. There was no punishment for Naruto's rash actions, no judgment directed at him from Sasuke’s strangely warm gaze, not even the sense of fear and disgust in the pit of his stomach anymore. There had only been that weird, previously unknown feeling creeping its way through Naruto’s body as the rivals quietly looked into each others eyes, that odd sensation building up in his chest that he had no idea how to accurately describe. It was an annoying and consuming feeling that the boy had never felt before in his life, worming its way through him like tendrils of greasy black oil, quietly compelling Naruto to do the unthinkable.

So Naruto willingly took Sasuke up on the bizarre offer and actually kissed him _yet again_ because… Well, Naruto didn’t know exactly _why_ he did it now that he actually thought about the act rationally. It just felt pleasant and it made him feel strangely connected to Sasuke, like maybe there was more between them than just their surface rivalry and competition, something deeper and less clear-cut. Naruto had been distraught over Sasuke’s supposed death in battle, so much so that he had even cried all those unexpected tears. He had actually cried for _Sasuke_ , that jackass who had never once said something even relatively nice to Naruto in all their years at the Academy, the guy who never missed a chance to mock him and always called him a loser. Those tears had just come streaming out unopposed once Sasuke had fallen silent and still, though, Naruto barely even realizing that he was crying until he felt the hot wetness dripping down his cheeks. Naruto never would have predicted that something like that would have happened between them, that he would ever have felt so sad at Sasuke’s absence; Sasuke hated him and he hated Sasuke. That was just the way it was; they were two young rivals stuck in an endless series of competitions and never seemed to agree or get along, even though they were supposed to be comrades. Yet despite all that ill-will between them, Sasuke and Naruto had tried so hard to effectively work together in order to fight against Haku, defending each other, supporting each other, protecting each other–even if only in their own weird ways–just like true comrades did. Naruto had been so distressed and broken by the loss of his teammate, so filled up with an array of new and confusing feelings as Sasuke ‘perished’ that even he was surprised to feel those never before experienced emotions coursing through his veins like fire.

So Naruto supposed _that_ was why he had done it. _That_ was why he had wanted to kiss Sasuke at that time. Because of his fear, guilt, relief, happiness, all those emotions mixing together into a nasty, confusing storm in his chest. But that still didn’t excuse the fact that it was a stupid mistake that he now utterly regretted, something that the boy knew he should have never even attempted in the first place.

Try as he might to escape it, however, Naruto’s subconscious feelings confirmed the fact that he had actually sort of liked it. That misguided kiss surprisingly had made him feel somewhat happy, comforted inside to know that the guy who had saved his life wasn’t an _entirely_ unbearable jackass, that even Sasuke had an admirable and, perhaps not friendly, but at least a more gentle and caring side to him, one that didn’t want to see his comrades harmed. Naruto's continuing uneasy feelings, that unmistakable oily feeling building up inside him, silently confirmed that he even might want to try it again if given the chance. Those opposing feelings dueled against each other, Naruto’s disgust and terror squared off against his newfound sense of respect for Sasuke and that strange nameless, sticky, viscous emotion that still hadn’t entirely gone away.

But he _couldn’t_ do it again. That would just be nuts. Naruto knew that. If you included the Shadow Clone he had kissed as a test way back, then Naruto had kissed Sasuke four times. Four whole times! That was a staggeringly high number of occasions to kiss someone you hated. If it happened once, that could be said to be just an accident; if it happened twice, then that was coincidence; but after three times it was becoming a pattern, and something was definitely not right once the number got that high. You couldn’t just do that three or four times and pretend like everything was still the same as before. You couldn’t lock lips with someone on four occasions and continue to say that it all meant nothing, that there wasn’t something unusual going on between you. But Naruto refused to admit anything strange was going on, other than that maybe his brain was becoming broken from overexposure to Sasuke’s bad attitude. That certainly explained everything. So no, definitely not! It couldn’t happen ever again, even if Naruto wanted it to–which he certainly didn’t! ...Or maybe he actually did? Naruto really wasn’t so sure of anything anymore… No! No matter what, Naruto had to keep his distance from that asshole! He needed to break this chain of events once and for all before it could pollute his mind even further, and the only way to do that was to avoid Sasuke at all costs. Once things calmed down and his weird feelings settled then everything would return to normal between him and Sasuke and they could return to their former state of rivalry, nothing to worry about or agonize over, just their normal relationship of mutual dislike. ...At least, that was what Naruto _hoped_ would happen; he didn’t know how much longer he could deal with all this confusing crap. As much as Sasuke drove Naruto nuts, that kind of relationship with him was much easier to manage and understand than their current connection. Whatever was going on between them these days, Naruto just didn’t _get_ it.

Naruto finally ceased his long continuous bout of wild rolling back and forth while panicking over his own actions, knowing he couldn’t put off the inevitable any longer despite how much he complained and whined about it. After being given yesterday off to rest and relax after their brutal mission, this afternoon would be Team 7’s first time assembling together since they arrived back from the Land of Waves. Even after all that they had experienced, there were still missions to do; the life of a ninja certainly wasn’t an easy one. Luckily, today’s mission was sure to be something simple, something that hopefully didn’t result in a team member almost dying like last time. If it was something easy after all, then Naruto's teammates surely wouldn’t need him there, the rest of Team 7 would be fine without him there. Naruto had kept convincing himself of this over and over since he had woken up, repeating the thought again and again as he lay in bed, hoping to get out of his duty today. He could definitely sit this one out if it was something easy. Naruto hoped and wondered if maybe he could skip the mission today and say he was sick or something like that as an excuse. But no, after a while of thinking it over Naruto realized that sadly wouldn’t work; Sakura would probably come beat down his door and drag him off if he stalled too much and didn’t show up, and the slave driver Kakashi-sensei wasn’t likely to buy it in any case.

Naruto let out a long, unhappy sigh, despondently realizing he would have to get out of bed and go out to face the world no matter what, that no matter what kind of excuse he tried to pull, he just wouldn’t be able to get out of his obligation to his team today. For once in Naruto’s life he wasn’t at all excited to receive a mission the way he always was, ready and eager to face the challenges of a new day. The rambunctious kid approached even the easiest missions with that endless energy of his, believing that every successful mission inched him closer to becoming Hokage, intent on learning new things to push him forward bit by bit towards his goal.

But today was different than all those other days; Naruto just couldn’t work up the excitement for this mission today. It wasn’t really the mission itself that was the problem, though. Naruto had no big issues with the missions Team 7 was assigned, other than that he believed some of them were extremely dull and boring and definitely below a talented ninja of his caliber. No, it was who would be there with him on that mission that was bothering Naruto. He wasn’t at all looking forward to seeing Sasuke again after what had happened between them. He just had no idea how to deal with Sasuke anymore. Naruto really didn’t want to have to deal with him right now, whatever hateful words or angry glares he was sure to throw Naruto’s way. Naruto wasn’t in the mood to be around that guy at the moment, oh how he wished he wouldn’t have to see Sasuke today. That wasn’t to say of course that he was usually happy to see that grumpy, combative jerk under any normal circumstances. So today you could actually say Naruto was dreading their meeting something _extra_. Naruto let out another depressed sigh as he prepared his clothes and gear for the task ahead of him; he just knew it wasn’t going to be a good day for him.

***

“I can’t believe I let him do that,” Sasuke moped, pacing back and forth anxiously in his bedroom contemplating the events of a few days ago. “I actually let him… Ugh, what the hell’s wrong with me these days?” he sighed, massaging his throbbing temples. This whole mess was giving him one big, annoying headache. How typical of Naruto, even thinking about him annoyed Sasuke.

He could have stopped Naruto then. He could have prevented all this fretting and regretting he was now doing. But Sasuke hadn’t, instead he had pretty much _invited_ Naruto to kiss him again. The reasons for him saying those words were utterly beyond Sasuke’s understanding. He just blurted them out unthinkingly, barely realizing what he had even said. There had just been something so unusual and compelling about the way Naruto had looked down at him, those big azure eyes of his so full of compassion and worry and…

Sasuke shook his head vigorously, trying to shake away this odd sensation that had been eating at him all morning. Naruto had been making Sasuke do a lot of odd things lately. Why had he been so intent on saving that loser? He didn’t even like Naruto and yet Sasuke always seemed to be thinking about him recently, looking out for the stupid blond more and more since they had been teamed up, keeping a watchful eye over him as they completed missions together. Back in the Land of Waves Sasuke had jumped in front of Naruto to protect him, he had been so desperate to keep that loser from grievous harm. His body moved before his brain had its own say in the matter, acting entirely on reactionary impulse and emotional drive, things Sasuke tried to avoid. Sasuke recalled that in that moment as he leapt in front of Naruto to shield the loser he had found himself oddly calm and resolute despite the chaotic situation around him, entirely content with his actions, like in that moment there was nothing more in the world he wanted to do than save that dumb loudmouth.

But there _was_ and that was exactly the problem. Sasuke’s goal was to exact revenge on Itachi, that traitor brother of his, something he needed to stay alive no matter what in order to accomplish, and yet he had so recklessly and uncharacteristically jeopardized that all-important mission. So why was it that in that moment when Sasuke defended Naruto he had felt so bizarrely at peace? In the depths of his soul Sasuke had felt like that saving Naruto had been enough, that if he was going to die then so be it, he had at least accomplished that much. But that was so radically different from what Sasuke always thought, entirely separate from his usual track of mind. All he could ever think or dream or hope for was acquiring the strength needed to destroy Itachi. Yet in that single odd instance all Sasuke had thought about was the teammate desperately fighting along beside him, ensuring that he lived on even if Sasuke himself did not survive that battle.

Because of his unusual actions back then Sasuke was now beginning to realize that Naruto had some sort of weird pull over him. He ignored pretty much everyone else or at the least gave them as little thought and attention as was required, content to quietly live out his life for his single goal without the need for troubling connections, but for some reason he just couldn’t ignore Naruto, try as he might. Somehow Naruto always seemed to capture his attention and draw Sasuke in with his boisterous proclamations of competition, his ravenous appetite, his general dumbassery; there was just something oddly magnetic about the blond boy.

As he paced back and forth like a caged animal, Sasuke tried in vain to hold back a big yawn; he hadn’t been able to sleep much at all last night. His mind kept racing all through the night, worriedly thinking over that kiss Naruto had given him. No, rather it was the kiss that he had with Naruto, the kiss they had _shared_. Sasuke couldn’t avoid it or lie to himself anymore, even if he really wanted to and wished so much that he could; it wasn’t exactly right to say he wasn’t also partly to blame for what had happened. Sasuke had undeniably kissed back the second time Naruto had bent down to touch their lips together. He didn’t know _why_ he had allowed it, however, and that fact was making him anxious and sick, but his actions were unmistakable and Sasuke was busy driving himself insane trying to find a rational excuse for his actions, something he could pin his motives on and shift all the blame onto.

But despite all the nervous fretting he was doing at the moment, the worst thing of all, the most difficult thing to rationalize, was that Sasuke knew he could have easily pushed Naruto away when the loser had tried to kiss him, punched that idiotic face of his and screamed at him or something, but Sasuke hadn’t, he didn’t fight or struggle at all back then. Sasuke had instead actually went along with that insane action, not shoving Naruto away, but in fact drawing him closer with his own lips, his own look of casual acceptance. Why had he let Naruto do that? Sasuke had just laid back and let that idiot put his mouth on him, patiently letting Naruto do as he pleased. Sasuke had been agonizing over it all morning, but still had no real answer. He was disgusted with himself for letting his emotions get the better of him. That was exactly the kind of thing he had sworn to himself to avoid, a solemn promise he had made after his family had been massacred. Sasuke had briefly lost his reason and been caught up in Naruto’s haphazard pace, doing something utterly insane in the process, and now Sasuke was paying the price for it.

_It was that look_ , Sasuke reluctantly convinced himself, definitively shifting all the blame onto Naruto. That damned look that Naruto gave him. ...Why _had_ Naruto seemed so grateful he was still alive? Why had the boy’s obnoxiously deep blue eyes gleaned with relief and subtle, hidden fear and sadness? It wasn’t like they were friends, why would Naruto even care if he died? There was nothing for him to be upset about, nothing to make him look at Sasuke that way. Time and time again Naruto openly spouted that he hated Sasuke and Sasuke always replied in kind. Hatred and rivalry was what their entire relationship was built on, all it contained. So why the hell had he been so worried about Sasuke? That look Naruto had given him, as their eyes connected and unspoken thoughts were shared between them… It was obvious Naruto had been worried for him, plain how much of an effect Sasuke’s rescue attempt had had on him. Sasuke didn’t know what exactly had happened after he ‘died’, but it had been something huge and emotionally impactful, that much was obvious just from reading Naruto’s expression. Sasuke silently wondered what had gone through Naruto’s mind during the time he was out cold, floating in that state of limbo between the waking world and the one beyond. What sort of feelings, what sort of thoughts had Naruto experienced during that time to make him look at Sasuke that way? Because as much as he was loathe to admit it, just as Naruto had been worried for him, deep down Sasuke had been just as concerned over his teammate’s fate during that climactic battle.

But now Sasuke wished all that weird stuff in Tazuna’s house had just been some weird fever dream, a hallucination brought on by his stressed body as it recovered. That certainly wouldn’t have been ideal, dreaming about Naruto kissing him, but it was a much preferable alternative to the reality of the matter. The reality was a shocking mistake, a troubling loss of judgment that Sasuke was still struggling to deal with.

How the hell was he supposed to act around the idiot now? How should you deal with someone after that kind of thing happened between you? This was an area of study that Sasuke had no knowledge in whatsoever. This was far worse than their accidental kiss back at the Academy classroom. That had definitely made Sasuke uncomfortable and distressed as well, but this situation was ten thousand times worse to deal with! What should he do, what should he say? ...No, no, he shouldn't do or say _anything_ , Sasuke finally settled the matter effectively after much studious thought. He should just ignore it entirely. Pretend nothing had happened, that was the best course of action. Yes, he would ignore Naruto, just like usual. Nothing had happened, nothing at all worth worrying about, so he should just keep things normal and on the level. Naruto was just an annoying loser teammate and Sasuke had only been doing his duty as a member of Team 7 protecting him. Whatever reasons Naruto had for kissing him were unimportant now; there were more pressing things to attend to, like their mission today, so it was best to just quickly drop the matter and move on. No need to overreact about it. Sasuke knew he could keep his cool and pretend none of this ever happened, forget all this weirdness and go back to their usual spiteful relationship. The only question was if Naruto could do the same. Would Naruto even be smart enough to brush all this off and move forward? Sasuke couldn’t help but worry that Naruto would bring it up when Team 7 got together later today, actually dare to spout the subject aloud. How the hell would he deal with it if Naruto was that dense?

“Get it together,” Sasuke told himself, smacking his cheeks with the palms of his hands to force himself to wake up from this bizarre, Naruto induced freak-out. Sasuke hadn’t felt this way in a very long time… He was unused to being this out of it, this overwhelmed and burdened by his own feelings, making him feel more stressed than he had been in quite a while. This was definitely going to be a stressful mission.

***

The genin of Team 7 stood grouped together impatiently watching their sensei stroll down the road at an agonizingly slow pace. Right now the man was too preoccupied reading from the book in his hand with big ‘Not for Children!’ and ‘18+ Only!’ warnings blatantly visible on the cover to pay his students any mind. This guy was so shameless, reading his smut out in broad daylight on a public street where everyone walking by could see what he was up to. And in front of children no less!

“Hurry up, Kakashi-sensei!” Naruto shouted down the road at his teacher. That lazy jounin was too busy enjoying his so-called ‘romance novel’ to even _try_ to get interested in their newly assigned mission, walking so slowly with his nose buried deep in that stupid book that Naruto was sure an old tortoise would have been moving faster.

“Calm down, I’m just getting to the good part,” Kakashi called back carelessly, completely unbothered by his student’s complaints. “Oh my!” he mumbled in delight, coming to a passage in his book that he seemed to find _very_ interesting, and then the white haired jounin started to chuckle heartily in a distinctly perverted manner as he marveled enthusiastically at the words written on the page.

“Ugh! Would you put down that trash already and pay attention to us, sensei?!” Naruto cried out in frustrated anguish. Wasn’t a teacher supposed to actually, you know, _teach_? These poor young people had the bad luck to be stuck with a sensei that preferred to read trashy novels and sleep in late over doing his real job. No matter how strong and brave a shinobi Kakashi really was at heart, it was still a pain dealing with his slacker attitude.

“Trash?!” Kakashi yelled out in shock at hearing Naruto's slanderous words, quickly slapping the book shut and giving his student the evil eye for the awful insult to his beloved novel. “I’ll have you know that this is a masterpiece of literature about the trials of intimacy and romance, not trash!” he stated matter-of-factly.

Sasuke sighed deeply as he watched Kakashi try to defend his taste in literature to Naruto, shaking his head in disbelief at the sorry sight. _Just how did this guy ever become a jounin in the first place? He’s so careless and brainless sometimes; he kinda reminds of Naruto in a way._ Kakashi was amazing, that was indisputable. But he was also not at all like what Sasuke imagined a jounin to be like. “For once I agree with Naruto,” Sasuke called out wearily at his arguing teammate and sensei, who were glaring at each other as if Kakashi was trying to get Naruto to understand his love of those dirty books through sheer willpower alone and Naruto was trying to rush Kakashi along all the same. “We really should get a move on before we’re late,” Sasuke informed his sensei, trying to present a united front against Kakashi’s time wasting dilly dallying, hoping such an effort would prod the man along. Patience was not Sasuke’s strong suit, especially when he had to put up with these two idiots. His outward expression might have appeared calm as ever at the moment, but on the inside he was just as frustrated as Naruto was.

“Hmph!” Kakashi scoffed, still obviously offended by his student’s lack of understanding despite a rebuke from from the two of them. The only times the masked man seemed to take anything in life seriously were when it came to his comrades or his smutty books. The first was what made him such a cool and inspirational leader to his students. The second made him a dirty minded slacker that caused the genin no end of annoyances, however. “Brats like you just couldn’t understand why a book like this is so great,” Kakashi insisted, continuing to resist any efforts to speed him along. “You two are just inexperienced little twerps who have probably haven't even had your first kiss yet, let alone ever been in an intimate, passion filled kind of love. Come back to me when you’ve actually grown up and you’ve got some chest hair on you or something as proof of your maturity and you’ll see just how right I was about this book. I would know much better than you kids what is trash, and this definitely isn't trash,” the jounin replied dramatically, pointing his finger accusingly at his two young male students.

“Who cares if we’ve never gotten kissed before! What matters is that you’re taking up so much time that we won’t even be able to _start_ the mission before sundown, let alone finish! I don’t care about intimacy or passion or chest hair or any weird stuff like that, I just want to get on with the mission, sensei!” Naruto ranted impatiently, obviously not in a good mood for once this morning. Sasuke stood next to the frustrated blond, quietly nodding in agreement with his arms folded in a look of disapproval aimed at Kakashi. He wouldn’t have yelled it out so obnoxiously loud, but he did agree in general with Naruto’s statement, a rare occurrence for the two rivals who seemed to conflict on nearly everything.

“Huh?” Sakura questioned from the sidelines all of a sudden, roused from her own quietly boiling irritation with Kakashi’s slowness by something Naruto had said and finally jumping into the conversation. “But haven’t you both already had your first kiss? Remember, back in the Academy when you guys-”

Both Naruto and Sasuke’s eyes suddenly and simultaneously flew wide open in horror, the startled boys quickly realizing exactly where Sakura was going with this. No, no, no, no! Sakura _couldn't_ have seriously been bringing that up. That was ancient history, something they both had promised to themselves to forget. There was no way she was going to spill the beans about that kiss back at the Academy, that was just a horrible accident after all! But she was, both boys realized in terror that Sakura really, seriously was going to say it out loud to their sensei! With as awkward as they were feeling around each other considering what had happened between them in the Land of Waves, those crazy actions that they both had made out of worry and fear and other strange emotions, the memory of that awkward accidental kiss back at the Academy was exactly the _last_ thing either of them wanted to be reminded of right now! Sasuke and Naruto were too self-conscious to even look each other in the eye today lest they be reminded of their uncharacteristically gentle interactions on the previous mission, they seriously didn’t need to also be reminded of their ridiculous unwanted first kiss to add to this air of weirdness hovering between them!

Naruto and Sasuke both moved together in mirrored unison, both boys knowing exactly what they needed to do at this moment, bringing their hands up to Sakura’s mouth lightning quick to forcibly halt her absurd but truthful confession. Naruto rapidly cupped his hand over Sakura's mouth before she had a chance to finish her statement and Sasuke’s hand landed on top of Naruto’s just instants later to further seal her silence, ensuring that their humiliating secret would be safe from Kakashi.

“What the heck is with you guys today?” Kakashi asked, raising an eyebrow at his students who were acting so rashly and unusually. Just what was Sakura talking about and why did the boys want to hush her up so badly? Sasuke and Naruto were both acting very different today; Kakashi noticed that they hadn't challenged or yelled at each other even once yet since the four of them had all met up. In fact, if anything the normally contentious duo had seemed to be avoiding each other entirely today until Naruto had started shouting at Kakashi to hurry up. The jounin noted to himself that the boys had indeed been acting very oddly, not even greeting each other with their customary insults. Heck, they hadn’t even _looked_ at each other so far today. Kakashi knew that something was definitely up.

“We, uh… We both just think that it’s important to save your first kiss for someone you really care about,” Sasuke quickly thought up an at least half-plausible lie, his hand still resting firmly on top of Naruto’s to ensure that Sakura shut up about the truth of the matter.

“Yeah, yeah!” Naruto agreed perhaps a bit too enthusiastically, trying to add credence to Sasuke’s quick thinking. “Me and Sasuke both talked it over once before back at the Academy and we found out that we thought the same thing. See, it’s important to have your first kiss be with someone you actually like, right Kakashi-sensei? That way it’s more special! That’s what Sakura was talking about, how we both want to wait to find someone special before we have our first time!” _Please buy this, please buy this,_ Naruto chanted over and over to himself as he thought up the best fib he could.

“Exactly!” Sasuke exclaimed, swiftly taking the reigns of their growing mutual lie back from Naruto. “So because of those feelings we just can’t understand why you like those books so much, since they seem so impersonal and fleeting to us. It’s not that we’re criticizing what you like, it’s just that that stuff isn’t for us, that’s all we’re saying.” _We are so sunk,_ Sasuke convinced himself despairingly. _Even Kakashi isn’t airheaded enough to fall for this dumb excuse. I really don’t want anyone else to know what happened back then, especially not an adult. If an adult finds out they'll misunderstand and start saying all kinds of creepy things, and I REALLY don’t want to deal with all that._ Adults always jumped to weird conclusions and never understood things properly. They often got strange ideas in their heads that weren't the whole truth. If an adult found out that Naruto and Sasuke had kissed they would probably think the boys were in love or something crazy like that, call it ‘cute’ or 'adorable' or something equally nauseating. Adults just never understood the truth. And that was a whole boatload of awkwardness that Sasuke could do without.

“Hmmm,” Kakashi contemplated, staring down suspiciously at the two boys who were both sweating profusely in their moment of nervous tension, desperate to keep the truth from getting free. They seriously didn’t want Kakashi to learn of their secret shame. It was awful enough that the whole class–minus Iruka who happened to be out of the room at the time–had seen them kiss, no one else needed to know what had happened back then, Naruto and Sasuke certainly didn't need to experience that shame all over again.

“You guys…” Kakashi started to say, closely inspecting his students and their bizarre attitudes this afternoon as they still diligently held Sakura's mouth shut. They were obviously lying, that much was sure. Kakashi wasn’t as big an idiot as these kids seemed to think he was, and something was obviously very different about Sasuke and Naruto today. Kakashi just wasn’t sure exactly what they were lying about or why. _Well, even kids need their secrets, I suppose,_ the sensei thought with a confused huff. He had a few pieces of a mysterious new puzzle before him, curious to find out how they all came together in the end, but he couldn't yet see how they fit. Something was definitely off with Naruto and Sasuke, something about their attitudes and the way they interacted seemed different all of a sudden to his keen eyes, but instead of needlessly prying, Kakashi decided instead to let the matter drop for the time being and see if any more pieces fell into place. He would find out what was going on eventually, though; this was far too interesting to pass up not knowing about. Plus it was a good chance to annoy his students, which was always a fun distraction from tedious missions. “...That’s actually pretty noble of you two!” the white haired man continued on after a moment in deep thought, flashing an approving grin that was just barely visible underneath his mask. It was a fake gesture, but he was good at manipulating these kids, so they probably couldn’t tell.

“...Huh?” both boys questioned after a moment of silence, completely stupefied that their shoddy spur of the moment lie had actually worked so well.

“Kids your age are usually so excited to start trying those kinds of things as soon as possible,” the sensei explained nonchalantly to his young wards. “It’s refreshing to see young men with such high standards and morals. I guess I judged you two wrong after all. You’re both right, finding someone you care about and are compatible with _is_ more important than some silly fling. I never thought you two would ever agree on something, count me as surprised!” Kakashi replied merrily, for some reason put in a good mood by their blatant lie, or at least so he pretended. “Alright then you guys, let's go complete our mission!” he proclaimed, his attitude completely reversed from just a few minutes ago. The white haired jounin suddenly picking up his pace and walked off towards their destination much quicker than before, leaving his three students standing behind wallowing in their confusion.

Sasuke and Naruto both let out huge sighs of relief as their nosy sensei walked away. Their secret embarrassment was thankfully still contained, for now at least… However, Sakura was so irritated at being forcefully silenced that she raised her fist high into the air and smacked it down hard as she could right on top of Naruto’s head with a loud _thud_ , sending the boy crashing to the ground and freeing the hands formerly glued to the girl's mouth.

“Ouch! Why just me, Sakura?! Sasuke did it too!” Naruto whined in pain.

“Don’t ever do that again or I’ll make you wish you’d never been born!” she raged back at the confused boy, taking deep breaths in and out now that she was finally able to breathe through her mouth again, before she promptly turned to question Sasuke over the matter. “I don’t get it though, why did you want to keep that a secret from Kakashi so badly?”

“The fewer people who know, the better,” Sasuke mumbled back in miserable agony. Ideally no one would have ever found out about that accident, but unfortunately it had been in public, so all they could do was just try to keep that insane fluke occurrence from leaking out into wider public knowledge.

“And _I_ don’t get why you would even want to tell Kakashi-sensei, Sakura!” Naruto shouted back at her from his position on the ground, completely tired of this whole situation already. Everything going on already today with Kakashi, Sakura… and Sasuke too, it was all just too much for him to handle right now. Boy did he ever just want to go home, eat some ramen, and take a good nap!

“It wasn’t that big of a deal, it was just an accident after all. It’s not like you have to hide it or anything,” Sakura shrugged, showing a completely opposite opinion on the matter than she had back when it had happened. “On the _other_ hand, though, sometimes I still feel like killing you for doing that to Sasuke, Naruto!” Sakura rapidly shifted moods closer to what she had felt back in the Academy classroom and yelled out violently, shaking an angry fist at Naruto, who flinched and moved to protect his head from any more of her aggressive outbursts.

“It’s not like I wanted to kiss that jerk, I told you I just slipped is all! I wouldn’t kiss this bastard even if someone paid me with all the ramen in the world!” Naruto exclaimed with certainty, trying to defend himself on this matter once more as he clambered up from the dirt as began dusting himself off.

“Same here. It was so gross I almost puked,” Sasuke spat with a glare cast towards Naruto, causing Sakura to giggle at their overly sensitive rebukes for some reason.

“You took the words right outta my mouth! That was by far the worst thing that’s ever happened to me in my whole life!” Naruto cried out, returning an equally hateful glare back at Sasuke.

“Oh, you guys are both being ridiculous. It was an accident, you should just get over it already,” Sakura insisted. “Anyways, it was just that once, it’s not like you did it again. You should just pretend it never happened and ignore it, like the way I do whenever Naruto talks to me.” The feisty kunoichi then let out a laugh and ran to catch up with Kakashi, leaving the two boys behind to soak in their misery.

“Hey! That’s mean, Sakura!” Naruto shouted after her in offense and dismay at her comment. _Get over it? That’s a funny joke coming from her,_ Naruto thought, rubbing the sore spot on his head all the while; he was certain that a big bump would soon sprout from where the violent girl had pummeled him yet again. Sakura and the rest of Sasuke’s stupid fan club had trashed him once before, after he had fallen and inadvertently kissed that bastard, even though Naruto had never meant to and had tried to explain to them that it wasn't on purpose, and now he had gotten beaten up for that accident once again. Sakura telling them it wasn’t a big deal certainly was hypocritical of her. She seemed more angry about what had happened back then than either of them were anymore. More than angry, the two boys were… troubled, disturbed by the whole incident, both longing to put it all behind them. They were trying their hardest to forget that it had ever even occurred in the first place… To mixed success at best. Yes, it was hard to forget something like that, something that had started such a wild chain of events…

As he stood rubbing the painful lump rising fast on his head, Naruto froze all of a sudden, realizing something very scary. Sakura was wrong, though luckily for Naruto’s brain she didn’t know it; he and Sasuke actually _had_ kissed again after all. And not just once, but _twice_! And those were no accidents, Naruto definitely didn’t slip on those occasions. For whatever misguided reasons, he had meant to do it, both of those times as he looked down on Sasuke’s wounded body. Those were no mere accidents or mishaps. Worry and fear began to surge in Naruto’s belly like a rising pool of lava. What if Kakashi had actually seen them do that after all? Had Sakura seen and now she was just casually playing it off? No, that wasn’t very likely, but still! They had been so careless, so insanely reckless! No one could find out about those emotionally misguided kisses Naruto had given Sasuke while he was recovering, ever, ever, ever!

Naruto slowly turned his head and took a fearful look over at Sasuke, who himself took an equally unsteady glance back at Naruto. He was obviously thinking about the same thing. Their eyes locked for a brief moment. They both seemed to be silently saying ‘Don’t tell or I’ll fucking kill you!’ to each other at that moment, making sure that they were both sworn to absolute secrecy. That was something they had to keep under wraps no matter what. The two nervous boys continued staring each other down awkwardly, the first time they had actually looked at each other so far today, unsure what to do or say at the moment with all the strange tension recently added to their relationship.

“Hurry up, you guys!” Sakura called out to them from afar, causing them to finally break their quiet, abnormal gaze, Sasuke letting out an irked scoff and Naruto grumbling unhappily under his breath as they tore away from the needlessly long gesture. Both Naruto and Sasuke wore expressions of dissatisfaction and annoyance as they ran to meet up with the rest of their team. But both their faces were also stained with a warm rosy color that was spreading rapidly across their cheeks, subtly confirming the conflict and discord going on in their young hearts.

***

Naruto had been unusually quiet during most of today’s mission, noticeably less amped up and rambunctious than he always seemed to be. Sasuke wasn’t pleased with himself for noticing this fact, but it was something that was hard to miss considering the absence of excited shouts and proclamations and challenges being flung at him by that typically noisy idiot. Following their awkward conversation with Kakashi and Sakura while the team made their way to the designated location for the mission, Sasuke had tried his best to ignore Naruto like he had promised himself he would do earlier that morning, keeping as physically far away from Naruto as possible and focusing his mind entirely on the mission. Luckily, Naruto seemed to have no problems with this arrangement, the oddly silent blond seemingly also avoiding Sasuke all that he could. The only time at all today they had engaged with each other was protesting Kakashi’s obnoxious dawdling and interrupting Sakura’s insane outburst about their embarrassing secret. After that, not a single word directed at the other came from either of the boys; they both talked to the other two members of Team 7, but avoided each other like they were invisible, neither overly proud guy giving even so much as a muttered insult or quick, angry glare to the other.

But for some reason, even as he tried to pay Naruto no mind and do his work in peace without being pestered by him for once, Sasuke’s attention kept getting drawn back to the loser as they went about their assigned tasks. Time and time again during the mission he caught himself covertly looking at Naruto from afar. Somehow Kakashi and Sakura couldn’t notice it, but weirdly enough Sasuke did: Naruto was acting different today. It wasn't just his abnormal quietness, there seemed to be something off about him, something Sasuke couldn’t precisely explain. He just looked so… unhappy or something today, like there was something bugging him or something was wrong. Noticing that odd fact caused Sasuke to curiously look more and more often in Naruto's direction throughout the day, moving carefully so that Naruto or the rest of the team wouldn’t catch him and accuse him of worrying. Sasuke couldn't take his gaze off of Naruto for too long, occasionally taking a sideways glance or quick peek out the corner of his eye as Naruto calmly and unenthusiastically completed his own assigned tasks. It was annoying as hell, but Sasuke couldn’t help himself from doing it, couldn’t deny his interest. Something was definitely up with Naruto, but whether it was due to all the unspoken weirdness hovering between them recently or something else entirely, Sasuke didn’t know for sure.

“...Hey, jerk?” Naruto suddenly called out to Sasuke after the team had broken up and went their separate ways after finishing up their mission. Sakura and Kakashi had already left, and Sasuke and Naruto were just about to part ways as well, the two boys walking along together in tense, uneasy silence as they each headed back to their own empty home until Naruto unexpectedly halted Sasuke as he turned to leave.

“What do you want, loser?” Sasuke questioned with irritation, not at all in a good mood today and full of shame brought on by his Naruto-induced panic attack earlier that morning not to mention his repeated concerned peeking throughout the day. He had been trying to avoid Naruto today, trying to stay as far away from him as possible and not get drawn into any pointless confrontations, but all that had blown up in his face. If Naruto started something now Sasuke wasn’t to be held responsible if he retaliated. He was in no mood to pull his punches today. Sadly, it seemed Naruto’s unusual quietness had run out its lifespan just when Sasuke was getting used to the serenity on Team 7 without Naruto's loud mouth wrecking everything. Sasuke supposed it was back to the usual annoying Naruto then.

Sasuke stopped dead in his tracks and whirled around to take a good hard look at Naruto, ready to give his comrade a piece of his mind. But the black haired boy was surprised to find he was wrong after all; the usual Naruto still was off on vacation far away, replaced by this strangely timid, quiet duplicate. The Naruto before him seemed to be very uncomfortable at the moment, shifting awkwardly in place and trying hard not to look Sasuke in the eye, shyly staring down at his shoes as if they were the most interesting things in the world. Naruto's hands were thrust in his pockets as he tediously kicked the dirt around, an oddly mellow appearance for Naruto. “...You wanna, I dunno… come over to my place for dinner or somethin’?” he mumbled without much of his normal confidence or energy.

As he studied Naruto’s atypical behavior today, the blond’s decidedly reserved and shy attitude, a light bulb suddenly clicked on in Sasuke’s brain. He had been right all along, his senses weren't wrong and he hadn't misinterpreted anything as he watched Naruto from afar, something actually _was_ wrong with Naruto today. Sasuke knew almost immediately what was the matter from his own personal experience with this sort of thing; Naruto must have been having one of _those_ days. That explained everything perfectly, his abnormal shyness, his quietness, his aversion to interaction today. Sasuke himself knew those kind of days well, knew precisely how they felt and how they presented themselves. Sometimes there were certain days that rolled around which just made you feel more isolated, more empty, more depressed than other normal days did. They didn’t happen for any real reason and didn’t seem to have any kind of trigger. You couldn’t predict when they would occur and you couldn't do anything to prevent them; they just showed up unannounced, weighing you down with feelings of sadness and emptiness. Sometimes you just woke up and inherently knew that today wasn’t going to be a good day for you, one of those days that seemed like a struggle to even get out of bed. Sasuke had had many of those kinds of days long ago after the death of his parents and betrayal of his brother. They were hard to deal with and harder still to overcome.

From the look of him, Naruto seemed to be having one of those bad days today. He probably felt even more lonely now than he usually did, so much so that he would even ask Sasuke, his sworn enemy, for some company. But being with _anyone_ was better than being all alone on those kind of days, Sasuke knew that very well. You just wanted someone to notice you, someone to talk to and be with for a while so you didn’t feel so all alone in the world. Sasuke himself understood this feeling first hand and also knew how much it probably wounded Naruto’s pride to ask him for the favor. But when you needed company and were desperate to shut out your crushing negative feelings, _anyone_ would do, anyone to block out the loneliness. Even if it was someone you didn’t even like all that much, it was still better than being completely on your own. Sasuke understood this as well and at the moment he truly and honestly didn’t look down on or blame Naruto for asking for his company; being alone was a tough thing to bear and not everyone could handle it as well as Sasuke did, how Sasuke _learned_ to do.

“...I guess,” Sasuke replied to Naruto’s invitation with an indifferent shrug, trying to keep everything normal between the two of them and pretend that Naruto didn't look as feeble as he really did. Under normal circumstances he would have said no a thousand times over, but… If Naruto really was feeling that depressed, well, how could Sasuke leave him hanging like that? He knew how badly loneliness hurt. Sure, he was annoying and Sasuke had been trying to avoid him, but even Naruto didn’t deserve to be treated with that much disdain if he really was in distress. Because if Sasuke had ever asked Naruto to return the same favor–he wouldn’t do that, since he had long ago accepted his situation in life, but just speaking hypothetically–and keep him company when he felt lonely, well… Sasuke hoped that Naruto would have moved passed their frictional relationship and done so as well. They might not have been friends, but… Sasuke believed that they did understand each other’s situations in life at least that much.

***

While the pair of boys leisurely walked to Naruto’s house, little of real importance was spoken between them besides what they should have to eat. Of course, Naruto unilaterally decided on ramen, despite the feeble protests put up by Sasuke, and he adamantly stuck by that decision no matter how hard Sasuke prodded him for anything else. In the end it made no real difference and after a while of wasted arguing with Naruto over the matter Sasuke easily gave in to his teammate's dietary wishes, since he just knew in his heart that–even though he had never been over to Naruto’s place to confirm it–Naruto definitely had little else than a stockpile of ramen in his kitchen. Naruto didn’t seem like a person who was very handy in the kitchen or who could make more than a few basic meals in any case, so Sasuke realized hoping for anything else had probably been the wrong idea in the first place. So ramen it was for them then.

“Man, what a pigsty,” Sasuke declared upon entering Naruto’s bedroom, wrinkling his nose in disgust as the particularly unpleasant scent of sweaty clothes and old food wafted into his nose. He hadn’t exactly been expecting a sparkling-clean palace, but somehow it was even worse than what Sasuke had foreseen. A small mountain of dirty laundry sat begging to be washed piled up off in the corner and all kinds of colorful snack packages and drink bottles littered the floor, making it hard for Sasuke to find a safe path to walk through the veritable garbage dump. A tower of old empty ramen cups was piled up precariously in the garbage can, stacked up so high that Sasuke was legitimately surprised that they hadn’t tumbled over yet. The garbage can itself was badly overstuffed, spewing out all manner of plastic and cardboard filth onto the ground around it, along with a handful of wadded up tissue balls mixed in to boot, a sight which made Sasuke slightly bashful and surprised-he was no innocent child anymore, he knew _exactly_ what Naruto had used those for, and it certainly wasn't to blow his nose. Didn't this looser have any shame, leaving things like that out in the open? On the wall beside Naruto's bed hung a sheet of paper proudly displaying the words ‘Defeat Sasuke!’ which were written in Naruto’s messy handwriting, and beneath that proclamation was an insultingly bad, goofy-looking caricature of Sasuke, through whether it was intentionally drawn poorly as a small swipe at Sasuke or if Naruto just really had no talent when it came to art, Sasuke wasn’t entirely sure. This place... in one word it was nasty. Just how could Naruto put up with these living standards!?

“Well, _sorry_ it’s not up to your standards, _Your Majesty_. If you don’t like it then go home,” Naruto spat back, his voice dripping with acidic sarcasm.

“No way. You said we were going to have something to eat, so I expect you to be a proper host, loser. Or are you not capable of being civil and treating your guests politely?” Sasuke carelessly waved off his rebuttal. Naruto had asked him here for a reason–even if the loser had tried to not make a big deal about it–so Sasuke had decided he could at least stay and have one cup of ramen, even if this apartment was pretty gross.

“Arg, you are such a stuck-up asshole sometimes,” Naruto replied with a grim, annoyed frown at Sasuke’s prim and proper attitude. You could just tell he was from a wealthy, respectable family by his needlessly obnoxious, overly pretentious actions and words. “But fine, whatever,” he quickly shrugged off his irritation with Sasuke’s formality and moved passed the insult with relative ease. “I’m going to go make the ramen, you stay here.”

“Wait, shouldn’t we eat in the kitchen?” Sasuke quickly questioned, eager to leave this fetid pit of rotting clothes and dirty dishes. Eating in this messy room was a bit too much to ask of a guest. There weren’t even a table or chairs to use in here, the few pieces of furniture around the room currently swarming with various junk.

“Eh heh heh heh,” Naruto laughed sheepishly at Sasuke’s question, rubbing the back of his head in a distantly flustered manner as he tried to explain his mess. “Well you seeeeee, the kitchen is actually even worse than in here, since I forgot to take out this week’s garbage... and I haven't really had the chance to do the dishes lately, either, sooooo…” Naruto trailed off open-endedly with a goofy embarrassed grin on his face. Well, at least he wasn’t _proud_ of his mess, there was some small amount of solace in that fact.

“Here’s fine then,” Sasuke rapidly replied, definitively settling the matter once and for all. Worse than _this_?! Was Naruto secretly a cockroach or a fly or something? Sasuke had never seen a mess so bad, he could hardly believe someone actually lived here. So yes, he would opt for the lest dirty room; Sasuke already felt like he needed a shower as it was, if he went someplace even worse than this then Sasuke just might have to burn his clothes afterwards.

After Naruto left the room to go prepare their meals, Sasuke delicately maneuvered his way through the maze of snack wrappers, piles of well-read manga, and dirty clothes littering the floor over to Naruto’s bed, trying hard not to step on anything along the way. Sasuke cautiously picked up a pair of Naruto’s boxers that were blocking him from sitting down in-between the tips of his thumb and forefinger–god he hoped these were clean–and tossed the underwear aside, carefully trying not to touch too much of the fabric as Sasuke reminded himself to thoroughly wash his hands once he got home; who knew if they were dirty or what Naruto had done with them, he seemed like the type to be lazy and wear the same nasty underwear for a week or two straight. The removal of the offending underpants allowed Sasuke to sit down on the surprisingly comfy mattress strewn with other various articles of Naruto’s discarded clothing.

Sasuke took a curious look around Naruto’s room while he waited for its occupant to come back, finding himself strangely interested in Naruto’s home life on his first visit here; he already knew Naruto was alone, but for some reason Sasuke was curious how Naruto dealt with all that. Everything here in this room, the calamitous mess, the assortment of manga and video games, it all spoke to the fact that Naruto lived by himself and relied on himself, something that was admirable, depressing, and oh too familiar to Sasuke all at once. Indeed, a room said a lot about its owner, the furniture, the decorations, the manner in which it was kept all spoke loudly about who lived there. But there were no pictures of family or friends and very few personal effects or mementos to be seen around the bedroom at all. This was somewhat surprising to Sasuke; Naruto didn’t seem to own anything that he found particularly valuable or special to him, nothing prominently displayed for visitors to see. It was an oddly stark and dull room for such a stupidly bright and excitable fellow to reside in; it sharply contrasted with his personality, so little of the ‘Naruto’ Sasuke knew peeking through the mostly plain and dower decorations, so few things firmly identifying this place as his. But then again, Naruto’s whole life could also be described that way, couldn’t it? A life of persecution and exclusion seemed ill-fitting to someone who seemed so happy all the time… Sasuke wasn’t blind, though, he saw how some of the other kids in their class treated Naruto, heard the things adults whispered about him from time to time. To outside eyes Naruto seemed to bear all the abuse he suffered with an unshakable determination and a mischievous grin, but even that loser must have had his limits to how much he could happily bear before even he too couldn’t help but get depressed about his sorry lot in life. The fact that Sasuke was even here in this room was proof enough of that. So maybe this room didn't mirror Naruto's personality, but rather his heart: cold, lonely, empty. Devoid of meaning and purpose, a place to fit into the world.

No, there was at least one thing of importance here, Sasuke at last realized as he continued to look around. Of all the scant few things in the room, the poster of a steaming bowl of ramen on the wall next to the bed, the potted plant happily soaking up sunshine in the window, the Leaf Village symbol emblazoned on a tapestry hanging above his bed, Sasuke thought this one particular thing said the most about Naruto: the one and only picture to be found in the room, the photograph that the members of Team 7 had taken together just after they had first been assigned together. That photo was nicely framed and placed on the bedside table very close to the bed, seemingly set there so that if Naruto were laying down he could look over and easily see it, see that last image of his teammates before he went to sleep. It seemed like it was vastly important to him. In Sasuke’s opinion it was the thing here that spoke the loudest about Naruto’s personality, about how proud he was to be a shinobi, how happy he was to have a team and no longer be alone in the world. No, on second thought this room wasn’t as cold or empty as Sasuke had first believed. It was just that Naruto didn’t have many memories to fill it up with yet, he was still collecting up things of importance to fill his hollow room and hollow life, so that he could one day, as he so often declared, become Hokage and earn people's respect and acceptance.

In the center of the room there was a noticeable small round table cluttered with an array of open books. Peeking over at their contents, Sasuke noticed they were all ninja handbooks and scrolls, detailing various techniques and methods of the shinobi. He inadvertently gave a small, approving smile at the unexpected sight; Naruto seemed to finally be taking his training seriously. Now that he thought about it, Naruto had seemed a lot stronger in the Land of Waves than Sasuke remembered him being back at the Academy. He had done an amazing job fighting against Zabuza and Haku, far beyond what Sasuke thought he was ever capable of. Those two weren’t easy enemies, even for Sasuke himself to deal with. ...But even so, Naruto was still about a hundred years too early to challenge Sasuke. _If you want to be my rival, you have to get a lot stronger than this, loser,_ Sasuke silently encouraged. He almost felt a sense of pride in Naruto’s growth, that the goofball had actually started to shape up. Almost.

“That’s a really weird look, Sasuke,” Naruto remarked upon returning to his room with a steaming ramen cup in each hand, seeing the unusual expression on his rival’s face as he stared at the furniture absentmindedly.

“Shut up, dumbass. I can look however I want,” Sasuke snapped back at him, his little smile rapidly melting away along with any thoughts of congratulations towards Naruto as he came back to reality. _What am I thinking? Once a loser, always a loser,_ Sasuke thought, rolling his eyes as he wondered how he ever thought this idiot could become a good ninja.

“Yeah, yeah. Here,” Naruto sighed with resignation, for once completely avoiding trying to start a fight as he held out the ramen cup in his left hand towards Sasuke. His hunger seemed to be overpowering his feelings of annoyance towards Sasuke at the moment. Or maybe it was something else...

Sasuke stared down at the steaming cup in Naruto’s grasp cautiously, suspiciously analyzing its contents. Maybe he was just being overly paranoid since he was in such unfamiliar settings, but… _He wouldn't… Would he?_ There was never such a thing as being too cautious when it came to food safety and Naruto _did_ claim to hate him after all. It wasn’t that much of a leap of faith to imagine all the terrible things he could have done to that ramen, hoping Sasuke would eat it so he could watch in malicious glee.

Naruto grew ever more frustrated as the seconds ticked by and Sasuke still didn’t take the cup from him, the raven haired jerk staring down at the hot food like it were poison or something. “...What? Do you think you’re too good for cup ramen, huh, Uchiha prince?!” Naruto suddenly exploded impatiently at him after almost a whole minute had passed by and Sasuke had still made no move to take his food from Naruto. This stuck-up jackass, daring to look down on him and his wonderful favorite food in his own home!

“...You didn’t spit in this or anything, did you?” Sasuke fearfully asked out of the blue, catching Naruto off guard.

“...What?! I would never ruin ramen that way! Ugh, either shut up and eat your ramen or stop bugging me and go home, jerk!” Naruto shouted back in offense, angrily shoving the cup into Sasuke’s hands before plopping down emphatically next to him on the bed, not even caring that he was sitting on top of one of his shirts that was probably none too clean.

_So you’re saying if it was something other than ramen, you would actually do that? That’s definitely reassuring,_ Sasuke thought grimly as he still suspiciously stared down at the steaming cup of noodles in his hand. ...Well, at least they were having ramen, so he was _probably_ safe from any harm; it was practically a holy food to Naruto after all. Still not entirely convinced of his own safety, Sasuke began tentatively eating his ramen, careful watching Naruto from the corner of his eye to make sure the blond didn't suddenly jump up and say 'Ha ha, I actually peed in yours!' or something just as revolting just as Sasuke took a bite, but Naruto only went on happily chowing down next to him, noisily eating his favorite meal in a haste, as if they were in an undeclared race to see who finished first. For a long time after this neither of them said anything more, the only noise in the room the sound of noodles being slurped and chewed by the two rivals. The calm of that oddly peaceful moment between them was soon shattered by Naruto, however.

“Ugh, damn,” the blond genin quietly grunted in irritation all of a sudden as he shifted back and forth in place uncomfortably, rubbing his inner thighs together in an odd display like he really had to pee or something. Sasuke was starting to seriously get annoyed by all Naruto’s weird random movements, since all the loser’s wiggling about was making Sasuke’s ramen slosh around in the cup like a hot tidal wave threatening to spill over onto his lap.

“...Crap, I can’t take it anymore!” Naruto hoarsely whispered after a while more of his obnoxious squirming, obviously very frustrated with something and unable to sit still. Sasuke curiously watched with an eyebrow raised as Naruto set his almost empty ramen cup down on the floor, wondering just what was going on with the idiot. This would certainly turn out to be an unfortunate case of ‘curiosity killed the cat’, though. Sasuke sat by and bore witness to the horrible unexpected scene as Naruto unceremoniously undid his pants button and without so much as a warning for Sasuke to look away  abruptly slipped his hand passed his waistline into his underpants. Naruto had actually stuck his hand down into his underwear in plain view, the blond’s hand then moving rapidly back and forth in his pants as he groaned in irritation.

“...DON’T SCRATCH YOUR BALLS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, YOU TOTAL DUMBASS!” Sasuke cried out in shock and disgust at the sight, his brain finally comprehending what was going on, sadly too late to be spared the image of Naruto with his hand down his pants. Sasuke was totally disturbed and flabbergasted to see this flagrant boundaries-smashing action, he had no idea just what to do or how to react in a moment like this. This moron didn’t even seem to care that Sasuke was sitting literally right next to him while he had his idiot hand down his pants! Naruto was itching his nuts right in front of someone like a dumb animal! What kind of complete freak did that, who had that little common sense?

“I can’t help it, it really itches!” Naruto pathetically defended himself, his hand still furiously working away inside his trousers trying to sate that annoying itch on his scrotum that wouldn't go away. “It’s not my fault, I’m a guy, it just happens sometimes. It was bugging me so much, if I didn’t scratch it soon I was gonna die!” he wildly proclaimed with absolute certainty of his fate.

“Jeez, I can’t believe how stupid you are sometimes!” Sasuke exclaimed despondently, quickly turning his head away from the sorry sight so he wouldn’t have to watch Naruto soothe his itchy privates anymore. But it was far too late, he had already seen enough of that to make himself queasy. Not only was Naruto an idiot, but he was gross to boot! He had no tact, no self-awareness, and no respect for personal boundaries!

“Ahhh, that's much better!” Naruto happily sighed after a few more moments of contentious scratching, withdrawing his hand from his crotch and re-buttoning his pants once he had finished solving his little problem.

“Ugh, thanks for the info, you dumbass,” Sasuke moaned in agonized disgust. Why did stuff like this always happen to him? Why was he alone cursed to suffer Naruto’s ridiculous whims?

“...Hey Sasuke, are you getting hair down there, too?” Naruto courageously asked after another long period of tense weirdness between them, both of the boys quickly finishing up their ramen, then sitting silently next to each other in complete silence for a while, Sasuke still refusing to look back towards Naruto all the while just in case he got another inopportune itch. But even though Naruto asked this random personal question seemingly out of the blue, he actually already knew the answer from back when he had peeked on Sasuke in the bathtub at Tazuna’s house in the Land of Waves; Naruto remembered that Sasuke had about the same amount of pubes that he did, a fuzzy little patch of curly black hairs steadily growing above his penis and a few lonely strays on his ball sack. Naruto was just asking now because after Sasuke's poor reaction to his itchy issue Naruto realized how much fun it would be throwing Sasuke off his guard and making him embarrassed, how much he would thoroughly enjoy seeing Sasuke squirm in uncomfortable awkwardness when confronted with these kinds of personal topics; they seemed to be a weak spot for Sasuke, something he had trouble addressing, which made Naruto want to poke at the topic even more. Sasuke was such a stuck-up prude all the time, how could Naruto resist having a little fun at his expense? Any way he could have the upper hand in their rivalry was fine by Naruto, even if it was just something simple like making Sasuke tense and ashamed with some talk about private matters.

“Jeez, what an inappropriate conversation for dinner,” Sasuke scoffed and shook his head in disbelief, but his face was noticeably heating up, something Naruto found evil delight in causing. Sasuke shifted awkwardly, obviously put-off by Naruto’s invasive words and actions, before he nervously cleared his throat and reluctantly spoke again. “...B-But, uh, yeah I am… I just think you shouldn’t be scratching your balls in front of people. It’s gross.”

“Why not? It’s just you, it’s not like I care about your opinion about what I do. You have balls too, don’t act like you never itch 'em.” Naruto smiled mischievously to himself after saying this. Sasuke was being unusually forthright about his personal matters. He must be feeling very flustered and bewildered at the moment, completely dazed that Naruto was asking him about his private matters of puberty and unsure how to react. Man was this fun!

“Yeah, but I don’t go around unbuttoning my pants and scratching my nuts in public, because unlike you, I’m not a total moron!” Sasuke loudly complained, sounding more offended that he probably intended to let on. He was obviously getting worked up by all this personal guy talk Naruto was pushing on him, getting very weirded out about this unusual conversation about their pubes and itchy testicles. But then again boys would be boys, crude and curious in equal measure.

“Jeez, you sound just like Sakura,” Naruto bemoaned Sasuke's uptight attitude. “The other day I had an itch while we were out on a mission, so I went to scratch it and she totally flipped out and almost about killed me, saying it was gross or whatever. But it’s not like I can help it! When they itch, you gotta itch ‘em or you’ll die, just like I said!” Naruto replied with a chuckle.

“You’re such a little kid sometimes,” Sasuke sighed despairingly. Naruto was so childish at times and he had no self-awareness, no sense of privacy or consideration for others whatsoever. Between his shrimpiness and his excitable, over the top manner it wasn’t all that hard to mistake Naruto for being younger than he really was. “I bet you don’t even know how to masturbate yet,” Sasuke blurted out as a stabbing insult to Naruto's maturity before he could even realize just what he had said, how ridiculous and invasive the remark actually was. Now _Sasuke_ was being the one with no sense of privacy, not even meaning to do it either, just saying the first thing that came to his mind.

“Yes I do!” Naruto angrily shouted back, deeply insulted by this affront to his masculinity from his eternal competition. “I do it all the ti-” Naruto suddenly caught himself before he could finish his thought, realizing just what he had admitted to, the gravity of the situation he found himself in. Now it was Naruto’s turn to get embarrassed by their conversation matter, his face rapidly becoming fiery red with pure shame. He had humiliated himself in front of his rival, the last person in the world he would want to make an ass of himself in front of, unintentionally falling for Sasuke's bait and owning up to such a private and personal thing.

Naruto and Sasuke tensely took a very brief glance at each other, each boy realizing that the other’s face was just as red hot and flushed as his own was. The pair quickly snapped their attention away from each other again upon seeing their embarrassment so plainly displayed, trying to avoid looking at each other's bright red faces, turning to stare at opposite ends of the room. Both of the boys knew exactly what this all meant in that moment. They knew definitively that they had both become young men, that they had stepped out the door of innocence into a new world of wet dreams, awkward boners, pubic hair, and of course the favorite sport of the teen male, masturbation. Sasuke and Naruto knew immediately on looking at the other’s shocked face that they both had participated in a little ‘self enjoyment’, that the act was no mystery to either of them. They could each tell the truth just from the remarkable overt reaction the other gave off. Actually admitting you did that shameful thing to another guy for the first time, well, it was pretty unnerving. And awkward and relieving and a whole host of other weird emotions too. It was sort of a feeling of ‘Oh, he does it too? I guess I’m not the only one,’ a kind of silent, unusual camaraderie between males that lifted the shame and stigma off the act. But even considering that, it was still embarrassing as all hell to admit, especially since Naruto and Sasuke weren’t even actually friends, the pair ending up learning _way_ more about each other than they had ever expected to today.

_I can’t believe I said that!_ Sasuke lamented, woefully shy at the moment, totally unused to this kind of deeply personal talk with someone else. He had never had this kind of intimate talk between guys about these kinds of matters, so he was definitely a fish out of water at the moment, flopping on unfamiliar land. _Damn it Naruto, this is all your fault! Talking about all kinds of weird stuff…_ Naruto always had that effect on him, always threw him off so much. That loser never knew when to shut his mouth.

_Aw crap, what did I say?! I’m so stupid!_ Naruto howled in shame in his head, realizing he had pushed too far and engaged in friendly fire with his prodding, accidentally ended up making himself embarrassed together along with Sasuke. _I answered without even thinking. He’s probably going to make fun of me now!_ That definitely seemed like something Sasuke would do, mock him over admitting to something like this so easily, maybe he would say that only kids did it or something insulting like that.

Naruto and Sasuke, two thoroughly ashamed boys, sat side by side in a heavy atmosphere filled with unbelievable amounts of awkward tension. Both their faces were glowing bright red, both their hearts pounding wildly in their chests, their fear and nervous excitement uncontainable in a situation such as this. How should they deal with all this? Both young men had sought to avoid anything like this since their return from the Land of Waves, promised to avoid any more troubling entanglements at all costs, but their relationship always seemed to turn unusual and strange when it was just the two of them together. They just couldn’t escape this weird bond pulling them together into… whatever the hell this was, because it certainly wasn’t friendship! No way would they become friends, both boys swore this! They were rivals, enemies, they couldn’t ever be friends! ...But maybe they _could_ be… less antagonistic? Get along just a _little_ bit better, even if only in private? At the moment Naruto thought that might be okay, that it didn’t sound too bad at all. Sasuke too was currently considering if fighting a little less would be good for them, allow them to focus more energy on missions and getting stronger than on petty arguments. If they worked hard they could move passed all this strange nonsense and actually cooperate. Or at the least they could _try_ to get along better, bit by bit… Maybe. Just so long as they forgot what had happened, all the weird consequences and unforeseen events and unplanned actions that the two of them had experienced since becoming teammates. The only way forward for them was to fix that issue permanently, to definitively snuff off those creepy emotions that both Sasuke and Naruto were sharing like a candle light. But...

“...S-Sasuke…” Naruto called out after a very long time had gone by, both boys sitting in utter silence, rapidly analyzing the strange situation they found themselves in as a million thoughts all went running through their overwhelmed pubescent brains at once. “I think… it could be good practice for when we get girlfriends, so… do you want to do it again?” he chuckled awkwardly as he suggested the remarkable, the impossible, the revolting. Even Naruto couldn’t believe he had actually said it aloud. He was so disgusted with himself right now.

Sasuke instinctively knew exactly what Naruto was asking without any elaboration, felt a strange twinge deep in his gut just as soon as Naruto had said it. No. He should say no. He _had_ to say it. He should have punched Naruto right in the face for even bringing it up, Sasuke should have clobbered him for daring to suggest they do that most heinous act again. Sasuke didn’t want to think about that anymore, he had done enough panicking and rationalizing and worrying already. No. Why couldn't he just say no?!

“...Whatever,” Sasuke shrugged timidly in response, his face still on drenched in pink as he stared at Naruto’s empty wall. What the hell was he doing?! He should be hitting this idiot for even suggesting that, not going along with it!

He knew this was a huge mistake. But for some reason Sasuke just could stop himself, couldn’t pull himself back from this ledge before he tumbled over into the abyss that awaited him below. Once he fell off there would be no going back anymore, no denying it, no saving himself, he knew that. ...But he wanted this. He had no idea why, but right now, for whatever reason, for just this one moment, Sasuke wanted to be here… beside Naruto. Because Naruto was lonely. Because _they both_ were lonely. Because even if Sasuke refused to admit it to himself… he truly hated being alone.

Sasuke knew he was losing his common sense to this idiot, that Naruto was gradually destroying his carefully crafted image, his deeply held beliefs, his well-hammered will. What was Sasuke to do then? What _could_ he do? Just like when he had so mysteriously sought to save Naruto from Haku’s deadly attack, just like when he allowed Naruto to plant his dumb lips on his own, just like when Sasuke felt sorry for Naruto’s situation and came here in the first place, Sasuke again felt mysteriously, annoyingly, confusingly enthralled by that loser. They were connected in some strange way. Through hate and rivalry… through secret admiration and respect. Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzumaki were two people who seemed to never be able to escape each other, no matter how much they deeply wanted to… Or _thought_ they wanted to, _pretend_ they wanted to.

It was a very dumb idea. Both of them would agonize and panic over it later. It would cause them no end of worry and confusion. Both of these boys would be tormented by doing this act yet again when they each swore it was awful and disgusting and that they would never do again. But in this odd moment both Sasuke and Naruto found they wished to kiss again. That simple thing made them feel good and warm and happy. Like they were briefly connected to another person, like someone else in this harsh world cared for these two lonely young men. Their lives were tough and all too often unhappy. So was it really so terrible for them to want to reach out for a little human contact, even if the one who was on the other side was an annoying rival? Was it really so strange to desire to feel wanted and comforted by the warm lips and gentle embrace of another human being, to momentarily seek to feel less alone in the world, even if you lips were met by those of another guy, even if it was an act done together with a person you argued and fought with, even if it was weird and strange and deeply confusing and completely messed up? Was wanting a little bit of happiness and warmth for themselves, even if only for a few fleeting moments, was that really such a bad thing?

Boyish curiosity and youthful passion began overtaking their senses, clouding their better judgement and pushing Naruto and Sasuke towards this fateful action. Sasuke couldn’t help but recall how Naruto had looked earlier that day, so sad, so alone. He felt sorry for Naruto, empathized with his lot in life. He tried fighting it off, but Sasuke couldn’t deny that he didn’t hate Naruto so much anymore, once he had gotten to know him better; he might have been a loud idiot, but Naruto was also courageous and determined and kind, all of which were good qualities that Sasuke didn’t exactly fault. And at the same time Naruto was struggling with his own newfound respect for Sasuke. ...No, not new; he had admired Sasuke since long ago, it was an admiration that had been rediscovered due to recent events. Naruto tried so hard because Sasuke was a role model to him, someone to impress, someone to earn acceptance from. Sasuke might have been rough and not very nice most of the time, but Naruto knew there was some good inside him. Deep down Sasuke wasn’t really that bad of a guy at all. Both Sasuke and Naruto were being flooded with an array of new emotions, unable to contain their strange overwhelming feelings any longer. They hated each other, that was true. But more than that, they also _understood_ each other, without even having to say anything, both of them knowing loss and unhappiness and isolation all too well.

Sasuke who secretly sought connection. Naruto who secretly sought acceptance. What were the odds that these two would one day form this bizarre partnership? They both sought something in the other, something they lacked, something they respected, admired, desired. For better or worse, all the things that had happened to them and between them, since even long before they had been put together on Team 7, when they were little kids in Iruka’s classroom, everything that had happened so far had placed them here together in this room in this odd situation. It was an unspoken connection between them, one of secrets, of rivalry, of hate, of respect, of admiration, of confusion. If only they could ever admit their feelings to the other, to make their bond into a real, lasting, close friendship, what both of them truly sought deep down. ...So doing that absurd thing just once more wouldn’t be so bad, would it? Just once more would be fine…

Naruto and Sasuke slowly turned to face one another, a brief look of bewilderment and excitement exchanged between them. Each boy cautiously leaned in closer and closer towards the other, moving slowly towards the inevitable, until once again their lips brushed against each other. It was a slow, gentle impact, sensitive pink lips touching so warily, so fearfully. Warm, tingling sparks erupted as Naruto and Sasuke pressed their lips together deeper, lengthening their kiss, turning it more passionate, their eyes shut tight as they did this forbidden act, not imagining who they were kissing but simply enjoying the moment, basking in contact and companionship. They would certainly regret it later, but right now they were two lonely, stressed out, hormone-addled teen boys needing comfort; one would expect them to be pretty reckless when it came to things like this. Instantly as their lips connected together Sasuke and Naruto both somehow knew this would become a regular occurrence for them from here on, a quiet moment of content and good feelings separated from rivalry and mutual dislike to soothe their wounded hearts, if only for a moment.

This was a path they knew they shouldn’t be walking down. Neither of them knew just what lay down this twisting, confusing road created by their actions. Once they started down this road they would never be able to turn back, never be able to forget, never be able to truthfully say they had no connection to each other anymore. It was a long, scary, unknowable road into the dark. ...But even so, it was better to walk that kind of path with someone at your side. Even if you weren’t lovers or friends or anything like that, it was still worthwhile. Even if the other person was a loser… Even if the person by your side was a jerk… The path of loneliness was just too hard to deal with all alone.


	3. Conflicting Emotions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke continue to get gradually closer both emotionally and physically as time goes on, but this fact causes the boys no end of emotional stress as they struggle to find the right balance between rivalry and just whatever the heck is happening between them anymore. As the dangerous trials of the Chunin Exams dawn on Team 7, the young ninja must face frightening situations almost as nerve racking as their unspoken tangled feelings. Beset by emotions that conflict between jealousy and admiration, rivalry and camaraderie, both genin find themselves uncertain exactly which path they should choose and what will shape their bond as it continues forward into the unknown and they grow into experienced ninja.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we get to see not just the confused, concerned little kisses between Naruto and Sasuke from previous chapters, but some full-on, hot and sweaty making out action (and luckily some other fun stuff towards the end too). Hooray!
> 
> This chapter is about two weeks later than I originally intended to post it because I had some stuff come up and then after that I got sick, so I'm sorry for the lateness to anyone who was waiting eagerly. PLUS, my computer crashed while I was editing so I lost all my changes. 
> 
> Also I'm honestly not entirely pleased with the way this chapter turned out (Please still read it though! It's not bad, at least I HOPE it isn't, it's just that I'm a perfectionist and not satisfied with certain parts) but after going through and editing it about ten times I just couldn't figure out what was bugging me about it and decided to give up and post it already. So I will probably try to come back and edit this chapter more to my liking again in the future sometime, just a word to the wise, but comments and suggestions are especially welcome.

Naruto pressed his burning young body close up against Sasuke’s shirtless form, desperate for an ever more intense kiss with his rival. With his bare chest glued together against Sasuke’s own pale, toned torso Naruto could distinctly feel the vibrations of his partner’s heart beating wildly as the rivals feverishly kissed in a haze of erotic action. Or maybe that was just his own heart thundering excitedly in his chest, he wasn't so sure; it was so difficult to tell what was what when the two of them were wrapped up together like this, so easy to mistake what pleasurable feelings and reactions were his own and what ones were Sasuke’s as their flushed naked skin touched together, their little bodies pressed together dangerously close. The only sounds floating on the quiet night air were the soft gasps and sighs that slipped out of the mouths of the two boys as they wildly groped and smooched atop the fluffy bed in Naruto’s perpetually messy room. Even the crickets outside that normally chirped away carelessly were unusually hushed tonight, their music replaced by the symphony of wet, slurping kisses and quiet moans of pleasure.

This strange show of affection was nothing more than a routine gesture, not anything special or unique but somehow simultaneously both absolutely insane and absolutely typical for them by now. It happened regularly every two or three days since they had returned from the Land of Waves; Sasuke would show up unannounced at Naruto’s doorstep late at night after the town had become quiet and still and the two of them would participate in a wordless, yet somehow still passionate, make out session for a brief time. During the daytime they were much the same as ever: bickering rivals who still had loads of trouble working together and getting along, despite their important shared emotional experiences on that last mission. Once night had fallen, however, Sasuke and Naruto were like two completely different people, their relationship turned completely on its head; the moonlit darkness brought out their hidden emotions, uncovered their mutual deep-seated desires for human contact and closeness, that secret admiration and concern for each other that had been growing quietly but steadily ever since they had been teamed up, the same feeling that both boys loathed about themselves, but just couldn’t completely rid themselves of.

Naruto never had to ask Sasuke to come over to his house to participate in this odd ritual of comfort between feuding comrades, and Sasuke never asked if he could visit either, simply showing up in the dead of night whenever he felt like it. The boys never planned out these secret trysts beforehand, neither of them made a conscious decision to go see the teammate that irritated them so much for such an out of this world reason, but simply _knew_ inside when they wanted to see each other, the pair felt a kind of invisible pull to each other and could plainly see the fire of need burning away in each other's eyes; no words needed to be spoken between them, only a casual glance during the day was all Sasuke or Naruto needed to express how they were feeling to each other so they could meet up later that night. Feelings of loneliness, hurt, lust, craving, depression, the pair could easily convey these emotions between themselves with only one silent look into each other’s eyes, the rest of their team completely unaware what the boys were quietly communicating to each other regardless of the situation.

Naruto and Sasuke were two testosterone-fueled guys going through the trials of puberty together, relieving their pent up sexual and emotional stress by spending some time together fooling around and recklessly pushing the boundaries of what was acceptable for their unusual relationship. This youthful and naive experimentation with their growing bodies was being used for nothing other than to quench their thirst for some physical and emotional closeness to another person, something which both of the isolated young men sorely lacked in life. There weren't any feelings of love or romance or any such thing in the action, they each convinced themselves that it had no real meaning beyond being simply a service they provided for each other; feeling each other up with exploring hands, madly slopping wet kisses on each other, to Naruto and Sasuke this was merely a kind of favor or assistance given to a fellow teammate, not all that different from what a waiter or a baker or a taxi driver or anyone else employed in the service industry did for their customers. It was only about satisfaction, not about ensnaring and troubling feelings, that belief resolutely maintaining the delicate distance between them with rationalization and calm detachment from the reality of the situation, any excuse to prevent them from overthinking this utterly irrational act that the two genin both hated and yet enjoyed at the same time. ...The act that was so great with fulfilling their unbridled sexual curiosity and youthful horniness, but which also satisfied their mutual wishing for the warmth and comfort of someone next to them, the feeling–or at least the _illusion_ of the feeling–of being wanted and cared for as tender lips pressed together and flushed skin touched in a mist of misguided desire.

All of this craziness between them had happened because of that one impulsive worried kiss Naruto had given Sasuke as he lay recovering after his fight with Haku. That pointlessly stupid kiss had unlocked this strange new unexplored path for them to take together, not as friends or as lovers or even as rivals anymore, but merely as themselves, simply as Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha, two lonely young guys in want of some comfort wherever they could obtain it in the world, seeking out wherever they could find a shred of happiness. Who would of thought all of this could come from that one poorly thought out act.

This odd turn of events hadn’t happened all at once of course; soon after their mission to the Land of the Waves, Sasuke had begrudgingly visited Naruto's place out of pity to have some ramen together with him when the blond seemed to be having a particularly bad and lonely day, and after that occasion the two boys gradually began spending more time together in secret away from the prying eyes of Kakashi and Sakura. At first it was only few minutes here and there, usually spent eating ramen together, chatting and arguing about dumb pointless stuff, mocking each other as was normal for them, and then occasionally pressing their lips together in wary but enjoyable tension. But after a while, as Sasuke and Naruto began to grow more comfortable with each other the pair started spending longer and longer together on each occasion, boldly advancing a little bit further in their dirty competitive game as the boys got more courageous, more accustomed to this strange and unexpected evolution of their unexplainable bond, more aware of the others presence there. With time both Naruto and Sasuke grew more confident in their motions, keeping lips locked together just a little while longer, bodies nudging closer each occasion, hands squeezing a little tighter with each unscheduled meetup. Even this too was just another form of competition to them, a battle to see who could go the farthest and do the most outrageously intimate thing without chickening out or backing down from the challenge.

Naruto and Sasuke’s silent mutual agreement to continue whatever it was that they now had together had become something of a new link tying them together, an extension of their contentious relationship that had grown and changed in weird ways ever since their first accidental kiss… and maybe even before then, if truth be told. It was a connection that was tenuous and fragile and shamefully hidden from the eyes of their comrades, but somehow it still felt grounded, it still felt real and important to them.

They never spoke of their late night rendezvous or acknowledged what occurred then during the daylight hours, perhaps afraid of admitting that this was probably something they shouldn’t be doing or of further complicating their already messy and ill-defined partnership. Naruto still didn’t know what exactly to call this arrangement, but he didn’t really care in any case. His private time with Sasuke, even though it was usually nothing more than the two of them sitting on his bed and making out for an hour or so every few nights, had become strangely significant to him. It was nice just to be close to someone, to experience the sensation of hands gripping his shoulders and thighs and rear, to feel the body heat of someone else radiating from skin rubbing against his own, even if it was the heat of someone who he still didn’t get along very well with. Being here with Sasuke, playing this game of competitive exploration and perverse curiosity, it was certainly better than being all alone.

Naruto reached out and placed his palms on both Sasuke's cheeks, roughly drawing the raven deeper into yet another kiss, keeping himself continuously connected to Sasuke for what seemed like ages as they both grunted and slurped. Naruto wanted more. He _needed_ more, lusted after an even more intense feeling. Naruto drew back from the kiss for a brief second, letting the horny teens take a momentary break from the long lip lock to catch their breaths and pant in heated excitement, then he aggressively lunged forward to kiss Sasuke again and again and again, quickly repeating the process in succession as he lightly but dominatingly pecked at Sasuke over and over, becoming more erratic and passionate every time he pushed forward to meet Sasuke’s lips as the feelings of lust consumed his brain. The blond began to gently lick at Sasuke's lips with every nipping kiss he planted on them, coaxing the puffy pink orifice to open up for him and grant him entrance. The proud black haired boy valiantly resisted the aggressive attempts momentarily, not willing to let Naruto have his way so easily, but Sasuke was too overtaken by the heat of the moment to put up much of a real fight and with time he soon gave in to the probe as the idiot lapped pleadingly at his lips, at last allowing Naruto’s wet wiggling tongue to slip into his mouth. The energetic appendage promptly began adventurously exploring his mouth, this unknown place that it had never been before, running along his upper teeth, poking and twisting curiously about the damp cavern as Naruto enjoyed his victory and the boy's tongues got to know each other better. Sasuke wasn’t about to give in completely to this loser, though, let him dominate the action of their first tongue kiss. Sasuke let his tongue do it's own acrobatics to counter Naruto's moments, the flexible pink appendage curling and twisting lewdly around Naruto’s, the two nerve packed appendages vigorously caressing and pressing together as Sasuke reversed the front lines of their make out war and forced Naruto’s invading tongue out of his mouth and back to its native habitat. Now it was Sasuke’s turn to explore Naruto’s mouth and be in command, licking along the inside of the blond's cheek and prodding at his tongue just as enthusiastically as Naruto had been. The boy's tongues wriggled and battled for supremacy, waging unending conflict to please one another, going back and forth in each other’s mouths as they both struggled to be the one in charge of the show, much like how Naruto and Sasuke acted on missions, each seeking the superior position, desiring to be the one driving the action and completely unwilling to give in to the other, a competition of wills between two spirited and stubborn guys.

Seeking to decisively regain the balance of power, Sasuke snaked his long arms behind Naruto's back and firmly grabbed ahold of his buttocks, smugly squeezing the two pert bubbles in both his hands, causing Naruto to groan salaciously into Sasuke’s mouth in approval and weakening his resolve to continue to put up a good fight against Sasuke’s invading probe. Driven into frenzied action by Sasuke’s groping, Naruto removed his own hands from his partner’s face and let them meander across Sasuke's smooth alabaster skin as the two boys continued to do battle by frenching, Naruto’s busy hands stopping occasionally to grip appreciatively at his bicep or slide gently and suggestively across against his bare navel and thin treasure trail, causing Sasuke to shiver as a delightful tingling sensation went off like fireworks wherever Naruto’s heated hands roamed across his exposed body. The blond’s hands finally stopped their wandering at Sasuke’s chest and Naruto eagerly began poking and softly rubbing against Sasuke’s perky pink nipples with his fingers. The two little nubs quickly rose and stiffened under Naruto’s delicate teasing as he pinched and rolled them in-between his finger tips. Now it was Sasuke’s turn to moan, the unexpected attention paid to his chest all too much for him to bear to keep quiet anymore. He never knew that it could feel so good to be touched there of all places. The surprisingly intense feeling of his sensitive pecs being toyed with, prodded and massaged and flicked between Naruto’s fingertips, was just a too strangely blissful sensation for Sasuke to contain his groan of enjoyment.

This was unmistakably the most heated of all their sessions together, far and above anything that had preceded it. Something about tonight was different, more intense than it ever had been. The pair had never been this intimate before, this openly exposed both physically and emotionally with each other. In his pants Naruto’s dick throbbed and ached with pure excitement at these arousing events, his member eagerly demanding immediate attention. Naruto silently promised that once they had finished up their make out session and Sasuke had left, he would give ‘Little Naruto’ all the attention he desired. Right now, though, Naruto was too busy to care all that much about his rock-hard boner; at the moment he was more concerned with being with Sasuke and making him feel good as well, for the moment Naruto cared more about experiencing this satisfaction _together_ than he did about his own needy erection.

Sasuke, again seizing the initiative to outdo Naruto's confident movements, temporarily removed his hands from Naruto’s butt, only for them to suddenly return to their former position moments later, but instead of resting outside his pants, this time the lecherous digits were worming their way past Naruto’s waistline into his underwear to touch him bare without the obnoxious border of fabric separating them. Sasuke gripped tightly at Naruto’s ass again once he had invaded the trousers, continuing on with the task of kneading the mounds of flesh in his hands as their tongues continued to duel back in forth in each other’s mouths. Sasuke continued grasping and molding Naruto’s rear almost unconsciously, as if he was transfixed by his work, enthralled by the way the pert buttocks felt tightly gripped in his palms.

The startling sensation of Sasuke's warm hands touching his bare bottom directly sent a sudden jolt of wonderful pleasure through Naruto; the previously unknown touch to that sensitive part of his body felt so weird, but so amazing at the same time, those strong hands fondling his backside with such determination and abandon. If Sasuke kept this kind of meticulous treatment up Naruto might not have to jerk off later after all; with this kind of incredible attention, this kind of ecstasy flowing in his veins as they messily made out, Naruto would definitely come in his pants after too much longer, he wouldn’t be able to hold back or deny how great those hands felt tightly cupped around his butt, how much that sensation was driving him wild.

The intense spasm of sudden and pure pleasure caused by Sasuke’s groping went shooting across Naruto’s whole body like an electrical current and caused his busy digits vigorously playing with Sasuke’s pecs to involuntarily tighten around those protruding nipples, twisting and pulling the sensitive little nubs roughly between the tips of his forefinger and thumb. At the same time, Naruto couldn’t stop himself from suddenly biting down on Sasuke’s lower lip to stifle the noises of enjoyment he was emitting as to not give Sasuke the satisfaction of knowing he had caused Naruto to moan so deliriously and pathetically, the boy reluctantly trying to hold back his growing desire to give in to the wishes of his churning privates and just let himself cream his pants from the amount of pleasure he was experiencing right now. Naruto was groaning so loud in wonderful bliss as Sasuke massaged his rump that Naruto was sure his neighbors would hear the cry of pleasure he accidentally emitted as he involuntarily chomped down on Sasuke’s lip, trying to forcibly quiet his cries and halt his ever looming orgasm. Sasuke’s bottom lip was clamped viciously in-between Naruto’s teeth as he tried to regain control himself, groaning in inflamed lust through his clenched teeth.

Sasuke winced in pain at the unexpectedly violent treatment he was shown and quickly withdrew his hands from out of Naruto’s pants, causing the blond boy to release his vice grip on Sasuke's bottom lip in realization and disappointment, after which Sasuke gave the loser a forceful shove to the chest off his mouth and away from him. “Ow! Too rough, moron!” Sasuke shouted angrily, swatting the blond’s hands away from his nude chest like they were pesky flies gnawing at his skin. He glared at Naruto furiously, panting heavily after breaking their extraordinarily long kiss as he wiped a large gob of saliva off his lower lip with the back of his hand–whether it was his own spit or Naruto’s was anyone's guess. The inside of Sasuke’s bottom lip was bleeding, a trickle of warm iron-tasting blood flowing out into his mouth from the nasty bite wound Naruto had made, and his nipples stuck out painfully as well, fiery red and sore from the sudden, overly violent abuse they had endured.

“S-sorry, I didn’t mean to-” Naruto, who was also panting tiredly from their steamy session, hastily tried to explain his unintended actions.

“I’m going home,” Sasuke brusquely interrupted him with a fierce, threatening anger underlying his words, not at all wanting to hear Naruto’s feeble apology. He seized his shirt–which he had discarded earlier in the night as their chaste pecks had begun to turn into a make out grope-fest and the situation had made Sasuke too hot and bothered to deal with the clothing–which was laying underneath Naruto’s behind and yanked the clothing harshly out from under him, sending the confused blond tumbling over onto his side.

“No wait, Sasuke! Come back!” Naruto called out after scrambling to his feet, attempting to persuade his partner to stay, but unsure exactly what he should say at a time like this. The irritated raven haired boy ignored Naruto's plea, though, bolting for the front door with his shirt gripped tightly in his hand, too clouded with anger to even bother with putting it back on at the moment, Sasuke instead focused entirely on escaping this situation as quickly as possible. He threw open the door and in one quick motion slammed it shut behind him, the loud boom rattling the paper-thin walls of Naruto’s apartment in an overt display of his frustrations.

Naruto watched powerlessly as Sasuke dramatically made his exit, collapsing face-forward onto his bed only moments after Sasuke had left the room, instantly feeling unsatisfied and depressed with the unfortunate turn of events. _Arghhh! This! Keeps! Happening! Things start getting that way and he always runs away,_ the confounded boy complained to himself as he sighed into his pillow with glum disappointment. Throughout the weeks of make out sessions that they had participated in since their return from the Land of Waves, Sasuke and Naruto had never gotten as far or as remarkably intimate as they had tonight, but every time it seemed things were getting heated and beginning to go in that direction Sasuke would always suddenly withdraw all at once, get angry for some reason or another, and then beat a hasty retreat back to his own home without giving any kind of real explanation. Naruto had lost track of how many times it had happened in a row now without fail, six, maybe seven? The consistent pattern of interruptions was starting to seriously get on Naruto’s nerves. If Sasuke had some sort of issue with what they were doing then he should just come out and say it up front! And if he didn't want to do it anymore then that was fine, but why be such a complicated ass about it all?! Did he have some reason he didn’t want to keep kissing or something? Was he afraid to go any farther than this? It was a pretty nerve racking thing to be sure, the fact that they of all people were actually doing something like this together, but without any clues Naruto had no idea what was really going on with Sasuke. Just like always, despite everything that had happened between them he was still so distant and unreachable. Why was that jerk being so damn evasive?! _Ugh, Sasuke, why can’t you just tell me what’s going on? I can’t read your mind, you bastard!_

Naruto lay listlessly in his bed with his face buried into his pillow, thinking about what he could do to fix the situation. But he didn’t really know what was eating Sasuke these days, so Naruto didn’t have any bright ideas on how to resolve the issue. This awkwardness, this uncertainty and lack of communication between them couldn't remain much longer in their secret relationship without it inevitably spilling over into their professional one. It would only be a matter of time before this tension between them exploded like a ticking time bomb and their relationship outside of this room got even worse than it already was. This was the only place that they got along, and if even this sanctuary was destroyed then things would become bleak for them indeed. Whether they had a serious discussion about what was going on, or continued even further into realms unknown, or halted this insanity altogether, _something_ had to be done before they both were negatively effected by the consequences of such pent up frustration and bitterness. Naruto just wasn't sure _what_ exactly he should do without knowing the inner workings of Sasuke's mind, what solution would work to uncomplicate this festering problem before it became too much to handle anymore.

_...Maybe I’m just not doing it right,_ Naruto reluctantly admitted to himself. It didn't exactly make him feel proud to accept such a thing, but it _was_ a possibility. _I mean, I’ve never done this kind of thing before after all. Maybe Sasuke keeps getting angry because I’m doing it wrong?_ It was certainly true that Naruto lacked experience; the only hands-on practice with pervy stuff he had was from these late night bouts, and even if he occasionally looked at some dirty magazines that wasn’t really much help when it came to actually doing that sort of junk in real life. Besides, no matter how often he looked at naked _ladies_ that wouldn't really help him out with what Sasuke felt and enjoyed, no matter how much Sasuke may have resembled Naruto's very favorite model in his porno mag. In fact, the only person Naruto had ever even so much as kissed in his life was Sasuke himself, let alone anything beyond that. Sasuke was _obnoxiously_ popular with the ladies and they practically threw themselves at the cocky pretty boy, so it was possible that he was more ‘familiar’ with this sort of thing than Naruto was. If Sasuke really did have more experience then maybe he was just annoyed with Naruto’s fumbling ignorance and inability. Was that it then? It seemed to fit with the situation and could explain Sasuke's reactions lately, but the more he thought about it the more blanks came up in Naruto’s mind; Sasuke certainly didn’t seem like the type to be going around in secret making out with tons of girls... But then again, Naruto realized that thought could just as easily be applied to the predicament the two boys currently found themselves in as well, so he wasn’t really sure just _what_ to think anymore. What explained Sasuke's anger and frustration? What was causing him to simultaneously draw Naruto closer with one arm and push him away with the other? This was so damn frustrating! No one knew how to piss him off better than Sasuke; even when they screwed around and things were more different than ever before, Sasuke was still as distant, cocky, and so irritatingly hostile as ever.

Naruto seriously could use some help here figuring this all out, but he didn’t really have anyone to ask about this kind of thing; he had no parents or siblings or friends he could ask for information or advice pertaining to personal topics like this. He knew he could potentially ask Iruka-sensei about this matter, but Naruto quickly discarded that idea after a moment of thinking it through; asking that pesky sensei about something weird like this would have been just _way_ too embarrassing to handle and Iruka would likely have a massive fit about it anyways, sticking his well-meaning but still annoying nose in where it didn't belong.

When it came to matters of relationships and communication and interaction Naruto had pretty much always had to learn it all himself through guesswork and trial and error since he had very few interpersonal connections in life that he could learn from, so because of that lack of experience he wasn’t all that much of an expert in dealing with other people’s thoughts or emotions. Naruto had always just tried to apply other people’s feelings to himself, think about how stuff made them feel and how it would feel if it happened to him. _What's that called again?… Empty? No, it's uhhh…Empathy, yeah!_ Naruto quickly corrected his mistaken vocabulary, glad that a certain jerk face wasn't here to mock him for his lack of finesse with language. As someone who had it rough growing up Naruto _empathized_ with other people’s tough situations, knew perfectly how to get along and interact with other dejected and downtrodden people just like himself, the losers and weirdos and outcasts, the isolated people at the bottom of the social spectrum. That was probably why he got along so well with that cute little energetic brat Konohamaru; the kid’s frustration with being overlooked, his resentment for no one seeing him as an individual and more than just the Hokage’s grandson, no one seeing him for himself, it was a feeling that deeply resonated with Naruto, so it was easy for him to understand that sentiment and easy for Naruto to get what Konohamaru was thinking and feeling. Their bond of friendship and gentle rivalry entirely unlike that which he had with Sasuke was probably so strong because they both had that feeling of understanding between each other.

But Sasuke on the other hand? He was just so… Naruto didn’t get him at all. Their relationship was still so muddy and murky even after all they had been through, still not easily defined as either hatred or admiration, friendship or rivalry. Naruto didn't know what to call Sasuke anymore, what category to put him in. And that was a big deal; Naruto needed to understand things like that, needed Sasuke's feelings and his own to be clarified somehow. Oddly enough, for whatever reasons that created those roadblocks between them, they didn't connect the way he and Konohamaru did, ignoring their physical relationship of course. The bond between them was like air, certainly there and real, but you couldn't see it or feel it or tell what it was composed of. It was mysterious and unknowable. There were some parts to Sasuke that Naruto believed he knew very well, such as how his similar state of isolation and exclusion must have made him feel, but there were so many other sides of the guy Naruto still didn't understand at all. He was usually so soft spoken and distant unless he was attacking Naruto with insults, making it very difficult for Naruto to understand much about him. Sasuke always felt like he was in an entirely different place looking at completely different things than Naruto was. Naruto had thought that this profane experimenting between them had brought them a little bit closer to understanding one another, but maybe that was all just in his head and all this really _did_ have no meaning or purpose. As hard as it was cooperating with the jerk on a day to day basis, it was even tougher to get to know him. Naruto had been classmates with Sasuke for years and teammates for a good while now, and he realized he still knew next to nothing about Sasuke. ...But he _wanted_ to. Naruto really wanted to get to know Sasuke better, to understand what was going on between them. He just didn’t know _how_ …

Naruto really wanted to do _something_. Odd as it sounded, this thing had become special for Naruto and Sasuke, this totally wrong, completely weird secret arrangement between them had become something normal, a quiet moment where all they cared about was their own happiness and content without judgement or fear. It felt great to Naruto, experiencing things he had never felt before, being enveloped by physical gratification, so much so that he didn’t even mind all that much that it was with his mouthy rival Sasuke. So if they were going to keep up this bizarre thing they had going on, to continue this ritual of weird intimacy between spiteful foes, then Naruto wanted to know if he was doing something wrong. He needed to know what was bugging Sasuke so he could do something about it. If he really was the only one feeling good in the end and Sasuke wasn’t getting the same enjoyment out this arrangement that Naruto was, well that was an imbalance in their relationship that he couldn’t let stand. Sasuke needed to feel that kind of thing too; that’s what this whole thing was about anyways, _both_ of them feeling good. Naruto had to do something to fix that broken situation; being equal, being on the same level as Sasuke was something he had sought for many years, ever since their younger days back at the Academy. He refused to let even this weird thing they had now to get in the way of that, wouldn't allow whatever was bothering Sasuke to further slant their bond in his favor. Even in this act of physical connection, Sasuke was still his rival and Naruto still relished that sort of connection.

Suddenly, a light bulb formed over Naruto’s head and a great idea popped into his mind. He knew of a perfect place to get some info about this sort of thing, someplace that must be a treasure trove of issue solving relationship advice. There was someone in his life who _loved_ books that were full of dirty tidbits that might help Naruto out in his time of need. _I know! Kakashi-sensei is always reading those pervy books of his. If I could ge't my hands on one, maybe I could find out some tips and learn how to do it better!_ “He he he he,” the blond giggled happily as he impatiently formulated a plan to acquire one of those books using the masterful creative skills he had gained as a young prankster, hoping that a better physical connection would give him better insight when it came to Sasuke's feelings.

***

Naruto snickered quietly to himself in delight as he proceeded to sneak into Kakashi’s almost barren apartment the morning after designing his master plan to capture the important documents hidden away there. _Man, I’m so smart_ , Naruto proudly proclaimed of himself. _If you want to learn about pervy things, go find a perv._ It was such a simple plan, breaking in to leaf through Kakashi’s stash of smutty materials, but he was proud of himself for thinking it up nonetheless. After pushing open the door, Naruto stealthily peeked his head into the apartment from the open doorway to find no one home. It was certainly strange that Kakashi kept his front door unlocked; Naruto had been shocked to find the door smoothly open without any hassle after twisting the handle. Breaking in had been even easier than he had planned. What kind of jounin did that, though? Just how absent-minded was Kakashi-sensei really?

_Alright! Infiltration successful!_ Naruto congratulated himself again on a job well done after cautiously taking his first steps into the apartment, not that breaking and entering into his sensei’s home had been all that difficult a task to accomplish. Taking a quick but quiet look around the place to make sure he really was alone and Kakashi wasn't hiding in wait anywhere, Naruto found that after inspecting the place the only things of much note in Kakashi's bedroom were two framed pictures placed prominently on a small shelf above the bed as if they were very important mementos to Kakashi–one of them was the picture Team 7 had taken together and the other was an older but strikingly similar photo of what seemed to be a young Kakashi and some other people Naruto didn’t recognize–and a bookshelf crammed full of novels with suggestive sounding titles. Other than that, the room was unexpectedly dull for a great and powerful ninja like Kakashi. It was kind of a let down; Naruto didn’t know what to expect exactly before coming here, but it certainly wasn’t this.

Naruto crouched down in front of the stack of books and peered at the array of available tomes sitting on the shelves, glancing at this one and that one while trying to figure out which of these he needed, which one would provide him with the best possible information. Surely there had to be something here he could use. But only now in this late stage did the genin realize the major flaw with his plan; Naruto had no idea just _which_ particular book would actually help him learn anything of value. The sheer amount of them was staggering, the collection a true testament to just how perverted Kakashi really was on the inside, two, three, four shelves all crammed with various erotica, Naruto swimming in a sea of perverseness that he knew little about. Unable to pick between any of the dirty novels even after studiously reading through their titles–some of the dirty double entendres which Naruto didn’t even fully comprehend the meanings of–Naruto then closed his eyes and decided to select one completely at random, pulling it off the shelf and letting luck determine his path.

“What are you doing with my first edition of Make Out Paradise?” an ominous voice questioned from behind Naruto before the boy could even open the book and begin to examine its risque contents. The unexpected voice suddenly calling out to him scared the living daylights out of Naruto and caused him to jump up so quickly that the dirty book nearly went flying out of his hands into the air. Whirling around in startled bewilderment to confront the foe that had gotten the drop on him, Naruto found his sensei Kakashi Hatake–the owner of the book gripped tightly in his hand–standing there right behind him looking down disapprovingly at him. At least, Naruto _thought_ it was a look of disapproval; it was difficult to really tell any of Kakashi’s emotions at a glance based solely on the single eye and partial cheek that weren't covered up by his mask and forehead guard, making the man a master of emotional deception.

“O-oh! Is _that_ what this is? I… I thought this was a ninja manual! I was looking to learn some new jutsu and I figured you were hiding some awesome secret techniques I could learn to surprise you with, sensei!” Naruto laughed nervously, trying his best to adequately lie to his teacher. This was definitely a bad position to be caught in. The best course of action surely was to play stupid and come up with something believable.

“You’re too young for this kind of book, Naruto,” Kakashi chastised him, shaking his head disappointedly and removing the tome from Naruto’s weakening grasp, not buying his student's excuse even for a second. Curiosity of that kind may have been normal for boys his age, but Kakashi _did_ have sort of a duty as Naruto’s sensei to prevent him from experiencing things before he was ready for them, whether it was _trying_ to teach him patience and to pace himself on missions, or keeping him from being being exposed to adult materials like this.

“I’m telling you that’s not it!” Naruto shouted back at his sensei defensively, his cheeks flushing rosy pink in embarrassment at being caught in such a shameful position. The boy’s rebuke was overly aggressive and quick, letting Kakashi know he had struck a bullseye on the first shot.

“Hmmm… If you say so,” Kakashi replied, sounding completely unconvinced as he narrowed his eyes–or eye rather–in suspicion. There were unmissable content advisories on the book and Naruto had definitely seen Kakashi read this particular novel in the past, even chastised the jounin about reading it out in public once before not too long ago, so Kakashi knew there was no way that Naruto didn’t know beforehand what he was picking up. The real question was _why_? This didn’t really seem like one of the pranks Naruto usually pulled, so what was his real purpose for being here?

For a while there was tense silence in the room as Naruto stood looking down at his feet in embarrassment and shame and Kakashi scrutinized the boy under his watchful gaze, patiently letting his student be the first one to explain rather than try to squeeze the info out of him.

A thought had begun to bother Naruto of late and he was desperate to get his hands on any source of information he could that would help resolve the issue. That was the whole point of him being here in the first place, not that this effort had gone according to plan at all. Sasuke was his rival, that was still undoubtedly true, but following the other day when Sasuke had come over to his house to have some ramen together and they had ended up kissing once again, something felt… different. Nothing felt the same after that point. He wasn’t sure how to explain it clearly, only that something between them or maybe even inside of himself felt _changed_ by recent events, but whether it was in a good way or a bad one Naruto had no idea. That feeling was very imposing, and it clustered together into another new profound thought; he realized he wanted to know more about Sasuke. Even though they were teammates, Naruto still knew very little about Sasuke. What he liked, what he hated–other than Naruto himself of course–what made him happy, what made him angry, any of that. And that fact... bothered Naruto. It irritated him like a nasty bug bite that he couldn't satiate no matter how much he scratched at it. Part of Naruto believed that the two of them just naturally understood one another without the need for such words, but the other half of himself wasn’t so sure since they honestly barely even knew each other. But Naruto had no idea how to reach out, especially towards someone like Sasuke, and was way too proud to ask any personal things like that upfront, leaving him in a bind. The only way they ever connected was in his bedroom in the physical sense, there was no happiness or sense of understanding. The only way they got along was by touching, a shallow basis for any kind of relationship.That was why he had come here, to find out what their bond meant, to understand if all they really had was the physical or if there was something even more confusing and frustrating going on here. Before he could answer those questions Naruto needed to protect what they had now, work to maintain the status quo before things completely fell apart. There had to be some way to learn stuff like that, both the emotional and the more... physical side of those matters tied together in one place; smutty romance novels had to be the key. Naruto was ashamed of those thoughts, but equally unwilling to let the fragile situation between him and that jackass Sasuke stand as it was, everything collapsing around their ears as they struggled to make sense of it all. What else was there for him to do?

“...Hey, Kakashi-sensei?” Naruto muttered after a long period of quiet reflecting to himself, looking up at his teacher from his shoes with an inquisitive, almost yearning look in his eyes.

“Yes, Naruto?” the white haired man questioned back, a little off-put at how Naruto seemed at the moment, how unusually fragile and uncertain he was.

“What should you do if you like someone, but you don’t know if that person likes you back?” The question flowed out of Naruto’s mouth so meekly and softy that Kakashi was momentarily taken aback by the atypical character of Naruto’s words.

_I see now, so that’s it…_ Kakashi pondered as he looked down at his student in a complicated mixture of stern objection and pitying understanding, unsure whether he should lecture Naruto for making an unwelcome intrusion into his home or hear the boy out in his moment of plight. Naruto was around that age now after all, that tumultuous time in a boy’s life when desire overtook reason and the thing in your trousers started overruling your brain in most matters. It was no wonder he was curious about what tantalizing secrets these books held then. Naruto certainly wasn’t the type to do things for no reason, so something must have triggered this need for information, something unexpected had led up to his intrusion here, but Kakashi honestly hadn’t expected this kind of behavior from him just yet. It hadn’t been all that long ago that the man had first been assigned as Team 7's sensei and yet his students were all growing up so fast before his eyes. Before too long those brats wouldn't even need him anymore and would become chunin. He had pride and confidence in their skill, but still it was fairly sad in a way watching those three grow, so Kakashi decided to get everything he could out of being their leader and teach them whatever he could, even if it was something beyond the realms of ninja knowledge such as this this. “Hm? Is there someone that you like, Naruto?” Kakashi asked his pupil, feigning ignorance to the true reasons Naruto had snuck into his apartment and trying to help the best he could.

“No!” the boy shouted out quickly in response, as if afraid of judgment from Kakashi for his odd question, like his sensei would make fun of him for asking such a thing like a certain someone else always did. “I mean no, um, I’m just asking for... someone I know,” Naruto tried to come up with a convincing lie and pretend he hadn't initially reacted with such force, something that was particularly hard to do while standing under Kakashi’s withering gaze.

“Is is Sasuke?” Kakashi asked without missing a beat.

“What?! How could I possibly like that bastard?!” Naruto exploded with irritated anger all at once, his earlier uncharacteristic meekness blown away in an instant by Kakashi's absolutely absurd question. How could Kakashi suggest something so crazy and disgusting?! Of course he didn’t actually _like_ Sasuke, Naruto just couldn’t figure out why he was being so overly-bitter and unusual recently. He only wanted to figure out something to fix that situation, that was all! His motives were undeniably pure, and yet Kakashi was making it sound so totally wrong! That was why Naruto had come here, just for assistance, but now he was caught by Kakashi in an embarrassing situation and being humiliated by his interrogation. What a mess this had turned out to be! “Sasuke’s a jerk and he’s selfish and he’s so damn cocky that it makes me want to punch him so hard sometimes! And he also-”

“Calm down,” Kakashi gently chastised Naruto to be quieter in other people's houses by putting his hands on the boy's shoulders. Forcefully interrupting his passionate tirade against Sasuke in its infancy was important lest the man want to be here all day listening to the myriad of ways the two boys fought and disagreed, Naruto checking off the items on the likely lengthy list of complaints about Sasuke he carried around in his head one by one. “I meant are you _asking_ for Sasuke,” he clarified his words for the boy.

“Uhh, no… just someone I know,” Naruto replied with a shrug, refusing to divulge his hidden information. _I don’t think he has anyone he likes anyways. He never pays any special attention to Sakura. Or any of the other girls for that matter, even though they drool over him and make gaga eyes whenever they see him. He’s so lucky! I wish Sakura would pay attention to me like that. She only thinks about Sasuke and all he ever thinks about is getting stronger. Meh, I feel so left out sometimes…_ Naruto thought sullenly. That jerk had all the luck with girls and yet he didn’t seem to care one bit. He was such an ass.

“Well then, normally you–I mean this person that you know–would just go ask the person they liked how they felt directly.”

“That's not really an option... Is what he tells me anyway!” Naruto added quickly after a moment, still hoping to hide his by now obvious intentions. “He told me he’s afraid to tell the person he likes since he might get a bad answer. He want’s to get closer, but he said he doesn’t know how to do it. All he really wants is just for that person to notice him...” Naruto drifted off absentmindedly without realizing he had accidentally divulged more than he had intended to. “But how do you get someone to really notice you in the first place?!” he loudly asked, showing just how much trouble he was having with this issue, seemingly getting closer to the true matter at hand and stripping away the unnecessary baggage and falsehoods attached to it.

“I think the best thing to do is to just be yourself, Naruto. If it’s you, I know you’ll have no problems in gaining attention,” Kakashi chuckled, trying to reassure his student. Naruto had the effect of drawing people's attention with his over the top attitude and bright personality, for better or for worse it was just who he was. With every sentence the boy uttered Kakashi was starting to see more and more of what Naruto really intended to say but was too proud or cautious to really ask. And there was one person in particular that seemed to fit this train of thought better than any other... “But seriously," the jounin moved on, becoming more serious as he realized Naruto failed to react to his joke, "it isn’t really that hard of a thing to do. Whether it's you or your friend that's having issues, if you’re upfront and honest then people will respect that. Whether it’s a friend or a rival or someone you have a crush on, you have to be open i order to build up trust and respect. You might even be surprised; sometimes the people who don’t seem to be paying attention at all are actually the ones who are noticing you the most.”

_That hasn’t worked at all, I know because I’ve tried,_ Naruto thought with disappointment, his expression plainly displaying his crestfallen hopes of getting some great secret to interaction and communication from his teacher. Naruto always acted as 'himself', yet Sasuke never payed attention, or at least didn't truly take notice of him despite his efforts, the mellow jerk always seemed to be looking elsewhere, his attention far off into the distance as if he could see something there everyone else could not. Even now, it was like Sasuke didn’t really see Naruto for Naruto, like the guy looked right through him as if he were invisible. Deep inside of himself Naruto had this obnoxious little voice that he couldn’t entirely silence that kept chanting, ‘Look at me! Pay attention to me!’ when it came to Sasuke. It had been there for _years_ now, constant chattering away trying to find new ways for Sasuke to at last take real notice of him, for them to finally reach some sort of real connection and rivalry beyond just bitterness and hate.

Seeing the unconvinced look on Naruto's face, Kakashi quickly amended his statements, hoping to still support his young ward. “If that doesn't work, I suppose your friend could always watch how the person he likes acts around him.”

“How they act?” Naruto questioned, raising his eyebrow at the simplistic sounding suggestion.

“Yeah, most people act differently around someone they like. They try to be nicer, or act more cheerfully, or even try to push themselves to be stronger than they normally are. Most people only want to show their best side to those they like,” Kakashi said matter-of-factly. "It's sort of like how your friend wants to be noticed. Maybe that person they have their eyes on has a similar sort of feeling, but they're just trying to keep it hidden. I think the best thing to do would be to slowly build things up rather than go all out. You never really know what some people are keeping hidden Naruto," he stated with a sympathetic smile, patting the boy's head in an attempt to make him feel better.

“...Huh? That’s it?!” Naruto yelled in surprise after a moment has passed, realizing Kakashi had no more words of wisdom to say. This info was of no use to him at all! Perhaps asking Kakashi had been the wrong plan after all, maybe he should have just walked away when he had been discovered with the stolen book in his hands instead. Watch how Sasuke acted? He acted like a big stuck up jerk. Big whoop. What help would knowing that be in getting to understand what was bothering Sasuke?

“Well, there’s more to it than that, but…” Kakashi trailed off, reluctant to do anymore than he already had in case it ended up persuading Naruto do something he shouldn't. He was walking a tightrope here, trying hard to help the kid but not make his decisions for him. Kakashi wasn't interested in pushing his students into anything, _especially_ when it came to matters like this, important maters of interaction and emotion, they had to learn for themselves or they would never grow. _It’s hard to explain this to a kid. Especially one like Naruto,_ Kakashi sighed haplessly at being put in such an awkward position, purposely avoiding altogether the vital subject of physical closeness in a relationship. Sex ed certainly wasn't a topic of study as a genin and Kakashi didn't want to teach Naruto anything about bonding beyond the kind between teammates. Even if he was going through puberty and filled with all sorts of strange new feelings, Naruto was still only 12 years old after all. In any case, if Kakashi started explaining sex and dating in detail to Naruto he knew that Iruka would find out somehow and would definitely hunt him down and kill him. The scarred teacher was overly protective of his precious former student, whom he still secretly doted on as a little brother figure still needing his help and protection from the big scary world. If worst came to worst Kakashi might even be haunted by the vengeful ghost of the Fourth Hokage if he wasn't careful in how he dealt with Naruto and exposed him to anything inappropriate. “Your friend should try talking more with the person he likes. Find out what they enjoy and discuss it with them. Relationships and love, just like teamwork, are built on mutual understanding and trust, after all. And of course, you have to spend time together with that person. The more time your friend spends with that person and the better he gets to know them the more he will be able to tell if they like him back. If your friend does that I'm sure everything will turn out fine. So, does that help any, Naruto?”

“Yeah, I guess so. Thanks, sensei…” Naruto mumbled unenthusiastically as he turned and left Kakashi’s apartment, slinking despondently out the door. He had come here to try to figure out why Sasuke had been acting so strangely and how to fix it, but it seemed he was out of luck. His efforts to to find a way to catch his rival's attention and understand him better would apparently have to wait for another day and another plot.

_...Hopefully I didn’t just make things worse,_ Kakashi thought to himself as he watched Naruto plod out of his room disappointedly with his head hung low. _Sorry I wasn’t more helpful, but you’re still a bit too young for my real advice, Naruto. You have to learn to walk before you can run. Get a little more experience with love and I’ll be happy to actually help you out better in a couple years. And then once you're 18 I’ll let you borrow my books so you can get to learn the real good stuff._ “Heh heh,” Kakashi chuckled to himself in a distinctly pervy manner, recalling all the dirty little details of the book in his hand, the one he had fortunately taken away from Naruto just in the nick of time.

***

Naruto sighed heavy-heartedly as he slowly walked back home after his failed attempt at breaking into Kakashi’s house in search for precious knowledge. _Find out what they like and talk about it? But Sasuke doesn’t really like anything, so I guess that’s out._ How exactly could he find out anything like that when Sasuke himself refused to divulge that information, guarding his personal tastes like they were state secrets. _Spending time together… Well, we have been spending a lot more time together, but it’s not like we do anything other than kiss. We don’t talk and have fun or anything like that at all. We still fight a ton while out on missions, too. So would that even count?_

Naruto would have liked to get along with Sasuke better, truly he would. It just seemed that whenever they were together they ended up fighting and arguing over something. His mouth had the unfortunate skill of turning everything he wanted to say to Sasuke into an insult or challenge. And Sasuke was just so standoffish and superior that it drove Naruto nuts, further driving a wedge between them and stopping his efforts. Naruto would have liked to actually _talk_ with Sasuke for once, ask him about something, whether it was important and impactful or just stupid chit chat, to have a _real_ conversation with him, but it was so difficult to stand being around Sasuke when he acted so high and mighty all the time. Sasuke was very hard to approach like that, and Naruto’s stubborn pride refused to allow him to show any weakness to his bitter rival. Thus their cold war continued without any signs of progress. Deep down Naruto did want to find a way to become closer to the black haired jerk, but he just didn’t know how to go about it.

It was strange. His feelings were just so strange recently. For a long time Naruto had had a crush on Sakura, his other teammate. She was pretty, intelligent, and had a strong will hidden deep inside, all things Naruto found admirable about her. Sasuke on the other hand was egotistical, aggressive, and combative to the point that it seriously annoyed Naruto. So why then had he become more drawn to Sasuke than to Sakura these days? Naruto still liked her, but ever since they had all been assigned to team up he had found his feelings for Sakura slowly lessening, realized that she made up less and less of his thoughts as the days went by. In her place Sasuke took up an ever growing amount of his thoughts and emotions. Naruto found himself growing more interested in Sasuke, what he did, what he felt, how he acted. He was becoming more conscious of Sasuke’s presence. And more than anything Naruto cared about Sasuke’s opinion of him, endlessly sought to be seen as the equal and worthy rival he had always strived to be. Every time Sasuke had pushed him down and beaten back his efforts it hurt. Why couldn’t he grab Sasuke’s attention, even with all of his hard work?

It was strange. Guys weren't supposed to like other guys. These feelings were so abnormal to Naruto, he had no idea what to do with them or how to express them, or even if he _should_ express them. And even if he _had_ to like another guy, why did it have to be Sasuke? If he had to have been in this weird position Naruto would have preferred his feelings be for Kiba, or Shikamaru, or _anyone else_ but Sasuke. It might have been better to just lock these confusing feelings away and ignore them completely. After all, Naruto wasn’t even really sure if he actually liked Sasuke the same way he liked Sakura. He definitely felt a connection with the boy, a bond growing quietly between them, but there wasn’t really much of a foundation to their relationship, not much of value or importance that connected them to build on. The feeling wasn’t really the same; when he looked at Sakura, Naruto got nervous butterflies in his stomach. When he looked at Sasuke the feeling was more like a swarm of bees, irritated and anxious. So perhaps he had just confused his budding admiration for and fierce rivalry with Sasuke for something else entirely? Naruto found himself respecting and admiring Sasuke more than he ever had before. The way he had saved Naruto from Haku in the Land of Waves… How could Naruto _not_ have at least a partial change of heart after that? The wires must have just gotten mixed up when Naruto found himself actually approving of someone he had to that point hated. These were just feelings he wasn’t used to applying to Sasuke so he was confusing them for something else. When he took their unusual physical relationship into account that made more sense, but Naruto still wasn’t sure if that was it in the end. After a while he began to think that maybe he really did like Sasuke, but he was just too afraid to admit it even to himself. But no, that couldn’t be true! He still partially hated Sasuke, still found him to be the smug jackass he always had been. So just what the hell was going on then?!

This was all just so damn strange! No matter how much Naruto thought about it nothing made sense to him. His feelings felt like a bunch of pieces of rope twisted up together and tied into all sorts of knots, so you couldn’t find where one piece began and the other ended and trying to untie them or pull on them only made the strings tighter and even more jumbled up. He had no idea how to untie that mess in his heart, no idea how to handle Sasuke or deal with his own feelings.

“I’m hungry…” Naruto mumbled absentmindedly. Thinking about complicated things always made him very hungry. The brain needed nourishment to function properly after all. It was probably best just to give up trying to think about it, just let it all be for now and grab a big heaping bowl of delicious ramen.

***

_Why do I keep going back there?_ Sasuke pointedly questioned himself over his own motives. _It’s just a distraction. I know that, yet I keep going back and he keeps letting me come over. We don’t fight like usual, or even talk for that matter, all we do is kiss and grab._ Over the past weeks since he had so uncharacteristically acted to willingly block that near-fatal attack in order to protect Naruto back in the Land of Waves Sasuke had found himself increasingly dependent on his interactions with Naruto, found them becoming more and more a normal part of his routine. And that fact worried him deeply.

Was it out of pity, or was it something else? Both were troublesome in different ways.

Part of him deep down wondered if maybe being around Naruto and Team 7 was actually a good thing for him after all. Sasuke had tried hard to push down his emotions and live solely for revenge ever since the fall of his clan, but even he was only human. Even Sasuke got lonely sometimes. What was the harm then in seeking a little bit of comfort in Naruto? Was it really so wrong to try and find some brief respite from his unhappy, empty life? Was it okay to just take a moment to have some stability and peace in his chaotic life?

He berated this part of himself, absolutely loathed and despised this pathetic weakness and sense of attachment. Connections made people weak, and if he was weak he couldn’t hunt down and kill his brother Itachi. But even as he warned himself of the dangers he found himself mysteriously drawn to the blond boy. Sure, Naruto was annoying as all hell, and he was dense as a brick sometimes, but it wasn't as if Sasuke actually hated him… That much. If he had truly hated him with all his heart Sasuke wouldn’t have risked his life to save Naruto’s. The boy was also courageous and strong willed and passionate and fiercely determined, all things Sasuke found strangely appealing about him. There was just something about him and the ties between them that Sasuke had a hard time controlling and denying.

But they were ties that he shouldn’t have. Strength had to come before friendship, before happiness, before _everything_. Sasuke had long ago buried his heart and all his emotions with it in order to make room for revenge. That was the only thing in him now... At least it was supposed to be. He couldn’t allow himself to feel this way, to get drawn up into something that would consume him and distract him from his goal. His purpose in life was to avenge his family not to form pointless friendships with loudmouthed idiots.

_Don’t get any closer,_ Sasuke reminded himself, warning himself not to get too invested. _Just keep this distance and everything will be fine. Getting emotionally attached is only a distraction._ He knew getting more involved would screw everything up. He knew he had to stop himself, to gain control of his buried feelings that were clawing their way out of their grave. But some part of himself refused to accept these warnings. Some frustrating, elusive piece of Sasuke’s heart wanted to get even closer to Naruto than he already was.

***

“Good morning, Sakura!” Naruto cheerfully called out to his fellow teammate, sprinting towards her with far too much boisterousness for this early in the morning as Sakura impatiently waited for Kakashi to hurry and show up already for their latest mission. The remarkably energetic boy stopped dead in his tracks when he noticed Sasuke standing idly next to her, however, and his bright smile quickly evaporated into thin air, replaced by a look of frustrated annoyance after glancing his rival, as if disgusted that he had to even so much as share the same air as his mortal foe. Sasuke himself replied to this challenge in kind with his own scowl of dislike directed back at Naruto after spotting the blond’s presence there.

Naruto and Sasuke glared at each other awkwardly for a brief moment, a tense state of utter silence falling between the three teammates as Sakura watched this most unusual display from the sidelines, worriedly looking back and forth between the two rivals as they silently dueled with equally unpleasant expressions. _Boy, if looks could kill._ The pair eyed each other cautiously, seemingly uncertain of what to do next, like the two young men were deciding on just how to handle this situation, going through the possible options to resolve this emotionally conflicting confrontation in their heads. Under normal circumstances they would have thrown their customary insults at each other or Sasuke would have berated Naruto for some reason or another, but strangely enough no such incident occurred today. Today was very atypical for them, the current situation ominously sizzling in muted wariness instead of their normal noisy back and forth enmity, and in fact Sakura could have _sworn_ that she saw the faint pink tinge of bewildered embarrassment growing on both of their faces as the two boys suddenly ended their heated staring contest and turned their backs to each other in a huff, both scoffing in disgust at the other’s presence. Sakura grimaced nervously at the ominous sight. Had their relationship really devolved so far that they refused to even _speak_ to each other anymore? Sure, Sasuke and Naruto had never had a great working relationship by any means, but to go _this_ far… Just what happened to all that great teamwork they had shown during the mission to the Land of Waves?

_This again?_ Sakura sighed in her head, exhausted with her partner's foul attitudes already this morn... And it hadn’t even been two whole minutes yet since they all met up. Another day, another draining episode of their increasingly childish feud that she was subjected to whether she liked it or not. _These two have been acting weird around each other ever since we returned from the Land of Waves. Did something happen between them when I wasn’t looking? I can’t believe it, but somehow their relationship actually seems even worse than usual!_ she noted as Sasuke stared off into space in the opposite direction of Naruto, while the blond crossed his arms and began tapping his foot impatiently against the wooden bridge beneath him. Unbelievably, Sasuke and Naruto had actually been even _more_ at each other's throats of late, constantly bickering over even the tiniest things since they had come back to the Leaf Village, the conflict between them growing more vicious and pointless than ever. But after a while, the situation had become even worse and even stranger as Naruto and Sasuke simply started ignoring each other all together, both too busy pretending the other didn’t exist to bother with fighting anymore. And that was certainly a worrying sign of what was to come; annoying each other was a favorite hobby of both boys, allowed them to vent their frustrations in a relatively controlled setting. If they no longer wished to have even that sparse amount of interaction with each other, then Sakura knew Team 7 was in store for some rough weather ahead.

Just how had things devolved so badly between them so quickly? She just couldn’t figure it out; one day they miraculously seemed to be getting along about as well as one could hope for two guys who openly declared they disliked each other, and now they suddenly hated each other like never before, much more venom and bile in their relationship than ever if that was even possible. Sakura was _so_ certain after what had happened on the mission to the Land of Waves that the two of them would start getting along better, even if only a little bit at a time, small gestures of camaraderie and such. Though she hadn’t been there to see him do it, busy protecting the bridge builder Tazuna while her friends fought with Haku, Sakura later learned about how Sasuke had protected Naruto from what could have been a fatal blow in that fight. Sakura could also tell that, for his own part, Naruto had obviously been broken up about Sasuke's ‘death’ when she had seen him after the conclusion of the battle with Haku, she saw that look of guilt and despair on his face once Haku had been dealt with, and even after it turned out Sasuke was okay she recalled how Naruto had hovered so worriedly over Sasuke during his subsequent recovery period, keeping a concerned eye on his rival the whole time. Sakura couldn’t believe her eyes, she was absolutely shocked by these remarkable actions from those two; she had never seen Naruto express any emotions even close to those oddly friendly ones towards Sasuke before, and she had never expected the loner Sasuke to go so far to help the perpetual thorn in his side Naruto, even if they were teammates fighting for their lives. To Sakura it was plain to see Naruto had been worried about Sasuke, that he felt awkwardly indebted to him after being on the receiving end of Sasuke’s bold heroics. And on the other hand, even if he would never admit it Sasuke had himself been worried about Naruto as well, enough to physically shield him from danger even knowing what it could have cost him. Sasuke had desired to keep his teammate safe and Naruto had felt the same way; it was what Kakashi-sensei had talked about all along, working together for a goal, cooperating to defend your comrades. The days after that were oddly calm and uneventful, the pair still mocking each other and arguing like they always had, but more in a jovial sense like friends did than out of true spite. After that mission Sakura would have sworn that this was the dawn of a new, less contentious chapter in the history of Team 7.

So now that those events had passed, why couldn’t those stubborn idiots just admit what had happened, why were they now being so prideful and arrogant to go and wreck what little trust and respect they had built up for each other? It’s like they were trying to feign ignorance that anything out of the ordinary had occurred between them in the first place, that those events had never actually happened. Why were these two now so stubbornly refusing to accept how they had felt and getting along worse than ever because of it? Why were Sasuke and Naruto more at each other’s throats, both more spiteful of the other after experiencing a trauma that should have brought them closer together? It wasn’t a bad thing caring about the safety of your comrades, so why were these guys acting like it was, like they were _ashamed_ of what had conspired between them? Even Sakura could tell that they didn’t hate each other nearly as much as they claimed based on their recent contradictory actions, that beneath their sometimes violently opposite exteriors there was a little seed of camaraderie drilled into their thick skulls by Kakashi-sensei’s lecturing waiting to sprout into a full fledged plant. Sure, maybe they still didn’t _like_ each other very much, but Sakura had certainly expected them to put a bit more effort into teamwork after those emotional and supposedly changing events.

Sadly, the exact opposite had happened instead, Sasuke and Naruto’s relationship now more tense and fraughtful than ever. Sakura hadn’t seen them have any major fights out of the ordinary since they had come back home, hadn’t witnessed any further changes in the dynamic of their odd partnership, so just what in the world was causing them to act this way, so beyond the range of their usual relationship? What caused all their previous efforts to suddenly fall apart? Just what sort of feelings were they bottling up and ignoring that were making them act this way? If Sakura had to name the condition she believed them to be suffering from it would have been called 'emotional constipation.' Gross and childish? Perhaps. But it expertly defined the whole situation in just two words.

The whole situation was _seriously_ starting to get on Sakura's nerves; their typical relentless fighting was bad enough to deal with all the time, but this new mood of increased hatred between them was very quickly wearing down on her last nerve. Sakura may have liked Sasuke very much, but the childish attitude he displayed when he fought with Naruto was something that was majorly unattractive to her. It was very unappealing when he acted this way, stooping down so low to metaphorically sling mud at Naruto when Sasuke _should_ be acting as mature and composed as he normally was and just rise above Naruto’s provocations. Just why on earth was Sasuke always ten times more irritable and combative whenever he was around Naruto? What was it about Naruto in particular that drove him so much more crazy than anyone else? Sakura had never been able to figure it out, couldn’t understand why Sasuke allowed Naruto to get to him so much, what specifically made him dislike Naruto so much that he broke his cool demeanor just to fight with him. It was so… _different_ from how Sasuke acted around her, much to Sakura's disappointment. Sakura wished Sasuke would take notice of her the way he did Naruto and show her the same amount of personal attention. In their years together in the Academy she had never seen the detached and  Sasuke take as much an interest in anyone as he had Naruto, for whatever reasons that entailed, either good or bad. …On second thought, after taking a look over to see that Sasuke’s expression right now seemed very irritable and tepid as his eyes glimmered darkly with clouded hate staring in the opposite direction of Naruto, Sakura realized that maybe it was a good thing after all that she didn’t get the same kind of reaction from Sasuke that Naruto did. If Sasuke said to her the kinds of things he said to Naruto she’d probably cry!

Sakura watched anxiously as Naruto began to mutter under his breath, likely chanting vile curses directed at Sasuke that he was too proud to speak aloud since they were ignoring each other at the moment. Sakura reluctantly braced herself for the inevitable; she knew if this situation drug out too much longer that Naruto and Sasuke would eventually get into another pointless shouting match. _Hurry up, Kakashi-sensei! Don’t leave me here alone with these guys!_ she silently begged her sensei to magically appear and rescue her from this predicament before her teammates exploded. To her misfortune though, Kakashi was three hours late for their meet up.

***

Kakashi Hatake stared solemnly at the memorial stone before him, the black rock inscribed with the names of those brave ninja who had sacrificed themselves in the line of duty for the sake of their comrades and village. The jounin came to this sacred place often, sometimes to fondly look back on memories of the friends and family he had lost throughout his tough life, and other times he simply laid back in the grass next to the memorial taking a breather to read from one of his favorite Make Out books; this place had a serene calmness to it that was hard to find elsewhere in the village, allowing Kakashi to clearly reflect on the past while he enjoyed his favorite pastime. One name in particular engraved on the stone stuck out for Kakashi, the name of someone who had forever changed his course in life and was unfortunately no longer here to see that transition he had undertaken since their departure from this world. It was a name that conjured up so many regrets…

_Hey, Obito. It’s been a while since I’ve been here to visit. Sorry about that, those brats have me pretty busy these days,_ Kakashi chuckled as he laid down a bouquet of flowers before the monument to honor his long lost teammate, addressing the deceased boy directly as Kakashi often did when he came here. That sort of one sided conversation, oddly enough it… helped. Talking to Obito, to Rin, to Minato-sensei, speaking to his fallen comrades as if they were still alive and well allowed Kakashi to feel less guilty that he was the only one of them that had survived, to feel like they were still here with him in spirit at least. Being here reminded the man of times gone by, which was both a good and a bad thing, allowing Kakashi to confront his past directly.

Now that he himself was a sensei, Kakashi felt sympathetic to what his own sensei must have had to put up with back then, all the squabbling and arguing he and Obito had gotten into all those years ago; it was exhausting and time consuming dealing with his own students day in and day out as they battled and raged at each other, so he often had less time for personal matters these days as he haplessly tried to gently mediate their fights to a better conclusion, but despite his workload Kakashi still tried to keep his former teammates updated with what was going on in his life. He viewed it as a responsibility of sorts; even in death, they were still his comrades and their fates and emotions were still intertwined together in the end.

_...You know, the way Sasuke and Naruto act around each other reminds me more and more every day of how we used to be, Obito, always fighting and arguing with each other over every stupid little thing. I can barely put up with it sometimes, I’m surprised Minato-sensei never got fed up with it and tossed us in a lake to cool our heads or something!_ It was truly remarkable how Naruto and Sasuke seemed to be acting out the same kinds of heated arguments he and Obito had once had in their youth, the two boys replaying a script that was written long ago. It was amusing how similar they were in terms of personality and character at times, how much Naruto and Sasuke reminded Kakashi of the Obito and Kakashi of yesteryear… but on the other hand, it was also something that was very frightening for the man to see being acted out in front of him like a specter from his past; Kakashi unfortunately knew all too well what lay down that path, he had seen that story play out with his own two eyes and it hadn't ended well. Hatred, jealousy, revenge, bitterness, whether it had been himself and Obito or his two students, Kakashi knew that there was nothing good that came from those feelings.

_...Although, now that I think about it, their case might be a little different than ours,_ Kakashi mused, recalling Naruto’s sudden interest in his own fine taste in literature and the boy’s curious questions about getting attention and respect from someone you had an interest in. Despite the boy's attempts to mask his true intentions Kakashi saw through his efforts clearly. For someone who so often claimed he hated Sasuke, Naruto _was_ pretty desperate to get Sasuke to change his opinion of him by any means, obviously eager to gain his rival’s respect and attention. A remarkable amount of what the blond genin did was to draw Sasuke’s attention to himself, working hard to ensure that Sasuke saw him as a worthy adversary. He could deny and hide it all he wanted, but Kakashi could plainly see that Naruto craved Sasuke’s approval in particular more than anyone else’s, even his own. To think he would even ask Kakashi about the matter–even if it was in a very roundabout and needlessly hypothetical way–was testament to how deeply Naruto truly desired Sasuke’s acceptance. He would have probably screamed and fumed at Kakashi for saying so, but the jounin could easily tell that Naruto was gradually becoming more and more attached to Sasuke, in his own weird little way.

For his own part, Sasuke seemed oddly closer to Naruto these days as well. Kakashi could hardly believe the tale Naruto spun of what had conspired when he and Sasuke had been trapped inside Haku’s jutsu together, how Sasuke had taken a near-fatal hit meant for him and how he had sought to avenge Sasuke after that. When Kakashi later confronted the boy with this story, Sasuke gruffly played down those events and his part in them, neither confirming nor denying them and avoiding all questions about the subject from Kakashi, but he hadn’t seemed to be doing so out of a sense of modesty; Sasuke seemed to actually be _embarrassed_ about what he had done, bashfully detached from the topic like it was something he wasn't proud of. It was remarkable; the Sasuke that had first been assigned to Team 7 would have _never_ done something like that. He was clearly having trouble with the emotions he was experiencing and how exactly to deal with them, but it seemed that Sasuke was finally gradually coming to accept Naruto as a fellow comrade one cautious, difficult step at a time.

Kakashi hoped that this was a sign things were changing between the two, that their relationship was incrementally becoming better oriented towards what was required of them as shinobi. Whatever the case, the pair were undeniably _different_ than they had been before, so that was a small victory at least. He remembered how oddly they had been acting on a recent mission, how Naruto and Sasuke had been so carefully avoiding each other, which was very atypical for the pair that loved to butt heads and oppose one another at every turn. Something between them was changing, their relationship was beginning to shift in a new direction, but whether that was for better or for worse, Kakashi didn’t yet know. It was still a mystery that was quite intriguing to Kakashi, like a big unfinished puzzle, and a few more pieces had now fallen neatly into place. He was now beginning to make out more of the picture, gradually able to see how much of an effect those two had on each other, no matter how much they disputed that fact. Their relationship was so similar in motive and emotion to the connection that he and Obito had long ago, but it was also _different_ in some critical ways, somehow separate from what Kakashi and his comrade had once shared despite those similarities. Naruto and Sasuke had something else going on behind the scenes which considerably intrigued the sensei, a swath of suppressed emotions and belligerent denial, a type of closeness and connection to each other that he and Obito certainly _didn’t_ have back then, but whatever that connection actually _was_ the jounin wasn’t entirely sure yet. 'Yet' being the operative word there; digging up dirt on his students was part of his job, or at least that's what Kakashi told himself. Soon enough he would understand those two better than they understood themselves, and then Kakashi might be able to use that info to push them a little bit to become better ninj and better teammates... Or to mess with them and pick on them, depending on his mood, of course.

_...Well, whatever,_ Kakashi shrugged it off, not sure of what exactly was going on with the two boys anymore, of just what was running through their minds as they learned new things about each other and grew closer as comrades through the struggle and suffering of battle, but content to leave it be for the time being. It wasn’t exactly a _bad_ turn of events and whatever was really going on was between them and only them. No one else had any right to intervene in their personal matters and to try to make them act a certain way. They both deserved their privacy, but more importantly than that those punks also had to figure things out for themselves, had to come to understand their own feelings before they could do anything about it. Whether they argued, worked together, or whatever else Naruto and Sasuke chose to do, it was entirely up to them in the end; if Kakashi forced the lesson on them then it was pointless and the ridiculously stubborn boys would likely ignore him anyways. If he came between them and tried to force them to work things out then it would likely only make things worse than they already were and send the whole team down in flames. Kakashi wasn’t about to butt in and dictate their lives for them; Naruto and Sasuke ultimately had to come to their own conclusions and make their own choices in life. That was to say the jounin wasn’t _extremely_ interested in whatever was going on with that pair these days, he just had no intentions on interfering with the process of their change. _As long as it doesn't get in the way of missions it’s probably a good thing for them, actually. Some real human interaction would do both of them a world of good. They both need the company someone they can trust in, someone they can depend on. I just hope they can get past their differences in the end._

_I know how Sasuke feels so well because I pretty much am Sasuke. I used to be exactly like him, so superior and stubborn and angry at everyone. But being that inflexible and cut off from your comrades only leads to tragedy in the end. I know that all too well. Hopefully with time Sasuke will learn soon that he can rely on us, that we’re here to help him, not hold him back. He’s spent far too much time proudly stewing in his hatred, he needs to learn how to be around people again. And on the other hand, Naruto needs to get over his complex and learn to work with Sasuke instead of against him. Having a rival is great only if they build you up and push you to better yourself, but the way those two fight? Nothing good comes of that kind of competition, that kind of hate. Deep down Naruto’s so desperate for recognition, for a friend, but his stubborn rivalry blinds him to the fact that he and Sasuke could actually be friends if they tried. It’s hard for him with the way he’s been treated over the years, but he needs to learn to trust us, that we aren’t his enemies, including Sasuke. Those two brats share a lot in common, and more than anything they need a good environment to grow up in, they need hope and friendship put back into their lives, so they both can have people who they can rely on._

_I really worry for those kids. I’m trying to help them without butting in too much, trying to build Team 7 into the family that both Naruto and Sasuke need so badly, but… I don’t know if it’s working. I don't know if I'm doing what I should be doing. I just hope that they don’t have to walk down the same sad path we did, right Obito? I don’t want them to experience the things we did._ Kakashi didn’t want those two to go through the trauma he had in life and follow along his same path that they were already walking down, to have to watch a teammate die before your eyes, to be too late to start a friendship when there should have been one all along, to have to _kill_ another teammate with your own bare hands, to feel like you failed your sensei when he needed your support the most. He was too late to save Obito. Or Rin. Or Minato-sensei. They were all dead and gone. It killed Kakashi to think those things, but it was the _truth_ and it could never be undone no  matter how much he wished those things had only been nightmares. But he _wasn’t_ too late to put Sasuke and Naruto and Sakura on the right path. Kakashi could still help them avoid the failings that had entrapped his team and left him all alone as the last surviving member. The man could ensure that they had a happier story than the one his team had ended up with. He could at least do that much…

Kakashi drifted away from his long interior monologue directed towards his deceased teammate and  back into the present moment, suddenly realizing it was far passed the time he had instructed his students to meet up. When Kakashi came to this hallowed place he often lost all sense of time and place, caught up in his memories of comrades long since departed, people whose smiling faces he wished he could see once more. But the only place he could see them any longer was in his memories of years gone by. _Oh well,_ he sighed, looking down at the pocket watch in his hand and realizing not only was he late, but that he was actually very, _very_ late. _Hmmm, I wonder what excuse I should use today…_

***

_He’s always making me look bad!_ Naruto grumbled and grit his teeth, stewing over his failure to show up Sasuke once again on today's mission. Sakura lugged him along like he was little more than extra baggage, supporting his exhausted body as they plodded along. His face was bruised and beaten, wounds acquired from fighting during the mission, yet the oh-so-perfect Sasuke hadn’t a single scratch on him. No matter what he did, Naruto just couldn’t ever get a break and actually manage to beat that smug jerk at anything! Sasuke was always three steps ahead of him, making all of Naruto’s efforts look like child’s play. The fact that Sasuke was always hogging the spotlight by being a big hero, one-upping him at every opportunity, that really pissed Naruto off! He wanted to make Sasuke beg him for help, have _Sasuke_ be the one in trouble and needing rescue, even if it was just only once. Just once Naruto wanted to feel that pride in himself and finally take his rival down a peg, or at least get that asshole to stop calling him a loser all the time! Was that too much to ask?! _He keeps stealing the show and making himself look cool all the time!_

“You can’t even take care of yourself. Jeez, how pathetic,” Sasuke muttered pointedly, noting Naruto’s beat up appearance as he walked along ahead of his teammates.

That insult stabbed right at Naruto like a sword through his heart. He was trying so hard, yet this asshole was _still_ looking down on him after everything. Naruto was about to snap at any moment. Seriously, he was going to deliver his fist direct express mail to Sasuke’s annoying smart mouth. His frustration with Sasuke’s attitude of late was quickly reaching its boiling point. That cauldron of irritation was broiling deep inside Naruto for a number of reasons–shame, confusion, and frustration to name a few–and it was so hard to keep it in any more. Holding back his urges of slugging Sasuke took a lot of effort.

_First he freaks out for no reason and leaves right in the middle of what we were doing the other night, and now this. Ugh, Sasuke you're being such an unbelievable bastard these days!_ Why was Sasuke being even more of a smug show-off than usual? Why was he acting far more bitter and dickish to Naruto lately? Naruto rarely understood Sasuke, but he was finding he was getting less and less about the boy every day as their relationship twisted into this mess of jumbled anger and lack of communication. More than ever, Sasuke was driving Naruto nuts with that punchable smirk and cocky words designed to humiliate him. “Dammit!” Naruto cursed, the veins bulging out of his head angrily. This unwarranted treatment directed at him, this pretentious assholery of Sasuke’s was getting on Naruto’s last nerve.

The boys were each dealing with their own simmering frustrations and interpersonal tension and using those twisted up feelings as an excuse to take it out on each other. When they fought before there had usually been a point to it, a motive behind the madness, but this on the other hand was just pointless bickering designed to mask how irritated and annoyed with each other they were of late, to hide all the fears and misunderstandings contained in their new physical relationship. One could say they were having immense trouble accepting their new connection and were now retaliating against each other for those perceived insults and affronts, going way overboard and trying hard to either deny it all and return to things as they had been before or to wreck it completely so there was nothing between them anymore that would cause such troubled feelings.

“Seems like our teamwork is suffering a lot these days…” Kakashi lamented with a deep sigh. He had thought Naruto and Sasuke had been getting along fairly well recently, but that seemed to have all gone up in flames over the past few missions, their moods getting progressively worse with each outing the team took. The two boys had been so spectacularly successful working together in the Land of Waves, going far beyond what Kakashi had thought them capable of at such a young age, and for a very brief, almost dreamlike period afterwards they had been far less of a chore to put up with. That time unfortunately seemed to have lasted just about as long as the blink of an eye before they went back to their previous state of conflict. First they were just ignoring each other, but now they were going out of their way just to start crap, almost as if they enjoyed yelling at each other and causing the other misery. These kids and their constant bickering sure were a lot to put up with day after day. If Kakashi hadn’t of had his beloved Make Out book series to console him he probably would have gone totally crazy from their unrelenting back and forth taunts.

“You hear that, Sasuke? You’re ruining our teamwork, always trying to be the hero and stealing the spotlight!” Naruto shouted aggressively at a completely uninterested Sasuke as the raven haired genin calmly walked away from his furious teammate, ignoring Naruto’s outburst.

_What a case of the pot calling the kettle black_ , Kakashi remarked wearily. _You’re both at fault here. Stop being idiots and realize it already. Siiiigh. They get along like cats and dogs. ...Well, at least they’re housebroken._ Teamwork needed mutual cooperation, and unfortunately both these boys were showing _none_ of that anymore. Both of them were responsible for the situation, but both were also too proud and stubborn to actually fix it. What a colossal mess this was. Kakashi had promised to stay out of it, but that tactic was seriously trying his patience, despite how much he knew it was right. About now he really just wanted to give the spiteful little punks a good hard punch each followed by a long lecture. But he also knew that probably wouldn't work to resolve their issues.

“You’re the one doing that yourself, moron,” Sasuke sharply insisted, passing judgement back on Naruto, which made the blond even angrier with him. “If you want me to stop making you look bad…” he trailed off, turning his head over his shoulder and gazing back at Naruto, whose fists were balled tight in anger as he tried to hold himself back from slugging a teammate. “...Then you just need to get stronger than me…” Sasuke continued his statement with a stern, serious look before turning back around and walking off. There was an odd sort of look deep in Sasuke’s eyes as he uttered these words. It nearly made Naruto explode in fury, but it didn’t actually seem designed to do that. It almost seemed like Sasuke was _daring_ Naruto to come after him, challenging him to do better. If it had come from the mouth of anyone else it would have almost been seen as an encouraging remark…

***

As was usual with him, Kakashi was once again absurdly late for the meeting with his team. Another day, another tediously long wait for their lazy, forgetful sensei. His trio of  students stood grouped together, impatiently awaiting their teacher’s long overdue arrival. Sasuke waited quietly–albeit not patiently–leaning against the hand railing of the wooden bridge while Naruto and Sakura paced back and forth across the wooden planks beneath them and loudly complained in a vain effort.

“He tells us to get here early and then _he’s_ the one who’s late! I overslept today, so I didn’t even have time to blow dry my hair! Why do you always do this to us Kakashi-sensei?!” Sakura shouted aloud, lamenting Kakashi’s very rude disregard for schedules and time frames. How the heck did someone with so little respect for others become a jounin in the first place? Did he find _joy_ in their suffering or something?

“I overslept too! I forgot to change my underwear and brush my teeth because of that!” Naruto nodded vigorously, agreeing in unison with Sakura’s protesting sentiments.

_Ugh, why do they have to be so intense all the time?_ Sasuke bemoaned his teammates’ attitudes, trying to remain calm at the moment, but sorely irritated by his sensei’s lack of decorum and his two partner’s noisy shouts of frustration so early in the morning. Their pointless, annoying complaints were starting to give him a major headache. Kakashi would get here when he got here, no need to whine about it. It's not like yelling about it would change anything. That wasn’t to say his sensei wasn’t also getting on Sasuke's nerves; that guy might have been a talented, strong ninja, but he was even more air headed than Naruto sometimes.

_...Wait, did he just say he didn't brush his teeth?_ Sasuke worryingly realized moments after hearing Naruto’s overly loud complaining, eyes snapping wide in shock as Sasuke tried carefully to maintain his calm demeanor before his protesting teammates. It had taken time for his brain to process exactly what the noisy loser had said and when the statement had finally reached his brain it set off alarms in his head. _Oh god, please let that be just a one time occurrence,_ Sasuke pleaded to the fates in horror. Things were already bad enough between them as it was, Naruto's aggressive intimate actions driving Sasuke's already conflicted brain to the brink. The thought of Naruto's filthy tongue plunging into his mouth, the possibility that the loser indeed hadn't brushed his teeth beforehand causing Sasuke to shiver in disgust. _I swear, if I find out he didn't brush his teeth even one time before we did ‘that’ I’m going to be sick. And then I’m going to throttle him._ If he found out Naruto had dared to kiss him without brushing his teeth first Sasuke swore there would be hell to pay. Naruto Uzumaki would regret the day he forgot to brush his teeth.

“...That’s really gross,” Sakura replied squeamishly, mimicking Sasuke's own unvoiced worries, to which Naruto only sheepishly laughed.

After much waiting and complaining–much to Sasuke’s disappointment, there would be no peace and quiet for him this morning–finally Kakashi appeared out of nowhere, absurdly acting as if nothing were amiss and cheerily greeting his fellow comrades. “Morning guys! Sorry I’m late, I got lost today,” he called out from his perch atop one of the torii gates on either end of the bridge, audaciously not even giving them a proper apology.

“You liar!” Naruto and Sakura both shouted angrily up at him. How dare he keep them waiting with such an obviously bull crap excuse! How could he treat his poor students this way?

“Anyways,” the absent-minded jounin interjected before they could begin a rant against him, completely bypassing his student’s complaints about the endless horrible tedium he had inflicted on them. “It might be a bit sudden, but I’ve decided to nominate you guys for the Chunin Exams.”

***

_Why is it always Sasuke!? It’s always Sasuke this, Sasuke that! What about me, I’m here too, you know!_ Naruto fumed as the strange green clothed genin named Rock Lee and Sasuke trash talked each other and prepared for battle. The Chunin Exams hadn’t even _started_ yet and already Naruto was being pushed out of the way and ignored by everyone who approached. All _they_ cared about was fighting against Sasuke, testing their abilities against the renown raw talent and power of the great Uchiha clan. Everyone went on and on about how cool and awesome Sasuke was, Naruto was so sick of it all that his head might explode if he heard one more challenge or compliment thrown Sasuke’s way while Naruto himself was left wanting just a single interested contender for himself, anyone who took him seriously and wanted to fight him. It wasn’t that Naruto didn’t also agree that Sasuke was strong, and to some extent he definitely admired that strength his ally possessed, Naruto simply loathed the feeling of constantly being in his teammate’s shadow, struggling to make a name for himself and win recognition. No matter where they went, no matter what he did, no matter how hard he tried, no one ever took notice of him. Everyone bypassed him and only took notice of Sasuke. No one ever wanted to ask his name and challenge _him_ . Again and again Naruto was mocked and denied importance, every interested challenger caring only about Sasuke and not even bothering with him at all. _First those weird guys from the Sand Village the other day and now this Bushy Brows dude, too! Everyone keeps ignoring me!_

“Wait a minute,” Naruto called out to the other ninja, interrupting their conversation. “Let me take care of this guy. It’ll only take me two minutes to take finish him,” he said confidently, itching to prove himself and work out some of his building irritation with being constantly overlooked. Kicking this weirdo’s butt would do well to make people stop looking down on him. Sasuke was right there too, so taking this guy on was also a great chance for Naruto to prove his ability to Sasuke once and for all, making this opportunity doubly important for Naruto. If he could win it would open a world of opportunities for him. People would start taking him seriously... _Sasuke_ would start taking him seriously.

“I do not wish to fight you. The one I want to face off against right now is Uchiha,” Lee replied adamantly, straight up refusing Naruto’s challenge without a second thought.

Naruto’s blood began to boil as Sasuke _again_ stole the spotlight, the mere mention of his rival’s name setting off a trigger in his head like a time bomb prepped to explode. “I’m so sick of hearing about Sasuke all the time!” Naruto yelled out as he charged at Rock Lee, determined to make the weird fellow his opponent whether the strange young man wanted to fight him or not. However, Lee deftly avoided Naruto’s careless anger-infused attack, his rapid movements little more than green hued blurs to Naruto. At that moment Lee was calm, while Naruto was erratic, giving the Bushy Brows kid the upper hand and allowing him to easily outmaneuver Naruto’s ill-thought-out attacks with little effort. The green garbed boy swung his foot around in a wide arc, delivering a powerful spinning kick directly to Naruto’s gut, sending him tumbling–or perhaps flying was a better word–across the floor, his limp body only coming to a halt as Naruto crashed hard enough into the wall to knock him into a confused daze.

_This sucks. I’m so sick of this_ , Naruto lamented as Sasuke stepped up and began his own match with Lee and Naruto faded from consciousness, thoughts of bitter annoyance at forever being bested and looked down on by everyone the last ones running through his head as he blacked out.

***

Beads of sweat dripped down Sasuke’s face after his shocking defeat served up by Lee, the boy standing perfectly still in ominous silence. Naruto couldn’t believe what little of the fight he had seen after waking up from his knocked out state. And he didn’t just mean the odd genin Lee and his even stranger teacher Gai, though their two man comedy act certainly was a very unusual sight to behold. _Sasuke… lost? How is that even possible? Besides Kakashi-sensei, Sasuke’s the strongest guy I know._ Sasuke actually losing a match was something Naruto had never contemplated happening. That guy seemed so perfect and untouchable all the time, it was so far from Naruto’s mind that his defeat didn’t even seem like a realistic possibility. He had never thought he would see the day that his jerk faced rival would be brought low by defeat. But shockingly Sasuke _had_ lost this fight. And he wasn't taking it well.

Sasuke’s hands were balled up so tightly into fists that his knuckles were starting to turn white from the pressure and he was noticeably trembling with poorly contained shock and anger. His teeth were clenched together as he growled in irate disbelief. This was a side of Sasuke that Naruto had never seen before, a side of him that was strangely uncomfortable to see. Just how badly shaken up had this loss made him?

“I thought the Uchiha clan was supposed to be strong. Guess that’s all just a bunch of talk,” Naruto nonchalantly goaded his partner intentionally after rising to his feet and dusting himself off. He had never seen Sasuke like this; the boy’s eyes had an intense, almost worried sheen to them. No, maybe worried wasn’t the best word… perhaps fearful fit the bill better. It was as if this loss had cracked Sasuke’s mask of calm perfectness, broken his confidence and made him doubtful of himself. It was honestly… hard seeing Sasuke look like that. It made Naruto feel very uncomfortable for some reason, to see his teammate so shaken and out of it. Naruto found he didn’t want Sasuke to continue looking that way, so he decided to light a friendly fire under Sasuke’s butt to restore his temporarily faltering confidence and push him forward. It usually worked for Naruto when people insulted him and doubted him, gave him that extra push he needed when he was down to get back up just to show everyone they were wrong about him, so it was worth a shot.

“Shut up! I’ll beat him next time…” Sasuke snapped at Naruto unconvincingly, his eyes cast down towards the ground as he panicked disbelievingly over his surprising loss. He had never seen this coming, never expected to lose to a flippant guy like Rock Lee.

“Whatever, you just got your ass kicked and you know it. That Bushy Brows must have trained really hard every single day. Way more than you ever did,” Naruto continued to press at the subject despite his comrade’s obvious dislike of the topic, Naruto not willing to let it go so easily.

Sasuke stood there completely silent in spite of Naruto’s harsh words directed at his very pride, not even retaliating with insults like he usually did. ...Naruto realized then that maybe he had said too much. There _was_ a point where the effort to shove someone who was faltering back into line became just plain bullying of someone who was down. Maybe in his efforts to encourage Sasuke to break out of his unusual state Naruto had accidentally crossed that line. He hadn’t intended to rub it in out of spite, didn’t want Sasuke to feel bad about what had happened, quite the opposite in truth; Naruto wanted to help _restore_ his rival’s shaken ego. One loss was annoying for Naruto, but for someone like Sasuke, who constantly desired to show off his damn stupid perfect superiority to everyone else, it must have been _agonizing_ . ...Besides that, the face that Sasuke was currently making, so full of rage at the reality of defeat, was very difficult to look at. It wasn’t exactly scary, but it wasn’t something Naruto was accustomed to seeing either. It gave him an icy feeling in the pit of his stomach, a feeling he didn’t like at all. It wasn’t that Naruto wasn’t also annoyed with his own record breaking brief match with Lee, he was just too stunned with Sasuke’s loss to the Bushy Brow genin and his unnerving reaction to that fact to work up any anger about the issue at the moment. _Maybe I went too far…_ Naruto worried to himself as he noticed Sasuke clench his hands even tighter from the corner of his eye. As Naruto began stumbling in his head trying to think up a good apology and what words to use to ensure Sasuke understood his intent–they couldn’t be _too_ nice since it was Sasuke the jerk after all–he quickly found his concern was not needed, though.

All at once Sasuke regained his composure, shaking off his momentarily disturbed appearance and grinning smugly with confidence and pride once more. The doubt and worry melted away from his features, as if his earlier expression had only been an illusion in Naruto’s head. “I think the Chunin Exams are going to be pretty interesting. Sakura, Naruto. You guys ready to go?” Sasuke questioned the teammates standing to either side of him, allowing Naruto to breathe a sigh of relief.

“Hell yeah!” Naruto shouted excitedly in response. _That’s the Sasuke I know_ , Naruto thought to himself with a smile, relieved that his prodding had worked and his comrade was back to normal, that the worrying visage he had worn was now gone.

***

_We’re seriously going to die. I can’t calm down. He’s just too strong!_ Sasuke dismayed as the enemy before him and Sakura edged closer step by step, the boy’s rational thoughts completely replaced by the surge of adrenaline as fear overwhelmed his senses. No animal living in this hellhole, no giant snake or carnivorous beast crawling through this forest they were in could compare to the pressing danger that this man bearing down on them was; he was truly a monster without equal. The second test of the Chunin Exams was now well underway in the dark and gloomy Forty-Fourth Training Ground, the grimly named Forest of Death. Even as difficult and treacherous as the previous written test had been for the prospective chunin, no mere piece of paper–no matter how badly it had stressed their intelligence and tested their determination, no matter how emotionally and psychologically taxing that exam had been for them–could compare to the sheer terror of this moment.

The thin, pale, snake-like man stood menacingly before Sasuke and Sakura as the pair cowered in the face of his insidious might. Even just looking into his eyes caused waves of fear and dread to rise up inside Sasuke like a hurricane of negativity. The assailant’s killing intent couldn’t be ignored or denied; that bloodthirsty pressure emanating from him felt like all that he desired in life was to cause murder and destruction. Just one look into his horrible predator's gaze was all it took to make the genin tremble in pure, primal terror, something much deeper than mere everyday fear, something felt right down to the bones. It was the kind of thing that twisted Sasuke’s stomach into knots, making him queasy and delirious as images of imminent death flashed before his eyes, that dread working its way into his system like a poison and causing him to violently expel the contents of his stomach in broken shock. Next to him Sakura sat weeping in disbelieving terror, her mental state unable to stay intact under these circumstances as the snake man stared them down, the bloodlust emanating off of him driving the genin into madness as they became his prey.

Sasuke’s instincts were _screaming_ at him to run away right now, that psychological flight-or-flight response kicking in, but he just couldn’t move, frozen in unadulterated terror breathing down his neck. The boy’s legs refused to budge even though he knew he _had_ to move or he would be killed, but they were still stiff and unmoving, his muscles utterly paralyzed with fear. _We have to run! If we don’t we’ll definitely die!_ This enemy was unlike any they had ever faced, causing Sasuke to experience a kind of horror he hadn't felt in years, digging up a fear that had been buried inside him ever since _that_ day when his brother had destroyed everything. Just like back when he had felt so much terror looking at his brother’s face splattered with their parent’s blood, eyes cold beyond all recognition as they had stared down at Sasuke like he was a small animal to be devoured, this enemy too was completely beyond Sasuke's abilities as well; just as had been true with Itachi, there was no way Sasuke could defeat the snake man. Even so, how would they be able to run away with someone so much stronger pursuing them? Where could they possibly go that their attacker wouldn’t follow? They had tried to escape before, Sasuke driving his kunai into his thigh to break the spell of fear cast over himself, but their pursuer had still hunted them down and found them again. Was there no hope for survival?

As the man rapidly slithered up the tree in a vile, inhuman manner as he prepared to lunge at his dinner, suddenly a stream of shurikens came flying out of nowhere aimed at the creepy attacker, halting his ascent up the tree in it’s tracks as the blades impacted just before him.

“I’m sorry Sasuke, but I forgot the code word!” Naruto called out, standing on tree branch high above them confidently looking down on the precarious situation his friends had gotten into in his momentary absence, glad that he had made it just in time. The snake man glared up at the impertinent one who would dare intrude on his malicious fun, eyes glinting dangerously with anger as the boy shouted to his comrades.

“...Naruto, I know you’re trying to play the hero and save us, but this one is on a whole different level than us! Just run away and save yourself!” Sasuke shouted agitatedly upon the sudden appearance of his loser comrade, knowing all too well what this foe was capable of and that they had no chance stopping him. Naruto ignored his warning, though, and instead continued his vigil on the tree branch above them, glowering down at the serpentine assailant who would dare to attack his teammates and spouting off big insults and threats Sasuke knew he couldn’t back up. It was almost touching that Naruto was sticking up for Sasuke and Sakura, that he cared so deeply about their safety in this precarious situation, but this seriously wasn’t the time for any of those dumb heroics of his!

_That idiot just doesn’t get it. What should I do? All of us are going to get killed. ...There’s only one way…_ There was only one thing he could do anymore that would ensure they didn’t all die…

“I’ll give you the scroll,” Sasuke informed the attacker in a loud but desperate and defeated tone, taking their all important mission objective Heaven Scroll out from his pack and holding in his hand to show the enemy he wasn’t intending to deceive. “Just take it and let us leave.” It broke his sense of self-respect to say this, but what good would that be if he was dead? What use was pride if it got himself and his teammates killed?

“What the hell, Sasuke?! What’s wrong with you?! Why would you give our scroll away to the enemy?!” Naruto screamed out at him in disbelief at hearing words he never thought he would hear Sasuke say. Surrender was just so not his style.

But despite Naruto’s vigorous objections, Sasuke had already tossed the scroll to their assailant in defiance of Naruto’s wishes, sending it flipping end over end through the air as it careened towards the enemy’s grasp. Realizing Sasuke’s loss of sense, Naruto swiftly leapt off his tree branch suspended high in the air and dashed for the scroll as it flew in-between Sasuke and the snake man, catching it in mid air just in time and keeping their objective safe for the moment.

“You moron, what are you doing?! Don’t you understand what kind of situation we’re in?!” Sasuke yelled at Naruto for interrupting his peace offering done in order to save their lives. _Just for once would you listen to me?!_ _Stop playing the hero!_ But his angry shouts at his rival were met only with a fist smacking hard into his face, interrupting any of his complaints. Naruto landed next to Sasuke after catching the scroll and without so much as another word he whirled around to clobber Sasuke square in the face, hard enough for blood to come flying out of his mouth and nose and sending him flying backwards onto another large branch to separate them.

“I don’t remember the code word, so I can’t test it out… but you’re a fake, aren’t you?” Naruto panted out in exertion and anger as he glared suspiciously at the boy he had just punched, keeping just far enough away to react quickly in case his suspicions turned out to be true and this Sasuke was just a doppelganger working with the enemy. Just as important as the safety of their scroll, Sasuke’s uncharacteristic actions were bothering Naruto. Sasuke wouldn’t do things like this. He couldn’t believe it.

“You complete dumbass, I’m the real thing!” _What the hell, Naruto? You should know me well enough by now to know it’s the real me. After all, I could tell when this guy tried to copy you…_ Sasuke thought, almost hurt at Naruto’s accusing words. Earlier when Naruto had departed into the bushes to heed the call of nature, a distinctly different Naruto had come back in his place, a transformed enemy ninja seeking to get in a surprise attack on Sasuke and Sakura to steal their scroll. Almost instantly, Sasuke had realized it wasn’t the real Naruto from the way his shuriken holster was reversed–Naruto wore his on the right leg not the left like this doppelganger. Sasuke wasn’t so easy to fool. And the second time too. There was no way a blockhead like Naruto would have been able to memorize that ridiculously long password. He had become much more familiar with Naruto’s personality and habits than he would care to admit, but this time it had saved them from two surprise attacks. He had a keen eye and had been with his teammates long enough to know them fairly well. So it did disappoint him a bit that Naruto couldn’t tell it was the real him because a ninja should have sharper instincts than that, but also, oddly enough, because Sasuke thought that somehow Naruto knew him better than that, had more trust in his teammate.

“You’re lying!” Naruto insisted, his voice echoing through the forest and stunning both Sasuke and Sakura with its intensity. “The Sasuke I know isn’t a stupid coward like you! You’re the one who doesn’t understand the situation. What guarantee do we have that he won’t just kill us after we give him the scroll?” This _had_ to be a fake Sasuke! It was some sort of trick, Naruto was sure of it. Because the alternative was… The _real_ Sasuke… he wouldn’t give up like this, he wouldn’t chicken out and choke at the critical moment. That didn’t sound like Sasuke at all. Not that stubborn guy who had saved Naruto back in the Land of Waves even though it might have killed him. Naruto refused to believe it! His important rival wouldn't do something like that no matter what, he was better than that, so this _had_ to be a fake!

Sasuke’s eyes opened wide in shock as Naruto continued glaring down at him. He was so afraid, so desperate to continue surviving that he hadn’t even thought of that possibility, that the enemy likely wouldn’t hold up their part of the bargain hadn't crossed his mind. He had shamefully allowed his fears to overcome his rationality. Naruto’s fierce gaze bored directly into Sasuke's own bewildered eyes, so deep down that it almost seemed as if Naruto was looking into his soul and becoming frustrated with what he had found laying there. But there wasn’t just anger in Naruto’s eyes. Beneath that emotion he also looked almost… _disappointed_ in Sasuke. His eyes reflected a deep disappointment in Sasuke’s behavior, something that startled Sasuke and made him uncomfortable.

“Hehe, you’re right! I can just kill you and take the scroll from your bodies, after all,” the pale man smiled viciously, cackling in amusement as his prey squirmed.

“You shut the hell up!” Naruto yelled, charging headlong at the enemy, disregarding any harm that could befall him against this demonic foe. If everyone else had become cowards and given up already, if even Sasuke was too chicken to fight anymore then he would have to do this all his own.

“Naruto, don’t! Run away!” _Stop! You’re going to die, you idiot! This is for real! Kakashi isn’t here to save us, and Sakura and I are too wounded to escape, but you at least can get away! You damn fool! Why are you always like this? Why can’t you ever listen?_ Sasuke just didn’t get it. Why was this loser so damn reckless all the time? Why did he always keep trying to prove a point, even when it was going to get him _killed_?

_I’ve lost my respect for you, Sasuke_ , Naruto thought as he charged blindly towards the enemy. His previously pristine image of his rival, someone who was both relentlessly frustrating and respectably admirable to him, had been tarnished by these events, and that was something that was tough to deal with. _I looked up to you, I wanted you to acknowledge me. You’re supposed to be strong! But you're just a big coward after all._ All that ran through Naruto’s mind as he dashed forward into certain doom was how disgusted he was with Sasuke at the moment, how bitterly upset he was with Sasuke’s actions.

***

“You alright, scaredy-cat?” Naruto taunted Sasuke with a weak grin as a stream of brilliantly scarlet blood dripped out his mouth and nose in a frightening sight. It was an insult Sasuke had once used against Naruto on their trip to the Land of Waves. It immediately struck a chord as Naruto said it, Sasuke understanding exactly what Naruto intended by the words; after that time Naruto had never backed down or been afraid of battle again, he had never again ran away or checked out. Sasuke knew Naruto had said it intentionally, trying to strike at him the same way Sasuke’s words had reformed him. Behind him a gargantuan snake was halted in its attempted attack on Sasuke, held back by Naruto’s mysterious and unbelievable burst of sudden strength. The malicious man who attacked then had summoned the massive serpent to do his bidding, having it toss Naruto about like a ragdoll smashing through the trees as he tried to keep up. But… some sort of fire had awoken in the boy during the one-sided fight, his appearance and manner somehow exactly the same and yet entirely different all at once, and then it was _him_ who was retaliating against the snake, pushing it back bit by bit with furious punches that seemed to defy all logic; how could such a small boy fight against that behemoth snake? Naruto was blocking the snake from getting to his comrade, mystically holding back the monster that was at least one hundred times his own size. As Sasuke watched this unbelievable feat he stood dumbstruck, baffled and amazed at the same time. But there was something else too. Naruto’s eyes… they were so strange in their appearance, fierce and unrelenting, almost animal-like. They were oddly transfixing, powerful and stalwart, yet calm and controlled at the same time. The changed boy labored for breath, obviously exhausted by the short battle with the assassin and his giant reptile, yet he still had charged out to halt the snake’s attack and guard Sasuke, despite his weariness.

_...Stop. Stop protecting me… Just please stop,_ Sasuke begged silently, shivering complacently as he stared into Naruto’s tried but determined eyes, unable to do or say anything at the moment. His heart was beating a mile a minute, an energetic bouncing from watching Naruto’s mystifying battle with the snake and his own close brush with death. No words would come from his mouth, his muscles frozen solid as if he were encased in ice despite Naruto’s predicament. He was too enthralled by this sight, by that bestial fire in Naruto’s eyes as the loser grinned confidently at him, holding back the monster serpent with all his might. The sight before him… now Sasuke understood what it must have been like for Naruto back in the Land of Waves, what kinds of things must have gone through his mind after Sasuke had taken the barrage of needles meant for him. _You could have run away. You stupid fool. Why for me? I don’t… need your protection, loser. I don’t want you getting killed on my account._

“Standing there like a helpless coward. There’s _no way_ you’re the Sasuke I know,” Naruto insisted as he glared defiantly into Sasuke’s eyes, once again trying to break Sasuke from his spell with words to egg him on. But Sasuke didn’t move a muscle, stuck between his fear of the death that was surely hunting them down and his tepid mixture of odd emotions on seeing Naruto’s secret immense power in action. It was Naruto before him, but it also _wasn’t_ him; Naruto didn’t have that kind of strength. Sasuke couldn’t believe it, that Naruto had this much power underneath the surface of his goofball exterior. But it was true. Looking into Naruto’s eyes, Sasuke immediately _knew_ it was no illusion or fake, that this inexplicably was the real Naruto trying to reach out to him right now.

Sasuke watched helplessly as the snake man’s incredibly long, vile tongue coiled out of his mouth and seized hold of Naruto, tightly wrapping around him and dragging the boy up on top of the giant snake's head as he flailed about trying to escape the slimy grasp. After lifting Naruto’s shirt up to reveal a strange black marking on his stomach, the serpentine assassin suddenly stabbed his clawed hand into Naruto’s gut with force, knocking the wind out of Naruto and causing the gutsy ninja to fall unconscious. He then carelessly tossed Naruto away, like the boy was no more than rubbish to be disposed of, sending him plummeting into the forest until his limp body was halted only by a kunai thrown by Sakura to keep him from falling to his death which caught on his shirt and pinned the unconscious blond to a nearby tree. Even then Sasuke didn’t move, still paralyzed despite the events unfolding before his eyes.

“Sasuke, Naruto might be clumsy and careless sometimes, but at least he’s trying! He’s not a coward like you are!” Sakura cried out desperately from behind him, trying to push him forward as well, to snap him out of his trance in this critical moment. But his body still would not budge. He was tried of these two telling him what to do, stricken with the fear of death, annoyed at Naruto’s damn heroics for his sake when the loser could have run away.

_Shut up…_

“Foolish little brother,” a dark voice from Sasuke’s past called out from the depths of his memories to him as he remembered those vile words spilling out of the mouth of that man whom he desired to kill so utterly and completely. “If you want to kill me then you have to hate!” A new feeling welled up inside him, Naruto, Sakura, his brother, the specter of death, all of them driving him in different ways and making him feel different things.

_Shut up!_

“Cling desperately to your pathetic life!” The bastard Sasuke had once called brother taunted him insidiously from inside his memories again and again, mocking his weakness.

_SHUT UP!_

Sasuke was finally broken from his trance, finally realizing just what was at stake. His own life, Naruto’s life Sakura life, it all depended on him now. Naruto… had tried to save him. That irritating moron had tried to protect him. That wasn’t something Sasuke was going to let stand. He wasn’t allow that idiot to show him up, that debt would be repaid. Sasuke swore that he wouldn’t fall here, grabbing a host of weapons from his pack and readying himself for battle against his terrifying foe, without fear or shame or anger. His determination had been reawakened, birthed anew by both feelings of bitter hatred towards that one man, and responsibility to his comrades in this grave hour of need. His teammates need him right now. And Itachi still survived somewhere out there, still unpunished for his violent treason against their family. _I have to live on in order to kill my brother. No way can I die here! I might be afraid, but… If I can’t risk my life against this guy, then how could I ever hope to kill Itachi? I can’t let my fear control me. ...I’ll show that mouthy Naruto just what I’m made of. I’ll beat this guy and when that loser wakes up I’ll rub it in his dumb face._

***

A pair of venomous fangs sinking into his neck. That was all Sasuke could feel in that instant: the vicious stinging pain as the enemy stretched out his long neck and suddenly struck him like a viper attacking it’s prey, those horribly sharp, inhuman teeth plunging deep into the soft muscle of his neck. That stinging sensation welling up in Sasuke’s neck and emanated quickly outwards felt like he was being injected with fiery poison, but that didn’t last long, though; it soon morphed into an excruciating stabbing, burning pain, beyond the initial torment he endured and almost unbearable in its ferocity. He fell to his knees, quivering in sheer misery as he screamed and writhed in agony, desperately clawing his fingers into the dirt out of frustration and suffering. It just wouldn’t stop, it was getting worse with every passing second, his physical suffering growing to levels he had never felt before. He already couldn’t bear the feeling as it coursed through his veins like thick oil, causing his entire body to shake violently as every cell in his body experienced misery, but it kept piling up, a horrible torture

_It hurts! It hurts so much! Help me! Please, someone help me! Kakashi, Sakura, Naruto! Please, anyone, do something! Where are you, Naruto?! Please, I need you to help me!_ Where was everybody?! He needed help, god did he need help, but they weren’t there, he could see them, he couldn’t hear them, his entire existence focused on this horrible pain, Sasuke’s world made small and dark, filled with only suffering and fear. In the face of this pain he lost all pride and

But there was nothing that could be done, nothing Sasuke’s comrades could do to help him; Sakura stood close beside him bewilderedly trying to calm him, but she had no knowledge of what to do at a moment like this, and Naruto was still passed out from his own battle with the terrifying villain named Orochimaru. Sasuke was utterly alone against the beast of this pain burning inside him, he had no one to help him fight against its overwhelming strength as the excruciating force sapped his strength of will. Sasuke continued to scream and cry out in horrible pain, his shrieks echoing out across the forest like those of an animal caught in a trap, until finally his young body could bear the suffering no longer and Sasuke collapsed to the ground, fading from the real world into a black nightmare full of terror and torment.

***

_Someone is crying. Who is it?_ Sasuke could hear the sound of whimpering echoing from all around him, the kind of broken, distraught weeping a child does when they are all alone in the world reverberating off of walls that he could not see. It was a sound that he knew quite well, a sound that disgusted him…

Suspended in this empty void was only himself and another. Tears flowed down a young black haired boy’s face. He was the only other person in this empty white place. “Mom and dad… they didn’t have to die…” he sobbed.

_What the hell? It’s me?!_ Sasuke remarked, looking down on a younger version of himself. He recalled those days after the Uchiha family was destroyed; he kept all his emotions inside of him, bottled them away as not to seem weak to himself or to others. He devoted himself entirely to strengthening his body, mind, and will to one day hunt down and kill the brother he had admired and loved so. But from time to time he couldn’t help but break down and cry alone in his big, now empty house, just like the younger Sasuke was now doing. He had been so young, been so powerless, that he felt compelled to cry in lonely frustration sometimes. He didn’t do so anymore. He was stronger than that now. The image of himself in tears made him feel sick to his stomach; it was hard to face the fact that he had been so weak before.

“If you don't have strength then you can’t do anything. Everything is impossible for you.”

_I have strength. I’m strong now!_

“Because I was weak, the clan whole was wiped out. Everyone died.”

_I was a little kid. What was I supposed to do?_

“You let everyone die,” his younger told him defiantly, the young boy’s face shifting from a weepy frown into a vicious, almost evil smile. The younger Sasuke began tearing away his face, peeling back the skin in layers. Underneath the skin was a second face, one with an unnerving snake pupil that stared menacingly at Sasuke.

_How was I supposed to stop Itachi?!_ he shouted defensively at the little him, though no words came from his mouth.

“And all you did watch watch as everyone was killed. All you did was cry like the weak person you are.”

_There was nothing I could do but run! He would have killed me too if I had tried to stop him!_

“Thing’s would be different if you had strength.”

_...Am I really that weak the way I am now? I thought I had become strong. Am I still too weak?_ Sasuke thought, the boy’s continued words chipping away more and more at his resistance.

And so Sasuke awoke from his deep nightmare, filled with an incredible power. His chakra was dark and fearsome, practically cutting the air like a knife, a cold energy pouring out of him. A new kind of strength coursed through his veins. He was an entirely different person, one stained with the awesome evil powers of the curse mark. The overwhelming, dark power of the Curse Mark filled his blood and soul. He accepted it as the power flowed into him, bathed in its darkness. This wondrous power that the young him had goaded him into accepting. He would _definitely_ kill Itachi with it.

***

_Again with this?_ Naruto thought as he woke from his slumber. Inside his underwear the disgusting sticky feeling he had grown accustomed to waking up to in the morning caused him to frown. It was one thing to have wet dreams while at home, but having one while out here in the Forest of Death it was just embarrassing. He had expected his little buddy to calm down considering the dangerous circumstances, but to no avail. Even getting injured in the last battle did nothing to dull the ache of unwanted boners.

After the three young ninja had been ambushed by the freaky snake guy and his three flunkies and forced to fend off their ferocious attack they had needed two days to recover from their extensive injuries, so they had camped out near a river in order to be able to defend themselves in case they were attacked again and be provided with fresh fish to eat. This part of the Chunin Exam was almost over and they still hadn’t acquired the other scroll. They _had_ to do so today or else it would be all over for them.

_This happens pretty much every day now._ Naruto cautiously looked around him, hoping his comrades weren't awake to notice his morning wood tenting in his pants. Dawn was still a couple hours away, the morning light not yet peeking through the trees. Sakura slumbered next to the small campfire and Sasuke was nowhere to be seen. _Jeez, what a mess,_ Naruto grimaced as he took a covert peek into his underwear, surveying the damage. His rock hard erection clung to his moist underwear, which was stained with clearish-pearl colored liquid.

Before he could get up however, he began recalling the dream that had produced this sorry state as the morning haze began to dissipate from his mind. He had dreamt of Sasuke. The raven haired boy had been laying on top of Naruto, both of them completely nude as they passionately kissed and lustily grinded against each other. Suddenly the dream Sasuke had pulled away from Naruto and grinned mischievously down at him, then began to plant kisses in a line down the dream Naruto’s body. On his cheek, neck, across his chest and stomach, until finally Sasuke had reached his cock. There too he planted a sloppy, wet kiss on the tip of his penis before engulfing Naruto’s member in his mouth, licking and sucking on it. That was when Naruto had awoken to find the sticky surprise in his pants.

_Gaaaaaaah!_ Naruto screamed out in his mind, having to force himself to not scream out loud. If he woke up Sakura she would definitely beat him up. _I can’t believe it, I can't believe it!_ He had never had a dream about Sasuke before, at least not one this vivid and incredible, not one like _that_ ! _Why’d I dream about something gross like that?! As if Sasuke would do that anyway. No wait, that's not the problem here! Why would I dream about Sasuke in the first place?!_ His penis still raged in his trousers, begging for some attention, uncaring of his dilemma about his sex dreams involving his rival. _Alright, I get it! Give me a minute,_ he consoled his member.

***

Naruto had hung his underwear on a nearby tree branch to dry after he had dunked it into the river, washing away his embarrassing nocturnal emission. He stood on the edge of the small river, working his erection in his hand. Yes, it was shameful and humiliating to be masturbating out in the open like this, but he was desperate for release, even in this atypical place.

“What are you doing?” Sasuke’s voice inquired from behind him without warning.

“Ah!” Naruto screamed out in fright, not expecting the unwelcome visitor interrupting his much needed personal time. He whirled around in unintended reaction, his stiff dick still gripped tightly in his hand and his pants around his legs, his compromising position plain as day for Sasuke to see. “S-S-S-Sasuke! What are you doing out here?” Naruto trembled, covering up his hard on with his hands in a small attempt at some modesty.

“I was on lookout duty, remember? ...Jeez, can’t you control yourself a little?” Sasuke scoffed, as if stumbling upon his teammate jerking off was no big deal. He was sitting on a nearby boulder, an expression of mixed bemusement and annoyance on his face.

“I can’t help it, I’m a growing boy! You understand, don't you?”

“...I do, but doing it out here is kind of messed up.”

“Screw you, bastard! It’s just so hard right now, I have to relive it or it’s going to be bothering me all day.”

Naruto turned around and went back to his task of masturbating. After a few moments though, he realized that Sasuke hadn’t walked away. He was still sitting on the rock, actually watching Naruto touch himself.

“Don’t sit there watching me, you creep!” Naruto hissed in embarrassment .

“You’re taking too long,” Sasuke growled at him. “We were supposed to switch shifts ten minutes ago!”

“It’s not that easy! The change in scenery is tough to get used to. Plus you’re staring at me, weirdo!”

Sasuke sighed, shaking his head in annoyance. He jumped off the big rock and marched over to Naruto, who stood there completely dumbfounded. He kept getting closer and closer. _Is he going to hit me? While I’m naked?!_ Surprisingly, Sasuke _didn’t_ hit him. Instead he did something even more unexpected: he reached out his arm and firmly grabbed a hold of Naruto’s penis.

“Wha-wha-what are you doing?!” Naruto exploded with shock. _His hand! His hand’s really touching my dick! What the hell?! What the hell’s going on here?!_

“Keep your voice down. You’re going to be useless if you’re like that, so just shut up let me help.” Sasuke stood next to Naruto and began pumping away at the blond’s cock, causing Naruto to let out an involuntary happy sigh.

_Whoa, it feels way better when it’s someone else's hand. Thank you so much Sasuke! You’re usually a jerk, but you saw I was in trouble and you helped me. I swear I’ll repay you!_

They stood side by side in silence as Sasuke stroked him off. As a fellow guy, Sasuke seemed to know just the right amount of tightness to grip with and how fast to move his hand. It felt so much better right now than whenever Naruto jerked himself off. A bead of sticky pre-cum dribbled out of his cock and down his rival’s hand, but Sasuke paid it no mind and continued on with his pleasuring, gliding his hand quickly across Naruto’s penis.

Curious to what kind of expression Sasuke had on his face Naruto snuck a glance to his side out of the corner of his eye. Sasuke was staring straight ahead not paying any attention to his task, as if he was calmly watching the scenery of the river as it flowed gently on by rather than jerking another guy off. Naruto looked down and noticed a tent jutting out of Sasuke’s trousers. _He’s hard too..._

_Should I…?_ Naruto thought warily. It was humiliating relying on Sasuke like this. It was an imbalance in their relationship that Naruto would not stand for. Naruto constantly sought to prove he was equal with Sasuke. If he just allowed this to occur he would fall even farther behind his rival. Not to be outdone in this contest of wills, Naruto worked up his courage and reached his hand out and began pulling the front of Sasuke's pants down.

“What the? Don’t touch me you useless moron!”

“Shut up, bastard! If you're going do it to me then we’re going to be equal! So just be quiet and enjoy it,” Naruto said forcefully. Oddly enough Sasuke had no reply to this. He allowed Naruto’s hand to pull down his trousers and firmly take his erection in his hand without any complaint. They stared ahead as they worked each other over, neither of them daring to look at the other. They stood as far apart as they could while still touching each other. Naruto decided to inch a tiny bit closer to Sasuke. Sasuke did so as well. They repeated this cautious process until the two of them were shoulder to shoulder, pressed against each other.

Naruto knit his brows together, shutting his eyes tight as Sasuke quickened his pace. Naruto replied in kind, speeding up his movements, the feeling of a cock other than his own throbbing needingly in his hand a strange and exciting sensation, causing his heart to beat erratically with amazement. The sounds of Sasuke’s short, shallow breaths accompanied by the occasional stifled moan filled his ears. Sasuke’s pre dribbled out onto his hand in a small river of needy excitement. Naruto had never noticed this before while playing with himself, but it was a remarkably different experience touching someone else's privates, and he noticed there was an incredible heat emanating off Sasuke’s privates. And behind that Naruto could clearly feel his partner’s heartbeat thumping away in his engorged member. He never realized you could feel a heartbeat _there_ of all places, but it was definitely noticeable, an oddly encouraging sensation as Sasuke’s cock pulsated lively in his grasp. In Naruto’s hand… was more than just the schlong of his rival; it was Sasuke’s pleasure, Sasuke’s warmth, Sasuke’s _life_ so carefully held in his palm as he gently worked his rival over. And in Sasuke’s hand was Naruto’s pleasure and warmth and life. This action was more than just entering each other's sexual satisfaction to the hand of the other, it was an odd form of bonding, a weird and intimately arousing experience between two boys who trusted and relied on each other far more than they could ever say. All the events that had happened so far during the Chunin Exams were proof enough of that, that their emotions were far more complicated than they understood. Despite their surroundings of untamed overgrown forest teeming with all sorts of creepy crawlies, at the moment Naruto felt so warm and comfortable–not to mention extremely turned on–that without thinking he leaned against Sasuke and rested his head on the taller boy’s shoulder. The situation between them was so arousing but also calm in a weird way, the whole world melting away until only the two of them existed any more. Just for the moment the conflict between them and the conflict raging _inside_ of them was calmed, and Naruto and Sasuke gave in to their feelings. Sasuke continued to rapidly work his cock, unconcerned with the boy affectionately resting his head on his shoulder, surprisingly not shifting to buck Naruto’s head resting affectionately on his shoulder. It wouldn’t be long now; Naruto could feel a heat bubbling inside him, a deep pleasure on the verge of eruption, desperate to get out. Soft moans turned into outright gasps of pleasure as they continued to stroke each other, their hands moving quicker and quicker as they both neared release.

“Gah! Sasuke… I’m gonna…” Naruto managed to get out through clenched teeth.

“Me too. Ngh!” Sasuke confirmed his own pending orgasm.

Naruto came first, his milky cum spurting out and falling into the water. Waves of pleasure enveloped him, but he was mindful to continue stroking Sasuke whose orgasm followed right behind on the tails of Naruto’s. One, two, three ropes of thick cum erupted from him and arced off into the air before plummeting into the river and washed downstream.

The two boys, hands still gripped on each others softening dicks, reveled in the aftermath of their shared act of passionate lust quietly, Naruto’s head still resting gently on Sasuke’s shoulder. After a few minutes of wordless enjoyment of the aftereffects of their mutual masturbation, Sasuke coughed uncomfortably then stepped away from Naruto and pulled up his pants. He leaned down and dunked his hands into the river, washing away the spurts of Naruto’s cum that had dripped onto him. Naruto stared down at his own hand, a sticky line of Sasuke’s seed spilled onto his hand as well. What an incredible thing they had just done. Not just physically, but emotionally too. It sounded very very strange, but somehow the cum on his hand made Naruto feel closer to Sasuke. It was as if Sasuke had allowed Naruto to see a little bit of his hidden side, like Sasuke had been open and willing to experience this pleasure together with him. Perhaps it was a sign that they had indeed grown a little closer emotionally, a little more trustful of each other.

“...Thanks,” Naruto awkwardly thanked Sasuke as he panted lightly in post orgasmic bliss, deeply grateful for Sasuke’s assistance in this highly embarrassing matter. He dipped his hands into the cool blue water, washing away the lingering globs of Sasuke’s sticky semen from off his hand.

“Yeah…” Sasuke replied noncommittally, showing neither anger or approval at what they had done together, shying away awkwardly from Naruto’s glance. “...I think your underwear is probably dry by now,” he muttered, nodding in the direction of Naruto’s boxers hanging on a tree branch.

***

Sakura was in tears, pleading with Sasuke to drop out of the Chunin Exams. She kept talking about a ‘mark’ but Naruto didn’t understand what was going on. Sasuke was gripping his shoulder and wincing in pain. He was being so harsh, almost yelling at Sakura. His eyes looked vicious, as if cursing Sakura and her meddlesome worries.

“I don’t care about the exams. I just want to know if I’m strong. To test myself against the strongest. And their all right here. I will never forgive you if you take that away from me.”

“You bastard!” Naruto interrupted his speech. “Stop trying to act all cool! Sakura's worried about you!”

“Naruto…” Sasuke said with a strange, fiercely passionate look in his eyes. “I also want to fight you.”

Naruto’s heart fluttered excitedly in his chest on hearing Sasuke’s sudden unexpected admission. He stood there completely dumbfounded, unknowing of what he should say, of how to respond. Sasuke only ever wanted to fight against the strongest of opponents, people he deemed worthy of facing off against. Did this mean he had really made it? Had Sasuke finally accepted Naruto as a rival worthy of his attention? Could Naruto at last move past the stage of being an annoyance to being someone Sasuke actually respected and thought of as an equal? Naruto didn’t know what these words truly meant or what was in store for them now, but he was deeply happy, despite his current inability to show it, a kind of warm glowing sensation in his belly. He had desired this kind of attention from Sasuke for so long he was completely baffled as what to do with his emotions. His heart was doing jumping jacks, half out of utter excitement, half out of pure nervousness. He swore he would continue to get stronger. That was probably the only way to know what exactly they felt about each other. Kakashi had said that people acted differently around those they liked. Perhaps this was a sign that Sasuke didn’t really dislike Naruto deep down after all. The thought made Naruto’s heart continue to race.


	4. As The Stars Shine Down On Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief moment of peace between the chaos and struggle of ninja life. An all too short occasion of quiet content between two solemn rivals on the precipice of the biggest, most important fights yet of their young lives. If only things could stay like this forever. If only time had stood still here at this moment. But it never does, ceaselessly marching forward, uncaring of individual's circumstances or wishes, towards an unavoidable confrontation and inescapable decisions that must be made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter than usual, but I hope you still find it good. Unlike the past two chapters, there's no smut (Booo! Hiss!) but the next will have PLENTY awkward sexings to be enjoyed, so I hope that makes up for it (and it will also be the longest chapter yet, which should be a good balance). 
> 
> ̶I̶'̶d̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶l̶y̶ ̶u̶p̶d̶a̶t̶e̶s̶,̶ but can't promise that I'll stick with that schedule due to life getting in the way, but even if I don't update in a while, don't despair! I won't abandon this story since it's a passion project for me and I want to see it through to the happy NaruSasuNaru end I envision. Just be patient and I'll try to upload as soon as I can. I hope everyone continues to stay with the story even if my updates are sorta spotty!
> 
> I also have to give a shout out to Angel_of_Darkness4444 and DJ_Polish for their comments last chapter which convinced me to include a scene with Shikamaru and his own view of Naruto and Sasuke's relationship. The focus will always be on them, but I might include other characters in cameos if I end up having good ideas.
> 
> Thanks so much for 1200+ hits and 50+ kudos by the way, it means a lot to me! I hope everyone continues reading and commenting =)

It was only two nights before the opening ceremonies of the long awaited Chunin Exam finals and the entire Hidden Leaf Village was swarmed with travelers who had come from far and wide to witness the festivities, the village bustling this evening with a rush of hectic activity like Naruto had never seen before. There was a noticeable tense buzz of excitement floating in the air as tourists visiting from all across the shinobi world and native citizens of the Leaf alike expectantly waited for the highly anticipated day of judgement to arrive at last. That sensation was like a kind of lively electrical pulse coursing through the densely packed particles of air, or a powerful field of static electricity suspended around the whole village which was conjured up from so many collective minds anxiously looking forward to the bouts now on the verge of commencing. It was an overtly palpable feeling that Naruto, as a soon-to-be participant in those very events the masses could barely contain their yearning to glimpse, could feel far more acutely and intensely than most other people around, the vigorous current of energy flowing right down to his very bones and zapping the kid wide awake with electrifying feelings of antsy unease.

Naruto noted that many of the bars and restaurants scattered throughout town were crammed full of patrons chatting merrily and having their shares of a wide variety of good food and drink offered by their generous hosts or were otherwise generally having an enjoyable time gossiping among themselves about recent events, both the influential national matters and the more mundane personal affairs being discussed and debated and whispered at length. A select few brave individuals were placing large wagers on the young contestants competing in the spectacular events to come, picking out which participants they believed would win and which would lose the high stakes matches with piles of crumpled up bills and shiny coins riding on the action, greedily calculating the odds they would return home far richer than before.

The fame and glory and recognition that came from victory or the agony and humiliation of defeat, for each and every one of the genin duking it out for the chance to become real shinobi and fulfill their individual goals, everything came down to these last handful of all-important battles. Just like for the people placing bets on their favorite champions hoping to earn a huge payoff from their hard won victories, the stakes were just as precariously high and the risks no less intimidating for the young shinobi competing in this ultimate test of skill, luck, and courage. Naruto knew that all too well himself; everything was riding on his performance in those battles just two short days from now, everything the young man wanted to gain and sought to accomplish in life depended on what occurred then. His future literally depended on whether or not he could seize victory against such tough foes who were just as determined as he was to win. To say that he was nervous would have been a massive understatement, it didn't begin to describe the kind of tumultuous, chaotic waterfall of diverse and powerful emotions that was crashing down on the genin at this critical moment.

Half of Naruto was amazed and electrified by the tidal wave of commotion and noise washing over the busy village tonight, soaking up the sea of entertainment and excitement with wide open eyes while he attempted to enjoy this bit of relative calm before the oncoming storm as best he could. But the other half of himself was especially restless about his upcoming match against the brutal prodigy Neji Hyuga that would be here before he even knew it, the ominous pressure of doubt that weighed down his shoulders and burdened his soul like a boulder sitting on his heart, keeping him from staying still in one place for too long-even more than usual for the hyperactive little knucklehead-lest he be reminded of that troublesome weight. Instead of a hearty bowl of ramen like he enjoyed so much, Naruto's poor stomach was currently filled with a flock of angry, anxious butterflies all fluttering around endlessly in circles, making the already nervous boy feel ever more wired and fidgety as the day wore on and the hours counting down to his crucial first fight grew ever smaller. It was still far too early to go to sleep yet-that was if Naruto even could fall asleep tonight with how apprehensive he was feeling as that fateful day grew closer on the horizon by the minute-but Naruto was also simply too jittery at the moment to focus clearly on doing anything else productive such as getting in just a bit more training before heading off to sleep. So considering that inability to concentrate, he instead opted to take a stroll throughout the village and have a gander at all the ongoing celebrations first hand, all the tough-looking ninja from distant lands walking about, the vast array mouth-watering foods simmering on grills, the colorful lights and balloons decorating the buildings; for the young man it was an eyeful of bright, overwhelming imagery that thankfully helped him ignore his worries for the moment.

Besides, even if Naruto had been feeling up to squeezing just a couple more hours of training in tonight before hitting the hay, that stupid pervy sage who was supposed to be training him had run off all of a sudden after telling the boy to take a break for the rest of the night and use this chance to relax and enjoy himself before the matches. It hadn't helped at all to hide his true, less-than-pure intentions that the big white-haired man had been giggling lecherously and counting out a thick wad of bills in his hands at the time!'Relax' my butt! Naruto snorted bitterly, recalling the old man's unmistakable gleeful perverted grin as he casually instructed his student to take the night off, Naruto knowing exactly what that irresponsible guy was up to all along. Naruto wasn't so easily fooled; he might have pretended it was for Naruto's sake, but the boy knew that old perv was somewhere out in the village flirting shamelessly with pretty girls half his age and drinking himself silly and broke simultaneously at this very moment, Naruto just knew it! Leave it to that dirty old man to blow off something important to go have a swell time acting like he was just a careless visitor enjoying the celebrations like any other and not the teacher of one of the tournament's contenders. Weren't there more important matters at hand right now than boobs and booze?! Oh well, Naruto sighed dishearteningly, reluctantly accepting that despite his annoyance and frustration with his new master, it was likely a moot point by now anyways; wherever Jiraiya the pervy sage was living it up at the moment, he was almost certainly way too drunk and horny to be of any good use to Naruto anymore. Just which one of them was supposed to be the adult, the responsible master between the two of them? It had only been a month since he had met the guy, but sometimes Naruto really wasn't sure.

As the boy aimlessly strolled around the village trying to calm his nerves and take in the many wonderful sights to help distract his mind away from unnerving thoughts, Naruto noticed that everywhere he looked there were lines of people running and twisting out in every possible direction: lines to get into waaaay too crowded eating establishments, lines leading into all sorts of stores that had stayed open much later than usual to serve the masses of out-of-towners seeking mementos from their stay in the Leaf, even despairingly long lines for the public restrooms; it was certainly a good thing Naruto didn't need to use the toilet right now, because it looked like he'd be waiting in line holding it for the next hour or two if he did! The streets were jam-packed with a multitude of different people all enjoying the sights and sounds and smells of the partying much like Naruto was; there were shinobi from many other nations distinguished by the kunai holsters wrapped around their legs and bearing polished headbands atop their brows proudly displaying their allegiance to all, a few hapless ornately dressed servants of feudal lords swiftly hunting down whatever kind of cuisine or other particular items their masters wished to have to sate their spoiled royal whims at that moment, salespeople standing at little temporary stalls set up all up and down the streets who were loudly hawking all manner of wares to any passerby, handfuls of simple curious civilians who had come into town to witness the spectacle and thrill of ninja battles in a safe and controlled setting, a number of mesmerized young children gawping excitedly at every little thing around them: the cool-looking ninja passing by or the colorful lights adorning each structure or whatever else caught their short attentions, and also a few proud civilian men boasting to their wives that they could easily take on a ninja in a fight-assurances which made Naruto laugh whenever he passed one of the 'tough guys'; even as a kid who was still just a genin he could still easily take on those self-assured dudes all by himself, nothin' to it.

All these types of people and many more were filling out the streets with boisterous chatter and made getting around the village quickly not such an easy thing to do considering how busy the streets were, not that Naruto had any specific destination in mind at the moment... All those people here having fun and enjoying the lead-up to the big day were the very same ones that Naruto would have to impress in just two days time if he ever wanted his dream to become a reality. It was nerve-racking, but strangely exhilarating as well at the same time; at last Naruto could prove once and for all to the world, to his team, to even himself that he was worthwhile, that he mattered! He had never failed when the stakes were high before, always finding someway to dig himself and his friends out of every trouble that befell them, and even if he was a bit uneasy at the moment, Naruto certainly didn't intend to start giving up now when the stakes and rewards were more important than ever!

“Naruto!” a familiar voice called out from behind him as the contemplative boy meandered from stall to stall peering at their many offered goods, slowly making his way down the street brimming with people laughing and hollering and cheering merrily. The person yelled to him as best they could over the dull roar of dozens of conversations going on all at once, but there was just too much chaotic noise blasting into Naruto's ears to know exactly who it was with just one call.

Naruto whirled around upon hearing that unidentified someone trying to get his attention, intently searching through the dozens of faces behind him to see if he recognized any of them before suddenly spotting his teammate Sakura methodically pushing her way through the crowds towards him, the girl carefully maneuvering through the clusters of people standing here and there, apologizing when she inadvertently bumped into someone-which happened often in this busy stretch of town. Tagging along just behind her and looking very out of place in the swarm of happy people was Sasuke, who was wearing an even more displeased expression today than he usually did if one could believe such a thing was possible.

“Hey, Sakura. What’s up?” Naruto asked casually with a simple nod of greeting once she had squeezed her way through the heavy crowds to reach him.

“There you are. Don’t ‘what’s up’ me, we've been looking for you,” she irritatedly reacted to his blasé attitude, her bad mood perhaps magnified with all the heat and pressure created from so many bodies cluttered together at once around them. “We haven’t all been together in so long because you guys were busy with your training, I thought you’d be more excited to see us,” Sakura continued, sounding almost hurt at his atypically underwhelming response. It had been almost a whole month since Team 7 had last gathered together, so she had expected Naruto to be much more... energetic considering the circumstances. Sakura couldn't help but think he seemed a little off tonight, distracted and drained somehow, his reactions dulled and uncharacteristic; he hadn't even smiled when he had seen her.

“Ah, sorry Sakura!” Naruto quickly apologized after noticing Sakura's concerned face, putting on a cheerier attitude for her benefit and flashing one of his trademark toothy grins, something more similar to his typical character. Whether his sudden change in demeanor was real and he actually did feel better because his allies were there now or if it was just a fake wall put up to hide his worries and doubts from them was anyone's guess, though. “I just have a lot of things on my mind right now,” he hastily explained away his unusually passive response to her presence; usually he was more than eager to interact with her, hoping she would finally give him a chance and go out with him.

“Somehow I find that hard to believe,” Sasuke sarcastically interjected, purposely muttering his insult loud enough for them all to hear over the buzzing drone of the multiple conversations within earshot.

“You shut up!” Naruto snapped back rapidly, pointing at Sasuke threateningly and giving him an irritated glare, a threat the black-haired boy only scoffed at before leaning sideways in disgust as a train of people brushed by him, trying his best to avoid physical contact with anyone around, which was an almost impossible task in this situation. Just because that guy was having a bad time didn't mean he had to take it out on Naruto! What a jerk!

Sakura let out a frustrated sigh, shaking her head in disapproval at her two companions' bitterness towards each other even on this grand occasion. She hadn't expected smiles and hugs and hearty congratulations between them-she wasn't an idiot after all-but she had initially foreseen them acting just a little bit better towards each other considering how hard they both had worked to get here, how much they surely had grown to respect the other's will and determination by now, even if they didn't say so aloud. Oh, how foolish she had been.

“Jeez, can’t you guys ever get along? You’re both in the Chunin Exams, you should be celebrating your hard work, not arguing,” Sakura scolded her stubborn friends. Leave it to these two to continue their feud as usual like nothing else was going on in the world. But Sakura quickly realized that Sasuke and Naruto were probably still acting macho as ever exactly because of the situation, trying not to show weakness before the other guy, in the event that he might very soon shift from an ally-no matter how acrimonious that relationship was-to a full-blown opponent, an obstacle to be defeated and overcome. This was probably their way of keeping calm under pressure, maintaining the situation with as much normality as possible. Even for those two proud, immovably stubborn guys, the endlessly playful and occasionally thickheaded Naruto, and the perpetually collected and mostly distant Sasuke, the reality must have been frightening, fighting in such important all-out struggles in front of so many people... potentially against someone they both trusted the most to support them and watch their back. In those black and white terms, Sakura could easily see how difficult this probably was for both of them, and why they would want to keep things as level and typical as possible; it was a defense mechanism of sorts, allowing them to admit their feelings without showing weakness or openly admitting how they were holding up under the pressure. Sakura couldn't help but think that guys were so annoyingly aversive sometimes when it came to their feelings-ESPECIALLY these two dorks-or why they couldn't ever just come out and say what they wanted to say and had to put up front all the time, but she had long since learned how to deal with her friend's combative attitudes and avoidance of their true emotions effectively by now, even if their actions were still annoying and grated on her nerves. So let them yell and insult just as long as it made them feel better, more secure and safe at such a vital time. ...Sometimes I don't ever think I'll understand boys, Sakura swore to herself as she watched Naruto childishly stick his tongue out at Sasuke, who rolled his eyes at the gesture and muttered 'loser' under his breath.

"Anyways!" Sakura swiftly intervened and acted as peacemaker, diffusing the situation before the actions meant to test each other's resolve and courage ended up turning into a real fight. You never really knew with these two when one would break out, best to stop it in its tracks before things got out of control. "As I was saying, I think we should do something together, the three of us. You know, something to celebrate how hard you guys have worked."

“I could celebrate easier at home,” Sasuke stated grumpily, crossing his arms and huffing in agitation at his bad luck of being caught by Sakura while he was coming home from a long day of training with Kakashi. Looking at him standing there scowling away, Naruto believed that Sasuke did indeed look very uncomfortable in these large crowds, his foul mood–or fouler than normal at least–was an obvious sign of his discontent and distress. If someone accidentally bumped into Sasuke, Naruto wouldn’t have been surprised at all if he ended up watching Sasuke beat them up in repayment for the mild inconvenience they had shown him. Well, Sasuke definitely wasn’t what you would consider a ‘people person’ anyways, always content to be the lone wolf doing things his own way on his own time, so his foul attitude wasn't that much of a surprise.

“Celebrate? All of us together?” Naruto questioned Sakura's unusual outpouring of sentimentality with a curious expression. By now Team 7 had of course grown to trust and rely on each other-minus the occasional flare up of hostilities between the two hot headed boys-the young shinobi having previously gotten over most of the issues that they had had with each other initially. But even so, they didn't really do tender, mushy stuff together. Very rarely did the three genin get sentimental about their partnership. After all the experiences they had had together, every hard fought victory and struggle to keep each other alive from the Land of Waves to the Forest of Death, the three kids had learned to work well together and functioned efficiently as a squad now-or about as well as one could expect with three relentlessly independent, passionate personalities constantly pushing back and forth against each other-but they still lacked much distinct emotional attachment to one another-putting aside Sakura's infatuation with Sasuke that always made Naruto feel nauseous, of course. Teamwork and cooperation? Yes. Respect and communication? On some days perhaps, others not so much. But outright affection and real genuine caring about each other? The trio hadn't quite hit that level just yet, but given more time, maybe someday they would...

Which was why Naruto thought it was so weird that Sakura would want to experience something like that, just a moment to themselves for emotion's sake. But on the other hand, a real team bonding experience did actually sound pretty interesting. Another new experience for the boy who had only just a few months ago left the village for the first time and establish real, tangible connections of faith and reliance with other people. Establishing that level of emotional link with Sakura didn't sound so bad. ...And Sasuke... Well, Sasuke was Sasuke, and their relationship was what it was, for better or worse. Naruto wouldn't have necessarily objected to having a more... honest and frank bond with Sasuke if given the chance... But he was just too frustrating to deal with for that, always majorly pissing Naruto off with his superior attitude and harsh ways, so that wasn't likely to happen. Things like trust and respect, let alone any real sort of emotional connection, was difficult to come by between them. Maybe someday that would change, but for now, things were the way they were.

“Yeah, I thought it would be nice to spend some time together as a team for once,” Sakura explained, looking expectantly at Naruto as if hoping he would join in and agree with her sentiments, which would force Sasuke to cease his dissenting against their united front.

“Sakura made me come along and wouldn’t take no for an answer. She’s been dragging me around town forever,” Sasuke moped, giving Naruto a silent miserable look of desperation that could only have been a warning for him to escape from Sakura's clutches now while he still could.

“Hey, wait a second! Why did you go to Sasuke first?!” Naruto shouted after hearing this, brushing aside Sasuke's warning-or likely not even understanding its meaning at all in the first place-and instead chose to be offended at being second in line to his sworn rival. “Are you two on a date?!” he gasped in shock, his eyes opening wide with fear and disbelief as he recoiled in terror. Had they finally become a pair? Had Naruto missed out on his chance to persuade Sakura?!

“W-well, kinda-” Sakura started to say, her face turning just as pink as her hair as she was flooded with adolescent embarrassment.

“Not at all,” Sasuke brusquely interrupted her. “I’d say it’s more of a hostage situation, actually,” he informed Naruto. For most people that would have been considered a joke, but Sasuke was completely deadpan in his delivery, trampling all over Sakura's hopes.

Sakura hung her head in embarrassment and disappointment as Sasuke brushed her feelings for him off yet again, her face still burning with heat at the thought of a possible but fictional date with her crush. Unfortunately for her, Sasuke was too much of a jerk to offer anything like that.

“You bastard! You don’t have to be so mean!” Naruto yelled at hearing Sasuke’s careless words directed towards Sakura. “Hey, Sakura, I'd be more than happy to go on a date with you!” Naruto eagerly inserted himself into the opportunity. But more than trying to support her or defend her from Sasuke’s rudeness, it was more that Naruto was pleading with his childhood crush to finally give him a chance.

“No thanks, Naruto. I’m not interested in a date with you at all,” she blatantly told him off with a big, warm smile that belied her words that were as cold as ice, chilling Naruto to the bone with their brisk intensity like a bitter arctic wind.

“Awww, you’re so mean, Sakura,” Naruto whined in frustration. Now he was the one who was hanging his head in disappointment.

“Anyways,” Sakura moved on, ignoring Naruto’s not all that uncommon inability to deal with her constant spate of rejections, “Sasuke and I were looking around at the restaurants for a while. I thought it might be fun for us to grab something to eat together to celebrate-”

“ICHIRAKU!” Naruto suddenly interrupted her, shouting merrily and quickly springing up from his very brief bout with depression resulting from Sakura’s rejection, his overly boisterous excitement drawing a number of curious or annoyed stares from the many people on the street tonight. The thought of his favorite restaurant in the whole wide world was more than enough to break his will and redirect his attention from his affections for the pink-haired girl. A good bowl of steamy ramen would certainly do wonders to make him feel better right about now, fill his belly and make those obnoxious damn butterflies sit still for a while.

Jeez, he’s just like a yappy little dog. Always bouncing around so excited and carefree, Sasuke thought disparagingly as he watched Naruto jump in the air so happily at the simple mention of food, snorting a little to himself in amusement at his very apt comparison.

“Let me finish, you numbskull!” Sakura shouted back at him, raising her fist at him as a threat and causing Naruto to reactively flinch and shield his head with his hands. This exercise seemed to happen often enough that he now instinctively knew when Sakura's short fuse would end and her patience with his tomfoolery ceased, learning when to knock his impish ways off lest he be pummeled by Sakura for the umpteenth time. Sasuke wasn't sure about an old dog, but it seemed you could at least teach a dumb dog a new trick.

“I was going to say that’s what I originally had planned, but with all the people from out of town staying around here all the restaurants are completely full. Even Ichiraku has a crazy long line outside,” she explained with a dissatisfied shrug.

“Noooooo!” Naruto moaned in horror, utterly devastated at the grim news. He had gotten his hopes up only for them to be trashed to completely.

“Oh, don’t be such a baby! You can go to Ichiraku anytime,” Sakura frowned and chastised him. Here she was being nice and trying to have some personal time with her teammates and all that idiot could think of was his stomach! And the other one only wanted to run away! “Help me think of what to do instead you guys.”

“Do I have to?” Sasuke asked, basically pleading with her to let him go home. How sad for him that he always got himself wrapped up in Sakura and Naruto's whims.

“Of course! You’re part of Team 7 too, Sasuke, so don't try to get out of this! We haven’t all been together for a while, if we don’t spend some quality time together we’ll forget each other's faces!” Sakura exclaimed exaggeratedly, causing Sasuke to groan in bitter annoyance that he had to participate as well. He supposed teamwork was fine and all, but this cheesy emotional stuff and team building exercise junk was not an area of discussion he was fond of.

“Hey guys, I think I have an idea,” Naruto proposed out of the blue, halting Sakura's desire to drag him along and Sasuke's competing will to flee to recluse.

***

Shikamaru Nara sighed wearily at the maddening sight before him, leaning sideways to take a peek at all the people in line ahead of him. What a depressing sight it was. By his count there were still about 20 or so more patrons lined-up waiting impatiently to get into the jam-packed restaurant before he and his friends would even have a chance of getting in. Who knew just how much longer they would have to continue frittering away time pointlessly until they could at last be served their meal. This was such a drag!

Everywhere in the village there were crowds, crowds, crowds! Shikamaru hated crowds. Tons of people just made everything a total drag. It took longer to get places, the stores ran out of supplies faster, you could never get a seat at any of the restaurants, and it was hot and noisy and frustrating with so many bodies crammed into one place. Why did everyone have to make such a big deal about the Chunin Exams anyway? He preferred someplace quiet he could take a nap or watch the clouds float carelessly on by to this obnoxious commotion over something like the Chunin Exams. Sometimes Shikamaru thought that being a ninja was more of a hassle than it was worth, but suddenly finding a new career now at this juncture would have been even more problematic, so here he stayed despite his complaints. He only wished that his duties didn't include waiting in lines. His teammates Ino and Choji had good intentions bringing him out to celebrate his upcoming debut in the Exam finals, and Shikamaru certainly appreciated their feelings, but he would have vastly preferred staying in tonight and not having to deal with all this nonsense, just a quiet laid back get together between the three of them. The pair seemed to be having a much better time looking at the ninja tools and clothing and food being sold by vendors at the stalls lining the roads than he was anyways. Well, at the very least standing still in line required less effort than squeezing through shouting masses of people, so Shikamaru supposed this was a small step up in a bleak, defeated sort of view.

But as bad as standing here pointlessly for who only knew how much longer was, the alternative was even worse. Just behind him came a chorus of loud grumblings and frustrated groans, some of them coming from his teammate Choji's ravenous stomach, and others coming from the chubby boy's frustrated mouth as he impatiently danced in place waiting for the line to move. As his best friend for years now, Shikamaru knew Choji Akimichi pretty well. Personality wise, he was usually somewhat on the shy and reserved side-which contrasted with his outwards appearance-and had an annoying lack of confidence in himself that bothered Shikamaru from time to time, but he was also a good, loyal friend with a kind heart. However, when Choji got hungry he often got grumpy, and when he went without for too long grumpy eventually turned into scary! The only thing that set Choji off more than an empty belly and hunger pangs was when someone called him the 'F' word. No, not that 'F' word, the other one that ended with -at. So as reluctant as Shikamaru was to waste his time standing in line for access to an already overcrowded and noisy restaurant, he wasn't about to tempt fate and try to persuade the famished Choji to give up when he was really craving a hearty meal something fierce. Shikamaru may have been lazy, but he wasn't stupid, and he certainly wasn't brave enough to tempt that outcome. Shikamaru had originally planned out a strategy to quickly flee from the line and run home, but that sounded like a lot of work for nothing, and then a thunderous, angry rumbling came from Choji's stomach, causing the boy to growl in hungry frustration and thus the cowardly Shikamaru to dispose of that plan posthaste. He wasn't interested in being used for target practice for Choji's Expansion Jutsu and getting squashed like a bug by giant arms if he dared abandon his friend at this moment. Better to leave that fate to a braver, more foolhardy ninja than him instead, considering the alternatives Shikamaru was comfortable here in line, thank you very much.

Speaking of foolhardy ninja, the most recklessly gallant, audaciously daring young ninja Shikamaru had ever had the pleasure-or displeasure, he wasn't so sure which sometimes-of knowing had just entered the scene at that very moment, coming on stage as if Shikamaru's thoughts had been his cue for arrival. For better or worse, Naruto Uzumaki was certainly a one of a kind guy.

"I'm going to win the whole tournament, believe it!" Naruto shouted confidently as he and his two squad mates pushed through the throngs of people off to some unknown destination, his nasally voice carrying through the crowds and somehow echoing over the greater swath of voices. He was about as subtle as a fireworks show. Where did he get the energy to be so upbeat all the time? Naruto expended more effort in an hour than Shikamaru did on a whole typical day, oozing excess spirit and energy from his very pores.

"The only thing you could ever win is a 'Loudest, Dumbest Loser' contest. ...Although I'm not sure you could even win that," the dour, black-haired companion trailing just behind him snapped back at Naruto's excited display. Shikamaru wasn't sure if the statement was supposed to be a cutting remark or a men-spirited joke, but either way Naruto didn't take it well.

"What did you say?! Let's so, right now! I'll kick your ass into next week, pal!" Naruto shouted out even louder, a definite tone of irritation noticeable in his voice.

"Shut up, you're making a scene, loser," the black-haired guy, Sasuke, tries to hush the ever vibrant Naruto. Shikamaru knew it wouldn't work though, from personal experience; once Naruto got going he was like a rampaging bull, single minded and relentless. "Just where the hell are we going, anyway?" Sasuke demanded impatiently, seemingly fed up with annoying crowds and even more annoying blond losers. Behind them a girl the same age had her face buried in her hands, probably in shame and embarrassment at her other two teammates being so public with their arguments, basically airing their short tempers for all to see like it was dirty laundry, like they were saying 'Hey come look at our dysfunctional team!' to any who wanted to watch the drama play out. Shikamaru couldn't help but feel a little sympathy and kinship for Sakura Haruno at the moment; he too was often dragged into situations he'd rather stay out of by his much more impassioned friends, this standing in line like until he died being a good example of that.

"Just shut up and follow me, would ya? You'll know when we get there, jerk," Naruto assured Sasuke, acting as leader of the pack as he so often attempted, always without success. Shikamaru remembered from their days back in school that Sasuke's will was just as great at Naruto's immovable as the stone faces of the Hokage carved into the mountain looking down on the village. You could no more make one of them budge than you could push an entire mountain with your bare hands.

"Those two sure are getting along well these days," Shikamaru remarked with a tired sigh and a half-smile. Shikamaru didn't envy their relationship one bit, but he did have to admit they made a good pair of teammates in a weird sort of way, fiery and determined to a fault. You could certainly do worse than having two people like that on a team, even if it was likely always loud and draining. The fact that both of them had made it to the exams was proof enough that SOMETHING they were doing was working. Maybe fighting against each other actually made them stronger. That was indeed an interesting hypothesis; did they actually end up pushing each other to do better? Shikamaru wasn't going to investigate further-getting between Naruto and Sasuke was like sticking your head into a tiger's cage at the zoo foolishly expecting to come out alright-but it was interesting enough that he made a small mental note to watch their progress from now on, how they grey from here. Naruto especially had changed enormously since his days at the Academy, far stronger and skilled than previously, so it was definately something worth looking into.

"Huh? What the heck are you talking about?" Choji questioned in confusion from behind him, noting the lack of sarcasm in his friend's voice. "Those guys hate each other, Shikamaru," he assured his pony-tailed friend, looking at Shikamaru like he had lost his mind.

"Yeah, they get along even worse than me and Billboard Brow Sakura!" Ino exclaimed, agreeing with her chubby teammate and bringing up her own rivalry with a former friend.

Shikamaru looked between his teammates in disbelief. How could they not see what he saw? Was he really the only one who noticed? Yeah,Naruto and Sasuke bickered and fought like cats and dogs, but you didn't do that with someone you hated. Not in the way they did at least. If you truly, deeply hated someone you ignored them. You blotted them out from existence and pretended they weren't there. That wasn't what Shikamaru saw though; they acknowledged each others existences and worth, pressing against each other like two opposing forces of gravity, challenging each other as if, consciously or not, fighting for recognition. Naruto trailed after Sasuke like a lost puppy, always seeking to be as good as him, demanding his attention through hard work and diligence. One time Shikamaru remembered that Sasuke had been called on by Iruka-sensei to display his shuriken technique, which Shikamaru freely admitted was the best of their class. As Sasuke expertly flung the metal stars hitting a bullseye every time, he recalled looking over at Naruto who was standing next to hm and not hatred or disgust at his rival being picked to show off his skills, but pure jealousy burning in his cerulean eyes. Jealousy and... perhaps a little bit of admiration too. Later that evening Shikamaru had stumbled upon Naruto doing his own shuriken practice at the playground near the school, attempting to imitate Sasuke's form precisely. That wasn't hate.

That's exactly what I'm saying, Shikamaru tried to convince her, but didn't bother speaking his words aloud, knowing it wouldn't work to persuade Ino anyways. No matter how much you like to say so, I know you don't really hate Sakura deep down, Ino. I think it's the same with those two. Ah, whatever it would be too much of a pain to explain, I'll just drop it. Ino hid her feelings about the matter, flinging insults at Sakura who retaliated in kind, but Shikamaru knew that her rivalry was much more emotionally complicated that she let on, that she had struggled with the decision to help Sakura in the Forest of Death when she had been under attack by three very powerful ninja. Ino was many things, feisty, stubborn, even a bit shallow when it came to guys, but she wasn't someone who hated easily. Though he admittedly didn't know her well, Shikamaru believed that Sakura was much the same as well. There was more there than what most people saw.

"I was joking you guys," Shikamaru responded deadpan, unilaterally deciding that voicing his thoughts would be way too much of a drag. It wasn't like they would agree with him anyways.

"Shikamaru you're too serious all the time for anyone to find you funny. You should leave the class clown act to Naruto," Choji remarked and noted Naruto's reputation as a goof and prankster, placing his hand on his pal's shoulder in a sympathetic gesture as if he believed he was crushing his friend's secret dream of being a comedian and was sorry to deliver the bad news.

"No arguments here," Shikamaru sighed wearily with a wry smile back at Choji in agreement, pretending not to be devastated by the 'horrible news'. Being a funnyman is way too much effort for me anyways. Thinking up jokes and pranks like Naruto did? Too much work for too little gain. The little fool could have domain all to himself, Shikamaru was going to stick with cloud watching.

His thoughts returning to Team 7 and their bizzareness, there was also the other one, Sasuke. It took two to tango, or so the saying went, and Naruto's rivalry was certainly not one sided, at least from Shikamaru's point of view. If speaking frankly, Shikamaru would honestly have to say that he didn't like Sasuke Uchiha all that much. In Shikamaru's own humble opinion the guy was self-centered to the max, needlessly aggressive and confrontational, and kind of a jerk towards everyone without any exceptions. Actually maybe Naruto was a small expect in Sasuke's book, Shikamaru didn't know for sure because of his limited interaction with him. Sasuke ignored everyone, not even pretending interest in other people's matters or thoughts. But not with Naruto. Sasuke always seemed up to fighting with Naruto, yelling at Naruto, calling Naruto names. Okay, yes, that was pretty messed up, not an indicator of friendship by any means, but it WAS abnormal. It didn't fit into Sasuke's other reactions; instead of brushing Naruto off and ignoring him, Sasuke pushed back against him, returning Naruto's negative attention dealt in challenges and squabbles instead of negating it. It was subtle, but it was there. In any case, Shikamaru had never spoken his impression of Sasuke out loud before since the ways other people acted really was none of his concern, and besides that he also didn't want to get drawn into some complicated feud that would only be a big hassle in the end; making enemies with the top ranked kid in the Academy would be a serious, not to mention potentially painful, drag. Nonetheless, even if he didn't particularly like the guy, Shikamaru did at least respect Sasuke's strength and intelligence despite his foul attitude. He was, if nothing else, a fellow Leaf ninja, a comrade. ...And an ass to be sure.

Which was exactly why he could never figure out why Naruto did like Sasuke. ...Well, maybe 'like' was the wrong word. It was more along the lines of... a kind of infatuation mixed with jealousy or something? Even as smart as he was, Shikamaru had never been able to effectively pin down what words to use when it came to those two exhausting guys and their unidentified relationship of rivalry and respect. That kind of thing was completely beyond his realm of knowledge. Even so, he could obviously see that there was a lot more to their interactions than other people understood, that there was a hidden layer of subtext between the two, everything they did or said carried a certain unspoken weight, so many hidden meanings gone stubbornly silent. So why couldn't anyone else pick up on it? Why was Shikamaru the only one-to his knowledge-that understood there was a deeper meaning to their squabbling?

Oh well, it's none of my business, Shikamaru relented with a tired shrug as the line moved up just a tad and he and his friends moved slightly closer to the looming delight of dinner. He had no intentions of getting involved in other people's personal affairs, regardless of the circumstances, and he was highly doubtful anyone would willingly come looking for his opinion of friendships and relationships in any matter. Besides, getting involved with other people's private lives would be such a drag! He had no desire of getting in between Naruto and Sasuke's disputes in particular; intervening between two wild, endlessly emotional and fired-up guys like them was dangerous for your health. Who knew what could happen, he might even loose an arm or two trying! Let them be the ones to rip each other's arms off in their exhausting feud, Shikamaru intended to steer clear of that mess and keep his body parts all together as long as he could.

***

“This was your idea, loser?” Sasuke asked incredulously, openly questioning Naruto’s judgment when it came to spending time together. He was such a simple minded guy with such a simple minded suggestion, Sasuke shouldn't have been surprised, yet somehow he still was. ...It wasn't exactly a horrible idea even if it did seem like a big pointless waste of time to him, it was only that Sasuke had been expecting something not quite so... subdued and mellow. An eating contest or a race around the village, that fit the loser much better. For Naruto, this suggestion seemed radically out of character.

“Hey, do you have a better idea on what to do?!” Naruto fumed, offended at Sasuke’s insinuation that his idea was a bad one.

“Naruto’s right for once,” Sakura chimed in with her own opinion. “With all the people in the village now, there’s not really much we can do. Everywhere worth going is either too busy or closed right now. This isn't so bad anyways,” she insisted, also surprised herself at Naruto's idea to spend time together, but enjoying the suggestion nonetheless. It seemed so... unlike him.

The three genin of Team 7 sat together in a field of lush grass outside the village near the training grounds, all of the young ninja staring up at the beautiful night sky as thousands of little sparks of light shined down on the companions. The large, grassy clearing was a perfect place to quietly watch the stars, open and far enough from the trees that they wouldn't obstruct the view with their leafy branches. Out here away from the town the obnoxious, incessant buzzing noise of the dozens of conversations filling the busy village like deafening cicadas in the sultry summer evening was just a faint, far off hum, the night sounds out here instead dominated by colonies of crickets chirping their music at each other like competing orchestras and stray owls hooting in the nearby forest own the prowl for prey to feast on. A crisp night breeze blew through the trees, causing the leaves to gently rustle and sway under its guidance and leaving a chill in the air. An occasional moth or two fluttered about enjoying the respite from the hot afternoon, drifting about aimlessly like leaves caught in an updraft. Thankfully, though, the mosquitoes weren't out with their winged brethren enjoying the nightly harvest of blood, their disappearance a welcome addition to the scene. All in all, it was a mild, enjoyable night, perfect to spend looking reverently up at the stars with friends.

This place held a special significance for Naruto. For all of them, really. This clearing, with those three logs standing upright and the memorial to the fallen heroes of the Leaf Village, it was a place filled with emotions. This was where they had first become Team 7, where they tried so hard to get those bells from Kakashi-sensei, where they first learned how important their teamwork was to being a ninja. Naruto was overcome with a hazy sense of nostalgia coming here again; it seemed so long ago that he had become a genin, so many events happening during those months to continuously push him forward along his path, so many new things he had learned and experienced and accomplished. He felt so much stronger now than he had been back then. So much… happier. Back then he had only had Iruka-sensei in his life to trust and rely on and talk to, but now he had gained Kakashi-sensei and Sakura, and even Sasuke too when he wasn’t busy being an ass. Yeah, maybe even Sasuke too, in his own weird way, even if just a tiny bit, now had some affection for Naruto buried deep down. The boy finally felt like he had a real life, a normal life just like everyone else. Naruto was more than just the kid that everyone hated and avoided. Now he had people who cared about him.

The inky sky was spread out like a vast empty sea above the three young ninja, the only things showing up against that blackness was the light of the many clusters of stars, all shining like tiny lighthouses in the darkness, all showing off their bright bulbs amidst an ocean of pitch black night. A thousand pinholes of light were all twinkling in the dark sky down on the three comrades. Accompanying these fireflies was the big, beautiful ivory moon, the orb perfectly full and circle tonight, shining its haunting beams down on the earth below.

Naruto flopped back into the soft grass, placing his hands behind his head to cushion it so his elbows were poking out. He was thoroughly enjoying this peaceful moment to take his mind off of his upcoming match against the brutal and cold Neji Hyuga, a boy so harsh he actually made Sasuke look like a cheery, mellow guy in comparison. Naruto had spent many hours since the conclusion of the preliminary rounds endlessly worrying about how he would fare since he had found out who his opponent would be a month ago, leaving him tired and frustrated, so to be able to just relax for a moment actually was a nice change of pace, the calm before the storm as it were. Sakura and Sasuke followed his lead, both of them also laying back in the grass and watching the vast cosmos above them with its multitude of luminous lights seemingly dancing as they flickered on. The sky lay above them smooth and flawless as a blanket of black velvet stretched out flat.

“It’s really pretty,” Sakura mumbled absentmindedly to no one in particular. The stars looked like glistening diamonds on this remarkably clear night, not a cloud in sight to spoil the majesty of the far off lights. Naruto and Sasuke were both unusually quiet right now, neither of them bothering to bicker and argue like they always did, perhaps calmed by the wondrous sight high above their heads. The three comrades stared silently at the magnificent glimmering lights above, each so far off and distant yet still beautiful and meaningful in its own way.

A sudden silver streak ran across the night sky like a thrown kunai knife, the bright light quickly bolting across the darkness of space and vanishing from view just as quickly as it had come. It continued on to some unknown destination, only temporarily gracing these three shinobi with its remarkable yet fleeting brilliance.

“Ah! A shooting star!” Naruto exclaimed in wonder, shutting his eyes tightly after sighting the traveling star so he could make a wish on the wonderous but brief sight as it streamed across his vision and rapidly blinked out of existence.

“What did you wish for?” Sakura asked him after a moment of silence.

“If I tell you then it won’t come true,” Naruto adamantly refused to divulge his secret wish, even to Sakura, the object of his one-sided affections.

“He probably just wished for something stupid like a mountain of ramen anyways,” Sasuke scoffed. Idiots always had such simplistic wishes in life, no ambition or real desires.

“No I didn’t!” Naruto yelled back, his voice echoing throughout the otherwise quiet forest. Naruto shot up from his prone position and glared down at Sasuke lying next to him. “I wished to become Hokage! ...Ah crap, I told!” he shouted worriedly after a second, realizing all too late that he had spilled his secret and now his desire wouldn’t come true. What a sad waste of a wish!

“That was never going to come true anyways,” Sasuke assured him. “If you ask me, I think you’d be better suited to becoming the Baka-kage,” Sasuke smirked, offering his teammate another career path.

Baka-kage, he said! 'Idiot Shadow' instead of the proper title Hokage, meaning 'Fire Shadow'. This guy was such an unbelievable bastard sometimes. Insulting him was one thing, certainly nothing out of the usual and something Naruto had grown accustomed to when it came to dealing with Sasuke, but stepping on his dream was just too much! “Yes it will! I will definitely become Hokage someday! I’ll show you, Sasuke!” he swore, a fiercely determined look in his eyes as he continued to glare down at Sasuke. “When I’m Hokage… everyone will have to respect me. No one will make fun of me anymore… No one will tell me they hate me and avoid me anymore. ‘Cuz I’ll protect the whole village and everyone will have to admit they were wrong about me and realize how strong I am. Even you, Sasuke,” he vowed, giving Sasuke a defiant, almost eerie look because of how intense his face looked under the gentle moonbeams.

Both of Naruto’s teammates were hushed by the unexpectedly personal and open glimpse of his dream. Both of them knew how deep-seated his desire for acknowledgement was. They had learned at least that much over the time they had all been together. Sasuke and Sakura both understood how important that dream was to Naruto. Everything he did, all the effort he exerted was for that single goal. But it was rare for him to show his motives in such plain and emotional words, making a fresh impact on Sasuke and Sakura of just how badly Naruto wished for his life to change.

"I will... I will become Hokage," Naruto again swore to his teammates, his voice trembling with poorly contained emotion leaking through. One day he would have more than this. He would have friends who cared about him, he would be able to walk down the street without people calling him horrible names, he would command respect and admiration. He would prove Neji's fatalistic nihilism to be bullshit in two days time. Naruto would struggle and fight and never give up on trying to build a better life for himself, a life where he could discard the hate and sadness and loneliness and just be happy for a change. And no one on the entire planet was going to stop him from fighting for that goal, not Neji, not Sasuke, not anyone.

As Naruto went on resolutely describing his dream of becoming Hokage as he stared at Sasuke unwaveringly, Sasuke noticed the blond boy’s hands were balled tightly into fists, trembling in an odd mix of anger and sheer insurmountable determination. His cerulean eyes burned with a kind of passionate fire that could only be called admirable, a will that couldn't be quashed. But there was also... something akin to hurt in there, hidden away from him especially considering their relationship, but something that Sasuke could plainly see there, that wasn't secret to him at all. Hurt that Sasuke had questioned his goal, Naruto's very reason for existence, the thing that he had struggled night and day for. It was then that Sasuke suddenly realized he had gone too far in his insults, even for their competitive relationship built on such trash talk and rudeness. Demeaning Naruto’s dream… that had been too much of him. Slapping an insult on a man was one thing, but mocking his dreams and beliefs was another thing entirely, an almost unforgivable slight against his pride and honor and self-respect. Sasuke wouldn't stand for it if someone did such to him, told him to turn away from avenging his family, so why would Naruto be any different? Even if most of the time Naruto was a hyperactive, thick headed loser who had his head in the clouds, Sasuke knew that what he had said then was far more cruel than even his worst words under normal circumstances. And he knew he had been wrong; Naruto might be an idiot, but he had far more ambition than most people Sasuke had known, universally devoted to his goals. As Naruto stared him straight in the eyes Sasuke noticed there was a wildfire burning in his eyes, the kind of scorching blaze Naruto got from time to time that Sasuke was secretly jealous of. Even his own massive determination paled in comparison when placed side by side with Naruto’s. Deep down that was something Sasuke actually respected about Naruto. He never gave up. He was stubborn beyond belief, and not exactly in a bad way. It was what made Naruto, Naruto.

“Well, go ahead and try then. Fat chance on that though. But if you do actually make it I guess I might even congratulate you. Maybe,” Sasuke said with a shrug, this perhaps being his way of apologizing for his overly stern rebuke of his comrade. Never a straight answer with him.

“...And when I’m Hokage you’ll be my wife, Sakura,” Naruto chimed in after Sasuke had laid back down and the situation had cooled considerably, more like he was informing her than asking her however.

“Not even in your dreams is that going to happen, Naruto,” the girl adamantly stood her ground, refusing yet another one of his attempts as she too laid back down into the grass.

“So meeeean,” the rejected boy complained loudly like a pouting little child.

“What about me?” Sasuke asked all of a sudden, interrupting Naruto's whining before he had a chance to try his luck and get shot down yet again. “Am I there?” Sasuke asked this with random curiosity.

“Yeah, yeah!” Naruto replied excitedly, quickly rebounding from his rejection. “Let's see, when I’m Hokage then you’ll be… My right hand man!” he stated triumphantly as he decided on Sasuke's position in the village.

Sasuke was thrown completely off guard by this, not even capable of hiding his shock. He had expected some horrible fate for himself in Naruto’s optimal imagined future. Sasuke had expected Naruto to say he would become his butler or dog or something equally degrading and awful, a task designed primarily to humiliate him. The fact that Naruto was so open about his desired outcome blew Sasuke away, the fact that he too had a place in Naruto's world, causing him to be temporarily stunned into silence. His stomach lurched oddly for just a moment in unexpected anticipation and confusion, completely taken aback by Naruto's honestly and kindness at that moment.

The feeling didn't last long, however. Naruto started giggling with glee after seeing Sasuke’s undeniably shocked face. That was certainly a good look for him, Naruto couldn't help but enjoy seeing his rival so stunned, his vicious mouth that spewed words of cruel intent silenced for once!

“What’s so funny? Sasuke asked him suspiciously, narrowing his brows.

“It’s just,” the blond started, trying to hold back his laughs and snorts as he explained, “It’s just that if you’re my right hand man… then that means you have to do whatever I say!” he continued, breaking into laughter and falling back into the grass. “I’m going to make you do so many embarrassing things! Like running around town in your underwear or eating bugs! And you'll have to do it because I'll be the Hokage, ha ha ha ha!” he cackled as he fell back into the grass, rolling around in hysterics.

Sasuke sighed and rolled his eyes. Well, so much for that thought. “What about you, Sakura? What’s your wish?” Sasuke questioned her, taking his attention off Naruto while the loser struggled to quiet his laughter and regain his composure.

“My wish? Well…” the girl started, but quickly trailed off into a mental fantasy and instead her mouth began to curve upwards as she smiled widely and her face once again began to redden as her goofy grin grew, only stutters and squeaks coming from her lips instead of explanations.

Blech, I bet Sakura’s thinking about how she wishes she could marry Sasuke or something, Naruto grimaced with disgust at the thought.

“What’s your wish, Sasuke?” Sakura asked him nervously, probably hoping it had something to do with her and eager to distract from her own embarrassing foray into secret-telling.

“I don’t believe in that kind of thing. Only little kids and Naruto think their wishes will come true,” Sasuke coldly informed her.

“Hey!” Naruto grumbled at Sasuke’s rude comment.

“Ah, crap! I didn’t know it was this late! My mom’s going to kill me," Sakura exclaimed with a grimace as bells chimed nearby in the village to inform the townspeople it was now 10 o'clock. "I have to go you guys," she informed her friends, springing to her feet and dusting her clothes of any loose grass or leaves. "Don’t stay out too long. Oh, and in case I don't see you tomorrow, good luck, both of you,” she sincerely wished them fortune in their battles with a warm smile before dashing back into town, hoping her parents would take pity and not ground her for breaking curfew.

"Sakura, Sakura! You could give me a kiss for luck, you know!" Naruto informed her, eagerly trying his luck once more. He never learned his lesson, did he?

"Not happening!" she called out sweetly as she darted off to face the punishment her parents would certainly lay down the law.

So then it was just the two of them laying there staring up at the sky, Naruto and Sasuke, rivals and teammates. Naruto took a covert look over at Sasuke out of the corner of his eyes. He seemed so...weirdly peaceful right now. Even if he still sounded grumpy, his scowl of annoyance was noticeably absent now. Laying there quietly underneath the starlight, his skin nearly the same pale ivory hue of the moon, his shaggy black hair mimicking the deep darkness separating the stars from each other. It was almost... beautiful in a strange way. There was a hunting calmness about the moment that stuck in Naruto's mind, something he was sure that he wouldn't soon forget.

“Sasuke? ...Do you really not have a wish?” Naruto broke the silence with an unexpected question aimed directly at fishing out Sasuke's true intentions... maybe even his feelings, something the two of them just didn't address no matter the situation.

“I told you, that’s just an old superstition. There's nothing I want to wish for. Even if I did, it wouldn’t come true.” Exactly. What was the point of wishing? Wishing, praying, that sort of helpless mentality wouldn't do anything to bring justice for his slaughtered family. Sasuke had said it once before right after the three of them had first been assigned together and had met Kakashi for the first time; his goal was no mere wish, no dream for the future, it was something he intended to make true no matter the cost to himself, no matter what he had to do. He would slay his elder brother, no matter what lengths he had to go to in order to accomplish that, no matter how far across the world he had to travel, how long he had to search, or how many obstacles lay in his path. Simply wishing for Itachi to drop off the face of the world wouldn't help any-if thoughts and wishes really could have the power to kill, Itachi would have been dead by now, Sasuke having imagined that fateful day that would come thousands of times by now-so it was completely pointless to even think about.

“Oh...” Naruto replied simply. But the tone of his voice was unmistakable... He actually sounded... oddly let down. Like he had expected Sasuke to share some big personal secret with him that he had never spoken to anyone before or something after all. As if he was hoping that Sasuke would open his heart to him and just for this single night they could truly bond. But Sasuke couldn't open his heart anymore; hatred and loss had sealed his heart long ago, whether he enjoyed that fact or not, it was a fact. He couldn't share silly secrets with friends and laugh happily about dumb things so long as Itachi was still out there, a dead man walking the world.

But really Naruto felt kind of sad for Sasuke. How could he not have some kind of wish, some secret desire buried in his heart, something beyond his gruesome goal of killing his brother, the only family he had left in this world? It made Naruto’s heart hurt a little. That Sasuke wanted and expected so very little out of life, that he had so few things left and cared about even fewer… well that was just a very sad thought to Naruto. Sasuke’s life seemed so empty to him. How could he bear it so well?

There was something Naruto had wanted to say to Sasuke for a while now, but even now in this quiet personal moment between them beneath the glimmering stars he couldn’t bring himself to say it. He just couldn't figure out the right words to say and he could never find the right time, the perfect moment to say it. He didn't even know how to begin to bring up the subject with Sasuke. So Naruto stayed quiet, keeping his thoughts to himself. Sasuke probably would have just made fun of him or ignored him even if he did find the courage to come out and say it anyways. But even so, Naruto really did want to tell his teammate something. He wanted to say… that somewhere along the line, after all the months working together on missions, despite their constant rivalry and insults, and through the occasional moments of gentle peace and calm between them just like this one now, that while they walked together along that path he had started to think of Sasuke… as his first real friend. And he wished so much he could just blurt it out, but fear hushed his words and kept him silent. But someday soon Naruto hoped he would be able to tell Sasuke just how uniquely important he had become to him, how much the first true friendship he had ever formed meant to him.

“...It is pretty though, isn’t it?” Naruto asked after a long period of quiet, hoping for at least that much.

“...Yeah, it is,” Sasuke quietly agreed.

But unbeknownst to Naruto, as Naruto asked him about his wish a thought went flashing through Sasuke’s mind. He hadn’t been entirely truthful with Naruto after all. There was something he could imagine wishing for, one tiny request that was actually massive in importance. He quickly suppressed and denied the feeling as it arose, not allowing himself to voice it or accept it. But before he had successfully caged the thought it had left a little mark in his subconscious, a paper cut that hurt profusely before it was locked away with the rest of his superfluous feelings that only served to distract him. But it had been there, even if only for the briefest of moments, that was undeniable. What had come into the forefront of his thoughts was not so much of a wish as it was a desire or a hope of sorts. For that brief instant Sasuke had though that if he did have a wish, then maybe it would have been… to stay here in the Leaf Village forever. To find some way to let go of his past and just have a normal life. To stay here with his precious comrades, go on missions and fight tough enemies and have ramen after a successful mission and to keep competing with and being annoyed by and fighting with that loser Naruto. An easy, simple life like that. That sounded… nice.

Maybe if his life had taken a different course things could have been different... But no, Sasuke didn't deal with 'maybes' or 'what ifs'. He had to deal with the poor hand he had been dealt by life... No, not by life but by that twisted psychotic brother of his. He was the one who had created this situation, not fate. Sasuke had no time to contend with his current reality, no matter how unpleasant, he had to focus on the here and now, not get lost in fantasies and daydreams of events that would never occur.

So Sasuke didn't allow the feeling to take root. As soon it it came rushing into his mind he began deflecting and fighting the thought, lest it infect his blood like a terrible poison. He knew that wishing for things was pointless. And wishing for things that would never happen was even more stupidly pointless. That happy future he had envisioned for that split second wouldn’t come. Not ever. Those were things that he could never have. Deep down Sasuke knew that some day soon he would have to leave this place, abandon his comrades to seek out Itachi. He would have to throw everything away to accomplish the mission given to him by the restless spirits of his kinsmen. He was an avenger after all. Why bother wasting time and effort wishing for something that he knew would never come true anyways? His life was on a completely different path than that, despite whatever his subconscious mind wanted or desired. Even so… It really was such a beautiful night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter is much later than I intended my dear readers (wanted to post before Halloween but wasn't even close to finished). Between writer's block, not sleeping well, and personal life stuff (and presidential election crap too) I haven't been feeling in the mood to write much since my last update, which delayed this chapter. 
> 
> Because of that, I'm not happy with the quality of this chapter at all, but didn't want people to wait EVEN LONGER while I ironed out all my issues, so I'll post now and come back to edit later. I'll let you know in the Author's Note of a future chapter when I'm completely finished so you can revisit and see the updated version. I know the quality might not match previous chapters right now and I'm sorry for that, but it's only temporary until my mojo comes back and I can edit and expand it to be better, so please bear with me for the time being.
> 
> The NEXT chapter though is already written (and has cute, awkward first time sex between two certain dorks) but I need to make sure it's up to snuff, which shouldn't take another two months (hopefully *laughs nervously*), ̶m̶a̶y̶b̶e̶ ̶t̶w̶o̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶s̶.̶
> 
> As a bonus since it takes me so long to update, I've decided to start telling you the next chapter's title as a sneak preview from now on! So Chapter 5 will be called "Strength of Feelings and Feelings of Strength".


	5. Strength of Feelings and Feelings of Strength

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the eve of the Chunin Exams things begin to get hot and heavy in more ways than one as Naruto worries over his chances against the bitter prodigy Neji Hyuga, while Sasuke learns some distressing realities about his teammate's everyday life that he's not quite sure how to deal with. The continuously evolving secret physical relationship between the two frenemies at last culminates in a single shocking yet massively important action as the boys look to each other for some unspoken mutual support before the dangerous trials that lie ahead for them both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We finally get some real action! ...Maybe I should increase the rating to explicit, ha ha. 
> 
> As I said in the notes of Chapter 1, this WON'T just be SasuNaru even though Sasuke tops this time around. That being said, I find top/seme and bottom/uke roles to be horribly stereotypical and unrealistic, and on top of that I don't think either role ideally suits either Naruto or Sasuke's personalities or explains their layered relationship. Both guys will have a chance to lead and be the one in charge, but in a more 'go with the flow and do what feels good' type of atmosphere. Their sexual interactions are a power struggle, switching between trying to make each other feel good, enjoying themselves, and proving their masculinity and courage to the other. So if you're hoping to see either Naruto or Sasuke in a feminine whimpering passive role, I'm sorry to say you have the wrong fic.

“Can you believe that little Uzumaki loser got into the Chunin Exam finals?” Sasuke overheard a bulky bearded man a little ways down the street loudly ask the compatriot standing next to him as the boy casually strolled along on his customary evening walk. “Why’d they even let that monster kid compete in the first place?” he shouted irately, uncaring of who heard his complaints or who he inconvenienced with his bitter words. The pair of men were both swaying slightly in place as they exchanged complaints, wet eyed and lush faced and slurring their grievances; they were obviously plastered drunk, despite the fact that the sun hadn't even set yet. _Losers with nothing better to do than get drunk during the day while they bitch and moan,_ Sasuke unrepentantly labeled the duo in his mind as he eyed the two rough-looking middle-aged men talking animatedly outside the entrance of a bar further down the road ahead of him.

“I know what you mean,” the other one, a short, wiry thin man covered in an assortment of scars, replied with a noticeable drunken speech impediment, lazily nodding in agreement with his friend’s sentiments on the subject. “The prelims must have been really easy this year for a screw up like him to get in. Honestly, I’m still surprised they even let him become a genin in the first place. I heard he failed the Academy graduation exam a bunch of times. Ah well, there’s no way that kid can beat Neji anyways. Should be pretty fun to see him get trashed!” he chuckled cruelly at the thought of Naruto's loss. “He’ll be done for in 30 seconds flat, I guarantee it! Maybe getting knocked down a few pegs will get him to give up on being a ninja and make him crawl back into the corner where he belongs.”

 _Jeez, it’s sure easy to talk when you don’t know shit about what you're saying,_ Sasuke angrily remarked as he neared the two guys and they continued discussing the exam finals, moving from Naruto’s scandalous participation in the event to which contestant they had bets on to win the whole tournament. The fact that one of the men, the big bearded one, had placed a large wager on Sasuke to be the ultimate victor meant nothing to him; Sasuke had no interest in their opinion of him, or anyone’s opinion of his ability or actions for that matter. He didn’t seek strength for fame or personal glory, nor did he do it to gain acceptance like Naruto did. He simply needed strength in order to hunt down and kill that monster known as Itachi Uchiha, a man of a terrifying, almost unbelievable level of power. That had been his life since that same monster had slaughtered everyone Sasuke had cared about and morphed his shape from the beloved and admired older brother to the despised butcher and destroyer, changing his colors like a deceptive, bloodthirsty chameleon. So to Sasuke what these two drunk morons thought of him meant even less than what an ant thought of him, its was so far from his realm of caring. Their wounding insults thrown at Naruto were a different matter though. _That_ Sasuke did mind for some reason he wasn’t so sure of himself. All he knew was that their mocking of his teammate swept a feeling of annoyance and frustration through him like a hot summer breeze.

Sasuke was almost tempted to tell them off, pointedly inform them of how moronic they were and how little they understood, but he figured it would have been a pointless gesture trying to correct a pair of drunken fools, so he merely glared daggers at the two older men in a silent act of comeuppance as he passed by them. It was little more than a meaningless act of youthful defiance that did them no real harm, but Sasuke wanted to do it anyways; he had no tolerance for this kind of pointless badmouthing. The names they called him... Sure Naruto was a handful always tricking people, but _monster_? What had he ever done to deserve that much hate? Besides, picking on Naruto was _his_ job, how dare these assholes intrude on Sasuke's territory. They didn’t know Naruto like he did, they never saw the boy work his ass off time and time again to the point of physical exhaustion, striving to be better than he was. They had no idea just how hard he tried to gain the approval of people just like themselves, people who either hated him and mocked him or ignored his existence completely. Just why Naruto wanted acknowledgment from worthless pieces of shit like these was entirely beyond Sasuke. Nevertheless, Sasuke committed to his childish, almost Naruto-like solution and gave the two men the best look of disapproving anger he could muster. If the drunks even noticed the scowl Sasuke threw their way they choose not to react however, and merely continued loudly chatting on about the fights, making themselves a nuisance of the whole busy street with their stupor and shouts. They were probably too drunk to even realize one of the contestants they were speaking about had passed right by them.

Unfortunately for Naruto, this wasn’t the first set of disparaging remarks Sasuke had heard uttered about his partner since he had been announced as a contestant in the finals, and sad to say it probably wouldn't be the last either. Though to be honest, Sasuke didn’t know if people were speaking ill of Naruto more these days because the unexpected news had made him a hot topic for discussion–or ridicule to be more accurate–or if Sasuke had simply become more aware of something he would have typically ignored completely. Before coming into Team 7 this was exactly the kind of crap he choose to let fall beneath his gaze, but... it was much harder to do so these days, more difficult to look away and shut his ears from the truth. After some consideration, Sasuke decided it must have been the latter option. It made sense after all, considering how desperate Naruto was for attention and acknowledgement from anyone who would give it to him. Sasuke tended to ignore anything and everything that didn’t relate to gaining strength for himself; interaction with other people was, until recently, not an important or needed experience for him. But now that he had a team things had changed somewhat. He had been forced to open up, even if it was just slightly, to accommodate his new partners Sakura and Naruto. In doing so Sasuke found himself learning about them, their likes and dislikes, their personality quirks, their techniques and methods in battle. He had been aware of Naruto for a long time now, ever since their earliest Academy days, but it was only in getting paired with him that Sasuke realized just how truly isolated Naruto was in the village, the extant of his exile from normal society. It was no longer any secret, Sasuke noticed the sideways glances of hate people cast at Naruto while they walked down the street. It was any wonder he was so desperate to be liked, for people to notice him. In any case, Sasuke did his best to ignore the venomous words pouring from the villagers’ mouths about his comrade. Their uncaring harshness towards someone they didn't understand or know at all upset Sasuke, but he tried his best to not let it faze him; getting angry at them on Naruto’s behalf wouldn't fix anything, and would more than likely just cause Naruto to yell at him for butting in on something that wasn’t his business.

Though he never would have said so to the moron in question's face, Sasuke felt a growing sympathy for Naruto considering all the ridiculous crap he had to deal with from the villagers. Having everyone write him out before he even had a chance to explain himself or make an attempt must have been a beyond frustrating experience. Naruto hadn't even taken one step into the arena and people were acting as if he had already lost. The thought that Naruto had so few people that supported him, let alone to even acknowledge his existence or to simply be kind to him, left Sasuke feeling oddly dispirited. More and more over the months as they spent time both on and off missions together, he found himself feeling sorry for the boy, and as time passed on Sasuke also found himself wanting to support Naruto in a way, even if only in a small manner. Sasuke was... fine with being alone, but Naruto wasn't. Most people weren't equipped for that kind of life. But there was nothing he could do or say, nothing that would reassure Naruto. They weren't friends anyways, so what difference was Naruto's emotional suffering to him? Still, Sasuke wanted to do something. So he resolved to be the best rival he could for Naruto, to give him at least one person who treated the boy normally, without prejudice or judgment. That was all Sasuke could think to do for him. Their relationship was abnormal, but there was a stability in that abnormalness, a kind of reassuring peace to that bond. Just as Sasuke clung to his hate for Itachi to continue forward, so too could Naruto ground himself in their rivalry, use it to stay afloat in the vast sea that was a lonely existence.

Naruto may have been brash, thickheaded, noisy, and stubborn, but Sasuke didn’t exactly dislike him, despite those numerous annoyances. There was a certain something he couldn’t quite explain about the blond ninja that inexorably drew Sasuke to him. He found his teammate to be… interesting. At the very least, the time he spent with Naruto was never boring. He was cheery, excitable, and always livened up a situation with his mouthy attitude and do or die ways. Competing with Naruto always gave Sasuke a rush of excitement that very few things in life did for him anymore.

Sasuke found Naruto’s rivalry to be a good thing for himself as well; Naruto's ceaseless desire to grow and learn and beat Sasuke at every available juncture also pushed Sasuke to stay ahead of his fellow rival, to try that much harder so he could rub it in Naruto’s dumb face. As Naruto raced to catch up with him, Sasuke worked to maintain his edge in their endless competition. It wasn’t out of hatred or bitterness though; if he were to be truthful with himself, Sasuke actually liked the way Naruto looked at him, with those envious yet admiring eyes that sought to surpass him and prove his own worth. Deep down Sasuke thoroughly enjoyed their rivalry and believed it brought out the best in both of them; Naruto tried harder than he ever did while seeking to one up Sasuke, and Sasuke pushed himself to his limits in response. Neither of them would have admitted it to the other, but their rivalry that had sprouted from an initial mutual dislike had now grown into a two way sense of admiration and understanding between them. Naruto was the only person Sasuke felt comfortable enough with to lower his guard even the slightest bit; their now halted former secret meet ups at night more than proved proved that.

Sasuke sighed to himself in frustration. He continued to walk slowly throughout the town with no particular destination in mind, a ritual he had participated in for as long as he could remember. Whenever he needed to clear his mind of distractions or felt he was getting too emotional, brimming with the feelings he kept bottled up inside which occasionally threatened to overflow like a overfull tea cup, Sasuke found that taking a leisurely stroll helped him to calm down and sort things out in his head. It was the only weakness he allowed himself, the only moments where he let himself feel human again and not just a weapon brought into this world for the sole purpose of striking down Itachi. During these ramblings he thought about many things he would have never thought otherwise, such as those irritating, more positive feelings on Naruto, things that most of the time were only distractions that weakened his resolve, things that he would have preferred not to think about. It was only when he wandered the village as crowds of people went on their way home to prepare dinner or groups of friends started on their way to go out drinking together at bars and the sun set low in the sky, casting an orange shadow on everything as the cicadas chirped loudly in the trees that he let himself be Sasuke the individual before being a son of the Uchiha clan.

He should have been thinking about his training at the moment, especially considering how he wasn’t finished perfecting his new technique yet, but for some reason, today Naruto’s dumb grinning face just kept popping into his mind no matter what he did, refusing to allow him to focus. After a number of only semi-successful attempts at using his new jutsu, Kakashi had allowed Sasuke to take the rest of the evening off to relax and recoup after the long weeks of difficult training. Sasuke had tried to protest, but his teacher had insisted. It wasn’t like he was a fool; Sasuke knew being worn out would only hurt his chances in the competition, but he also understood how dangerous an enemy Gaara was, even for someone like himself. He would need all the practice he could get in order to win. Even after much fruitless arguing between them Kakashi still wouldn’t relent, so Sasuke finally begrudgingly gave in and went out for a long walk to smooth out his flustered emotions. Naruto kept appearing in his thoughts as he strolled the streets, even though Sasuke hadn’t intended to think of him.

It had been nearly a full month since they had last met up or spoken to each other. Sasuke hadn’t visited Naruto’s house late at night in quite a while, ever since the last time when he reacted badly to how unexpectedly heated things were becoming and ran away, way back before the Chunin Exams had even started. Then when that occasion was added together with what they had done in the Forest of Death things probably would have been very awkward between them. The memory of the two of them standing side by side, the raspy breaths they each let out as they both were swept away by lust, the feeling of Naruto’s hand tightly gripped around his penis and his own hand wrapped around Naruto's throbbing member as they jerked each other off caused Sasuke to flush with embarrassment and shame; he still couldn’t believe that he had done something like that. There was no way he could see Naruto again without those images flashing into his mind now.

Even so, he did wish to see his teammate, even if only for a little while; Sasuke felt oddly bored without the boisterous ninja around to lighten the mood. He could definitely use someone to talk to right now, someone to spend a few stress free hours with and really relax for the first time in a month. Sasuke could never ask something like that of Kakashi out of pure pride and Sakura would probably have been more interested in talking about him rather than talking with him. The only other person he could hang out with was that stupid loser. After all, who else did Sasuke have in his life besides them? Those three were the only people in the world he had to depend on at all.

Sasuke also found himself curious how Naruto’s training was going along. Hopefully the boy did more than pig out on ramen and nap the days away; Sasuke would be sorely disappointed if Naruto didn’t give him a good challenge when they fought. It was so strange how much Sasuke suddenly desired Naruto’s presence; when you got used to someone being around day after day and then suddenly they vanished things tended to get boring without them. He wouldn’t have liked to admit it to anyone, but Sasuke was a creature of habit who relied on strict schedules and timetables in his daily life. It sorely bothered him when wrenches were thrown into his plans. Day after day spent with Naruto and now he was suddenly gone; it felt like something was missing. For better or worse, Naruto was part of his everyday life now and his absence was definitely felt.

***

The Chunin Exam finals were only a day away now. Tomorrow. It seemed so close, but at the same time after all his difficult training it seemed so far away Naruto wondered if it would ever arrive. The minutes seemed to tick by so slowly to Naruto, time crawling at a snail's pace. The tension built inside him like a lake of water being held back by a dam threatening to burst at any moment. He had never been very good at waiting or being patient, and having to wait a whole month to make his spectacular debut was almost painful. Naruto got nervous butterflies flapping around in his stomach just thinking about fighting in front of so many people, so many of those who quietly cursed him and despised his existence. He had no choice; he had to win. There was no other option for him, it was the only way he could gain the respect and acknowledgement he desired so much. The thought of fighting in front of so many people only added to Naruto’s irritated anticipation as he waited for the moment to finally arrive.

Mixed in with that apprehension, however, was a great deal of excitement; finally he would be able to show everyone just how strong he really was. His training with that perverted sage Jiraiya had given him a superb boost of confidence and ability. Not only did he feel stronger than he had before, he was more comfortable with his own strength level. Naruto had never thought of himself as weaker than Sasuke, but after so many times seeing the smug boy perform jutsu so expertly and perfectly while he himself struggled to learn new techniques and use them ably, well it did leave a little seed of doubt inside. But with his new training he had refused to let that seed grow any longer. Naruto now had become what he had felt he always should have been from the start; a ninja able to stand on equal terms with Sasuke. All his hard work and perseverance thus far, from his very first fights in the Land of Waves to the hellish battles for survival in the Forest of Death to his unexpected victory over Kiba in the prelims, all of these had set him on this path and prepared him for what was to come. The anticipation of winning another battle was practically killing him.

Despite this, Naruto couldn’t help but worry about a number of things; that creepy-looking guy Gaara from the Sand Village and his attempt to kill Lee as the wounded boy slept in the hospital, just how on earth he was going to beat Neji, who was regarded as the strongest rookie in the whole Leaf Village, and the fact that Sasuke had all but disappeared over the past month. Naruto had yet to see him even once since they had begun their individual training regimens. He was too busy most of the time to think about how Sasuke was doing, but every now and then Sasuke slipped into his thoughts during the little free time he had left and it still concerned Naruto that hadn’t seen the boy.

The fact was Naruto wanted to see Sasuke more than anyone else at the moment. Mostly to rub his new power in his stupid cocky face, but it was a little lonely without his team around him to spend the days with. Iruka and his teammates were pretty much the only people Naruto felt he could really trust. Nearly everyone else acted ambivalent, hateful, or uncaring towards him. There were a few exceptions, like the chef at Ichiraku Ramen, the pervy sage Jiraiya, the Third Hokage, and some of the other genin rookies, but they weren’t people Naruto felt he could personally place his faith in, people who stood next to Naruto and made him feel like he was somebody. Simply put, they weren’t friends. Maybe they could be someday, but right now only Iruka, Kakashi, Sakura, and–despite how they usually acted together–Sasuke as well had gained that level of trust with Naruto. It was only natural for Naruto to be wary of trusting others; there had never been anyone for him to place his faith in before. It was hard to truly trust people when you grew up isolated and alone, unknowing of how to interact well with others and shunned by society. Anyways, the only person Naruto had spent the past month with was Jiraiya, making him feel a bit cut off from the rest of the world. Not being around the few friends that he had made Naruto feel like he had when he was a small kid and he had been truly alone, without anyone at all who cared.

As Naruto walked down the street heading home from another long, tiring day of training, he spotted a familiar visage. As if his thoughts had summoned him from thin air, when Naruto took a closer look ahead down the street he spotted Sasuke off in the distance, staring down at his feet as he slowly meandered along the side of the road. _Ah, there’s Sasuke. Yeah, that’s definitely him. I’d recognize that duck-butt haircut anywhere._

“Sasuke!” Naruto called out excitedly, causing the black haired boy to quickly jerk his head up as if startled to see who had dared to call out his name and unwillingly shake from his deep thought. Naruto ran up to greet him with a big smile on his face. “I’d expected you to still be training right now considering what a stubborn bastard you are. What are you doing out here?” It probably came off as too cheery, but Naruto was genuinely happy to see his rival for the first time in a month, so it was difficult to hide his excitement. It just felt weird when they weren't around each other to compete and talk trash to the other for so long.

“...Just walking,” Sasuke replied in a strangely mellow tone, returning to staring at his feet as he continued to aimlessly stroll down the road. Naruto kept pace along beside him, slinging his arms behind his head with his elbows poking out into the air as he stuck close to Sasuke.

“Walking, huh?” Naruto asked, somewhat thrown off by Sasuke’s unexpectedly passive response. _Does Sasuke like to walk? What kind of weird hobby is that? ...Wait, now’s my chance!_ “Do you like to go walking?” he impulsively asked. It sounded like a dumb question when he said it out loud, but Naruto suddenly recalled Kakashi’s talk from a while ago about discussing things with people you had feelings for, how getting to know people was important to getting closer to them. Not that he actually had feelings for Sasuke. It was just that when he thought about it, maybe this was Naruto’s chance to try to find out more about Sasuke. Maybe they could actually find something they liked about each other and move past their bitter rivalry.

“Yeah. Helps me think…” Sasuke said softly without looking up at Naruto as he still wandered at a slow pace down the street, bringing Naruto tagging along with him like a baby duck trailing behind its mother struggling to keep up and groups of people quickly passed by the sluggish pair on their way home or out for a night of fun and drinking. Naruto almost had to force himself to walk this slow; he wasn’t used to being so meditative and calm. If he had someplace to be he wanted to get there in a flash.

“I see...” Naruto replied, not knowing exactly what to say in return. A long period of silence then developed as they walked side by side, Sasuke unwilling to talk and Naruto not knowing how to start a conversation with him. _Crap! Well that didn’t work,_ Naruto thought to himself, frustrated at his failed efforts.

“Uummmmm… S-so how’s your training going?” Naruto finally spoke up and broke the long awkward silence between them, hoping he had landed on a good topic for discussion.

“Good,” Sasuke replied simply, again avoiding any long answers.

“My training’s going great! I’ve gotten way stronger, you know. I’m definitely going to beat Neji, so you have to beat Gaara…” Naruto trailed off, trying not to sound as eager as he really was for a match against Sasuke.

Sasuke finally lifted his head back up from his shoes–which must have been very interesting considering how much he had been staring down at them–and looked at Naruto dead on. They both suddenly stopped in place as an unexpected sense of tension rose out of the strange situation. Sasuke’s formerly emotionless features were now twisted into a small, almost invisible smile as he stared directly into Naruto’s eyes. “I’m looking forward to it,” he said, nodding slightly. Naruto knew something about him was different though. He didn’t seem to be acting like the usual Sasuke did. Something seemed to be weighing him down, keeping from being like he normally was. His odd mood concerned Naruto a little; was even the highly talented Sasuke Uchiha worried about the outcome of the Chunin Exams? Or was something else bothering him entirely, something he wanted to keep from the awareness of others? Naruto wanted to ask him, but couldn’t find the right words to bring it up without sounding like he was prying into Sasuke’s private life, which would likely get him nothing more than a snub accompanied by some insults.

Still, even considering Sasuke’s somewhat out of character words and manner, Naruto was pleased with finally drawing him into conversation. Or at least getting him to say more than two words _. Yes! Finally some results!_ he silently cheered himself on. “You know, I’ve gotten so strong that I might even beat you! Actually, I’m definitely going to defeat you! And when I do win I bet you’ll get so frustrated that you’ll cry. If you ask me nicely I might even consider teaching you some of my secrets,” Naruto said with a mirthful confident chuckle. Before Sasuke could make a snappy comeback Naruto loudly cleared his throat and attempted his best Sasuke impersonation, scrunching his face into a comical overly glum scowl and belting out in a lower tone of voice, “Naruto, just how did you get so strong? I’m sorry I’ve been a big jerk all this time. You’re so cool, let’s be best buddies.”

“We’ll see about that, idiot,” Sasuke laughed derisively at Naruto, shaking his head in annoyance. “Don’t get your hopes up, there’s no way a loser like you could ever compare to me.” He then paralleled Naruto by impersonating him as well, donning an obviously fake cheesy grin as he spoke in a more rapid, excited manner than his normal speaking voice, “Oh Sasuke, I’m such a loser. Why did I ever think I could best you in battle? I’m sorry I ever doubted your greatness, so please be my friend and teach me how not to be an idiot, dattebayo!”

His pensive muteness was gone and he had returned to the normal bastard Sasuke after their exchange of mocking comments. Had his previous sullen state been just an illusion after all? Perhaps Naruto just read his mood wrong; it wasn’t like he understood Sasuke all that well after all. As much as Naruto wanted to believe that, something kept bugging him. That expression that Sasuke had looked at him with, it had seemed almost… sad. An emotion Naruto had never seen from Sasuke, like he was filled up with things he desperately wanted to say, but didn’t know how to even begin to. _No, it must have been a mistake. I’m just tired, I’m probably seeing things_ , Naruto assured himself. Sasuke actually being sad was just too out there of a theory to consider.

“Argh, shut up, shut up! I’ll show you!” Naruto yelled out as the pair began walking again, causing a few bystanders to look their way in confusion. Even though Sasuke was insulting him, Naruto couldn't help but laugh a little at Sasuke’s impersonation of him; it was very rare for Sasuke to do anything playful like that. Even more surprising, as Naruto happily laughed, Sasuke started to chuckle as well, though he seemed to be trying his hardest to hold it back. His suppressed laughter came out as a sort of snorting cough like sound, desperate as he was to maintain his cool air. But try as he might, Sasuke’s shroud of detachment fell apart and he began to earnestly laugh along with Naruto. He just couldn’t hold it in anymore, and for the first time in many years Sasuke allowed himself one brief moment of fun to act stupid with a friend like a normal thirteen year old boy. Something about seeing Naruto smile and laugh like a carefree moron made Sasuke want to join in, and the opposite was true as well; seeing the bitter and grumpy Sasuke actually enjoy himself for once left a pleasant feeling in Naruto’s heart.

Sasuke’s small quiet laughs underlined Naruto’s loud boisterous ones that echoed through the streets, a concert of amusement. The sight of the monster boy Naruto so publicly enjoying himself drew a number of glares from passersby, mostly those who hated him, but Naruto couldn’t care less at the moment; Sasuke had dropped his guard and allowed Naruto a peek inside, perhaps signifying that they had finally built up a little trust between them. People could stare and curse him for being annoying all they wanted; this was everything Naruto had ever wanted, to just spend time acting stupid with someone who could be considered a friend, and he wouldn’t let them ruin his long awaited moment of happiness.

The boys’ idiotic laughter was interrupted by a long, remarkably loud gurgling noise coming from Naruto’s stomach. The sound seemed to split the air and dissolve their joy like a booming roll of thunder.

“Ehehehe,” he laughed sheepishly, patting his belly as if to quiet down the insatiable monster that was his stomach.

“Jeez, even your stomach is loud and annoying,” Sasuke commented and rolled his eyes. It was such a typically 'Naruto-like' thing to happen so he wasn't surprised in the least.

“Screw you! I didn’t have lunch today so I’m starving!” Naruto paused for a second to think then asked, “...Have you eaten yet?”

“I was just about to once I got home,” Sasuke replied, expecting precisely where this train of thought was headed. Naruto talking about food meant only one thing.

“Hey hey, if you aren’t too busy being a big jerk d’you want to come grab some ramen with me?” Naruto asked nonchalantly, pretending it made no difference to him either way.

“...I suppose I could grace you with my presence,” Sasuke said with an artificial aloofness, both of them completely avoiding their mutual feelings of wanting to see each other and spend time together after their long separation, too prideful and stubborn to admit to those feelings.

“Aw, whatever you stuck up dick,” Naruto replied, waving him off with false irritation. “Anyways... You're paying, right?” he giggled expectantly with a pleading grin. The only thing he seemed to love more than eating ramen was having other people pay for his ramen. And maybe pissing off Sasuke came pretty close too.

“No way,” Sasuke refuted with a glare. He knew just how much Naruto could eat. He wasn’t going to foot the bill just so the idiot could gorge himself.

“Ugh! Fine!” Naruto shouted dramatically. “I’ll pay for this time, but you have to swear to pay for us next time or so help me!” Naruto threatened, shaking an angry fist at Sasuke.

“Whatever,” the black haired boy sighed noncommittally, pretending he hadn’t heard Naruto’s request, but he did make a mental note to bring extra money with him next time he got some down time. ‘Swear to pay of us next time or so help me’ was pretty much like saying ‘Let’s eat together again sometime,’ in Naruto language, a confusing, rapid, nonsensical dialect spoken by one particular blond idiot living in the Hidden Leaf Village. Naruto was so evasive and contradictory when he spoke that it got on Sasuke’s nerves, but as he thought of that Sasuke realized he wasn’t exactly one to talk since he was pretty much the same way.

Naruto took out a fat, green frog shaped wallet stuffed with a treasure trove of bills and coins, a bright smile appearing on his face as he glanced at all that money.

“Ah, my froggy is so cute!” Naruto cooed over the wallet, nuzzling it against his cheek affectionately. The bizarre sight completely stupefied Sasuke; it contrasted so much with the usual tough guy act that Naruto put on, that mouthy attitude that he loved to annoy Sasuke so much with. Watching this made Sasuke wonder just what other hidden sides Naruto had to himself, what things did he keep hidden from his fellow Team 7 members, what kind of things did he keep buried down so deep that even he would like to pretend they didn't exist. What kind of person was Naruto really, when separated from all posturing and pretending?

***

“...Do you usually have dinner here?” Sasuke inquired as he and Naruto sat down at the counter of the Ichiraku Ramen shop and promptly ordered their meals.

“Huh? Oh, no I usually make something at home for dinner and breakfast. But I do try to have lunch here every day that I can! And I _always_ have dinner here with Iruka-sensei after we finish a mission. I really miss it when we’re out on missions,” Naruto explained, sounding far more lovelorn than he should have when talking about food.

Sasuke knew that feeling, what it was like eating at an empty dinner table only all too well. It’s not like there was anyone waiting for him at his house either, preparing a hot meal to sit down with and to ask him how his day was or what jutsu he had learned or how his recent mission had gone while they laughed and chatted as they ate together. It was just a big dark house filled with memories of people long since gone. Having a meal together with someone, even if it was that dimwit Naruto, was a nice, but an all too bittersweet, nostalgic experience.

The chef came around from the back of the restaurant and placed two steaming bowls of ramen down on the counter, one in front of each boy. Naruto rubbed his hands together greedily as his eyes glimmered and sparkled in delight like he had just set his sight on a long lost lover or something. A trail of drool dripped from the corner of his mouth in famished anticipation. “Time to eat!” he cried out with glee.

They didn’t speak much to each other much beyond small pointless chatter, too focused on their meals to bother, but even without any important conversation going on eating with someone was still better than eating all alone in their empty houses.

Taking a sideways look over at Naruto while the blond kid merrily chowed down, Sasuke was relieved he had refused to pay for his meal; in the time it had taken for him to finish just one of the considerably big bowls the amazing black hole that was Naruto’s stomach had managed to devour three whole bowls already and he was well on his way to finishing his fourth.

 _That’s… actually kind of impressive,_ Sasuke remarked, watching Naruto slurp down more and more food, almost mesmerized as the food vanished into thin air so quickly. _It’s a good thing you’re so energetic and you have such a high metabolism or else you would be as big as a house,_ he thought, smiling slightly at the imagined image of a plump, round Naruto rolling into a group of enemies and knocking them down like a bowling ball crashing into a set of pins.

As the chef came back to set Sasuke’s second bowl and the glutton Naruto’s fifth down on the table Sasuke noticed the stark difference in appearance between their meals; Sasuke had selected a nice blending of noodles, meat, and vegetables good for both energy and health. Naruto’s bowl on the other hand was brimming almost entirely with meat, the few vegetables actually present smothered under a mountain of pork. In a weird sort of way the two opposite meals ideally represented their vastly contrasting personalities.

Taking it upon himself to see that Naruto got a properly balanced meal for once, Sasuke took a bundle of cabbage from his own ramen with his chopsticks and nonchalantly placed it atop the mountain of meat in Naruto’s dish before going back to eating his own noodles as if he had done nothing at all.

“Uh, what are you doing?” Naruto asked, confused at Sasuke’s actions.

“You need more vegetables,” Sasuke replied plainly, his expression not changing at all, but inside he was sorely embarrassed with what he had just done.

“Awww, c’mon, not you too!” Naruto howled at Sasuke, irritated with his obnoxious unneeded display of concern. “Sakura’s always going on and on about how I should eat more vegetables. Kakashi-sensei too! You guys should just butt out and let me eat what I want!”

“Maintaining a healthy diet is part of your job as a ninja, stupid. No wonder you’re so useless on missions, all you do is pig out on ramen,” Sasuke spouted out venomously in return.

“What was that you bastard!? So you’re saying you actually like eating this stuff?!” Naruto shouted with surprise, springing up from his seat and pointing down at the cabbage like it were some sort of mutant abomination defiling his sacred food.

“Of course I do,” Sasuke said with a haughty air about him, “but then again, I’m not a stupid useless loser who can’t even eat properly.”

“Grrr,” Naruto growled at Sasuke as the obnoxious boy continued to steadily, methodically eat his own food, paying Naruto no mind. Normally he would have wanted to start a fight with Sasuke for his offensive comments, but Naruto restrained himself all he could; after all, he was trying to get to a better, more stable place in his relationship with Sasuke. Beating his ass would do no good in that department. Besides that though, Naruto didn’t want to cause a commotion or end up wrecking anything here at Ichiraku Ramen, this most holy and wonderful of places. This place was very important to Naruto; he was actually treated with dignity here, like he wasn’t the Nine Tailed Fox but just any other customer coming for delicious food. Teuchi, the chef, and his daughter Ayame didn’t fear or ignore Naruto, making them some of the very few people in the village who treated Naruto like he was actually human. Their kindness and normalness towards him helped to get Naruto through some of the darkest times of his life, something he was eternally grateful for.

Naruto reluctantly withheld his rage, resisting his fiery urge to deck Sasuke, and sat back down in his seat. He glared down at those unappetizing green vegetables making a mockery of him, as if treating them with his withering gaze would cause them to flee in terror. But no, he just had to eat them no matter what! If Sasuke could stomach this junk then so could he! He wouldn’t let Sasuke make him into a laughingstock who couldn’t even eat the same things Sasuke did let alone equal him in a fight. It was just food after all! Naruto timidly reached out his pair of chopsticks and poked at the cabbage like it were some sort of strange lab experiment, then ever so slowly picked up one of the leaves and placed it in his mouth, crunching down.

“Bleh. Tastes like leaves,” he muttered with a disgusted grimace on his face, but continued eating the cabbage pieces Sasuke put in his bowl without too many more complaints.

As Sasuke amused himself with the sight of Naruto chewing on the vegetables with a grimace looking more like he were eating poison than food, two young men both roughly around 18 or 19 years old walked into the stall, only to stop dead in their tracks once they saw Naruto sitting there enjoying his meal–minus the leafy greens of course.

“Ugh, _he’s_ here,” one of the teens, the shorter of the pair with a head of shaggy brown hair, complained in disgust, looking down at Naruto like he were nothing more than a cockroach or spider or some other creepy crawler dirtying up the restaurant with his filthy presence.

From the time Sasuke and Naruto had entered the shop the cicadas that had been noisy chirping away in the trees had since ceased their chatter and the yellowish lights had flickered on in windows across town as the sun crested behind a hill and vanished. Sasuke would have expected a dinner rush of hungry patrons to be here by now as ninja getting off duty came looking for a good meal, but strangely the two young genin were the only customers in the otherwise empty place until this pair of older teens had walked in. It was only when Sasuke heard the boy's scoff of revulsion at Naruto's mere presence in the building that he realized just why the restaurant was so empty when it normally should have been packed with famished ninjas: it was because Naruto was eating here right now. No one would want to come here right now if it meant sitting near the shame of the village, that monster boy loathed by all. This fact hit Sasuke like a ton of bricks; he knew Naruto wasn't a welcome presence anywhere around town–even when they were little kids way back before they had been teamed up he had known that much–but he had never completely understood until now just how far people would go out of their way to avoid and isolate Naruto.

“Damn. I suggested we get ramen because it sounded good and he’s usually not here around this time, but I didn't know he was gonna be around. You wanna still eat here?” the other young man, taller than his friend with dirty blond hair that was cropped short, asked the brown haired guy, a sickened look on his face while he spoke.

“No way, man, I can’t sit in there with him!" brown hair exclaimed. "Dude this sucks, I was really looking forward to getting some food after that mission!”

“I know what you mean. Let’s just wait until he leaves to go in, yeah? He creeps me out big time. I swear, those whisker marks on his face make him look like a demon or something,” blondie said shivering in disgust.

“Ha ha, I don’t know about that, but he is certainly weird. My mom says he causes a lot of trouble for everyone for no reason so it’s just best to ignore him and stay away. She also told me the little bastard set a trap that dumped a bucket full of ice water on her friends husband a few months back.”

“Jeez, why does the Hokage make us put up with him?” brown hair asked, shaking his head, unable to understand. “I get what your mom means, but it’s kinda hard to ignore the little freak when he’s in everyone's face all the time,” the shorter boy said, causing them both to laugh as if he had said a particularly funny joke. Once they had gotten their fill of amusement badmouthing Naruto they shifted to other topics and left the stall, standing just outside the wide entryway chatting loudly–still within hearing distance in case they had more cruel words to fling Naruto’s way–as they waited for the inconveniencing target of their persecution leave.

Sasuke kept his eyes stealthily glued on Naruto the entire time the teenagers were spewing their bile while pretending he wasn’t there, unable to look away from his friends profile in this heartbreaking moment. At one point in their tirade against him, Naruto's hands froze as he stared empty eyed down at his now slightly diminished mountain of food, chopsticks halting from their formerly rapid pace of shoving food into his mouth before the mean spirited young men had arrived. In that moment a faint flash of emotion came across Naruto's face and then was gone in an instant as Naruto hid it away and went back to eating his food pretending as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

But despite Naruto's efforts to dispel it, Sasuke had seen that flicker of emotion. His eyes were well adjusted to paying attention to the finest, tiniest of details, even without his sight enhancing Sharingan active. It was a brief glimpse, only a small second that it showed on his face before Naruto masked it away, but Sasuke definitely saw it: hurt. Sadness. Deep and unyielding loneliness. The emotions Sasuke knew must have been deeply rooted in Naruto’s heart, but those same which he tried to hide the most. They weren't secret to Sasuke, though. He understood Naruto well enough to see through the mask he put up. Besides, Sasuke had his own experience with hiding his own most deeply rooted and bitter feelings. He could see them plainly in Naruto despite the blond’s efforts to hide them away, so perhaps Naruto could clearly see those feelings in Sasuke as well. Maybe the reason they acted the way the way they did with each other was because they inherently understood each other's feelings without having to try all that hard.

 _This happens all the time to you wherever you go, doesn’t it? When people aren’t ignoring you completely they're being pointlessly awful to you,_ Sasuke thought sullenly, a rare honestly and completely considerate look in his eyes as he secretly watched Naruto continue to eat from out of the corner of his eye. Naruto had never done anything so bad as to warrant this kind of needlessly cruel treatment. Why did people go out of their way just to make a young boy feel even worse about himself than he already did? Why couldn’t anyone just be nice to him even once? _...I should say something to him._ But no matter how much he thought, Sasuke couldn’t come up with any comforting words to say to Naruto. What could he possibly say that wouldn’t end up sounding patronizing, sarcastic, or hollow? Just say something! he insisted to himself, certain that saying anything even the least bit encouraging would have been better than staying silent, but the moment of opportunity to engage quickly passed him by and Naruto went back to eating his ramen, albeit a little less enthusiastically. If Sasuke said anything now it would have just sounded awkward and not at all real and truly meant. He could have spoken up during the teens tirade, told them to go to hell, or he could have said something reassuring to Naruto, but it was too late now. Sasuke just had no idea how to properly interact with people anymore even if he wanted to; he’d spent far too long entirely focused on himself to remember how to function as a normal person. He could barely even remember what it felt like to support someone in a true, heartfelt way and not the sarcastic bickering back and forth that he and Naruto had. _You coward,_ Sasuke berated himself, disgusted with his own inaction and cowardice when even a few meaningful words could have made a huge difference to someone close to him.

The insipid words spewing from those teens’ mouths reminded Sasuke of the loud, harsh whispers he had heard so often after his family had been destroyed. ‘Poor boy’ they would say, or ‘How sad for him’ and so on, while they gossiped on like obnoxious chattering birds as if the death of his whole clan was merely another big topic of the day to prattle on about. Sasuke did his best to ignore it as useless banter from outsiders who knew nothing of his circumstances, but… keeping a strong face had been so terribly hard. He put on a brave face, the mask of the last of the Uchiha, talented and strong willed and brave and determined. But inside he felt was none of those things. He might have seemed strong, seemed like he was doing okay to others, but on the inside Sasuke was breaking under the weight. Their incessant stares, their pitying eyes and meaningless platitudes only accentuated his pressing feeling of isolation further. He wanted to scream out, to make everyone know that he was alright and their idiotic attention wasn’t necessary. But he hadn’t been alright. Nothing about it had been alright.

For an unknown number of days he could no longer remember after the massacre, Sasuke refused to allow himself to fall asleep, terrified that Itachi would suddenly change his mind for some reason and come back to finish off Sasuke as well and fully complete his familial genocide. So the petrified boy sat in his house of horrors, waiting for the death he believed to be coming. Trembling, sobbing, completely alone inside his worst nightmare come true. He ate nothing and drank only water for over a week; not even the smallest amount of food would stay in his stomach for very long. Even light foods were expelled from his body quickly.

As the weeks passed by Sasuke began to eat once again, but only the barest amount of food each day, the little food that would remain in his body as the shock and terror of the events slowly wore off, but still he ate only the amount of food needed to keep himself alive and no more. Sasuke thus lost much weight over a short time span, becoming emaciated and rail like. He grew weak and sick, convinced he was going to die, that Itachi wouldn’t need to come back to kill him since we was going to die soon anyways.

But soon Sasuke had an epiphany: his family could be avenged. He could be the one to bear their grudge and he could act as the righteous sword of vengeance to bring Itachi down for his most heinous and hurtful of betrayals. So it was that Sasuke realized if he was going to survive to carry out that plan then he had to change. If he kept up his current pace he would surely die. He wouldn't do that. There was no way in hell that Sasuke was going to let Itachi have that satisfaction. He wasn’t going to roll over and die. No, Itachi would be the one who would die!

So Sasuke swore to himself. That one day he would hunt down that betrayer and make him suffer for what he had done. And with time Sasuke regained his strength and his courage, more so in fact. He began to push himself far beyond anything he had ever done before, beyond what his assertive father had expected of him, beyond what he was expected to know as a proud Uchiha. From that moment on Sasuke pushed himself to the brink studying, training, casting off anything unnecessary to his vengeance, preparing for the day when he would perform his duty as the embodiment of the Uchiha clan’s honor, vengeance, and anger.

But being around Naruto dug up many of those buried feelings, awakened them from their long slumber in the grave of his heart. The two of them were very different, that was true, with their own separate pains, personalities, pasts, and beliefs, but the more Sasuke looked at him, the more he thought that he and Naruto were far more alike than he ever would have wanted to admit, like mirror images of each other; they were similar but not the same, two sides of the same coin. Maybe that was why Sasuke felt oddly at ease when he was with Naruto, even when the noisy ninja was yelling at him or challenging him.

Sasuke had been so deep in his tumultuous thoughts of the past that he hadn’t even noticed that Naruto had stood up from his stool and performed a jutsu. It took him a shamefully long time to realize there were two Narutos standing next to him, one obviously being a shadow clone. The two Narutos sneakily glanced outside the stand entrance to make sure the teens that had badmouthed him–or them as it were–were still there. The young men indeed still stood just outside the door, impatiently awaiting Naruto’s departure, too busy chatting all the while to notice they were being spied on.

One of the Narutos gave the other a thumbs up accompanied by a wide grin, and number two responded with an emphatic nod. That Naruto used the Transformation Jutsu and vanished into thin air… no wait. Sasuke raised his eyebrow in amused confusion once he looked down to find that this Naruto had turned himself into a tiny grey mouse.

The Naruto mouse scampered out the doorway, presumably headed towards the teens. Was he really going to scare them with a mouse? _What a lame plan_ , Sasuke thought, somewhat disappointed; Naruto was supposed to be a much better trickster than this. As if two boys of that age would be startled by a little rodent and run away screaming in terror. But much to his confusion the mouse returned inside after a few minutes, crawling up the remaining Naruto’s leg and hopping into his open palm.

“Did you do it?” Naruto asked the mouse. It let out an excited high pitched squeal in response. “Good job, thanks,” he smiled expectantly at the grey furred creature before it disappeared in a tiny poof of smoke.

“Hey, old man, can I take the rest of this home with me?” Naruto called out to the chef, motioning at his to his still half full fifth bowl of ramen.

“Sure, Naruto, anything for my best customer,” the chef openly smiled back at him, a reaction few people had when glancing Naruto. “Just bring the bowl back tomorrow like usual.” Sasuke was sure to make a mental note that the ramen shop owner was a good man, silently approving him for his kind treatment of Naruto.

“Ready to leave?” Naruto asked Sasuke with a poker face, not revealing his hand even to Sasuke.

“...Sure,” Sasuke replied, still confused what Naruto had needed the mouse for. There were a number of things Naruto excelled ahead of Sasuke at, among them being loud, stuffing his face, and playing pranks. Naruto was pretty infamous across town as a trickster known for his vicious practical jokes. From the rumor mill Sasuke inevitably overheard while walking through the village he knew that Naruto could even be quite creative in the application of his pranks sometimes. If only he put that much effort into training, Sasuke thought with a deep inner sigh. Though, when he thought about it, that imagination did noticeably carry over into battle; Naruto thought on the fly, coming up with plans in the midst of battle as he learned more about his enemies movements and techniques. Sasuke was almost jealous of that ability of his. Almost. It took a special kind of idiot to charge into battle without a plan, hoping to come up with something as the battle went on.

Naruto walked confidently through the curtains hanging over the doorway of the shop, followed by Sasuke. He had the bowl of unfinished ramen cradled in his hands like something very precious.

“Finally he’s leaving,” the tall blond teen mutter angrily, but still spoke it loud enough so that Naruto could hear.

“Yeah, I thought I was gonna die of old age before we got to go in!” his brown haired friend confirmed their impatient irritation.

Sasuke could only watch in amazement as the next events seemed to play out in slow motion before his eyes. The two teens walked headlong at Naruto while moving for the entryway of Ichiraku Ramen, both them and Naruto refusing to leave their shared path, similar to two cars playing chicken, seeing who would chicken out first and get out of the way. But Sasuke knew Naruto was far too stubborn to be the one to move; the teens would likely shove him out of their path if he didn’t get out of their way. Sasuke was about to drag him by his collar to safety when he saw Naruto grin slightly at the two bullies, a fake, vicious smile full of suppressed anger. That was when it happened: on his next step forward Naruto tripped over his own feet. No… he made himself trip. He was doing this on purpose. Naruto stumbled forward a few steps towards the teens, who froze in place in surprise. The half full bowl of ramen flew out of Naruto’s hands up into the air, seemingly floating for just an instant before it came flying back down to earth. The bowl tipped upside down in the air as it flew over the short brown haired young man, spilling its contents onto his head. A medley of noodles and pork and broth rained down on him, some of the meal landing in his hair or resting on his shoulders.

“You little shit…” brown hair steamed, a powder keg ready to explode, while his buddy glared on.

“Whoops. Oh, I’m so sorry,” Naruto replied with blatantly false sympathy, smirking at the ramen covered teen.

Brownie, not taking any more abuse from this smart ass little prankster, made a move to swipe at Naruto, but Naruto jumped back and it was now the brown haired boys turn to trip on his own feet as he stepped forward for a second strike. He came plummeting to the ground with a crash like a falling tree.

Sasuke took a quick glance downward, confused as to what had just happened. He spotted the problem immediately; the brown haired teens shoelaces were tied together in knots. A grey splotch of fur darted from his collapsed form to the blonde teens feet, whose own shoelaces were untied. It was then that Sasuke finally understood Naruto’s plan for comeuppance against these two: the mouse had been sent out before as a scout to untie their shoelaces while they were too busy talking. Then once Naruto left the building the mouse appeared again while the ramen bowl was soaring through the air, the boys once again too distracted to pay attention to their feet. The mouse had tied brownies shoelaces together while he was busy being soaked by ramen. The little grey creature ran over to the fallen boys friend and grabbed blondie's laces, rapidly working them in his tiny hands, knotting them together before disappearing with another puff of smoke, his mission of vengeance now complete.

“You’re gonna regret that!” blondie shouted, attempting to defend his friends honor, before falling flat on his face into the dirt, tangled up by his own shoe predicament. “Whoah! What the-?” He looked down at his feet in disbelief.

“HAHAHAHA!” Naruto burst out laughing at the comical scene before him. “Take that, stuuuuuuupid!” he taunted his foes, sticking out his tongue at the irate teenagers.

“You’re dead when we get our hands on you, you hear me?!” brownie screamed out in impotent rage, fiddling with his laces so he could beat the snot out of Naruto for making them look like fools, mind too clouded with anger to realize he could just take off his shows.

“C’mon, Sasuke! Let’s run!” Naruto said as he turned around, looking at Sasuke with a toothy grin. He gripped Sasuke’s wrist tightly, tugging him along and urging him to run along with him before the two teens could remove their shoes. “See ya, bastards!” Naruto shouted as he bolted off from the scene of his crime, Sasuke in tow.

***

The pair sprinted away from Ichiraku Ramen for about 10 blocks before they finally slowed their pace down, Naruto grasping at Sasuke’s wrist and pulling him along behind himself the whole time. Once they had reached this distance Naruto must have decided it was now safe because he suddenly let go of Sasuke’s arm in one quick, almost shy motion. “Heh heh heh, that was a good one,” he chuckled, more congratulating himself for a successful prank than informing Sasuke.

Sasuke continued to study Naruto’s face as he had done in the ramen shop, mulling over the boy's actions. _You play pranks on people because you're sick of being ignored. They don't want to deal with you or bother noticing you, so you force them to with the only way you know how. The truth is... you're actuality really lonely, aren't you Naruto?_

“What’s wrong, do I have something on my face?” Naruto questioned, noticing Sasuke’s interest in him.

“No, I was just thinking how you wouldn’t be so much of a loser if you tried that hard with everything is all,” he half lied in response.

“Ah, you bastard! That was funny! You just have no sense of humor,” Naruto said, offended at Sasuke’s lack of enjoyment of his prank.

“I didn't say it wasn’t funny, I just said you were an idiot for not trying hard all the time.” Truth be told, Sasuke did find that act kind of amusing. Not as funny as Naruto did, of course, but he wasn’t exactly the jokes and pranks type of guy.

“...Just for that, I’m kicking your ass double hard in the Chunin Exams!” Naruto proclaimed.

“Yeah? What are you going to do, put tacks in my shoes? Spread itching powder on my clothes?” he said with an emphatic scoff. Though to be honest, part of him was paranoid that he would have to watch his back from now on; with Naruto’s creative mind and their head to head relationship, Sasuke was a little worried that he might find himself on the end of a few nasty practical jokes in the near future.

“You are such a bastard!” Naruto yelled out, annoyed at not being taken seriously by Sasuke.

“You’re being too noisy, loser,” he simply replied, but his slight smile belied the fact that for once in his life he was actually having a good time.

They walked along together for a while, playfully insulting each other and trying to psych each other out before the upcoming contest, both talking up how powerful they had become since they had last met.

After a few more blocks of the almost friendly banter Sasuke turned to leave to go home for a night of rest before another day of more training tomorrow. It had been a long time since Sasuke had visited his house and for some reason today Naruto desired him there now more than ever. He talked a big game, but he was extremely nervous about the Chunin Exam finals, his stomach doing flip flops all day. His pointless conversations with Sasuke followed by their shared meal had cheered him up considerably, but... He was worried that Sasuke would berate him for bringing up their late night routine or outright refuse his offer, but Naruto wanted some more time with Sasuke to calm his nerves. Whenever he was around the cocky bastard he found himself strangely empowered. He was happier, felt his doubt blasted away, felt that maybe if things continued like this that he could be real friends with Sasuke some day. Overall Sasuke’s presence comforted him, something Naruto could use very much right now. If he was alone that worry, that corroding doubt would start to seep back in. For a short while with Sasuke this evening Naruto had forgotten his troubles. He didn’t want to be plunged back into reality just yet.

As Sasuke turned to part ways with him, Naruto gulped down his fear and stretched out his hand, grabbing hold of Sasuke’s wrist once again, but this time for a completely different reason than before. “Uh… w-w-would you… come over to my house tonight? If you have time, I mean…” he stuttered out nervously.

Sasuke took a long serious glance at Naruto, as if studying his intentions. His face burned red all the way up to his ears and he avoided looking Sasuke in the eyes, maybe for fear of being shunned or rejected. It must have been extremely embarrassing of him to ask anything of Sasuke, let alone something as intimate as this. Naruto’s hand remained gently but firmly grasped around Sasuke’s wrist the whole time, as if silently pleading with him to come over to participate in the secret ritual they shared.

“...Okay,” Sasuke replied after an awkward long silence with a single affirmative nod. Naruto looked up at Sasuke momentarily shocked, but a minuscule smile formed on his face as he loosened his grip around Sasuke’s arm, but still didn’t let go completely, pulling him gently to his apartment.

***

For the first time in a long while Sasuke was back in Naruto’s room. The place was still a pigsty, old empty ramen cups stacked precariously in the trash and dirty clothes and other litter spread out on the floor. The piece of paper defiantly proclaiming the words ‘Defeat Sasuke!’ in big bold letters still hung tacked to the wall. It was pretty much the same as it always had been. The one difference Sasuke could notice was the scent; this place smelled of Naruto. That wasn’t to say he stank, it was simply the flowing unique individual aroma of the pubescent boy clinging to his bed, his clothes, his body. Sasuke had never noticed the smell before when he snuck away at night to come here, but perhaps he just was already used to it by that time and the past month without Naruto had made his scent an unfamiliar thing now. It smelled slightly of sweat and musk underlied by the fresh, clean smell of soap. Somehow, it reminded him of rivalry, of strength, of friendship; it was a good smell. _...I just thought of something very strange_ , Sasuke remarked to himself. Despite that thought, however, he took in a deep whiff of Naruto’s natural aroma as they kissed.

Their lips came together again and again, lightly scraping against each other in repeated pecks, never touching for more than a few seconds at a time. Naruto was worried that any overeager actions would cause Sasuke to get angry with him and flee once again. That was the last thing he wanted right now; he needed this time where he didn’t have to worry about the Chunin Exams or being constantly judged by everyone he passed on the street, hearing them doubt him and trash talk him. Naruto just wanted to feel comfortable and happy right now. He had missed this softness, this feeling of connection with Sasuke. It felt good to once again feel Sasuke’s plump lips pressed up against his own.

Sasuke unexpectedly took the initiative to further their actions, wrapping his arms around Naruto and nestling them gently in the small of his back. Naruto followed in kind, tying them both together. Their kissing became slightly more passionate, each kiss lasting a tiny bit longer than the one before it had until finally they no longer backed away but remained in one exceptionally long smooch, their lips locked together. Sasuke pulled Naruto closer to himself, further entangling their bodies as they kissed. Naruto responded by scooching closer to Sasuke who again pulled Naruto closer to him until they were now resting lip to lip and chest to chest.

Sasuke’s hands abandoned their positions in the small of Naruto’s back and wrapped completely around him, drawing Naruto into a complete hug, the first real one Naruto could remember ever getting in his life. Emotion welled within the blond boy; what they were doing would probably have been called wrong, but it just felt so weirdly good and right that it made him unbelievably happy. It was a kind of warmth and kindness Naruto had never experienced before and certainly never had expected he would have received from Sasuke. The act might have been nothing to Sasuke, only a simple hug, but the significance to Naruto was massive. He had no idea how to show his appreciation except only to do the same thing in return. His own hands also left Sasuke’s lower back and tightly hugged him back as their lips never stopped touching all the while.

What Naruto didn’t know though, was that Sasuke vastly appreciated the return of his gesture. Even he hurt inside sometimes. Even the great Sasuke Uchiha got lonely and desired comfort at times. For many years now he had no one to tell when he was sad or afraid, no one to support him and tell him things would be okay. Growing up alone had left him very bitter towards other people’s happiness. They had what he had been robbed of. So it didn’t anger him or hurt his pride when Naruto, who understood the same pain, held him tightly to his own chest. This was the first time since the loss of his family that Sasuke truly felt that someone else in the world cared about him, even if it was in this completely unusual way.

The two love starved boys cradled each other in their arms, the sounds of their thundering heartbeats and quick breaths through their noses resonating together as they intertwined their bodies, each pressing up to the chest of the other. Both of them could feel the rapid thumps in each others chest, expressing their excitement, their worry, their hidden pain.

Without breaking their embrace or their kiss Sasuke rose to his knees, followed in suit by Naruto. They now both stood on their knees on top of Naruto’s bed, not just their chests pressed together anymore, but their entire bodies mashed together in a tight full body hug. That was when Sasuke noticed it; something hard poking against his leg. It took Sasuke a moment to register that it was Naruto’s boner grinding against him needily. Even though they were both wearing all their clothes Sasuke would feel just how stiff it was as it moved back and forth against his pant leg in desperation. After realizing just what was going on Sasuke all at once broke their amazingly long kiss, withdrew his arms from around Naruto, and pushed him back onto the bed.

“Wait! Sasuke I didn’t-” Naruto tried to explain before being interrupted.

“Shut up,” Sasuke interrupted him somewhat forcefully and stern. This was going all wrong again! Once again Naruto’s dick had gotten him in trouble by making him push things too far too quick. But much to his amazement, Sasuke didn’t shout angrily at him and storm out the door. Quite the opposite; when Naruto looked up at him confused, he noticed Sasuke staring back down at him with a haze of lust taken over his features. He looked like he wanted to devour Naruto whole.

Sasuke fearlessly reached out his hand and cupped it over Naruto’s crotch, staring him directly in the eyes all the while. The black haired boy began massaging and rubbing Naruto’s dick through his pants. “Nng!” Naruto quietly moaned in surprise, not expecting Sasuke’s forwardness. He groped and fondled at Naruto’s package, mostly focusing on his throbbing length, but occasionally he moved downward to press the palm of his hand against the outline of the panting blond boy’s testicles and gently rolled the fragile eggs in his hand.

Sasuke might have been trying very hard to pretend that this was no big deal, that this was just a normal evolution of their strangely intimate physical relationship, but nothing about this situation was anywhere close to normal. In normal circumstances guys didn’t make out with each other, they didn’t jerk each other off, they didn’t get as physically and intimately close as Naruto and Sasuke were now, certainly not when they hated each other as much as they both proclaimed to. Sasuke tried to assure himself that he was completely in control of himself, that his emotions were in check, but that was a blatant lie he told to comfort himself; his rock hard erection throbbing unattended to in his pants betrayed his bewildering sexual excitement. The sight of Naruto trying to hold back grunts of pleasure as Sasuke touched his junk, that confused but desiring face Naruto wore as Sasuke gazed down on him awoke a fiery lust deep inside Sasuke the likes of which he had never felt before. The semi hard erection he had been sporting during their make out session grew quickly to full mast as he carefully watched Naruto squirm and moan while Sasuke pleasured him.

Of course Sasuke had gotten inconvenient boners out of nowhere on occasion–embarrassingly enough, sometimes even when on missions and in class back at the Academy–and there were times when he awoke early in the morning to find a sticky mess left behind in his trousers after a wet dream–after all he was a growing boy subject to the changes of puberty like any other–but never had Sasuke been this painfully aroused before. Most of the time whenever Sasuke felt that need rise up he ignored it and went off to train in order to subdue his passions; he had no time to focus on his burgeoning sexual desire when every second of his time counted towards his life’s goal. Even then, there were times when his annoying erections just wouldn't leave, so he had no choice but to take care of them. It wasn’t a thing he enjoyed all that much; it made him feel like he was being controlled by his petty whims. It happened very rarely and he expected he masturbated far less than the typical boy his age, something he was proud of in fact; others were slaves to their baser natures, he was above that kind of thing except on all but a few occasions, perhaps once a month or so when his loins demanded they be ignored no longer.

But this... This kind of all consuming, frustrating lust he was feeling right now was an entirely new sensation to Sasuke. It wasn’t annoying like the other kind of feeling either. This was actually enjoyable. Sasuke made a mental note not to get hooked on this incredible feeling; this could very easily get addictive. But his lust addled brain quickly forgot the recommendation and tossed it out. Right now he wanted more and more of it and he wanted to give more of this feeling to Naruto as well.

“Naruto… touch me too,” Sasuke was surprised to hear himself say. Naruto complied almost immediately, eagerly returning the favor Sasuke was providing for him. They sat in silence staring at each other as they rubbed each other's bulges carefully but deliberately, fondling each other's raging hard erections hidden beneath their pants.

Suddenly getting bold, Naruto took the zipper to Sasuke’s pants in between his fingers and slowly slid it down. He looked up questioningly at Sasuke to see if his current course was alright with him, but the black haired boy showed no signs that he was going to stop Naruto’s actions, so he reached his hand in and took firm hold of Sasuke's cock and pulled it out of his fly hole. The foreskin was retracted back almost all the way, exposing the pink tip which drooled a tiny stream of pre-cum. Naruto slid his hand back and forth slowly along Sasuke’s length, giving it a few shallow tugs while he continued to stare Sasuke in the eyes. Only now did Naruto notice a small but growing wet patch in his own underwear as his penis excitedly leaked pre-cum out, creating an uncomfortable moist sensation in his pants.

“Hey, Sasuke… Let’s take our clothes off,” Naruto half asked, half begged. Sasuke readily agreed to that proposal with a single definitive nod.

The boys watched each other hungrily as they stripped off their clothes in a hurry to leave themselves completely bare for the other to see for the first time since the mission to the Land of Waves–but only Naruto had been paying close attention to Sasuke’s physique back then. Now Sasuke got a chance of his own to closely ogle the blond in return. Sasuke noted to himself that Naruto seemed a little more toned and muscular than he last remembered. Perhaps all that training had done him some good after all; he honestly looked like he was stronger. Naruto, who had always had a somewhat young, baby faced look about him that was only accentuated by his childish attitude, looked older and more mature in this instance. It seemed he had even grown a bit taller too, but he still was a shrimp next to Sasuke.

The two horny boys slowly stroked themselves as they eyed each other, both unknowing of just what to do next and both too timid to make any more brash moves just yet.

It was Naruto who finally worked up the courage to make the next aggressive move in their sexual game. “I have an idea. How about we put them close together and see who’s is bigger,” he suggested with a sly smile, pointing down as his rigid member.

“You’re on,” Sasuke replied confidently.

The boys walked close up to each other, erect cocks in hand, until they were standing about three inches apart. From a quick glance Sasuke was bigger, but no, that wasn’t close enough though for them. They both took another small but bold step forward. Two inches, but still not close enough. They stepped forward again, their members now only had an inch of empty space apart between them. It still wasn’t close enough; if they were going to figure out who was truly bigger they needed to know by exactly how much. Eyeing it wasn’t enough, they needed the closest measurement they could possibly get. They paused a moment to take an affirming look at each other in the face, making sure this last movement was okay with the other, before they took that final last doozy of a step forward, removing their hands from their genitals and pressing their cocks together. They were as close now as they could possibly get, their entire lower bodies pressed together; any more and they would be standing on top of each other. Naruto and Sasuke’s penises proudly jutted upward from their groins, lined up against each other, touching shaft to shaft and head to head. Their ball sacks lined up as well, the handful of hairs on Sasuke’s scrotum ticking Naruto’s in an unfamiliar but strangely pleasant sensation.

Naruto’s face heated up in embarrassment and excitement. He was standing here with his rival/friend Sasuke Uchiha, the same boy who irritated him to no end and drove him to work so hard, with their most intimate and sensitive parts pressed together. He shyly looked to the side in uncharacteristic modesty, afraid of meeting Sasuke's eyes in this strange situation but also scared of looking down at the undeniably intimate act they were committing. Even though his loins were burning with heat Naruto could feel the warmth pouring off of Sasuke's own junk as it throbbed along with his accelerated heartbeat, thump thump thump. Sasuke must have been feeling the same sensation, Naruto's member pulsing against his own, because his pale face was stained with a large splotch of pink blush as well.

“Heh. Looks like I’m longer than you,” Sasuke gloated with a satisfied grin on his face. Naruto, who had been avoiding looking at their two dicks nestled beside each other out of an overload of embarrassment–despite him being the one to suggest this–took a quick look downwards in disbelief. It was true; even after the months that had passed since Naruto had first seen his penis in the bathtub at Tazuna’s house in the Land of Waves, Sasuke still was longer than he was. Naruto had noticed that his own penis had gotten a bit longer over that span of time so he had secretly hoped that he had outclassed Sasuke by now, but sadly his length had grown as well. Naruto was now about 3.9 inches long when erect, but Sasuke was around 4.2 inches long these days. The comparison wasn’t completely equal however; thinking back to his impressive 4 inches back then in the tub, Naruto figured that Sasuke was definitely a shower, a guy who didn’t have much difference between his flaccid and erect lengths, while Naruto himself was a grower, a guy who had a measurable difference between his hard length and soft length. The difference between them was small but important to Naruto; oh, how he wished he could have beaten him!

“Shut up! Well... Mine’s thicker than yours is!” Naruto said defensively, pointing out his girthier size compared to Sasuke’s thinner length. Sasuke shrugged as if to feign interest but a momentary flash of jealousy appeared on his face, healing Naruto's ego slightly. “Plus, you’re a little older than I am. Give it time and mine will be waaaay bigger than yours!”

“Well, then when you get bigger let me know and we can check again. But until then, I win dummy.”

To them this was just another form of competition, another challenge to either be won or lost. It was a strange form of competition, especially considering just how much they proclaimed to dislike each other, but perhaps not as unnatural an evolution as they had first believed. Passionate feelings, both positive and negative, could manifest themselves in a number of odd and unusual ways.

Naruto moved his penis up, rubbing the sensitive pink tip against Sasuke’s, sending a large bead of clear pre leaking out of Sasuke’s urethra and trickling down on to Naruto’s cock head. “Heh, it’s like our penises are kissing,” Naruto remarked childishly as the tips of their cocks glided together and they exchanged pre-cum between them like the swapping of spit during a french kiss.

“Don’t say something so weird you freaking idiot!” Sasuke exclaimed, Naruto’s dumb comment threatening to kill the mood for him. He restored the order by suddenly grasping at the two cocks in one hand and began masturbating them together.

“Ah!” Naruto let out a high pitched moan in surprise of his partners sudden action. Streams of pre dripped out both of their rigid members, lubricating them as they rubbed together in Sasuke’s slow fist.

Naruto and Sasuke began bucking their hips together, grinding dick against dick as Sasuke worked their cocks in his hand, which started moving at an agonizingly slow pace as he dragged his hand over them at first, but gradually worked his way up into a steady pace. It was the most incredible feeling ever to Naruto. Even their mutual masturbation session in the Forest of Death had nothing on the sheer intensity and passion as they frotted their cocks, humping their loins together in frantic lust.

But that wasn’t all; Sasuke quickly jammed his lips against Naruto’s, plundering Naruto’s mouth with his tongue, who was too surprised to mount a defense. Even if he had, he would have gave in without much of a fight. This kiss was entirely unlike their previous kisses in the day, the sweet chaste pecks on the lips that started this whole thing and the passionate, deliberately long passionate lip lock that followed. This kiss was wild and sloppy and domineering as Sasuke ravaged Naruto’s mouth with his tongue, roughly exploring his mouth. Naruto and Sasuke dueled each other both with their tongues fighting and wriggling in their mouths and with their cocks scraping and dragging against each other as they fought to see which one of them would allow himself to be submit completely to pleasure first.

Sasuke began to slow his movements down without warning and withdrew his tongue from Naruto's mouth, a long strand of saliva forming between their mouths until it broke. He removed his hand from their dicks, causing Naruto to softly whine in disappointment. But Sasuke had something else in mind; Sasuke wanted to inflame his passions even more than they already were. He wanted... “Naruto… can I do more?” Sasuke asked in a hoarse whisper.

“More?” Naruto questioned, panting just as heavily as he would after a difficult battle.

“...I want to put it in you,” Sasuke said after contemplating a moment. He was trying to think of a way to say it so it wouldn’t sound as bad, but Naruto was pretty dense sometimes, so perhaps it was better to just be out and say it plainly.

“Inside me?” Naruto questioned once again. He was utterly confused. He knew how sex was supposed to work between a guy and a girl–he wasn’t a little kid anymore after all. He had never tried it–or even kissed a girl sadly–but he knew the basics of how sex worked. But when it came to this he was in the dark. Just where could you stick it in with another guy? What more was there to do between two men? Unless Sasuke meant he wanted to put it in his… Naruto’s eyes flew open wide in shock as he realized just what Sasuke had mean with his words.

“No, no, no, no, no! No way!” Naruto exclaimed animatedly, crossing his hands into a big X as if to further illustrate his objection. This was already screwed up enough as it was. Doing THAT was just plain wrong! What kind of person would put it in THERE of all places? It was just plain gross and it would definitely hurt and no no no way in hell was Naruto going to let that happen to him!

“That’s how guys do it,” Sasuke replied calmly, not pressing the point, but not entirely willing to let it drop either in his lust fueled state.

“How would you know? Have you done it with another guy before?” Naruto questioned quickly narrowing his eyes, suddenly suspicious.

“Of course not!” Sasuke shouted back defensively.

“Then how do you know?!” Naruto demanded answers with an irritated look.

“I just… know, okay?” Sasuke maneuvered evasively. He could remember that sometimes when he was young of having snuck into his elder brothers room to snoop around–like all good little brothers did–while Itachi was away on missions and finding a couple of dirty magazines that were particularly well hidden behind some ninja manuals on his bookshelf. The magazines all showed a variety of different kinds of men, muscular men, skinny men, young men, middle aged men, tall men, short men, all of them doing lewd acts with each other, putting their ‘things’ in each others mouths or their rears. It was an incredibly exciting thing to stumble upon this forbidden treasure trove. He had been too young to understand exactly the significance of these acts and too young to get aroused by them, but even back then Sasuke understood enough about sex to find them to be irresistibly forbidden and tantalizing. He gained quite a lot of information about sex–or gay sex at least–from his elder brother’s porno stash as he peeked at them from time to time when Itachi was out. Of course he’d never admit that to Naruto; it was better to let the blond think he was a prodigy at this as well than to admit the embarrassing truth that he pilfered porn from his older brother’s stash.

Naruto sat with his arms crossed, completely unconvinced and unwilling to change his opinion on the matter.

“Oh, I get it. You're scared. You got one look at my size and you were too frightened to do anything else,” Sasuke mocked him.

“What was that?!” Naruto shouted, offended at the insinuation he was afraid of anything, even the thought of Sasuke's penis pushing into his most private place. “Wait a minute, why do you get to put it in me? Why can’t I put it in you?!” he continued to shout, realizing the unfair advantage Sasuke had on this topic.

“You’re just being a scaredy-cat again. Besides, I asked first. You snooze you loose,” Sasuke said unsympathetically as he shrugged his shoulders.

“That’s not fair! I didn't even know two guys could do this!” Naruto pouted.

Sasuke sighed, deciding to let Naruto have the argument for just once. “Fine, we'll play rock paper scissors. Winner gets to be top.”

Of course, Sasuke stacked the deck in his favor, so to speak. He knew Naruto always had a preferred bias for scissors and used it far too much, so Sasuke easily won. True, he may have cheated, but it wasn’t out of any ill intentions; if Naruto went at him with that unlimited energy of his Sasuke knew he would probably break. Even though his only knowledge about this was from dirty mags and he had no real practical applications of his knowledge, he still knew more about this than Naruto did. Better to let him bottom now and learn how to do it right than let him top right away and break Sasuke’s ass.

“You sure you wanna do this? If you wanna chicken out, now’s the time.”

“Go to hell, Sasuke! You won. I never go back on my word,” Naruto affirmed somewhat irritated at his loss. _I’ll force you to recognize me, Sasuke! I’m not some kid you can make fun of just because you’re a tiny bit bigger than I am. I’ll let you do it to me and I’ll make you feel so damn good that you’ll cry out my name!_

“Alright. Lay on your back and spread your legs open wide,” he ordered Naruto, who blushed in embarrassment at the suggestion but still did as he was told, leaving his virgin hole in plain view for Sasuke. His eyes were shut tight and his ass clenched probably even tighter as he held his thighs up in his hands.

“You need to relax, stupid. I can’t put anything in when you’re tightened up like this,” Sasuke said, knowing at a glance that Naruto’s fearful anticipation to be penetrated would prevent any possible entry.

“That’s easier said than done, jackass! Cut me some slack here, will ya?!” Naruto shouted in anger. He was laying on his back with his asshole out on display and his legs splayed up in the air; what more did the bastard want from him?!

Sasuke sighed, somewhat annoyed at the inconvenience, but he hadn’t expected this to exactly be an easy task in any case. He laid his nude body gently on top of Naruto’s, pinning him down, and kissed lightly him on the cheek.

“What are you doing?” Naruto asked suspiciously. They had only ever kissed on the lips, kissing on the cheek seemed a little too lovey dovey of a thing for them to do.

“Getting you to relax, so just shut up,” Sasuke said, laying down another kiss on the cheek, and then another onto Naruto’s jaw. He then moved on to Naruto’s neck, sucking gently as he kissed the tender flesh, causing Naruto to draw in a quick short breath in surprise.

Sasuke continued kissing his way down Naruto’s body, planting a trail of kisses across his chest, on his collar bone, then his abs, and finally directly on his pert nipples. More and more Sasuke planted moist kisses across Naruto’s torso, practically smothering him with their amount. He moved farther down and down until Sasuke reached it; the seal that held back the Nine Tails, the thing that forever marked Naruto as ‘different’, as ‘other’. The thing that secretly made him feel so much shame and anguish. Here Sasuke’s lips retreated from Naruto’s body.

Sasuke stared down silently at the ornate seal ringing around Naruto’s belly button, the heavy scrutiny being given causing Naruto to shift uncomfortably as if trying to flee Sasuke’s eyes. He never liked to show off the mark, felt it to be a burdensome thing. Few had ever seen the seal, but with Sasuke gazing at it so intently a nervous tension began to rise in Naruto. _What if he thinks it’s weird? Or gross?_ He was used to people reacting to his whisker marks on his face–or as some called them, his ‘demon marks’–and his seal mark too, on the rare occasions when he had no choice but to display it. Naruto remembered the occasions when he went to the public baths and the old men and young boys alike would gape at the strange seal and whisper about it’s meaning, preventing him from having the relaxing soak he wanted. He saw the way their faces looked at him, like he was tainted and disgusting. The thought of Sasuke looking at him the same way frightened Naruto. Strangers treating him poorly was bad enough, but if even Sasuke turned against him then just who in the world would treat him as an equal?

But Sasuke didn’t call him a monster or say it was gross or scary or anything of the sort. Sasuke only brought his lips back down and planted a series of gentle, almost loving kisses around the seal, tracing the circle with his lips. The act caused Naruto to begin quietly crying for some reason. It was if Sasuke was silently telling him that he was accepted, regardless of the terrifying beast sealed inside him. Never before in his life had Naruto felt so open and vulnerable with another person, yet Sasuke’s movements brought with them a reassuring sense of understanding and comfort.

“Naruto? What’s wrong?” Sasuke asked, a surprising level of concern appearing on his face as he halted his work to check if everything was okay.

“Nothing. I’m okay, just keep going,” Naruto replied, wiping away his tears with the back of his hand, completely ashamed that he could cry in front of Sasuke of all people in this of all situations.

Sasuke stared at him, unsure of what to do for a moment, but went back to his work of pleasing Naruto after a small nod from the boy. Upon the next kiss, Sasuke extended his tongue into Naruto’s belly, licking the tattoo emblazoned on his body. The warm wet feeling as Sasuke continued to trace the mark with his tongue sent a pleasurable shiver down Naruto’s spine and caused him to gasp loudly.

Naruto’s tense body had slackened and his nerves calmed as he received his multitude of kisses across his body. Sasuke was right about one thing; he certainly felt a lot more relaxed now. Sasuke, noticing this as well, lifted his mouth off of Naruto’s body, ready to get down to business.

“If it hurts too much let me know,” Sasuke told him, again moving to lay on top of him.

“‘Kay,” Naruto replied, smiling to himself. Sasuke was being so patient and gentle with him it almost made his heart melt. Almost. The bitterness and rivalry between them had completely dissipated just for this period of time, leaving behind this single moment of intimacy between the two of them. On the other hand, this sort of treatment of kindness was so unexpectedly unlike Sasuke that Naruto was almost tempted to shout out ‘What have you done with the real Sasuke?!’ It was just such a strange concept to think of the cocky and combative Sasuke caring for his well-being and smothering him with warm affection and gentle kisses that Naruto thought that this had to have been an imposter. The real Sasuke would never do anything like this in a million years.

Sasuke moved his pointer finger to Naruto’s entrance, pushing against the pucker gently as it resisted his entreaties. The unfamiliar feeling of something touching against this place caused Naruto to jolt in surprise. The feeling only become more odd when he felt something begin to drive its way inside of himself. Sasuke found his finger facing resistance as he slowly worked his way inside, despite Naruto’s more relaxed demeanor. He could only make it up the his first knuckle before being forced to a stop.

“Wait, that’s not…” Naruto mumbled, realizing what was happening down there. Sasuke was supposed to be putting in his penis. Even though he couldn’t he could see what was happening Naruto knew what was being pushed into him couldn’t have been Sasuke’s dick based on the size alone. “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR FINGER IN MY ASS?!” Naruto screamed out, the previous gentle, borderline romantic mood blown away in an instant.

“If I don’t loosen you up first it will really hurt!” Sasuke cried out in confusion, momentarily forgetting Naruto was a completely inexperienced cherry boy with no knowledge.

“With your fingers?! You’re just making fun of me, aren’t you?!” Naruto angrily asked, hurt that he had been tricked after all they had done, after all the kindness Sasuke had so uncharacteristically shown him. They had come this far only for Sasuke to make him look like a fool.

“No, I’m serious! Unless you want it to hurt I need to loosen you up with my fingers first,” Sasuke said with a deadly serious face as he tried to convince Naruto of the dangers.

“Grr!” Naruto growled suspiciously as he glared at Sasuke. “Fine! Do whatever, I don’t care!” he yelled, crossing his arms in frustration and shyness. Getting Sasuke’s dick put in his ass was already enough of a difficult thing to emotionally deal with, but somehow he figured that his fingers inside him was even worse to contemplate for some reason.

“...Do you have anything slick?” Sasuke asked, looking around the room for a lubricant. Even after stretching, going in dry for the first time would still be too much for Naruto to handle. Sasuke was not proud of the fact that he knew that, but he did know it.

“Slick? Ummmm… Oh! There should be a healing cream that I got from Hinata over on that table,” Naruto said, pointing out a little unmarked jar with a clearish white goop inside. Sasuke rose off of Naruto and went over to the bedside table, unscrewing the cap to the healing remedy. He stuck his thumb and index finger into the substance and rubbed it between them.

“Yeah, this should work,” Sasuke muttered, confirming the stuff would work for his purposes. He returned to the bed, slathered his index and ring fingers with the cream and returned to his work on Naruto’s ass.

“Ah! Cold!” Naruto shouted as he jumped in surprise as Sasuke grabbed a small handful of the impromptu lube and smothered it across Naruto’s hole.

Sasuke again pressed at the tender pink hole, his lubed up pointer finger slipping inside much easier than before. He began to slowly drag his finger in and out, repeating the process to familiarize Naruto with the sensation, pushing deeper and deeper with every movement.

“Feels… really weird…” Naruto grunted as Sasuke’s digit writhed inside him.

After a few minutes of slow fingering, Sasuke wedged his ring finger against Naruto’s entrance. He gently thrust and the opening gave way, reluctantly allowing him in and causing another loud grunt from Naruto, who lay back in total disbelief of what was happening. With two fingers now inside, Sasuke began to speed up his movements, preparing Naruto for what was to come. He wiggled and moved his fingers around, attempting to stretch out the orifice as much as possible to prevent as much pain as he could.

Finally, after a seemingly endless number of minutes passing by, Sasuke had become satisfied with how loose Naruto had become from his finger fucking and withdrew his fingers from the blond ninja's rear.

“I’m going to put it in now,” he warned his partner, who only nodded and shut his eyes tightly in anticipation. Sasuke placed his cock head, dribbling much more pre than before in barely contained excitement, at Naruto’s entrance and pushed in harder this time; it would take more effort to insert this than just a finger. Naruto winced in pain, but said nothing to stop him, so Sasuke continued until he entered his target with a satisfying pop. He took a moment to allow Naruto to adjust to the pressure of his invading member, and also to admire the sight of the usually loudmouthed boy laying quietly beneath him, pierced by his tool.

Slowly, bit by bit, Sasuke sunk his shaft deeper into Naruto. The feeling was incredible beyond anything he could have ever imagined, even after reading those porno mags of his brothers; the tightness gripping at his dick, the incredible warmth radiating into him. It was almost too much for the senses.

After slowly working his way in Sasuke finally bottomed out, his entire dick now implanted inside Naruto, and he let out a loud contented sigh of pleasure.

“I’m going to move now,” he informed his partner, dragging his cock out until only the head remained inside and then slowly pushing it all back in again. He did this again and again, building up speed as he went, thrusting faster and deeper into Naruto’s cavern, completely taken over by the act. He became delirious with sheer pleasure, rapidly lunging into Naruto as the sound of his hips slapping against Naruto’s ass egging him on even more. Sasuke became completely consumed by his lust.

God did it hurt. That invading thing charging into him over and over left Naruto sorely hurting as it stretched out his most private place. It pulled out and then came slamming back into him, the quick pace of Sasuke’s pumping not giving Naruto a chance to prepare himself. With it came a burning soreness every time Sasuke pulled his cock out and a stinging pain every time it came pounding back inside of him. Naruto was trying to put up with it, to just grit his teeth and bear it, but he could do that no longer. Sasuke’s furious pace, a complete reversal of his gentle ways a little bit ago, only made matters worse. He had to say something.

“Ah! Not so fast, Sasuke! Go easy on me, you bastard! It’s not like I’ve ever done this before!” Naruto cried out in pain, causing Sasuke to reluctantly slow his pace.

“Well neither have I, idiot!” the dark haired boy growled down at Naruto, momentarily angered at the interruption of his almost animalistic breeding as he allowed himself to be overtaken by his throbbing biological imperatives.

 _Really?_ Naruto thought to himself smugly. _I’d always assumed since he was so popular with girls that… Damn, why does that make me so happy?_ The fact that Sasuke was a virgin too made Naruto happy, but the fact that he was Sasuke’s first and Sasuke was his gave Naruto an unusually joyful feeling inside. He had always wanted attention from Sasuke, his efforts to one up him and challenge him a subconscious display of that inner desire. More than anyone else Naruto wanted Sasuke’s approval, Sasuke’s opinion, Sasuke’s attention. This was just another form of that selfish desire to monopolize his teammate.

“...Sorry,” Sasuke muttered after an awkward silence, realizing he was the one in the wrong as he looked down on Naruto’s pain stricken expression; he had told Naruto to let him know if it hurt yet he got mad when the boy interrupted his pleasure. He was bitterly ashamed of himself for getting so wrapped up in his own pleasure, for losing control of himself. “I promise I’ll go slower now,” he assured Naruto.

Naruto almost did a double take after hearing this uncharacteristic apology; he didn’t think ‘sorry’ was a word that was even in Sasuke’s vocabulary. But his expression did look sorely apologetic, so Naruto opted to let him continue. He kept to his word from that point on, slowly rocking his hips back and forth into Naruto as he gently but still passionately continued to fuck Naruto, robbing him of his senses.

 _It looks like it still hurts_ , Sasuke remarked while looking sympathetically at Naruto with his eyes knit tightly together and his frowning mouth slightly open in order to grunt or gasp as Sasuke thrust up inside of him. He didn’t want to hurt his teammate, but he didn’t exactly want to stop either. Surely there had to be something he could do to make Naruto feel more pleasure. _Why are you always like this? Why can’t you ever ask for help? If you asked me to stop now I would. You’re so damn stubborn. Why do you care so much? Why do you want to prove yourself to me so much? I just don’t get it._

“Ngh! Naruto… You’re so tight. It feels really good…” Sasuke grunted and panted as he pistoned into Naruto. He hoped that maybe the dirty compliment work work toward lessening Naruto’s pain, distracting him from it a little bit. It wasn’t as though he was lying either; the experience did feel wonderfully good, like a velvet sheath clasping tightly around his inexperienced cock.

 _Yeah, that’s right! Make lots of noises Sasuke!_ he cheered himself on, oddly proud he had gotten Sasuke to gasp out his name. It hurt, that was true, but something about the act fed Naruto's ego. The fact that he was the one making Sasuke groan in pleasure like this, despite his own pain, meant that he was the one in the dominant position in their relationship. He held the high ground in this contest of passionate wills and Sasuke was whimpering in pure pleasure at his mercy. But damn, did his asshole feel sore. The stinging pain that had come together with the long invader had relented and now become a more manageable dull ache, but the pain reignited every time Sasuke thrust up into him. He couldn’t help but wince. But with every thrust of Sasuke’s dick into his ass Naruto could feel something strange happening to himself. The sensation of being penetrated was starting to actually feel… good. Every time Sasuke pulled out and left Naruto’s opening empty only to return moments later it brought a strangely pleasurable fullness to his hole. It still hurt, but the pain was ebbing away, being replaced over time by the oddly satisfying pressure of his rival’s cock driving into his deepest places.

Sasuke suddenly stopped his thrusting all together, wrapped his arms around Naruto, and hoisted him up onto his lap, shifting from missionary position to a lotus position. The sudden change in position caused Naruto to sink down onto Sasuke's lap, his dick digging deeper inside than Naruto would have thought possible. “Ahhhh!” Naruto moaned loudly as Sasuke’s member flipped a switch inside him as it grinded against something inside him that made him feel no pain, only pleasure.

Sasuke took a minute to acclimate to this new position and find the best speed to continue his lewd act with the boy who annoyed him so much, but who in this moment he wanted to be with so much. Naruto threw his arms and legs around Sasuke’s body, gripping him as tightly as possible. Each thrust Sasuke made Naruto met in equal measure, bouncing back slightly on Sasuke’s cock and making him moan and also sending Naruto jutting forward to rub his desperately aching cock, now sandwiched closely between his body and Sasuke’s, against Sasuke’s taught stomach, leaving behind a sticky trail of pre-cum on his pale skin.

Without warning, Sasuke reached out his hand and grabbed a hold of Naruto’s stiff member and began stroking it in unison with his thrusts. _No no no! Don’t do that! If you do that then…_ Naruto was worried that his long sought after superior position would be taken away from him if he allowed himself to wallow in pleasure like Sasuke currently was. If he let Sasuke dictate the moment then he would fall behind, if he lost now then he would never be able to forget it. But try as he might he just couldn’t refuse Sasuke’s firm grasp around his dick; it felt all too amazing to reject the motion. He might not like it, but he lacked the willpower to keep himself from falling into a sea of good feelings.

“Mmmmmm! Sasuke, you know… Sometimes, I really hate you,” Naruto leaned forward, resting his chin gracefully on Sasuke’s shoulder, and whispered into his ear in a soft, raspy tone.

“I know,” Sasuke replied, not bothering at all to stop his lovemaking or stroking of Naruto’s member.

“So much… Ah! Ah!” Naruto reiterated his contempt for him, gasping in a torrid mixture of pain and pleasure each time Sasuke thrust into him.

“Shush,” Sasuke soothed the boy, rubbing his back with his free hand while his other hand quickened its pace jerking Naruto’s cock, sliding back and forth rapidly and his hips still pounded into him again and again. “I know. Gnh! I hate you, too,” he assured Naruto right back through barely muffled pants and grunts.

It was incredibly hot in here, though whether that was just the situation they were in or if the temperature actually was high Sasuke didn't know. Sweat dripped from his body, actually from both their bodies he noticed. A bead of sweat rolled down his back onto Naruto’s hand clenched tightly around his body. He could see the perspiration running down Naruto’s face and chest, both of them burning with desire that was about to erupt.

All of a sudden Naruto realized he was close. So very close to the release he wanted so much. Sasuke’s hand expertly working his cock played a big factor, but he also realized that every movement into him hurt less and less. The pain remained, but it was overcome by more of a dull sensation, an incredible fullness as Sasuke’s penis filled him, withdrew, then rammed its way in again. Some of the thrusts Sasuke made into him even felt, dare he think it, good. This whole thing had seemed so gross and painful and unthinkable just a little while ago, but now Naruto was honestly enjoying this feeling, wallowing in this pleasure with the bastard Sasuke, being filled with a kind of pleasure he had never felt and emotions that were troubling and confusing.

“Gonna come!” Naruto alerted Sasuke, who was also rapidly approaching his own climax and responded by quickening his pace even more, pounding into him in horribly desperate, quick motions, robbing Naruto of all reason and sanity. He couldn’t stop himself from doing it, didn’t know exactly why he did it, but as his orgasm approached Naruto got a strange urge and opened his mouth wide to bare his teeth and bit down on Sasuke’s right shoulder, hard enough to leave a mark, teeth impressions to signify that Naruto had been there. He grunted loudly, fangs sinking into his rival as his mind turned white and he finally achieved the release he had so desired all this while. Thick cum erupted from his cock like a volcano, spurting across Sasuke’s belly, three, four, five shots of the sticky semen splashing against his milky skin. Naruto licked and sucked at the sensitive bite imprint he had left on Sasuke as he rode his orgasmic high back down to earth.

“Fuck!” Sasuke cried out loudly in impending need of release, the feeling of Naruto's warm spilled liquid pleasure dripping down his chest and the painful pleasurable mixture of feelings surging into him as Naruto’s teeth sunk into his shoulder sending him overboard. Naruto’s tightness spasmed and contracted around his member as the boy sprayed Sasuke’s torso with his jizz. He quickly pulled himself out from Naruto’s rear in one swift motion, aimed his dick at Naruto's chest, and after three quick, desperate tugs, splattered the blond with a cum-shot of his own, painting his stomach white with his seed.

As he came, Sasuke thought of how different his life was at this moment that it typically was. For just this moment he let himself feel again, free of his burden of killing his only brother and avenging his clan, free of his deep seated hatred and anger, free of all pretense and reason. Right here, right now, he was just Sasuke, partaking in stupid and probably misguided lust with the only person in the world whom he wanted to hug closely, but also beat the tar out of. And it felt good.

The two boys collapsed back onto Naruto’s bed, sweaty, tired, and more alive than they had ever felt before in their young lives.

***

After finishing their romp, Sasuke got up to get a wet washcloth and wiped away the numerous pearls of semen splattered on Naruto's stomach and chest as he laid unmoving on the bed, completely exhausted from the ordeal of his first fuck.

“Naruto?” Sasuke said quietly as he rubbed the cloth across his partners body, cleaning up the puddles of their combined spilled seed. The boy didn’t move an inch. Normally he would have been embarrassed beyond belief and hid away his face from looking at Sasuke, but he was just too tired to care about being buck naked as Sasuke wiped their cum from off his belly.

“Naruto,” Sasuke said louder. This time Naruto turned his head in acknowledgement, but otherwise stayed still.

“I have to go home now. I need to get ready to finish my training, okay?”

“Do whatever you want,” Naruto replied unenthusiastically, completely spent.

“But…” Sasuke began, unsure of how to word his next statement. “After the Exams are over… I’ll start coming by again, okay?”

“Sure, that’s fine,” Naruto replied waving his hand to shoo Sasuke away, making it sound like he didn’t care one way or the other.

“...Good night, Naruto,” he said with just a hint of warmth in his voice.

“Night, Sasuke” Naruto replied monotone.

Sasuke went towards the door, but paused for a moment once his hand was on the door handle and turned back, saying, “Oh, and good luck at the Chunin Exams... You’re gonna need it, loser.”

“Fuck you, Sasuke!” Naruto yelled at him, causing Sasuke to shake his head and chuckle slightly, before he headed out the door. Naruto picked up a pillow from his bed and went to throw it at him, but unfortunately he escaped behind the door unscathed.

Naruto waited to be sure Sasuke was really gone and the door had clicked behind him before he let his guard down and he succumbed to a borderline panic attack. _We actually had s-se-se-GAH I CAN’T SAY IT!_ From now on, they could no longer ignore it. Something strange was happening between them. You couldn’t just get fucked by your teammate, or fuck your teammate, and pretend like everything was the same as ever. Naruto was young, but even he understood that much. It was frustrating but he still had no idea how to classify Sasuke. Just what on earth was he to Naruto anyways?

Naruto sighed a single deep, long sigh in confusion and annoyance. “...My butt hurts. I hope this won’t affect me during the Exams. ...Next time I’m definitely going to be the one doing you,” he swore to avenge the pain in his rear end.

***

 _That dumbass bit down on me like I was a freaking bowl of ramen!_ Sasuke raged as he examined the reddish area on his neck left by Naruto in his bathroom mirror. The skin was punctured, not enough to bleed, but enough to see viable teeth marks. The area was red and inflamed from Naruto sucking on it as well. It stung when exposed against the air. “I’m going to beat his ass up,” he promised to his reflection.

Despite his harsh thinking however, for some reason Sasuke found himself slightly smiling as his fingers rubbed over wound, recalling the feeling of Naruto’s warm tightness as he clamped down on Sasuke and sunk his fangs into that tender white skin. It had been an unexpectedly amazing feeling, Naruto’s body heat, his scent, his… everything.

His examination of the mark reminded Sasuke of the other marking on his neck; the Curse Mark left by Orochimaru. Naruto’s love bite on the right side of his neck stood in stark contrast to the Curse Mark on the left side left behind by Orochimaru in the Forest of Death. These two marks symbolized the two paths before him: the one of anger and hatred or the one of friendship and… whatever the hell he was doing with Naruto. For as long as he could remember Sasuke had devoted himself to hatred, but maybe there was another way…

His smile evaporated immediately on thinking this, replaced with his usual frown of disinterest. Naruto was changing him. He realized that now. That couldn’t happen; his life wasn’t just his own to live, because he was the vessel for the combined rage and sorrow of the whole shattered Uchiha clan. He had no time to be happy or to waste on meaningless sex or distracting friendship. But even knowing that, he still found himself falling farther and farther into Naruto’s orbit like a comet being dragged unwillingly into a planet's gravity. The distance between them was smaller than it ever had been and before he had even realized it was happening Naruto had already taken a firm grip ahold of his heart. Sasuke had no idea how to pry those fingers away, how to return to his former self. He didn't even know if he _wanted_ to return to that time anymore. Being here with Team 7, with his friends, made Sasuke happier than he’d been since his family was alive. And that fact deeply frightened Sasuke to no end.

***

A heavy cloud hung over Naruto’s head. Normally he would have been thrilled at finally getting his chance to prove to everyone that he wasn’t just a screw up, that he deserved his place as a ninja and the recognition and respect that came with that title. He should have been excited at the chance to rub it in the faces of everyone who had ever singled him out and acted cruelly towards him when he walked out into the arena and fought against Neji in front of that huge crowd. They wouldn’t be able to ignore him any longer, they wouldn't be able to turn their noses and pretend he wasn’t there. He now had the opportunity to force them to accept him into the fold and deem that he was worthy after all. This was what Naruto had waited and struggled so long for, the future he dreamt about on quiet, lonely nights at home alone and during meaningless long days spent watching other children play together from afar, so obviously he should have been over the moon with excitement and joy. But for once in his life, Naruto just couldn't summon up the energy or the courage for the task at hand.

 _I was so nervous I barely slept at all,_ he thought, sitting up wearily in his bed and squinting his tired eyes to adjust to the morning light. It was difficult to fall asleep when your mind wouldn’t stay still. All night long, Naruto slipped in and out of bursts of slumber, but found himself unable to completely rest. His erratic thoughts wouldn’t allow him to completely drift asleep, meaning he only rested for maybe an hour or so at a time before his worried mind awoke him to force more anxious stressful thoughts onto him.

 _The first match is against him…_ Naruto pondered ominously, recalling any knowledge of Neji Hyuga and his fighting style that he could remember, replaying Neji’s brutal fight against his own cousin Hinata over and over again like a movie on an infinite loop in his mind as he tried to think up a good strategy to beat the vengeful boy. Naruto would have been the first to admit strategizing wasn’t exactly his strong suit, but he was desperate. If he lost, everything people said about him, every doubt cast on his worth would have been made true. Most people thought he wouldn’t have even made it this far. If Naruto lost now his success up to this point wouldn’t be noticed or commended. He knew that much. He would return right back to where he started; all but exiled and ignored, all of his hard work for naught. He hadn’t been born with the vast amount of natural talent that Sasuke and Neji inherently had, so there was no other way for him to gain respect than to tough it out and try his best.

Still, self doubt began to creep in like tentacles wrapping around his mind, refusing to let go no matter how hard he tried to reassure himself in order to loosen their devious grip. He had done his best to get stronger, trained as hard as he could with Jiraiya until he collapsed from weariness day after day, and learned a lot over the past month, but would that really be enough to defeat the cold-hearted Neji, regarded as the strongest rookie ninja in the whole Hidden Leaf Village? When he compared the two of them side by side Naruto couldn’t help but think of himself as just so… weak. That word that he hated so much. That word he was so very sick of hearing from others.He desperately wanted to prove himself, to Kakashi, to Sasuke, to everyone. He was tired of always failing, frustrated with being considered a joke. But was there really any chance for him?

 _Come on, get it together! If Sasuke saw me now he’d definitely make fun of me! I bet he’d call me a wimp or a cry baby. He’s just a bastard like that…_ Naruto paused to take a moment to think about Sasuke’s words to him a month ago, the words that had stirred up something powerful inside him. _He said he wanted to fight against me, so I just have to get through this match against Neji first. I really want to fight Sasuke too… Maybe after we fight we’ll start being friends for real,_ Naruto thought with a small smile on his face as he imagined just how Sasuke would react when they faced each other and he saw how strong Naruto had become. Would he be happy for Naruto’s growth? Or perhaps jealous?

Even with the direction their relationship had evolved recently, Naruto still had a difficult time understanding Sasuke's emotions and actions. Why Sasuke did anything he did was a mystery to Naruto. Setting aside their sexual relationship and just whatever the heck that entailed, Naruto had soon realized he wanted to be closer to Sasuke, much more so than he ever had before, not simply in a physical sense, but he wished to know more about the standoffish boy, what he thought about, what he felt, Sasuke’s opinion of Naruto, these things had become oddly important to him now. Naruto secretly hoped that two of them could actually get along outside of this room, the single place where they didn’t argue and compete, but sat together as equals. If clashing against Sasuke had even the slightest chance of allowing them to grow closer, of building their bond, then Naruto was more than willing to give Sasuke his all. Even if he lost to Sasuke–which Naruto definitely didn’t plan on doing–he hoped that his teammate would finally give him the respect he desired so much. The only obstacle to Naruto’s desires now was Neji.

_I’ll think of something and I’ll be sure to win… somehow._

Steeling his nerves the best he could, Naruto prepared his mind and body for the day’s events, throwing on his clothes and gathering his thoughts together to filter out anything unnecessary. He might have been worried about the outcome of this fight, he might have been struggling to understand his complex relationship with Sasuke, but right now Naruto needed to focus on Neji; if he was panicky and afraid, if he allowed himself to be distracted then he would lose for sure. His dreams of being Hokage and winning the respect of the village and being true friends with Sasuke were all important, but if he let them weigh on his mind too much they would only get in the way during battle.

“Ha ha ha ha, everything's gonna be fine!” he laughed aloud, reassuring himself as he walked through the crowded streets to the arena. For some reason Naruto suddenly recalled Sasuke’s opponent, the seemingly insane Sand ninja Gaara. Naruto noticed that he and Neji had something in common, despite their different fighting styles, motives, hometowns, and ideals; they had the same eyes. Those sinister glaring eyes that looked at everyone as an nothing more than an enemy to be challenged and destroyed. They were the eyes of predators seeking out prey to be devoured.

 _All those scary eyes… Is that what it means to become strong like those guys? You become angry and bitter?_ Naruto grimaced to himself at the thought. Was that what true strength was, just concentrated rage? Sasuke was very strong too, and Naruto knew that he also held his own deeply rooted anger, but the reasons behind it they had never really spoke at length about. If Sasuke didn’t want to tell him then Naruto wasn’t going to pry, but he did know it had something to do with Sasuke’s brother from the time when Sasuke had been pierced by the assassin Haku’s needles in the Land of Waves. Naruto remembered the grievously injured boy tell him about his quest to kill his older brother. Was that why Sasuke and Neji and Gaara were so strong, because of their burning hatreds buried inside? Was that what separated them and Naruto?

No, that couldn’t have been it. If that was the true secret to strength, then Naruto didn’t want to be strong. Naruto wanted to get stronger by always standing up again when he fell down and proving his worth to those around him. He fought and struggled to gain whatever little ground that he could in his ongoing battle for acceptance. His stubborn refusal to back down was what made him strong in his own opinion. Hating everyone and everything didn’t make you stronger, it just made you bitter and alone. Naruto knew that all too well. He had spent much of his childhood despising the villagers for their attitudes towards him, rather than working to change their opinion of him. That kind of strength wasn’t what he wanted. For all their strength Neji, Gaara, and Sasuke too, they were all alone, separated from the rest because of their superior bitterness. There had to be something else, something Naruto was missing. Just what in the world made people truly strong?

***

Naruto stood lined up with all the rest of the contestants for the Chunin Exams in the center of a grand arena, the vast crowd of spectators seated all around him failing to impress him; his mind was too preoccupied with other matters. Two of the exam contestants were noticeably absent; the guy from the Hidden Sound Village was one of those missing, but more importantly, so was Sasuke.

 _Has he not recovered from the injuries he got during the prelims yet? He seemed okay when I saw him the other day_ , Naruto worried unwittingly, incapable of hiding his concern for his comrade’s unexpected absence from himself. _That’s pretty strange._ _Knowing his personality I would have thought he’d be here even if it meant dragging himself here._

“Hey!” Naruto called out to the judge.

“What?” he questioned, obviously annoyed by the young ninja’s lack of decorum.

“Sasuke isn’t here yet. What’s gonna happen?”

“If he doesn’t show up by the start of his match then he’ll automatically lose,” the man replied plainly.

_...You better hurry up Sasuke. You said you wanted to fight with me, so prove it. Don’t be an idiot and loose without even showing up._

The judge quickly moved on, explaining the rules of the tournament and announcing the first match: Naruto’s fight against Neji. This was it, the moment of truth. Everything he had worked for, everything he wanted to do from here on depended on the outcome of this match. All around him Naruto could feel the many pairs of eyes silently judging him, mocking his efforts, doubting his capabilities. How could this loser wannabe ninja ever hope to beat the highly regarded Neji? This fight was just a joke to them, something to breeze through on the way to more interesting and worthwhile fights.

 _Don’t let it get to you,_ Naruto reminded himself, refusing to let the sea of judgmental faces psych him out. _Stay calm. This is what all my training was for._ Though he couldn't hear their voices, Naruto could feel the well wishes and support of people egging him on: Iruka, Sakura, Kakashi, Hinata, Kiba, and even Sasuke. That's right. If Sasuke had said he wanted to fight against Naruto then that must have meant that he had, at the very least, a small amount of confidence in Naruto’s abilities and determination to win. Sasuke wouldn’t have said what he said if he didn’t have any faith in Naruto; he wasn’t the type to say meaningless words for the sake of placating others feelings. Right here on this arena floor, Naruto knew he wasn’t alone. For the first time in his life he had people on his side rooting for him. They may have not been standing right beside him, but they were all with him in spirit. He suddenly felt empowered, as strong as he had ever felt in his life. Naruto stared down Neji, concentrated and unblinking, his anxious fear and self doubt washed away, replaced with a sense of confidence and strength.

“Looks like you have something to say,” Neji mocked him with a cocky smirk.

“I told you before that you’re definitely going down!” Naruto shouted back, holding out his fist. He seemed almost a completely different person now, one brimming with power. _You’re just the first step. I have a long way to go in order to become Hokage. I’m going to beat you Neji. And I’m gonna kick Sasuke’s butt too, and he’ll be amazed by how strong I’ve become, and then he’ll finally acknowledge me as an equal. I won’t give up. There’s no way I can lose now. Not when I have people that believe in me!_

***

“Naruto Uzumaki is the winner!” the judge shouted, announcing the end of the match and Neji’s defeat.

The crowd roared with unexpected excitement, completely stunned at how well Naruto had performed. A thunder of applause and congratulatory shouts rang out across the wide arena space, surprising Naruto with their sheer volume. He grinned ear to ear, laughing bashfully at the unexpected attention. He began to showboat his victory, running around wildly and blow kisses of appreciation to the audience.

A untold feeling of pride washed over Naruto like he had never felt before. He had accomplished what most assumed was impossible for him, something that deep down even he doubted he could do on his own without the support of his team. But more importantly, the people sitting in this the arena, many of the from the Hidden Leaf Village, were wholeheartedly showing their support for Naruto and his upset victory. People who had written him off his whole life were now enthusiastically cheering him on. He had fought well and earned that much at least. A wellspring in Naruto burst forth, a surge of hope filling him. If he could continue to impress, continued to defy the odds and prove his worth, then perhaps there was a place for him here after all. Maybe people would come to accept him after all if he never gave up his relentless pursuit of strength and acknowledgement. It had worked for him so far; he now had people who supported him and who also relied on him. Ever since he had found out the Nine Tails that had attacked the Leaf Village 13 years ago was sealed up inside him and plainly understood why he had been segregated from the rest of society Naruto had expanded his horizons vastly, learning new things, gaining new allies, people who honestly sought his success. He now had people who cared about him, people he could actually call friends. Learning that horrible truth had fractured his world, but surprisingly for the better. He just had to keep on this path. To never lose faith in himself, to never give up; the struggles he had experienced in his life had led him to this conclusion. That was Naruto’s way forward, the way for him to become strong. The way for him to change things so he wasn’t hated anymore.

Despite his elation over his victory, Naruto couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed when he looked up at the contestants stand; Sasuke was still absent. He had been hoping that his teammate had come in late while he was busy fighting, but Sasuke was still missing in action. _Where are you Sasuke? I wanted you to watch my match,_ Naruto thought with just a tinge of hurt feelings. He wanted to prove himself to Sasuke more than anyone else. The fact that his fiercest rival hadn’t been here watching his greatest victory to date spoiled Naruto’s mood, if only a small amount. He was truly ecstatic, filled with pure happiness over his upset defeat of Neji. It was just that he would have been happier if Sasuke had been here watching. Naruto had imagined beforehand what Sasuke would do when he won, wondering if he would have brushed it off as the mellow boy usually did or if Sasuke would have actually congratulated him, perhaps even been proud of his achievement. Naruto did his best not to let Sasuke’s absence interrupt his good mood. Hopefully they would be fighting against each other soon enough. Sasuke would see first hand just how determined Naruto had become.

***

Naruto stood on the arena floor once again, having jumped down to bitch out Shikamaru for forfeiting his own match while on the verge of victory. A leaf floated down gently in the air out of nowhere, followed by another and another, the green plants sent cascading downwards by the light breeze. Then a sudden whirlwind of leaves exploded onto the scene, a cyclone of wind spinning the leaves round and round, heralding the arrival of the late final contestant. The leaves fluttered before Naruto's face, dancing about in the air as the tornado slowed its pace and Sasuke and Kakashi appeared in the midst of the storm. An excited, expectant smile grew across Naruto’s face. Finally that jackass had shown up.

“Just how late were you planning on being, huh?! I was beginning to think you weren't gonna show up 'cuz you were too afraid to fight me!” he accosted Sasuke playfully.

“Heh. Don't get so worked up, moron,” Sasuke replied with a knowing smile of his own. “I’m guessing from how excited you are that you won your round?” He didn’t seem the least bit surprised in learning of Naruto’s victory, as if he had predicted the boy would win anyways, despite no one having confidence in him.

“Of course!” Naruto grinned confidently back at him.

The two comrades looked each other in the eyes and for a moment it seemed as if the whole world melted away and only the two of them stood together in this coliseum. Passion burned in both their eyes, passion to best one another in combat, passion to definitively settle their rivalry, and perhaps also the passion to understand one another better. For just this instant they were the only ones here and the looks in their eyes did all the speaking that was necessary. The two boys gazed at each other without a single word falling between them, each attempting to convey hidden feelings they were too proud or too fearful to express to the other.

_Sasuke, we might not get along sometimes–or more like a lot of the time actually–but… I really do consider you… my first real friend. You never made fun of me for not having parents. You never treated me differently, like I was a monster or an inconvenience; you’re a jerk to me like you are to everyone else. It’s really annoying, but I’m also thankful for that. That let’s me feel like I’m just a normal person, like I’m more than just a container for this stupid fox. We fight a lot and I tell you that I hate you all the time, but... I don’t actually hate you. It’s just that you know how to piss me off better than anyone else! You're a big jerk, cocky, and annoying to boot, but you’re also pretty cool sometimes. You’re the first friend I ever had and even if we want to punch each other at times, you’re still important to me because I never had anyone to yell at and fight with before. I want us to be friends for real though. I’m going to beat you because I have to. I want to make you realize that I’m not weak. I want you to respect me for real. I may not know much about friendship, but I don’t think friends should look down on each other like that. When I’m Hokage I’ll be strong enough to protect everyone, including you. Not because I don't respect you, but because you’re all alone like I used to be before I met you and Sakura and everyone else. And I don’t want you to be alone anymore. It’s just too sad. So when I beat you then you'll finally respect me. And then I can tell you how much meeting you changed my life and we can be friends for real. Then neither of us will have to be alone any more._

_Naruto… I used to think you were just an idiot and a talentless loser who wasn’t good for anything. But you’re different than that. I get that now. You always try your best, despite what anyone else thinks of you. You’re tired of being an outsider so you struggle and suffer so much in order to get people to notice you. Well… I notice you. I understand how much you want acceptance. Even if no one else will, I’ll pay attention to you. If I abandon you now you’ll probably just end up doing something super stupid anyways. ...I’m sorry, but I can’t let you beat me. After all, I can’t afford to go easy on you, I have too much at stake here. It’s not because I hate you, but… because you’re my only friend. I really wish I was brave enough to tell you that. I need you to be the one needing protecting, I need you to be the one running after me. Everything I have to do relies on me being the stronger one. So I want you to give me your best so I can test myself. After you lose I’ll even treat you to some ramen so you know there’s no hard feelings between us._

Sasuke broke eye contact with Naruto to look up into the contestants stands. Gaara was awaiting his gaze their, returning a look of calm madness and desire to crush Sasuke.

“Don’t lose to that guy,” Naruto warned Sasuke as he glared up at Gaara.

“Yeah,” he simply replied.

“Sasuke!” Naruto called out once more, catching Sasuke slightly off guard with his seriousness. “I… want to fight you too!”

“...Yeah,” Sasuke said simply again, reaffirming his desire to fight Naruto with one simple word. Naruto grinned back at him widely as Sasuke prepared for his battle against the fearsome Gaara. Sasuke just had to win this fight. Naruto was itching to have a real match with his long time rival, to settle things once and for all. Now that he had finally caught Sasuke’s attention Naruto certainly didn't intend to disappoint.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶t̶a̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶ ̶b̶r̶e̶a̶k̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶3̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶4̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶n̶e̶e̶d̶ ̶e̶d̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶.̶ ̶I̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶,̶ ̶I̶'̶m̶ ̶a̶ ̶t̶e̶r̶r̶i̶b̶l̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶s̶a̶i̶d̶ ̶l̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶I̶'̶d̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶l̶y̶ ̶u̶p̶d̶a̶t̶e̶s̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶o̶n̶,̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶I̶ ̶s̶t̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶s̶e̶r̶i̶o̶u̶s̶l̶y̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶e̶n̶d̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶d̶e̶l̶i̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶I̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶b̶a̶c̶k̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶f̶i̶x̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶s̶e̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶k̶e̶e̶p̶ ̶b̶u̶g̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶o̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶b̶l̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶f̶o̶c̶u̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶d̶u̶c̶t̶i̶v̶e̶.̶ ̶S̶o̶ ̶y̶e̶s̶,̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶v̶e̶r̶y̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶r̶y̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶h̶i̶a̶t̶u̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶f̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶,̶ ̶h̶o̶p̶e̶f̶u̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶o̶ ̶l̶o̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶(̶m̶a̶y̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶ ̶o̶r̶ ̶s̶o̶,̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶g̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶v̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶f̶i̶x̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶a̶r̶t̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶l̶a̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶e̶n̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶f̶i̶n̶i̶s̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶)̶. ̶B̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶c̶k̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶n̶e̶w̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶s̶p̶a̶r̶k̶l̶y̶ ̶s̶h̶i̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶e̶n̶j̶o̶y̶,̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶I̶ ̶h̶o̶p̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶m̶a̶k̶e̶s̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶l̶i̶t̶t̶l̶e̶ ̶b̶i̶t̶.̶
> 
> But like I promised, here's the title of the next chapter which I am working on intermittently, but revising previous chapters is my main focus right now as I said. It's called Chapter 6: Naruto's Birthday. How's he supposed to react when he gets a present from the person he least expected to be nice to him?


	6. Naruto's Birthday (first half)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even if it were the day he was born, October 10 had held no real significance for young Naruto Uzumaki throughout his troubled life. But now that he had people around him to notice and appreciate the significance of that date, to care about his birth, his formerly cynical attitude of ambivalence about the celebration might change when Naruto receives a shockingly thoughtful gift from an unexpected someone in a similar position.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm deeply sorry to all you readers who were so supportive and kept asking for updates that it's been so long. I never meant to go MIA, but I've been stuck between terrible writer's block and deep depression for a long time and they end up fueling each other; because I'm so down it's difficult to write and because I don't get anything good done I feel even worse. I'm trying to get back in the groove again now. Honestly I'm shocked that it's been over a year, I never realized I had been gone so long.
> 
> I wish I could say I have a big backlog of chapters for you after all this time, but I don't. Please forgive me if this chapter isn't at the same level as the rest, I know it's not some of my better work. I hope for now it will suffice until I get the chance to fix it. I need time to reread and edit to get back into this series after such a long break. It's hard to write well in that bad condition and I want to try to keep the quality fairly consistent, which is tough with such long chapters. Because of this the next couple chapters may not be as good as the rest while I work, but I will come back and even that difference out with rewrites in time. That sort of thing matters to me since I'm a loser and have a sentimental attachment to these dorks, so I'd like to do my best work continuing writing this. Thank you for understanding.
> 
> I really hate to do this, but since I'm only half way done with this chapter I'm splitting it into two parts. So yes, it ends on a cliff hanger ATM. ̶I̶ ̶s̶h̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶p̶a̶r̶t̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶e̶w̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶ ̶m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶,̶ but I favored a quick update over a wholly complete one since it's been so long since I've put out ANYTHING. For now it will be in two parts, but eventually I'll come back and fuse them together like I always intended.

What to do, what to do? The masked man's lone uncovered droopy eye stared disinterested into the pool of sizzling broth sitting before him on the counter in a big ceramic bowl, expression glazed over. He looked mesmerized by that swirling bowl of grub beneath his nose, lost in deep thought like peering into a crystal ball divining the future, like it would know what he needed to accomplish his task and show him the future.

An unrepentant mooch in most circumstances, for once he instead wanted to do something nice for one of his young wards who suffered from his carelessness and get the scamp a gift, but he had no idea what to get the boy. The white haired guy's expression may have seemed as solid as stone, but his mind was currently a jumbled mess. Ask him about the standard Jutsu techniques learned by every shinobi in the five major nations and he could recite them and preform them all from memory, along with dozens of more advanced moves. Good memory was integral to being dubbed 'The Copy Ninja.' But ask the man what to get someone for their birthday and all he would meet you with was a dumbfounded blank stare. His intuition ran dry when it came to interpersonal relationships. He was simply no good at this sort of thing. What a perplexing mess he was in.

The normally inattentive jounin Kakashi Hatake slouched pensively in the Ichiraku Ramen stall staring into his neglected bowl that was starting to cool off. No apparitions appeared within the meal to guide him on his quest for a good gift. As if noodles would have the answers he sought. Nothing was ever that easy. Sitting next to the quietly sulking man was his eating companion for this evening, the kindly if somewhat strict Academy instructor Iruka Umino, the two men enjoying bowls of ramen and discussing a topic of current importance. Kakashi was having an unusually tough time figuring out just what to do on his own, so he came to the younger shinobi for assistance and advice. The subject of concern they were discussing happened to be a certain noisy blond genin that they both had an important connection to.

“Naruto’s not causing you too much trouble, is he?” Iruka asked uneasily, breaking the awkward silence of Kakashi's odd staring contest with his dinner as the teacher dipped his chopsticks into his own steaming bowl of thick, mouthwatering chow and slurped it down. He was dreading some bad news what with Kakashi's tense demeanor. It would break his heart to hear that Naruto wasn't fitting in with his team even after all this time, that he still hadn't acclimated to being around people. On one hand Iruka was curious how his former student was doing, but was also trying not to seem overly nosy and critical of Kakashi’s squad dynamics. By longstanding tradition jounin had autonomy when it came to what they taught and how their teams functioned, and questioning the state or readiness of another shinobi's squad was seen as a great insult in their culture. Iruka hoped the older man didn't view his query that way, he honestly meant no disrespect. It was difficult for him to mask his intrusive concern, but it wasn't like it was coming from a bad place. The little punk that reminded him so much of himself was always on Iruka's mind.

“Well, he definitely gets in over his head and raises a ruckus from time to time, but it’s nothing I can’t handle. I’m made of tougher stuff than that,” Kakashi managed to wiggle a plain boast into his reassurance, passing over any sort of implications raised by Iruka's pestering. He knew better that the worrisome man didn't mean anything by it, he was only showing his concern. “But even if he is a pain sometimes, Naruto is essentially a good kid at heart,” he quickly added, hoping to not agitate the defensive Iruka about the sensitive matter. It was true anyways, even if Kakashi had never said so to the lad. The stingy jounin rarely praised his students directly to their faces unless they were especially deserving, but behind their backs he often proudly spoke of all three of his student’s skills. Though he may be skimpy on compliments, he was truly proud of how much they had progressed. Kakashi might not show it openly very often, but he had actually grown very fond of those three brats, even if they did drive him completely nuts sometimes, particularly when a certain stubborn pair refused to cease their obnoxious hyper-competitive nonsense.

“That’s good,” Iruka sighed with relief, smiling sheepishly in embarrassment of his obvious fretting. “I know he can be a handful, but whenever we get together for ramen all he can talk about is you and his teammates. Makes me feel a little bit lonely,” he continued with a chuckle, trying to hold back his jealously. Once upon a time he had been the only one there for the shunned young blond. Iruka was of course overjoyed that Naruto had people he could depend upon now, but it was hard to resist those urges desiring to be special to the boy and be active in his everyday life. Naruto talked so fast and excitedly about his new life with such a rapid fire enthusiasm Iruka couldn't help but feel a little left out since he wasn't along for the ride beside him. Letting go was hard to do.

Kakashi knew that Iruka looked on Naruto as a little foster brother of sorts, often quietly fretting and worrying in the background about the boy's well being even when unnecessary and nosily shouting and hammering him when he did something wrong. During Naruto’s time at the Academy Iruka had been a strict, relentless teacher, harder on Naruto than any other of his students to toughen him up and push him to succeed, but now that Naruto was gone his once restrained bias and affection for the boy shined through much more clearly. Iruka had always pushed Naruto harder than the others because of their shared heritage as orphans, both of them robbed of their parents by the Nine Tailed Fox. Just like Kakashi, he wanted Naruto to succeed, and being easy on the kid would never get him to his ultimate dream of Hokage. And Kakashi also knew that Naruto in return reserved a special place in his heart for his former teacher, one of the few people in their village that had ever been kind to the poor boy. That was exactly why he had come to speak to Iruka; he knew Naruto's emotions, his ups and downs better than anyone else, perhaps even the other members of Team 7. If any one could offer up advice about Naruto is was the strict instructor.

“Don’t be such a worry wort, he's doing fine. Naruto always finds a way, even if it's out of a mess that he created," Kakashi responded assuredly with pure sardonic wit. He had enough first hand experience dealing with the fallout and repercussions of Naruto's hard headed spontaneous action to know it was true. Naruto was stronger than most gave him credit for, living on his own at his ripe age, independent and spunky and possessing indomitable will. He didn't need people worrying about him, eventually he worked things out on his own. All in all, he knew how to survive. Both the tutors grabbing a bite had similar experiences being orphaned early on as Naruto did so they could understand the same sort of isolating experiences. That being said, Kakashi was sure that even if Iruka's pestering annoyed the knucklehead sometimes, his often forceful displays of concern were nonetheless deeply appreciated by the boy. Living that way was difficult and demoralizing. Just because someone COULD survive on their own didn't mean they would want to. Much as Iruka may worry, the boy needed those attachments he had built recently; the teacher had nothing to fear of being abandoned by his favorite pupil. Naruto depended on all of them for support now.

Kakashi laughed wryly to himself. He might make fun of Iruka for being too attached, but he himself didn't seem to be as distant and nonpartisan as he would have liked to believe. Those little punks just had a way of growing on him he supposed. They could always depend oh him, Kakashi hoped Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto understood that.

"If anything I'm the one who should be jealous," Kakashi recounted, adding a tremble of faux hurt in his voice for comedic effect. "Naruto’s always so excited to come here and eat with you after finishing up a mission, you shouldn't feel bad at all. ...Though speaking honestly, I’m not sure whether he’s more happy to see you or the ramen,” Kakashi punctuated his statement with a joke. At least he thought it was a joke; Kakashi sure hoped Naruto valued his friends over his favorite food, but... well you never knew with that little scamp.

“I know exactly what you mean,” Iruka replied with a dismissive snort, but a considerate, reminiscing sheen in his eye, far off gaze speaking volumes of how he knew the truth of the matter. Naruto’s appetite was practically legendary, his love of ramen above near all else well known to them. How could such a small boy have the appetite of a ravenous elephant? But they both knew from storied experience Naruto didn't operate with such ulterior motives; no way did he think so little of his comrades to care more about stuffing his face. Equal to them, perhaps. Yes he was a bit dense and a troublesome rascal when the mood arose, but Naruto was also genuine and good-natured. And he did enjoy that decompression time with Iruka however infrequently it occurred these days and how tough he liked to act.

“Anyways,” Kakashi spoke nonchalantly, deftly switching topics to the real reason he had asked Iruka here. Chit chat was nice and all, not that he didn't enjoy talking about his squad, but those platitudes were more useful for buttering up his target. Information was a commodity ninja relied on and he needed some critical details from Iruka. A ninja of his caliber asking for assistance was no easy matter. “Tomorrow is Naruto’s birthday and I was wondering if you had any ideas on what to get him. I couldn’t think of what he would want, so I’d thought I’d come ask you. You would know best after all.”

It wasn't like Kakashi to ask for advice-he was too proud and stubborn a man for that, whether he admitted it or not-but he was in a bit of a pickle here. Kakashi's expertise ran more along the lines of annihilating squads of troops, not personal things like this. His brain had been shaped by war and strife, a personality modeled into that of a warrior, so sentimental experiences and thoughtful expressions were few and far between in his lifetime and he had no natural intuition on the subject. The topic might as well have been in a different language. But Naruto deserved a token of appreciation for his efforts, to show that he was truly valued by his captain. It was worth getting a little humble for the boy who tried so hard.

“Ah, well,” Iruka stumbled bashfully, obviously embarrassed at being called out for the abundant attention he paid to Naruto. Kakashi sure knew how to stroke his target's ego well. It wasn't just his genin he liked to manipulate and play with. “He would probably say something like a bunch of instant ramen or coupons for Ichiraku, something along those lines, but since he lives alone I think something practical works much better. For example, he was getting too big for his old ones so last year I got him a new set of pajamas. Things he can actually use are always a sure bet. Even if they aren't all that exciting.”

What a doting big brother, Kakashi mused with a knowing smile hidden beneath his facial coverings and an amused eye roll. Always the nagging caretaker, thinking in such practical terms. Kakashi himself had something in mind he wished to run by Iruka, a gift far more unconventional, but no less useful than Iruka's own tastes. He was thinking of something a little less... safe. But WAY more fun. Something you wouldn't expect your mom to buy you, no disrespect meant to Iruka. It was more oriented towards Kakashi's field of knowledge and he supposed maybe a 13 year old would prefer a more 'big boy' gift, if you caught his drift. Naruto had grown so much in such a short time, Kakashi thought he deserved a little reward. Of the adult variety.

“You know… turning 13 is a big deal for a boy. All kinds of changes going on and new feelings to deal with. It’s an important time in a young man’s life. But it can be weird and confusing too. Puberty's tough to deal with when you’re a ninja, right? Well anyway, Naruto’s not just a kid anymore, he’s a teenager now. And like most teenagers I’m guessing he’s probably pretty… curious about stuff.” Kakashi's voice dripped with suggestion and insinuation as he sprung his operation to convince his compatriot, but Iruka mistakenly overlooked it for the time being; Kakashi was never forceful or vocal about his less than reputable... hobbies. It never occurred to the younger man that Kakashi was suggesting something lewd.

“What are you getting at, Kakashi?” Iruka questioned nervously, raising a suspicious eyebrow. He knew Naruto was growing up, he didn’t need to be reminded if that. It seemed like only yesterday that kid had been a snot nosed little punk pulling pranks and getting into loads of trouble in Iruka’s class, and now he was already a teenager. Time passed by so fast. ...I really shouldn't think that way, Iruka reminded himself woefully. It makes me feel way older than I really am. He had to stop thinking about the matter else he might just tear up; inside Iruka was just a mushy softie.

“Well, I was just thinking that you probably never had ‘the talk’ with him before, right?” Kakashi dropped the punchline on his eating companion like a ton of bricks. Most people probably wouldn't have made a big deal about it and brushed it off as a joke. Oh, but Iruka wasn't laughing about such a despicable comment, no sir!

“W-what?!” Iruka stuttered, his face going bright red instantly. “What kind of teacher do you think I am?!” Sex ed wasn't a standard course in the Shinobi curriculum, especially for kids that young! Kakashi's bad habits were definitely showing something fierce today.

“Exactly my point," Kakashi contended. "He’s probably in the dark about about that stuff. Naruto’s getting older, he needs to learn about it sooner or later, why not now? So I was thinking that maybe my birthday present to him could be lending him my copy of Make Out Paradise for a while. I’m sure he’d make good use of it.”

A boy that age should posses a feisty spark of sexual curiosity and naughtiness, which the little trickster indeed had in spades. What was the harm in getting him acquainted with a little sleaze, Naruto wasn't so innocent in reality. I mean, the sadistic brat amused himself going around trying to arouse men in his butt naked, flirtatious Sexy Jutsu form for god's sake! Kakashi was certain Naruto would appreciate his efforts to give him something he would enjoy. Sexual playfulness was perfectly healthy at this exploitative age, no need to treat the pubescent lad like a nuisance for his natural feelings or box it off because of prudishness. He should be free to explore a little, and Kakashi was more than happy to let Naruto delve in, only just a bit of course. Kakashi wasn't irresponsible you know. This was special, it wasn't ever day a young man became 13. He hoped Iruka would allow it to just let Naruto read some smutty romance and go wild with some much needed private time. Those books were pretty explicit you know and an active teenage mind could be put to good use that way. Kakashi honestly couldn't think of a better gift for a hyperactive, bawdy young man on the cusp of puberty to receive.

Well Iruka wasn't of the same mind. He obviously had a different philosophy based on his visceral reaction. Iruka dropped his chopsticks after hearing Kakashi’s startling suggestion, the wooden sticks falling from his grasp and splashing into the remaining broth. He couldn't believe it, this dirty minded jounin had no shame! Giving those trashy, perverted books to a minor, absolutely unbelievable!

“Don’t. You. Dare,” Iruka overtly threatened the carefree masked man who was pushing his luck with an ominous growl, his face deadly serious as he turned to scowl menacingly at Kakashi. Each word was emphasized with dangerous force behind it for maximum impact. “If you give Naruto your trashy books I swear I’m going to hunt you down, Kakashi!” It took a lot of courage to threaten a man who was technically your superior in the totem pole of ninja hierarchy and it certainly went a long way to show how much he did his best to protect the knucklehead adolescent he cared so much about.

Kakashi sat in temporarily stunned silence at Iruka’s fuming anger, unexpected push back throwing him off balance. He had expected the man to put up a fuss, but nothing like this and had predicted Iruka would eventually come around to the idea. A critical mistake on Kakashi's part, not one he was used to making in his long, successful career. Kakashi leaned away cautiously from the irate chunin, just in case Iruka exploded at him and began a torrent of hasty berating the likes of which he laid on Naruto. Better to be safe than sorry. Never had he seen a man who seemed so mild and straight-laced as Iruka turn into a howling angry, demanding dictator with such swift efficiency, like he had split personalities or something. Then again, teaching a hell-raiser such as Naruto Uzumaki was an ever trying experience that tested your patience and fortitude every day, every nerve and impulse constantly under fire by his antics, so Kakashi could understand that duality somewhat. He had just been kidding-sort of-but Kakashi hadn’t expected the teacher to react that badly to the idea. Boy, he really did look out for Naruto like an annoying, overprotective big brother.

“Calm down, Iruka. I was only kidding. I wouldn’t do something like that without your permission,” Kakashi attempted to reassure and calm the younger man, trying to assuage his fears. It was a blatant lie of course, but desperate times and desperate measures and all that.

“I mean it, you’d better not! That pure and innocent kid who hasn’t even had his first kiss yet… if you get paint all over the pretty white canvas of his mind I swear I’ll make you pay!” the scarred man again threatened his elder, deploying his shield of protectiveness to block Kakashi's well known lax attitude from turning Naruto into a pervy slacker.

“I promise I won’t do anything bad, Iruka,” Kakashi assured him once more with innocent eyes and a promising tone. Convincing to be sure. But anyone who really knew him however would have known that some of Kakashi's greatest skills were lying and manipulating people, and this moment was not out of the ordinary for a devious man like himself.

Sigh. Such a troublesome older brother, Kakashi lamented Iruka's ferocious over-protectiveness, his plans quickly going down the drain as soon as he had dreamed them up. Aside from that, Naruto sure as heck wasn't as pure like Iruka claimed, but he was probably seeing him with biased eyes. Iruka was such a spoil sport, what was the harm with letting the curious young man have just a peek of the salacious adult world, a little taste and glimpse of a bawdy good time to prepare him for what was ahead and whet his appetite? He was growing up like a weed, Iruka couldn't shelter Naruto forever from the big bad world.

That all being said, Kakashi was brave, but he wasn't going to tempt fate and risk it all just for a birthday present to one of his bratty lovable little students; he had heard Iruka's ear piercing shrieks before echoing across the village, he could do without the extra headache. The trio of kids tailing around him gave the man enough of those for a lifetime thanks.

Well, guess that idea's out then. Gotta think up something new, Kakashi grumbled in frustration, disappointed that he had to toss out his carefully laid plans over the pesky objections of a former teacher. He now picked dejectedly at his ramen dish, pushing and prodding the noodles around as the veteran shinobi racked his brain for a new option. Iruka looked on suspiciously from the corner of his eyes for a moment as if ensuring that Kakashi wouldn't pull anything funny, his evil eye designed to silence any protest. The ominous vengeful surveying kept Kakashi quiet, with which Iruka was satisfied. No one would corrupt Naruto on his watch!

And unluckily for Kakashi, Naruto didn't need his 'romance novels' for assistance; he was moving along quite well without any instruction manuals. He had a natural inclination for that type of thing. He had great intuition after all!

And unfortunately for Iruka–or probably fortunately, considering how ballistic he would get if only he knew the truth–unbeknownst to either of the feuding men, Naruto had indeed already had his first kiss–and a lot more than that–with another student in his class. A male student no less, a rival classmate whom Naruto had seen as his biggest competitor for years now. Iruka would have never guessed those two who butted heads so frequently and passionately would have ended up exploring like that, hated foes taking their heated feelings to a different level entirely. That formerly blank canvas of Naruto’s immature purity had already been covered with the dirty ink of one Sasuke Uchiha, another former student of his. The two boys had left filthy, degrading paint marks all over each other’s previously innocent and pure canvases, the sullen, calm dark blue ink staining Naruto and seeping into his skin never to be removed and the opposite bright, exciting orange paint covering Sasuke and assisting in driving away the bleak darkness. If only he knew what those two boys did for each other the poor guy would blow a gasket. Maybe it was all for the better; the last thing Naruto needed on his birthday was an impromptu sex ed lesson from the awkward Iruka. Talk about a lousy gift.

***

The radiant sun dawned effortlessly, introducing another average day for young Naruto. The warm beams of light rose and crested over the village where he resided without any fuss or pomp and circumstance as they had for the past twelve years previous, never giving any indication that today was any different than all the days before and all the ones to follow. The calendar greeted him grimly after Naruto woke up, announcing and proclaiming the solemn date with neither a big red circle or lots of exclamation points or any other clear marker of importance. Because it wasn't. It was merely October 10.

It was a day like any other, nothing special, nothing to be excited about. Blue sky, birds chirping, a belly full of ramen, all that happy wholesome jazz that made life worth living. Painfully routine. First breakfast and then morning exercises to help wake the sleepyhead up, surely to be followed by squabbles with stuck up bastards who liked to talk shit. That's what was in store for him today. It was all he could hope for.

Over the years Naruto had gotten used to this typical itinerary for this particular day in question. Just lay low and don't expect anything. For once he wouldn't be making a ruckus and playing tricks on his persecutors. The last thing Naruto needed was a target on his back on today of all days. All he was going to do was pick up some supplies and head back home for some tv time before Team 7 had to meet up later in the afternoon. Quick, simple, and easy. That was until he was stopped by the lovely crush of his dreams and the day became anything but.

Naruto was standing outside the ninja tool shop where he had just purchased some new kunai reviewing his purchase when an unexpected tap on his shoulder made him spin around to see the pink haired girl with the fiery temperament standing there smiling, looking a vision as always to him.

"Oh, hey Sakura!" he responded positively elated to her unexpected appearance.

“So, Naruto… are you excited about today?” Sakura cheerfully asked with a smile as she bounded up to him with that whole 'I know something you don't know' kind of mood. Having her so excited to see him-unlike the usual berating she regularly wounded him with-almost made Naruto's heart explode. Her jubilant face was a breath of fresh air.

“Today? What’s happening today?” he asked her back puzzled. Their mission this afternoon was just a lousy D-ranked one, so it wasn't much to look forward to. Aside from that, Naruto was having a hard time focusing on anything else with her being so nice to him and all. Usually it was punches and shouts, not smiles and questions. What a nice change of pace to brighten his day.

“...You’ve got to be kidding me. Did you hit your head and get amnesia or something? It is a special day, isn’t it?” the dumbfounded girl reacted in awe, trying to give her companion a hint about something obvious.

“Huh? Special day?” Naruto questioned curiously, crossing his arms and pondering deep in thought for a moment, racking his brain for an answer. “Uummmm, it’s not 2-for-1 day at Ichiraku, since that’s next week. I know because I marked it down ahead of time on my calendar so I wouldn’t forget. Uhh, let's see, the new volume of the manga I like doesn’t come out until next month, so it can't be that either. Hmmmm, what day is it? I just can’t think.”

“It’s your birthday, you blockhead! The day you were born!” Sakura snapped and yelled at him, totally exasperated with his absentmindedness and fed up with playing a guessing game. Surely, Naruto might not have been the brightest light bulb, but how could he be dimwitted enough to forget his own birthday?! Of all the things to be oblivious and forgetful about, he picked a strange one.

But in complete reverse of what Sakura had expected, Naruto's expression oddly turned less bright upon mention of the significance of the date, like being reminded of something he would have rather not been. He wasn't his normal optimistic, ball of energy self, noticeably becoming more tempered and dour, perhaps even downcast, from the delivery of her news. It wasn't even a subtle change-not that Naruto was typically one to sit quiet and calm-and the radical shift left Sakura flabbergasted.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I guess it is,” the blond replied unenthusiastically, reacting to the supposedly unimportant detail with a half-hearted disinterested shrug and continued walking on his way, breezing along passed the subject and his team mate as well. Ugh, he just wanted this stressful day over with already. It only ever caused problems and tense situations for him, his whole dang life.

Happy one moment and evasive the next in a rapid mood swing, dropping his ever precocious attitude, what a messy turn of events Sakura had unwittingly stepped into with her friend. She stopped for a moment, completely thrown off balance by Naruto's blase attitude while he whisked on by. It wasn't like him to play coy, Naruto was no shy wallflower or. This same guy who got so darn excited over mere ramen and worked up over going out on missions just brushed off his own birthday like it was nothing. She had expected he would have been ecstatic and bouncing off the walls, but he was so passive and calm it was a total shock to her system. His indifference was startling and halted the young lady from inquiring further. She didn't know why, Sakura just felt the compelling feeling that she had stepped on a time bomb and should let the subject be, it was for the best of everyone involved.

"H-hey, where are you going?" she tried to stop Naruto as he swiftly made his exit, calling out to the atypically brusque boy after almost forgetting the reason she had sought him out in the first place. "I got you something."

Naruto stopped dead in his tracks and turned around to face her. His eyes glistened with overly joyful sentiment, obviously touched at the through expended. "You got me something, Sakura? ...Are we going on a date?!" he asked after a pause with a shocked gasp. His formerly dim eyes lit up, the genin bouncing up and down in sheer joy like a dog waiting impatiently for a walk. Oh boy, here we went again. Naruto never could control himself when it came to this hopelessly one sided puppy love of his.

"Think again," Sakura replied with a chuckle, laughing off his billionth attempt to connect romantically with her. At least the prospect of the opportunity of a lifetime seemed to return him to normal, goofy, enthusiastic Naruto, that was a weight off Sakura's shoulders. You couldn't blame a guy for trying his luck though, even if he never seemed to receive the message. No, maybe he did get that she just wasn't into him that way, but Naruto was simply that stubborn and stuck to his oath of never giving up. "I'm not that generous you know," Sakura informed him. Her gift would have to do as a substitute.

"Awww, man," Naruto whined in disappointment, but for the most part didn't seem too phased by the sting of repeated string of defeats Sakura had served him. Rejection was par for the course, why would today be any different? "Thanks for the gift anyway. But I didn't even know you knew when my birthday was," he mused with surprise.

"Of course! What kind of person do you think I am? We're teammates, you dork," Sakura defended herself from his accusation of uncaring. Sure, she may have been rough when turning him down the many many times he sought her love, but that was out of necessity since she didn't want to string him along or give the guy false hope. It wasn't like Sakura hated the blond or took things out on him ...that often, and here he was acting like it was the only kind thing she had ever done to him. It was seriously uncomfortable to be confronted with that attitude. Regardless, Naruto was all grins as she handed the small box to him.

Heh, eat it Sasuke! I got a gift from Sakura! Naruto gloated triumphantly as he took the neatly wrapped package from her and held it in his hands preciously, tightly curled orange bow atop the simple red wrapping paper and all. Finally some progress! For once he had gotten the upper hand on his foe and boy did it feel great! He was so focused on that fact he neglected to notice this was the first birthday present not from Iruka-sensei he had ever received in his life. Once again his passionate rivalry dominated his dangerously one track mind.

"I know Sasuke's too," she promptly gushed with a sickeningly sweet inflection added to her words, swiftly and effectively crushing the tiny flame of hope kindled in Naruto's heart and stamping prematurely on both his victory and affection in one blow. Of course she had gotten her favorite a gift too, how could he have overlooked that? All Sasuke's rabid fangirls probably collected every detail of his life they could scrounge up into a creepily comprehensive dossier filled with useful tidbits about the jerky jerkface. It should come as no surprise, it only made sense for Sakura to make a big deal about it. Oh, love was so brutal sometimes. "He barely even noticed, like he didn't care about it at all!" she stated aghast as if it were the most unbelievable thing in the world that Sasuke ignore her thoughtfulness. "I swear, you guys may fight like cats and dogs, but every now and then you act so similar it's scary. Always so single minded and careless. Anyways, so I got him this-"

Naruto was honestly only halfway paying attention to Sakura's diatribe, drifting in and out of her spiel complaining about whatever gift she had gotten Sasuke that he apparently, big shock, hadn't fully appreciated to her specifications, blond silently nodding in feigned agreement to whatever it was she was talking about. An odd thought crossed Naruto's mind, triggered by the topic and he couldn't relinquish it, preoccupying him away from Sakura's fretting. He didn't know Sasuke's birthday and they were sworn enemies, so it was odd that Sakura did know. ...Well, perhaps not on second thought, considering how obsessed with the black haired butthead she was, but it was strange nonetheless this was the first he was hearing of it. Now that he put his mind to it, not once did Naruto remember Sasuke mentioning his own birthday had arrived, or even when it was. Was there a day Sasuke seemed out of the ordinary, maybe happier than usual? Naruto just couldn't remember. Sasuke happy? That was a good joke.

"Sasuke's birthday already passed?" the boy asked, leaping over the whole point of her speech and all its content for something he believed more critical. Sasuke already had a birthday... When had that happened? That was news to Naruto.

"Yeah, it was a few months ago. You didn't know?" Sakura questioned the birthday boy with a raised eyebrow. For rivals those two sure didn't actually seem to know that much about each other. It was almost like they were strangers in a sense, never bothering to cease their duel long enough to join company.

"Uh... No, I didn't," was Naruto's simple terse reply. They didn't really... talk. There was little room for friendly conservation among competitors. It should have been no shock Naruto didn't know the date of his most formidable and long lasting opponent's birth, and yet for some reason it did come off as odd to him that he had never heard so much as a peep from the guy in question on the subject even after so many months of being comrades. He must not have thought it was a big deal. Guess they had that in common.

Come to think about it, just like Naruto, Sasuke also didn't have family to celebrate his special day with either. He probably spent it pretty much the same way Naruto did, inside by themselves and uncaring of the circumstances around themselves, much better things to think about and busy themselves with than one more year on this earth. But the thought of Sasuke sitting at home all alone, no one to celebrate with stuck in Naruto's thoughts like an irritating thorn unwilling to be dislodged. His chest felt heavy, heart sinking like a stone as he pictured Sasuke without anyone beside him. That was... so sad. Everyone should have at least one person to say they cared about their existence, to go without being acknowledged, to have no one say your life mattered was a terrible thing. Even a stuck up bastard like him shouldn't have to experience that.

Thinking so clearly and with such empathy over a distressing topic made Naruto experience something akin to a sharp cold chill radiate throughout his body, a quiet little pang of sorrow or guilt in his gut. There it was again, another one of those obnoxious similarities that kept appearing, another occasion when Naruto felt himself disliking the unexpected connection and ties to his rival. He actually felt bad for Sasuke, could you believe that? Feeling sorry for him, jeez what a joke. As if Sasuke would care about such sentiment. He'd probably just laugh divisiveness at Naruto for even contemplating such a thing. He had his groupies to keep him company, ever popular and number one in everything, who gave a crap about anything else.

All these emotions were things Naruto didn't want, this unhealthy sympathy for someone who didn't even want it could be discarded, should be thrown away. But that mental image of Sasuke all alone in his house on his birthday, no one to care that he had been born, well it haunted Naruto. He didn't mind much when it was him who didn't accept the significance of that day, Naruto had plans for recognition and acceptance on the horizon that were more important than one mere party here or there, but realizing the same state of isolation and indifference forced on someone else was a very troubling thing for him. Other people suffering bothered Naruto deeply, no matter who it was. Someone somewhere should care and make the effort beyond just platitudes and pleasantries.

Naruto winced as if stung by a bee and shook his head to throw off the sensation. Sometimes he hated how sympathetic he could feel for people. It was such a pain. Yet another reason to ignore this day had been added.

"I gotta go Sakura. Thanks for the gift though," Naruto abruptly informed the girl, hastily beating a retreat. It was very unlike him to withdraw, but he found it necessary at a time like this.He didn't want to get mushy and emotional around Sakura and make an idiot of himself in front of her. So uncool!

"Sure thing," she replied, noticing he was acting off, but chalking it up to Naruto being Naruto. Maybe he needed to use the bathroom and that's why he was in a rush. "Happy birthday Naruto," Sakura shouted at his back as he sped away towards his home. The evasive young man whirled around and gave her a brisk but sincerely friendly wave and resumed his departure.

Her kindness had unintentionally dug up some things he would have preferred remain buried and no way in heck was he going to have the girl he was always trying to impress witness him have a breakdown if it came down to it. Talk about humiliating! He needed to get home and avoid that kind of feeling all together just to be on the safe side. Before his pesky guilt forced him to do something he wouldn't like even more.

But the quiet contemplation on the walk back home was exactly what the already struggling Naruto didn't need. It brought back memories, many of them unpleasant. It wasn't that he forgot his own birthday as Sakura suspected. As a matter of fact, Naruto really just didn't care either way. It wasn't important to him. He would never say such a thing out loud since Iruka and the others would probably be saddened to hear that, which the boy had no desire to do, but he couldn't help how he felt.

To be frank, birthdays had never really meant anything special to Naruto. It was just another number on the calendar between 9 and 11 in early October. There had never been anyone around to celebrate anyways so why make a big deal? The only people who had ever even told him so much as a ‘Happy Birthday’ were Iruka and the Hokage anyways-excluding Sakura's first time well wishing a few moments ago. No one else around cared enough to even say just two words to him on the day he had been born, so what was the point in getting worked up about it. That's why Naruto kept it private whenever possible. Few in this town had wanted him to even be alive, no way they would be sending happy sentiments and dazzling wrapped gifts his way. He had never had a party with friends or gotten presents either until after Iruka had become his teacher and annually started getting him gifts on this day. Even after then it never really meant much to Naruto. Today was just like any other day to him and the boy never let it define who he was.

Of course Naruto understood the basics of what a birthday entailed for normal folks, but in reality it was little more than just theory and analysis made from afar, like a technique depicted in a ninja manual, just a vague imitation of the truth. The isolated blond had no practical hands on experience to contend with for himself, no first hand idea of what it should be like. He knew very well that theory and application were very different processes. A party with friends, presents from family and loved ones, a giant cake bedecked with mountains of tooth rotting frosting. All just speculation and observation of what he could pick up from movies and manga.

You see, Naruto didn't get to experience that sort of typical cheerful birthday which most kids got. He received few congratulations, fewer presents, and a modicum of the regular amount of attention and affection that the average boy or girl his age would expect to get on such a supposedly happy occasion. Instead, many of Naruto's birthdays, especially when he was younger and more vulnerable, were spent inside doing chores or watching movies. There had been nowhere to go and nothing to do anyways. As the boy aged he began a tradition of pulling pranks and starting trouble for the sheer fun of it, an amusing little gift delivered to to himself. Not that most other people appreciated it, but oh well.

The poor child had no parents to celebrate the occasion and shower him with love, no friends to have over to enjoy the festivities with, decorated with balloons and staring a cavity inducing cake and all that normal stuff. The lack of attention had always made him feel... so unwanted. An unnecessary presence in the world. Until eventually Naruto grew numb to the idea and accepted he would never get the normal experience. Of course it wasn't always so horrible. Grandpa Hokage always made sure to give him a gift every year-even if his sense did stick-and then Iruka-sensei was eventually added to that tiny roster of participants, the man always heading over to surprise him with a cake, not that it was a surprise after the first time anymore, but still, those few offers were lights in the dark to him, sparks that made it worthwhile getting out of bed in early October.

However there was something else about this day that he only realized recently, a grave and important piece of information the boy hadn't known back then. The fact that it was also the anniversary of the day when the Nine Tails went on a destructive rampage and killed so many people in the Leaf Village and his relation to that event. It was the worst of all possible days to be born on. He had noticed it when he was younger, but hadn’t understood the reason why; whenever his birthday rolled around, the way people looked at him dramatically changed. Their face became more vicious, even more hateful than they usually were. He was treated as an annoyance, a pest on most other days, but on that day he was an enemy, a monster. The look in people’s eyes when Naruto passed by became much harder, tinged with dark hues of barely contained anger and bitterness born from sorrow. Like they actually wanted to kill him. Now Naruto understood why, the truth behind those terrifying glares cast his way. It was no wonder he received all those angry looks; those people were probably mourning on the anniversary of their loved ones deaths, with the thing that had killed them right there in front of them sleeping inside the boy. The Nine Tails that killed many Leaf Village ninja lived inside him, and because of that Naruto became the target for their hatred, a terrible fate he had been saddled with that forever destroyed any happiness this day could contain for him.

The old man Hokage had sternly and routinely warned Naruto to stay indoors whenever his birthday rolled around lest the child be subjected to the bitter feelings and lingering resentments of those that had suffered the destruction of the Nine Tails attack. Of course Naruto had no idea that the monster fox inhabited his body and cursed him to this fate and that the Hokage was only looking to keep the child safe. But back then everything seemed so unfair, why should he have to stay locked indoors when all he wanted to do was play in the forest or get ramen? So Naruto, being the scamp he was, snuck out of confinement on more than a few occasions, more than a little tantalized to discover why he had to be sheltered and segregated like a princess locked away in a tower in those storybooks, even more restricted than he usually was on that one day in question. They seemed like just a stupid set of rules used to boss him around or another way to control him. Boy had that been a big mistake.

One time on one of his little birthday excursions he 'forgot' to notify the Hokage about, probably when he was about 6 or 7, Naruto remembered walking home from the playground one evening when suddenly a hard rigid object struck him from behind, slamming forcefully into the back of his head out of the blue and causing the little boy to tumble forwards to the pavement. The feel of a warm trickle of blood draining out from a gash on his skull was still vividly retained in his memories, as was the large jagged rock covered in his blood lying on the ground next to him. When he turned around to see what had happened, who had chucked the stone at him, Naruto recalled seeing five or six older boys towering over his limp body laying prone on the sidewalk bleeding, all of them probably about 16 years or so, standing grouped together in unified disgust looking at the wounded kid with such intense hatred it made the boy shiver in fear.

In retrospect, Naruto now believed they must have been kids who had lost their parents on that day, just like Iruka-sensei, sons whose parents or friends or siblings had sacrificed themselves fighting the Nine Tails. No one harbored THAT much hate without a reason, be it good or bad, righteous or unjustified. But at the time he was just a little kid experiencing violent persecution. And they were lads taking out their rage on the easiest target of convince, directing all their painful loss at the one child who symbolized their destructor, the single life to escape unscathed by that tragedy. It was no wonder they made him the target of their misguided vengeance, the container for the monster fox that had devastated this village and left so many broken, empty homes and families.

The way the older boys looked at him, it had frightened Naruto to his very core. Their eyes were so dark, gleaning with pure and unrelenting hatred for him, devoid of any sympathy. He became very afraid, chilled to the bone by their menacing stares, but couldn’t move his little body, frozen in place sprawled in the dirt and petrified by their striking glares like those of venomous snakes. They began crowding around him, circling around him and boxing him in so he couldn’t escape their wrath. Naruto recollected on how pathetic he was back then, trembling and shivering in utter fear at the sight of the boys towering around him, like giants preparing to crush a mouse. Shamefully enough, he had even wet his pants as they bore down on him, unable to control his paralyzed body functions as dread took a hold of his scared little brain in that horrible situation, fearful of just what they would do to him. But what could he have done, he was facing up a half dozen young men more than twice his age, all of them dwarfing him in size and stature and martial knowledge. Naruto was just a little boy, reacting exactly as one would predict a young child to react in that situation. Even as brash and mouthy as he was, this situation had been way over his little head. How could he prepare himself to be beaten by such an overwhelming opponent let alone five of them? How could he not be utterly afraid for his life, so scared by the hauntingly silent teens and looking down on him like he was vermin to exterminate that he lost control of his bladder?

Luckily for Naruto, before those boys could do whatever terrible deeds they had planned for him, whatever torture they wished him to suffer through so they themselves could feel better, the Hokage arrived on the scene to rescue him. Alarmed at the presence of the old man interrupting their devious plans, the bullies quickly fled. They never bothered Naruto again, likely delivered a litany of warnings and threats from the old man's fearsome repetition. The Hokage never once mentioned what had happened, didn’t bring up Naruto’s pathetic and sorry appearance or deliver any 'I told you so's', but from the look on his face it was apparent he knew precisely what had happened and wished his utmost to prevent any future occurrence of vile aggression. The old man simply took Naruto’s little trembling hand gently in his wrinkled own and escorted the whimpering boy back to his apartment without a word, helping the traumatized kid clean up his soiled clothes and treat the bloody wound left on the back of his head. To this day there was a scar there hidden by his golden locks.Naruto wasn’t stupid, he had no illusions about what could have, or probably would have happened if the Hokage hadn’t showed up when he did. Naruto knew he could have been beaten up very badly by the much older boys… maybe even killed. He wouldn't put it past them; Naruto knew first hand just how hard hatred was to control and contain. He had lived with that burden for most of his life.

This was what birthdays were to Naruto, realizations that his existence was inconvenient and unacceptable to many people. So no, Naruto had no true attachment to this day. How could anyone summon enthusiasm for it after all he had been though? Because, if speaking the brutal and morose truth, until recently he had no attachment to life in general. That wasn't saying he wanted to die or anything gravely depressing like that. He couldn't even be said to be living, but merely existing, there for no purpose other than to suffer. He was an existence that shouldn’t be, loved by no one, wanted by no one, forever alone in the world. That wasn't to make it sound like he was a nihilist seeking nothingness, he had no desire for death. It was just hard to feel anything when you lacked ties to others. The world was an exceedingly bleak place without support and encouragement and attention. But it wasn't so dim anymore. Even if this day still lacked any significance.

"Ugh dammit," Naruto remarked disappointingly with a heavy sigh as he was drawn into those morose thoughts. Those were things he wanted to forget and now they all came rushing back after years dormant, making him swallow hard to force down the lump in his throat. What a crappy day this had turned out to be. Why, the only way it could get worse was if-

Above him seated amidst the branches of a nearby tree a certain figure cleared his throat in order to gain Naruto's attention. Oh no no no, come on! Hadn't today been enough of a chore already with this added on top?!

Wouldn't you know it, he appeared out of thin air as if summoned by Naruto's earlier thinking, right on cue. The last person Naruto wanted to see today. It figured today of all days he wouldn't be able to escape their confrontation. His ears must have been burning like crazy, because you know who was sitting up in the tree above Naruto, just itching for yet another chance to insult his 'favorite' target. Oh, what a day.

"Hey loser," his nemesis called out to him, flat voice indicative of nothing, neither challenging or ingratiating but merely trying to grab his attention.

Naruto turned his head to look up into the branches, finding Sasuke propped up against the trunk, slung in the tree effortlessly like a statue, very smooth and natural. Ugh, look at that smug bastard. 'Hey look at me, I'm chilling in a tree. Aren't I cool?' What a jackass, Naruto reacted unhappily to his rival's unwanted appearance, ready for this day to get spoiled even further. How like Sasuke to ruin the fun.

"Heh, I said loser and you looked," Sasuke snickered in bemusement at Naruto's predictable reaction, figuring he had Naruto trained just like a mutt to respond on command. He always had to get in his jabs whenever he could.

Naruto's face turned a few shades redder, eye twitching in warning of his pending meltdown arriving any second now. He was going to blow up like never before, anyone could see it, the fuming anger in his eyes and clenched jaw gnashing in irate pressure. But before that could happen Sasuke successfully cooled him off with a bizarre stunt, halting any squabble in its premature stages. Like a bull getting waved down with a red cape, Sasuke diverted Naruto's attention just long enough to escape punishment.

"Here, catch," he said, tossing down a parcel towards the ground, aimed at Naruto. Now normally Naruto would have thought he was tossing rocks or smoke bombs or something, but once he saw what was within any sort of rebuke was silenced. It wasn't an insult. It was a damn peace offering if you would believe it.

Naruto easily caught the plastic container Sasuke tossed his way in his palms and looked it over, suspiciously viewing it for traps. It was a small square box made of clear plastic, the kind you use to store left overs or package food for travel with. And inside was a single slice of chocolate cake decorated with chocolate frosting and all. Or maybe it was mud? It had to be right? No way Sasuke, THAT Sasuke, had been thoughtful... right??

Naruto looked up at Sasuke in confusion seeking confirmation of any kind, a grouchy scoff, a snarky laugh in victory that he had tricked Naruto, but finding none the stupefied genin then turned his attentions back down at the cake resting in his hands, then back up and down again between the two about four or five times in utter confusion. Well, this was it folks. Sasuke was actually capable of being nice, which ultimately spelled the end of the world. Pack it up, it was all over.

No way. This was just a bad dream right? His dubious skeptical look of puzzlement said it all, even if his mouth was temporarily out of commission in all the fuss. Eyes wide, mouth agape in shock, whole body at a standstill as he tried to comprehend what had just happened right before his very eyes. But Naruto could only greet the act with a single, stupendously baffled, "HUNH?!"

It turned out THIS was the day he learned birthdays were weird sometimes. And maybe not always a disappointment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to get a tumblr where I can keep you guys better updated on my current progress and delays. It'll be much easier to keep up to date and look for regular ETA updates that way. Don't worry, I'm not leaving! AO3 is still my primary and favorite format, I just thought I'd set up a little base of operations. That way if I go MIA again or it's taking longer than normal you know where to look for quick explanations (and where to put complaints). ̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶b̶a̶b̶l̶y̶ ̶d̶o̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶l̶y̶ ̶u̶p̶d̶a̶t̶e̶s̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶I̶'̶m̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶k̶s̶,̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶g̶r̶e̶s̶s̶ ̶t̶r̶a̶c̶k̶e̶r̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶s̶o̶r̶t̶s̶.̶ There will also be a list of ideas I'm working on or have in mind for future fics there, so you can see what I have planned for other works. And finally it's also a little bit of an ask blog too (lots of those come with drawings, but I can't draw for shit so we're out of luck on that). If you're reading along and have a serious or silly question for any character I write you can come and ask them and I'll give you an in-character response. Just a little bit of fun side content I suppose. You could also ask me stuff obviously.  
> So here it is. [Buddha'sFanFicDictatorShip](https://buddhasfanficdictatorship.tumblr.com/)
> 
> We'll find out why Sasuke made Naruto a cake (a shocking development!) and Naruto's response (it involves ramen) in the second half.


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